I woke up with my neck bent at the wrong angle and my whole body aching.  My long legs were curled in on themselves, squashed in a too-small chamber.  My foot kept coming in contact with a solid barrier when I tried to stretch out and dangle my feet over the edge.  It felt like I passed out last night, trapped inside a box instead of a bed.

Where ever I ended up, it wasn't where I expected to be when I woke up. 

The squarish burgundy pillow under my head scratched my face when I attempted to bury my nose into it.  It wasn't as soft as the one I had on my bed and it wouldn't mash down in the center the way I preferred it. The only redeeming factor about the damn thing I fell asleep on was its mouthwatering aroma. 

Riley's scent was all over the fabric.

I closed my eyes relaxing into it, enjoying every piece of my girl I could get.

A bony ass dropped down on my thighs, sitting on my legs sideways. The body on top of me wasn't the person I was craving. Riley's nice round cheeks always provided a warm softness when she moved over me. It didn't spear my thigh muscles, tearing the flesh away from my bones.

Unless Riley had another skanky roommate I hadn't met yet, then there was only one person in the apartment who could be using me as their new seat. 

My body froze and I kept my eyes closed, afraid of what I might see if I opened them.  This could be a nightmare, or maybe I finally did it this time—I died and went straight to hell and was doomed to deal with this pestering bitch for all eternity.

The most god-awful slurping noise entered my ears, followed by a throaty, nauseating sigh. 

My eyes jerked open towards the sound, readying to swing. Brynn was sitting on the upper portion of my thighs, way too close to my semi-hard cock, tenting my pants.  She was staring down at me with a smile and slurping loudly from the rim of a coffee mug.

Thank fucking god it wasn't the sound of my dick in her mouth. 

"Get off me." I rolled over from my side to my back and kicked at her. The liquid in the mug flew up and splashed up against her troll face. 

"My bad, I thought you were a new piece of furniture." Brynn scowled and scooted off my legs. She repositioned herself on the corner of the couch and sat the mug down on the table in front of her. She raised the bottom edge of her shirt up high enough to expose the bottom of her unimpressive, bra-less chest, using the bottom of the shirt to wipe the coffee from her face.

"Fuuuhhh-cckkk," I complained loudly and gagged, gulping back a mouthful of stomach acid.

"Good Morning to you too, sunshine." Brynn's shrill voice cut through the room like nails on a blackboard. 

Being in the same vicinity as her gave me a fucking headache and an upset stomach. 

"Shit." I groaned when a sharp pain lanced my side and shot down my leg as the tingling sensation in my feet began to subside.

"Looks like someone partied a little too hard last night." Brynn poked fun at my pathetic condition.  She scrunched up her nose and shook her head in mock disapproval.

"Go away." I groaned.

"On second thought, it doesn't look like you actually had that much fun." Brynn's beady eyes were glued to the protrusion in my pants caused by my overfilled bladder. "Well, look on the bright side, Ezra. At least you didn't get anyone pregnant again last night."

"Riley." I hollered and jumped to my feet to find the blond. One more second alone with her bitch best friend and I was going to open the glass door to the balcony and launch Brynn off it.  Knowing the kind of luck I had lately, it would backfire on me. Brynn's broomstick would follow her out and fly her gently down to safety. 

"Oh, calm down, already. Riley's not even here anyway. She went to try to squeeze her fat ass into a dress for JD and Anna's wedding." Brynn informed me as I went to the back of the apartment to look for Riley in her room.

I rolled my eyes at Brynn's jealously-laced jab at the beautiful blond. It wasn't the first time she had criticized Riley's shape and it probably wouldn't be the last. There was absolutely nothing wrong with Riley's curvy body and Brynn would never convince me or the rest of the world otherwise.

Riley was a fucking goddess.

The door to Riley's room was cracked open slightly. I pushed it open as soon as I made it down the hall, not wanting to believe that Riley would have left me here, passed out on the couch with her blood-sucking friend lurking around.

Riley's bed was made and she wasn't in it. 

Fuck, I wanted her to be here.

I pulled her door shut again and crossed the hall to the bathroom to rid myself of my morning wood. After I finished draining myself, I splashed some cold water on my face to pull myself together. I stood in front of the mirror and leaned against the bathroom counter, using my hand like a comb to smooth out the mangled mess of knotted hair sticking out in every direction. 

I looked and felt like absolute shit. 

My body was crooked and hunched. My whole frame was off, thinning out from the abuse I was putting it through every day and night.  There was almost nothing left of the muscle I naturally carried.  I had always been lean, but it was the strong version of lean.  Now I was frail and sickly, without much else but the skin covering my bones. I could almost see the outline of my heart beating rapidly in my chest under my shirt. 

I needed it to slow down.  It was beating too fast. 

I reached down and grabbed the bottle of pills from my pocket.  There was no cling or clatter as I pried the lid off.

The bottle was empty.

This wasn't fucking happening.

How could I be out already? 

The last thing I remembered was taking a few pills while I waited for Riley to get off work, but then, there was nothing at all—I had no memories beyond that point.  Only blackness without any concept of space and time.

I needed something to take the edge off and dull my anxious thoughts before I tore everything down around me. 

My fingers convulsed as they slipped under the back of the mirror where the medicine cabinet was hidden in the small bathroom.  Riley and Brynn had to have something in there to help ease my suffering. Even something weak could limp me along for another hour.

My eyes caught my reflection at the last second and I hesitated, losing the strength to pull it open. The frosted blue was dull and hollow—making them look like a pale white circle. The light color was centered between the dark red lines where some of my blood vessels were straining to stay in.

Was I still even here?

"Don't do it." The voice in my head begged me to stop.

Riley would be so disappointed in me if she saw me right now.  Not only was I an asshole to her, but I was also now the desperate junkie rummaging through her shit, searching for something else to get a quick fix.

I ignored the voice and opened the cabinet.  My need to get high again was too much to overpower my fading conscience.

The cabinet was almost completely empty, except for a box of Midol and a tube of some girl shit that started with 'vag'. I gave up on the cabinet and shut the mirrored door. Nothing inside it was going to help me. Riley and Brynn had to have something hiding somewhere in the apartment—I just had to find out where.

I turned on the sink faucet and bent down to use my hand to cup some water. I brought it to my mouth, swishing it around and spitting it out to eliminate the tacky, dry heat.  My teeth and tongue felt absolutely disgusting even after I performed the same move a second time. 

It would be hard to get close to Riley when she got home if my own body repulsed even me.

In the corner near the wall, I spotted a ceramic holder with two toothbrushes and a spot that held a tube of toothpaste.  I grabbed the tube, flipped open the top, and squirted a large dollop on my index finger. I shoved the white paste into my mouth, using the tip of my finger like a brush. It wasn't a perfect solution, but it would have to work for right now.

I cupped some more water in my hand and brought it back to my mouth, gurgling and spitting it out into the sink. I grabbed the hand towel hanging on the wall and used it to dry my hands and face before turning to look at myself again in the mirror.

I still looked and felt like shit, but the smell was slightly better—only slightly.

I turned off the light and left the bathroom to head back to the living room to wait Riley out. Brynn was flipping through the channels on the television at lightning speed, barely pausing long enough to give her brain enough time to process if she was interested in what was on the screen. 

Even the way Brynn watched the TV was irritating to me. 

Brynn stopped on some food channel about a hundred channel changes later and threw the remote back on the coffee table. The guy on the screen was holding a plate with some yellow gruel, surrounded by chunky white things resembling curdled milk. If it tasted anything like it looked, the whole panel of people taste-testing the meal would be retching before it even hit their taste buds.

My stomach churned at the thought of consuming the dish. I was also coming down, which didn't help my stomach's restlessness either. If I didn't get some Oxy or something else in me soon, I would get too sick to keep the withdrawal from setting in. 

"Bleh. I can't believe they would eat that." Brynn stuck out her tongue and shuddered when the chubby guy on the screen brought a spoon of the stuff to his mouth.

"It looks fucking hideous." I agreed and plopped back down on the couch as far away from her as I could.

Brynn's company wasn't high on my list of pleasurable activities, but I couldn't leave without seeing Riley again.  I was determined to wait her out no matter how long she took trying on the dress.

I would bet anything that the dress was gorgeous on her.  Riley could wear a paper bag and still look stunning. I would have given anything to be there with her right now, watching her try it on. Just picturing her running her hands over her stomach in front of the mirror while staring back at me had me half-hard again in no time.

Fuck, I missed my girl.

"Looks like someone drank a gallon of cottage cheese, mixed it with a bottle of mustard, and threw it back up on a plate. Could you imagine going to a restaurant and saying, 'Yes sir, can I order the Expired Mustard Seed Cheese vomit'?" Brynn laughed at herself and then accidentally snorted when she took a breath.

I chuckled a bit and slid my hands up to slick back my loose strands of hair out of my face.  I was about to open my mouth to respond when I felt like I was being watched from behind.  I glanced over my shoulder and caught Riley sneaking in through the front door. She stopped and locked her nervous gaze on me.

I began to smile at her until I realized something felt off about the way she was looking at me. The expression on her face was full of guilt like she had done something she wasn't supposed to do. 

What the fuck did she have to feel guilty about? 

Riley's skin was glowing and her cheeks were pink. Her breath was calculated and measured like she was overthinking something. I could see the outline of some troubled memory running through her head.

Brynn spun around on the couch sideways to see what I was looking at. She leaned closer to me like she was going to crawl up over me to block my view of Riley.

"Hey girlie, how was the dress fitting?" Brynn asked.

"It was good. The dress was pretty." Riley forced out the words like they were burning inside her.

Something happened to my girl today and it wasn't something good.

I wasn't imagining or hallucinating the feeling, and it wasn't paranoia this time.

I could feel that Riley was trying to hide something from me deep in my bones. 

"It's a bridesmaid's dress. They are all hideous," Brynn pointed out.

"Yeah, but this one wasn't too bad." Riley shrugged and looked at the wall next to her for a few seconds.

She was acting fucking strange around me and I had no idea why, but I needed to figure it out now.

Riley and I needed to sit down to talk. It was going to be an honest, fucking brutal conversation—preferably one without Brynn between us, interfering and adding to the drama.

I stood up to take Riley back to her room with me so we could have some privacy.

I raised my arms to stretch out my sore back when the pain in my side returned.  The couch sleeping had done a number on me. My shirt rose up a bit and Riley's eyes lowered to the spot where my tattoo was viable just above my waistband.

Riley always loved tracing her fingers over it whenever she got the chance. Some of the best memories we had together included her following the lines, sending chills up and down my spine. It was one of the many things I hungered for on the cold, lonely nights I spent away from her. 

I smiled, noticing she was lost in those memories too. 

Hopefully, they would help remind her what we meant to each other and help lead us through the darkness together.

"You feel any better?" She asked me.

"A little." I bit at my lip ring, debating what I should do.  I wanted to go over and wrap her in my arms just for a few seconds to feel her next to me, but I was also still afraid to do something stupid to ruin the one chance I had to be with her.

Fuck caution.

I needed to hold onto her first and then we could go to her room to talk.

I began to walk towards her slowly and she froze in place. She began turning an even deeper shade of pink that said much more to me than her voice ever could.  I stopped about a foot away from her, wanting to take a little extra time to memorize everything about her.  Riley and I were locked in a staring battle. This brief second where nothing else around us mattered wasn't ever going to be enough.  I wanted to freeze time and stay in this moment forever.

I was head over fucking heels—gone—so, so fucking gone for the girl. 

In a blink of an eye, the spell we were both under snapped, interrupted by Brynn and her constant need for attention.

"I think I'm going to go out for a bit. I'll be back in a few hours." Brynn darted between us. I was actually pleasantly surprised Brynn had decided to leave. She looked uncomfortable being in the same room as both of us and couldn't seem to get out quickly enough. 

I wouldn't mind if Brynn stayed away today or even decided never to return, except I knew how much losing her would hurt Riley.  I could already see the worry lines forming near Riley's eyes as she watched her friend grab her things and book out of the apartment without looking back.