I don't remember much after I screamed for Jax to wake up. It was all a blur after that. I was shaking and my eyes were wide open I felt tears going down my cheeks but I wasn't crying anymore. I felt someone pick me up but I didn't care, it wasn't Jax that picked me up so why should I? I heard someone gently calling my name but I ignored them. I didn't want to focus on them I was still looking at Jax, looking for even a small sign that he would wake up and tell me that he was joking. I was waiting for him to tell me sorry for playing such a sick joke on me. I was waiting, but the more I waited I felt like it was useless. I guess you could say that I'm in shock and denial. But denial for what? Jax could wake up any second now and tell me that he's okay, that we could help him heal and Gideon can hold him while we look for my dad. I told him that but he still fell asleep. Why is he taking a nap now? This is no time to take a nap! The dragon slayers are looking for us for me, and I wanted him to take care of me. Not Gideon not anyone else, him. He was so nice and he helped me and he fed me and he gave me a place to sleep. Why is he sleeping? How long will he be sleeping? He said he was only going to sleep for a while, but for how long?

"Gideon? How long do you think Jax will be asleep?" I asked him and I looked up at him. He looked tired and he was carrying me. He also looked sad. He then started to cry and was about to drop me. "Wait no no, Gideon don't cry, Jax said he would be back he was only going to sleep for a while right? Right?" I asked him in the end and he put me down and quickly wrapped his arms around me. "Please, please I can't take it anymore. Please (y/n) he's gone and he's not going to wake up not ever and i'm so s-so s-s-sorry. Please (y/n) please. I swear for Jax and for you I will bring you back to your father I fucking promise that." He said and he held on to me so tight that I couldn't breath; but I didn't care about that. What does he mean Jax isn't coming back? He said he was going to right? "But he said he would." I said and I didn't notice but I started to cry again. "B-but." I said and that was the last thing I said in that moment. I started to cry hard again and I held on to Gideon for dear life. "I'm so sorry (y/n) I am so sorry." He said and I cried. 

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After a while the captain dropped us off at our stop and we had to make sure that we weren't seen by the dragon slayers. Gideon held Jax on his back and I held on to Gideon's shirt. I was really tired and super sad. I still can't believe that Jax is gone or that is what Gideon said. I looked up at Jax and he still had a small smile on his face. I smiled gently and I walked with Gideon, we passed a village and people looked at us weird or they gave us pity looks. I looked down and before I knew it Gideon stopped. I looked up and seen weird stone slabs everywhere. "(Y/n) I want you to go pick a spot to where you think Jax would like lay down." Gideon said and I nodded and I walked into the weird field. I looked all around me and all I seen was stones with names on it. I couldn't read them but I knew they were names. I walked in front of a really big tree and I looked around it and I seen that it was on a small hill and I could see the village from here. I smiled wide and I looked behind me to find Gideon. "Gideon over here!" I said and Gideon walked up to me still holding Jax on his back. "Jax would like it here, because of the view of the village. He can watch all the people and he can also see the sunset." I explained and Gideon chuckled and nodded. "Yeah you're right, he would love this spot." Gideon said and I smiled. "Good job kid. Okay I need you to do one more thing for me." Gideon said and he started to put Jax down next to the tree. I waited patiently for him to tell me what to do. "Okay I need you to go to the village and tell them that you need two small pieces of wood, string and a shovel." I got a little confused but I nodded anyways. "Good girl now go do that I will be here with Jax." He said and I nodded and ran down the hill to go get the stuff. 

I arrived at the village and I looked around the small buildings. I also seen some people and I walked up to them and I gently tugged on one of the women's dresses. "Um excuse me." I said softly and the women turned around and looked down at me. "Oh? What is it little girl?" She asked me and she bent down to my height. "Um do, do you know where I can find two small pieces of wood, a string and a shovel?" I asked her and she looked a little confused. "Oh what would you need that for sweetheart?" She asked me and I looked down and twiddled my thumbs. "Gideon told me to get those things for Jax." I said and I looked up again and I looked at her about to cry. I didn't want to say his name but I did anyways. "Oh no, I think I know why he told you to get those. Well how about me and my friends get those things for you and we could help you carry them?" She asked me and I smiled and jumped up and down in joy. "Oh thank you miss that is very nice of you!" I said and she giggled and stood up straight again. She also extended her hand to me and I took it and we started to walk somewhere. "Okay sweet heart my friends heard us talking so they will go get the stuff and you and I will go get the string." She said and I smiled and nodded. "Thank you miss you are very nice." I said and giggled again. We walked up to this one building and it had a big window in the front of it. Just from looking inside I could tell it had a lot of pets in it. "This is the pet store sweetie, and this is also where we will find the string!" she said and she walked up to this counter with someone behind it. "Hello what can I do for you?" The guy said and the woman said that we needed string. The guy smiled and he bent down behind the counter and I tried to look over the counter to see where he went. He then shot up and I backed up a little getting frightened. "Oh sorry little one I didn't see you there." He said and he had red string just like my red dress. 

He gave the woman the string and he asked for some numbers? I seen her take out some money and she gave it to him. "Thank you have a nice day ma'am and little lady." The guy said and he tapped his hat and nodded. I saluted him and I held on to the lady's hand and we walked out the store. I seen her friends again and I seen them holding the things that I needed. I smiled widely and I bounced up and down. "Thank you thank you thank you!" I cheered and they all seemed to smile and I we all walked up the mountain. Once we got to the top and I showed them the tree I seen Gideon sitting next to Jax. I smiled and called out to him. "OH!? Hey (y/n)! And everyone else? Who are all of you?" Gideon asked them and the lady smiled and looked behind Gideon with a sad smile. "We heard what happened." Is all she said and Gideon nodded. "It's okay miss, even though I know what Gideon told me, Jax is okay; he is only sleeping for a while." I said and the lady looked like she was going to cry. "Oh sweetie, I am so sorry." She said and she dropped the string and quickly hugged me. I hugged her back and I heard soft sobbing. "Sweetheart I don't think the boy has the bravery of telling you." One of the lady's friend's said. "Tell me what?" I asked them and he looked down and took his hat off placing on his chest. "Sweetheart, that kid is dead. He's dead." The guy said and I got confused. Dead? No he can't be, he told me that he was only sleeping. I know what dead means since Mridul told me what it is, but Jax can't be dead. He can't be, he can't be. "No he isn't, he told me that he was just sleeping." I said and the lady squeezed me and she let me go. "Listen to me carefully sweetie. That boy is dead, he isn't going to wake up. He only said that so you wouldn't worry. But I am so sorry that I will be the one to tell you this and not him. He is dead, I am so sorry." The lady said and I looked down not wanting to believe them. I shrugged her hands off of me and I turned around and looked at Jax, "But he promised." I said and I looked down again and I wiped my eyes from the tears that were starting to develop. 

"Gideon? Are we going to bury Jax?" I asked him in a soft voice and I didn't have to look up to know the answer. "Yes." Is all he said and I nodded. "Okay, can I give him some flowers before you do?" I asked him and Gideon kneeled down infront of me. He put his right hand on my small shoulder and I looked up at him. He was crying. "Yes, yes you can," he said and I stifled my sobs and I turned around running down the hill into the field to get some flowers.  I heard them starting to shovel up the dirt and I tried so hard to keep my sobs in, I really did; but I couldn't. I fell to the warm grass and I started to cry once more. He promised me, he told me that it was just a small nap, he promised me! I cried while looking for flowers. I found at least 3 different flowers and I brought them back up to the hill. I seen that they were almost done with the hole and I walked up to the lifeless Jax. I smiled softly and put the flowers in his hand and I also put his hand on his chest. "Jax? I know you won't hear me and I know you're dead. But I wanted to say, even though I didn't know you for long and you helped me up to this point. Thank you. You are a very good big brother and I-I-I love you for that!" I said loudly and hung my head, I sniffled but I didn't sob. I looked at Jax's face one last time before they grabbed him. I watched them lower him down into the hole and I watched as they prayed and I watched as Gideon started to cry and put dirt on Jax's body. I watched Jax's face for anything of discomfort or any kind of movement; but it didn't come. But the last thing I seen on Jax's face, was a smile.

So I smiled too. 

A/N WOW this chapter is long. Anyways I am very sorry for the late update and I'm sorry for the promises that I keep breaking with y'all, but I hope this makes up for it. I am also very fucking sorry if you cried, I mean shit I almost cried while writing this myself. Welp anyways I hope you have a nice night or day, byeeee!

A/n I made this chapter a long time ago and I guess I forgot to publish it, anyways I will be updating this book as much as I can everyday. And I mean that.

This chapter killed my heart