Title: Feral Scent

Author: Rain ( im_rain379 )

Genre: Werewolf, Shifters, BxB

Chapters Reviewed: Prologue - Chapter 2

𝖗 𝖊 𝖛 𝖎 𝖊 𝖜 𝖊 𝖗 : thecloudedpages

Blurb Below:

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I. Title: Feral Scent

The title goes perfectly with the genre & concept! I feel that it works really well and it is quite intriguing to learn more about!

II. Cover

Not a busy cover but does look super nice! I like the effects on the cover. Though I will say, I am not sure how I feel that your name isn't on the cover. I am used to the more proper or standard book covers where the name is always on the book cover; but, I guess it is up to the writer on how they feel.

III. Blurb

The blurb, to be honest, is a unique one. I know this is more of a use of a teaser, so it is hard for me to correct it. I am used to the blurb being like a paragraph with a hook to get the reader into it; but you can always try whatever you feel works best, in my opinion.

IV. First Sentences

Not the strongest of the first sentences. It is intriguing since it plays a role in the atmosphere and description of the situation. The first sentences are very beautiful, but I wish for a bit more of a stronger punch at the first sentences. Like perhaps a stronger eeriness or stronger description for the atmosphere to really highlight the atmosphere.

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Shall we begin? SO. You just requested for pretty much a general look at your story so here you go! I am going to go for a bit more like a notes style since it has been working best for me.

Firstly, I want to mention that I like that you don't have a lot of dialogue tags. It is one of my biggest pet peeves so I am happy to see they are minimal here.

Just a quick note, when you do the "..." the way that I use it is like this "..._" because for you I think you were doing it like "...." when it is "..." and then a space. It is just how I do it but I am not even sure it is entirely accurate hahaha.

I will give you props, there are a lot of emotions in the prologue and I find that to be a crucial aspect to include as it is the very first thing a reader can properly read with the story.

There are some grammar / editing errors that I think need to be fixed. I can't place out the specific spots because that would take forever, but I do recommend you take a look back to notice these errors and spot the proper fix to them. Just wanted to point these out to you so you know that there are some errors lurking.

A quick note, when you have dialogue and then do dialogue tag after, the end of the dialogue is in a comma. Example is "The man had already left for the night," the woman proclaimed. See how I have a comma right where the dialogue finishes, that is how it is supposed to function.

Also, on the top of the dialogue tags. I feel that you need to think of more powerful verbs to use rather than "said" because it has been getting quite repetitive and I don't want your readers to start feeling bored while reading.

I don't have a lot of crazy points to make but I will just say. The story to me feels normal. I couldn't see this story as a story that has never been done before, but it didn't feel cliche. Though I will say, I do a lot in the Fantasy, Sci-Fi, & Horror genres with my writing and I do need to point something out. I know it can be fantasy so "anything is possible" but some of the elements you mentioned felt a bit... overdone. Like the door scene where you mentioned the witches & vampires, I was like"... huh." Like description is always nice but that specific thing felt a bit too much like a hyperbole and could have been executed in various other ways. This goes for any other "fantasy" elements within the story.

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Now for my takeaway. I like to keep these short and sweet for you to be able to come back to and just quickly see what you might want to take from this review.

1. Improvements to help:

a. Looking back at the notes on the Cover

b. Packing a bigger punch with the first sentences.

c. Overall had grammatical errors

d. "Showing, not telling" needs to be a strong focus in the chapters as the current state could suffer from making the audience bored or not interested

e. Minimize the dialogue tags

2. My personal opinions of the work:

a. I don't really have any feelings towards the story. It is a good story, do not get me wrong, just not specifically what I gravitate towards so I can't feel emotionally attached to it.

And that is all I have to say. If anything, you can message me through PM or through here (you will have to tag me for me to get the notification) for any additional coverage that you would like me to discuss. That is all from me for now!

Have a great day and hope you enjoy this little review of mine!