"Damn Bug, if I knew you wanted another hole in your face, I would have just run down to the dollar store and bought a hole puncher and done it for you."

"You're hilarious today." I looked back down, scrolling through my phone. I involuntarily bit my sore lip where I just got the new ring last night.

Uncle Charlie and my cousin Mandy walked into the living room, where I was laid up on the couch like a stone gargoyle. If I knew they were coming over, I would have hidden in my room instead of being out in the wide open to be the butt of his poorly executed humor.

I didn't have the patience for Charlie today and was having a rough start to my day. My moods had been up and down for a few weeks since I began sobering up. It started the day I broke down in my mom's arm over Riley and the baby. I told her everything that happened from the first night to the last, sparing her the details of the steamier bits. She held me on the floor and fought back the silent tears, trying to be strong for me like she always had been my whole life.

Inside, my pain was breaking her apart too, but she never let it show.

Mom never became critical or judgmental about what I had done—not even for one second. Once I had finally bled myself dry, she asked me a lot of questions about Riley and who she was. I could feel the warmth creeping back in my body as I talked about the temperamental blond for the first time in six months. I couldn't help but light up when I talked about her smile and the way she would get all fired up and pouty when she was the slightest bit rattled. The sweet little moments when we were lost in each other felt so much closer since the day I left Ohio—even if the bad ones still plagued me like the stench of rotting flesh.

Fuck, I never knew losing something you never wanted could hurt so bad and the drugs weren't helping at all. If anything, they were making things so much worse.

Right then, I decided it was time to pull my self-pitying ass off the floor and get sober again.

I had been going back and forth in my head about what I would do once I got myself clean. I wanted to call and talk to Riley, but a phone conversation wasn't enough to begin making amends for what I did to her. I had to handle this like I should have months ago.

I was going to find a way to make it right.

After a few weeks and the worst of my withdrawal was over, I started looking for cheap rental cars or a clunker I could buy that would last long enough to make the trip. When I couldn't find either, I settled for a bus ticket back to Ohio. I was in the middle of booking it when Uncle Charlie and Mandy invaded my space. The bus didn't cost much overall, but it was still much more than I had. I would have to suffer through a two-day roundabout route to get there, but it was a small price to pay to get Riley back. If I had to go there barefoot, walking over shards of fiery glass, it was what I was going to do—even if I wasn't prepared for any of the consequences of what I was about to face when I returned.

The first time I went to Ohio, I had a little bit of money and a plan. This time, I had neither. My only hope was that when I showed up on her doorstep, she wouldn't slam it closed when she realized I was the one on the opposite side.

"Maybe I should get one of those doodads on my face too. Then, I could slide in a couple of your Momma's spaghetti noodles and save them for lunch tomorrow."

"Or hang a piece of broccoli from it." Mandy's gentle voice chimed in beside him. She began cackling softly and Charlie joined in boisterously howling.

My head snapped up and I raised my eyebrow in confusion as I stared at my uncle and cousin.

What did that even mean?

Uncle Charlie shrugged at me in response and wiped the tears from his eyes. He put his big paw on Mandy's head and brought it close to give her a little kiss on top like she was still six years old. Uncle Charlie adored Mandy and she was his whole world. He always had unconsciously treated her differently than his son Jake, who was Mandy's half-brother. Mom always told me it was because Mandy was a lot like her mother, sweet and filled with kindness. The woman cared for Jake like he was her own when his real mother dropped him off on her doorstep when she got tired of being a parent. Mandy's mom was the only woman Charlie had ever truly been in love with. She passed away suddenly about four years after Mandy was born, leaving a broken-hearted man and two children who loved her dearly behind.

"Good one, Mandy." I pulled my lips back in a forced smile at my cousin.

Mandy took that as a hint to come over and plop down on the couch next to me. She leaned over my shoulder to look at my phone nosily.

"What does that mean?" She asked, pointing down at the screen.

The white screen from the ticket app was mocking me, throwing up another roadblock in my pursuit to get back to Riley Davis. The only card I had available to book the bus ticket was declined.

"Fucking stupid, piece of shit." I slammed the phone on the coffee table in front of me. The whole world was against me; even my mom told me she didn't think it was a good idea to return. She candidly told me she wasn't sure if I was ready yet and that I should give myself some more time to level out. I completely disagreed; I couldn't wait any longer. The pull to go back was growing stronger every day. I knew where I was supposed to be and it wasn't here in Indiana on my Mom's couch. I was supposed to be by Riley's side and there was nothing that was going to change my mind.

"Why do you need a bus ticket? Are you going somewhere?" Mandy asked.

"Back to Ohio," I answered and slunk back down against the back of the couch, trying to sort through the rollercoaster emotions keeping me from thinking straight to work out my next move.

"Why do you want to go to Ohio?" Mandy kept pressing me for more.

I raised my eyes to Charlie, who was standing with his arms folded over across his chest, waiting for an answer to her question.

"There's a girl...." I began to explain and was cut off immediately.

"You have a girlfriend? Oh my gosh! Ezra! I'm so excited." Mandy squealed and bounced on the couch next to me. "What's her name? What does she look like? I bet she's super pretty. Are you going to marry her? Can I be in the wedding? I've always wanted to be in a wedding and catch a bouquet. Do you think I can babysit sometime when you have a baby? I would be the best babysitter. I love babies." Mandy prattled on.

All the color drained from my face instantly. My chest knotted in all the wrong places and I thought I was about to have a heart attack. My limbs were numb and tingling as the blood stopped pumping through my veins. All the cells had frozen over until they burned me alive like I was dipped in liquid nitrogen.

"Hey, Mandy, can you go check on your Aunt Lu to see if she needs help?" Uncle Charlie interrupted Mandy's overly excited chatter.

"Oh yeah, Dad." Mandy jumped off the couch and went towards the hall to go to the kitchen. She turned around at the last second and smiled at me with a full innocent, toothy grin. "I'm so happy for you, Ezra. I can't wait to meet her. I hope we will be really good friends."

Mandy skipped the rest of the way down the hall without looking back to watch my body break apart. Pieces of me were sliding off like I was a sand castle being battered by relentless, turbulent waves. Every time they passed over me, I lost more of myself.

I still had a secret stash of pills upstairs. It wouldn't make it go away, but it would help me forget the feeling long enough to get through it. Just a few tiny white ones and I could close my eyes to all of this again.

"Take a breath. You look like you're going to pass out." Uncle Charlie commanded. He walked over and slapped my back as hard as he could, knocking me back into my body.

My breath burst out from my burning lungs and I inhaled another quickly while I still could.

"She didn't know." He defended her.

"But you do? How the fuck do you know?" I questioned angrily, gasping for air. My pulse was throbbing in my temples and my hands began tingling when I unclenched the fists that I didn't even realize I was making.

"Your mom told me." He started to explain.

"What the hell? Why did she fucking tell you?" I opened my mouth to begin screaming at him. I felt betrayed by my mom. I told her my secret in confidence and she ran straight to him to blab her big mouth.

"Not finished. You can complain about your balls being chaffed later." Uncle Charlie raised his finger in the air to silence me.

Uncle Charlie uncrossed his arms and started rooting around in his pocket. Finally, he pulled out two keys on a ring and threw them at me.

"What are these for?" I asked.

"Keys for the little matchbox car sitting in the driveway. She's fully gassed up and outside waiting for you. She's seen a few miles, but she is good and reliable. I helped rebuild the engine myself." He smiled and went back into his pocket while I stared dumbfounded at the keys in my hand.

Uncle Charlie pulled out a thick stack of cash, waved it at me, and placed it on the table in front of me when I wouldn't reach out to take it from his hand.

"Charlie. Don't." I shook my head and lowered it into my hands. I pushed my hair back off my head and let out a deep sigh.

Why was he doing this for me?

"Take it." He demanded.

"I can't do that. I can't take your money." I argued and ran my hand over my lip ring as I stared down at the cash.

"It's not mine. It's been yours all along. I have just been holding onto it for when you were ready. It's your half of the money from all the jobs we did. You worked hard for it and you earned it. So take it and put it to good use." Charlie leaned over and gripped my shoulder tightly.

"Charlie, you and Mandy need it. Your back is still bad." I argued with him.

"Funny thing happened this morning. I woke up and had way more money than I know what to do with and my back is all better now, too—no more pain. Must have just worn myself out taking care of good 'ole Sheila. Did you know she is a yoga instructor now? The woman knows how to work just the right muscles." He smiled and patted himself on his childish back.

"Wait, isn't she the sheriff's wife?" My mouth dropped open as I connected the dots.

"Not on Tuesdays." He smirked.

"Today's Tuesday," I commented.

"Yeah, don't I know." He grinned.

Fucking asshole had been playing me this whole time. His back was never bad. I didn't want the lying bastard's money, but taking it now was the only way I felt I could even the score. I would take the money and the car as a payment for putting up with his conniving bullshit.

I leaned over, grabbed the cash off the table, and began counting it. With every bill I shifted, I started second-guessing what I was about to do. Not the part about taking the money, but the one about returning to Ohio to beg Riley for forgiveness. It was one thing to go back when it felt like an impossibility and another when I could get up on my feet and leave right now.

"There's $7,000 there," Charlie informed me. "It should be more than enough, but if you need more, all you have to do is call and I will send it to you. Go back to your girl. Tell her you're sorry, that you're an asshole, and that you love her. Spew out some of those pretty things those tortured musicians say that girls go crazy for. I know you didn't go to those guitar lessons for years to waste all that natural brooding talent."

"Do you think she will take me back?" I asked him.

"I have no idea. But, you will never know either unless you try." Charlie shrugged.

I couldn't even thank him. I was so overwhelmed by the gesture that I had no words. I could only nod to let him know I had heard him. My heart raced at the possibility of seeing Riley as early as tonight if I left in the next few hours.

Riley could be in my arms by the end of the night, which excited and terrified me at the same time.