Constance's joy was contagious and led to a wave of curious gazes coming her way. Only one person resisted, brandishing crossed arms, puffy cheeks and horrendous makeup (a result of eye-opening disappointment from her grand entrance). For after all, no one has ever entered a Pokémon Centre to solely check the regional map. The fine-looking Magikarp added to the list of million reasons why Nurse Joy shot daggers at her, alongside how this particular elderly woman had the audacity to walk past the counter without any pleasant greeting. Surely a nod would have sufficed!

Little did Nurse Joy know, such gestures were too commonplace and everyone had been using them since time immemorial that they wouldn't be able to register a lack of gestures from themselves—how can it be, you must be mistaken, for I did gesture at you in some other way, just not something so fancy as a nod of a head!

No, their uncanny encounter must need a more vivid description, otherwise only too much injustice remains for Nurse Joy. Let's take it from the top.

When the glass doors first slid open, a panting Constance hobbled in with Magi in the tub slung across her shoulder. Enough said, isn't it? Just visualise that. Now, on a scale of one to ten, how many heads will turn towards her? That's right, twenty.

The reason's not very surprising, as you likely can guess. She looked like she came out of the Ultra Wormhole. But enough about Constance. This extended summary– no, recount, was meant to do Nurse Joy justice.

Our beloved nurse knew at once what a peculiar patron this elderly woman was. Not once in her career life — or before she became a full-fledged nurse — had she come across someone who would carry a Water-type Pokémon in a transparent tub like that. They'd cradle and rush into the PC, sweating all over and ignoring the livid stench or perfume or cologne fluttering from their figures just so their Pokémon could be given a place to heal. They'd piggyback their Pokémon if they have to, not once complaining about the back pain or leg cramps. They'd even have a Pokémon latched to their trainer like a long necklace.

But this unruly woman was calm. Her Magikarp, swimming in circles in the tub, seemed so healthy that Pokérus will not go near him. One could say he was in a perfect condition to prove the world wrong about his supposed weakness. This, without thinking, infuriated Nurse Joy who opened her mouth to greet her as she would without discrimination like any other trainer.

"Welcome to our Pokémon Centre! Would you like me to heal your Pokémon back to perfect health?"

It was, after all, safe to assume the woman had other Pokémon. For someone who didn't reside in Viridian City, the path to Viridian, be it from the League or Viridian Forest or Pallet Town would be teeming with wild Pokémon that surely a Magikarp cannot fend off.

The reply was silence, a shrug, and simply passing by the counter. As if Nurse Joy wasn't there. As if the purpose of the existence of a Pokémon Centre was to contain a map, as if the map was a famous painting displayed in the corner, one that could be worthy of replication. With such hideous scrutiny, Nurse Joy wondered if the woman was a thief studying the map just so she could recreate every detail of it and sell it to someone who knew next to nothing about the art.

So here we are, back to the present moment, with Nurse Joy glowering at Constance in silence, albeit with a small smile on her face thanks to the attentive recount above.

Can this situation get any more awkward than it already was? Why, yes. Introducing the writing slump. The truth is, the tension in the room triggered the self-destruct function of my keyboard. Also the sparkling last brain cell trying its best to regenerate nearly gave up. You see, contrary to popular belief, Nurse Joy was anything but.

No, she didn't get a nosejob. Nor did her mascara scream "TRUTH IS MY FOUNDATION, YA BASIC PEOPLE". Simply put, the pink-haired lady did not spark joy. And as a famous woman who vehemently saw the spirits in objects and read their feelings much like Natural Harmonia Gropius did (remind me why he's got such a cute name?) Nurse Joy needs to be vanquished. A pity that she's an essential being so her extinction would be a threat to the universal tapestry. Oh, what an epiphany.

Nurse Joy was healing herself from happiness as all others healed themselves from pain. Extraordinary! It would've been much worse if she was Nurse Woe, because that would mean she's no better than any of us in our boundless suffering. In a nutshell, Nurse Joy was not the same as the people on the ground despite her aura of being down to earth. No wonder she could have so many clones– identical sisters who carried the same voice and accent and decorum. They were wired this way.

As much as I would love to stop pandering to this hypocrite and focus on our protagonist Constance and her beautiful Magi, you must understand it was my intention to keep the hypocrite in the spotlight. I had no choice because the map's out of the centre of attention.

Alas, Nurse Joy grew to be satisfied and satisfactory. It was time to return to Constance and Magi who ought to Bisharp enough to see the world as it was, through the lens of the map.

Constance ran a finger across routes and towns, caves and water bodies, and the distance perturbed her. For a finger to grow weary after a short walk, she could only imagine how much more intense the journey would be for her. Furthermore, no fiery red X marked the Dragon's Gate on the map, so the journey would seem at first glance a wild Zangoose chase or a desperate search for a mirage or illusion that never was. At the very least, locations had not the ability to roam as certain legendaries often would, just to add to their hedonistic lifestyle a sense of accomplishment that they could clock so-and-so bazillions of steps on their tracker and thus be eligible to claim rewards fit for a fit Pokémon (or swole, as some might say) such as an eternity's worth of Pokémon feed, or the chronicles of mundane human life. Well, ain't it great to have narrowed down the scope to simply water bodies and caves?

Plausible areas would then include Seafoam Island, Mt. Moon, Dark Cave and the cave residing on Victory Road. Since Constance loathed passing through Lavender Town whose ghastly atmosphere foresaw a ghoul pulling her into an empty grave somewhere in the Pokémon Tower should she pass it by, Dark Cave was out of the question. With three options remaining, all that's left was guess and check.

Magi slammed his barbel at Mt. Moon, keen at the prospect of reaching the moon, which would be a significant leap for him. The Dragon's Gate must be in there somewhere to prove the sky's never the limit, but cowardice was. Magi couldn't wait to travel through Viridian Forest and take on Pewter City. Water always smoothened rocks. Nothing intimidating there.

"Mt. Moon it is!" Constance glanced at the Magikarp and patted the tub twice. "Let's go!"

As she whirled around, the doors split up to welcome a boy with a Slakoth slung across his chest. The Normal-type ground her teeth and snored, announcing the abundance of health and sloth within. Constance halted out of curiosity.

Nurse Joy perked up when the doors whooshed open, ready to greet her new customer with the flashiest smile ever.

"Welcome to our Pokémon Centre! Would you like me to heal—" She frowned. There was absolutely nothing wrong with that Slakoth, unless the boy thought laziness wasn't the Pokémon's personality trait, but a symptom of some rare disease that definitely wasn't procrastination or the like. Still, she plastered that professional smile and reworded herself. "Welcome! Would you like me to show you the greatest invention ever, the map?"

The boy blinked and shook his head. "I..."

"Well! What special business do you have here, boy?" Nurse Joy crossed her arms and hissed. Accommodation? Food? He didn't seem like he was in terrible need of those.

The boy gulped before turning around. A sticky substance invaded his hair, and he failed to fend it off, causing him to be a new fashion icon of having black hair and purple gradient that popped out like melting ice-cream.

"So, you have something in your hair and you want me to deal with it for you?"

He met Nurse Joy's aggressiveness with equal hostility. "Look closer."

The purple substance grew eyes that stared back at the nurse, earning a yelp.

"A baby Grimer?" She gasped. This was so not the time to deal with mishaps. "Just shave your hair already."

How professional was that, huh? Perfect ten!

"I can't! Besides, it's not a Grimer."

"What? A Ditto?"

The boy groaned. "A Muk used Minimise and continued doing so till it exhausted all its energy. A gust of wind came and swept it up to my hair. It's been clinging onto my hair! My hair! I need hair to look cool!"

Constance, fearing Nurse Joy would soon have a heart attack, decided to step in. Her presence was motherly and sufficed to make him concentrate on her, to make him forget about that Poison-type in his hair.

"You don't need hair to look cool. Baldness is a fashion trend," she said slowly, stealing glances at the boy's face. He was not at all convinced, producing a hideous glare and gnashing his teeth like an entitled Granbull. "Is the Muk a wild one?" When he nodded, she added, "Do you have a Poké Ball?"

While skeptical, the boy still gave it to her. Constance smacked the Poké Ball against the Muk, causing it to shrink further into a freeform red blob of light before disappearing into the Poké Ball. A few strands of hair floated down to the floor.

"My hair! My hair!"

"You're free now," Constance told him and patted his head. "Feel better?"

The boy smiled. "You're so nice! Why didn't I think of that?"

He released the Muk who now spread its body across the floor. Visitors to the Pokémon Centre pinched the bridge of their noses and inched away from them. Nurse Joy wanted to puke.

The Muk stared at Slakoth and moaned in jealousy. How could a Pokémon be so free and attached to its trainer like that? It wanted to be just like Slakoth.

But the old lady didn't put her Magikarp in a Poké Ball either. Her hair was white as snow, and Muk always wanted to know how soft and sparkly snow was, to feel it for a second. Grunting at its enormous size, it began to shrink while shifting closer toward Constance who kept backing away for reasons unknown to the Pokémon.

"What is that Muk doing? No, don't come near!"

The boy squealed a "Thank you" and "Sorry" and dashed out of the Pokémon Centre, glad to evade impending doom, to transfer the curse to someone else.

Constance shut her eyes. This was it. At her old age, she was going to have to deal with a damn Muk of all Pokémon. And Magi was stuck in his tub.

Right, she could count on Magi! After all, the Pokémon defeated a Snorlax with just Splash. Who's to say Magi can't shoo a Muk away? Constance released Magi from the tub and whispered to him about the necessity of victory, using his prior experience in battling as a springboard. For a recently-born Pokémon, he had his fair share of hardships, so what's one more?

For the first time, Nurse Joy retreated from the spotlight and joined the spectacle. A Chansey pushing a cart of tranquiliser darts halted beside the counter with an inquisitive tilt of her head, wondering how the battle would unfold. It was a bold move, after all, to pit a Magikarp of all Pokémon against a Muk, however its size. With a limited move pool and stats, Magi was sure to lose.

Magi chuckled on noticing his opponent, a purple blob the size of a fish pellet. If it wasn't for the fact that he was fighting on land, that Muk would have been nothing. Sniffing the sterile air filled with antiseptic and chatter, he splashed forward. The Muk, sensing the sheer agility of its foe, decided to take him head to head. The result was a bounce off each other's head, causing Magi to flip twice backward while the Muk rolled toward the doors, then propelling itself forward to seize the chance in the midst of Magi's confusion.

Splash would have worked perfectly fine. It turned out great during his battle against a giant, so why was this tiny morsel so infuriating? Magi wished he could stop the Poison-type from inching toward Constance— no, Muk was aiming for his tub! No one should cross a Magikarp, as the great Magi once said, so he thrashed about on the floor in his clumsy pursuit of the Pokémon.

Just before the Muk could catapult itself toward the tub, a stunning shadow was cast on it, forcing it to steal a glimpse. Fatal mistake that was, for its opponent crushed it under his weight. Constance smirked. Applause rang across the Pokémon Centre.

"Bravo!"

"The world needs to see this!"

"Splashing about isn't weak after all!"

"I think I want a Magikarp now!"

"Impossible..."

The noise died down when Magi was flung across the Pokémon Centre to Constance's feet. The fight was far from over, judging from Muk's clingy determination. Constance growled. Magi, influenced by the astounding war cry, stood his ground once more.

"Kum!" The Pokémon cried, worried about its fate. With such a fine toss, the Magikarp should have fainted. It understood at once how tough his opponent was, and its mouth morphed into an 'O' shape. Within seconds, a gooey beam shot out of its mouth. Magi caught sight of the impending attack in his peripheral vision and leapt. Contrary to his calculations, he made a parabola toward the Chansey instead of jumping vertically into the air. The pink Pokémon sidestepped at the last minute, fearful of suffering the same fate as Muk initially did, not without an adorable whimper that made the spectacle's hearts melt.

This proved to be a favourable distraction, for Muk tumbled toward Constance without Magi's protection, and the onlookers could care less about the elderly woman. For someone her age, she would soon dance with death at a ball, donned in an elegant gown full of gossamer and laces, and smile encouragingly while taking death on in a game of tango, whispering saccharinely in death's ear about a "last dance" like she was Cinderella. What warranted more attention was the damned flip of the trolley thanks to Magi's bullseye aim, sending tranquilliser darts flying across the waiting area and creating a flurry of excitement.

Thankfully, none of those darts managed to scrape skin, though one did hurl into the top of a violet sphere. Muk's excruciating yelp was the best aria anyone had heard in a while, one that ended with a decrescendo into slumber.

A standing ovation was held for the unlikely winner of the battle. Using his wits and limited abilities, Magi successfully won the hearts of the judges and was glad to be handed a packet of Poké Blocks, courtesy of the resident Chansey. Magi took the packet by the teeth and tossed it to Constance. The packet broke midair, raining rainbow-coloured food for scrambling Pokémon and children alike to taste the rainbow.

"It's the Magnanimous Magi!" Someone said.

Another woman recognised Constance to be the best trainer of her years, to battle with such an unconventional style so unexpected from her relatively conservative generation.

Constance scooped Magi up from the floor and glanced at the peaceful Muk.

"We will handle Muk," Nurse Joy reassured her. Now she had nothing but respect for the old woman who defeated a fully evolved Pokémon with a mere Magikarp. "How can I help you?"

"Could you heal Magi?"

Nurse Joy nodded with a grin. "I knew you would come around."

"Also," Constance added. "Do you have a copy of the map?"

"Never mind." Nurse Joy got down to healing Magi before the words "you Dora" could escape her holy lips.

Constance could only think of all the adventures awaiting Magi and her in their journey to the Dragon's Gate. She reckoned it would be more exciting than its beginning.

Holding the map in her hands, she decided she would head to Mt. Moon, followed by the Seafoam Islands should the Dragon's Gate not be in Mt. Moon, which was impossible to imagine, and eventually the cave at Victory Road, should the Dragon's Gate not be in Mt. Moon and Seafoam Islands, which was even more impossible to imagine. With the journey clear in her head, she left Viridian City with Magi swimming joyously in his tub.