Sapphire led Zeke through a door and they emerged in some sort of private outdoor courtyard. It was a dominated by a large fountain that was filled with crystal clear blue water. Some sort of lights were rigged inside it, which caused it to gradually change colors. There was a bench by the fountain that looked like it was made out of marble or something like it. A tall gray wall ran along the back of the courtyard. Overhead was open sky and Zeke could see a brilliant collection of stars shining down.

"Wow, fancy," Zeke said.

"We pride ourselves on being the classiest adult entertainment establishment in town," Sapphire said with a smile as she sat on the bench.

Zeke heard the door open behind him and a gopher wearing a tux shirt with a black bow tie walked in. He carried a pencil and a small pad of paper. "Would you care to order a drink for the lady, sir?"

"Oh, I just got her a drink inside actually," Zeke said.

"Would you care to buy her another one?" the gopher asked.

Zeke looked over his shoulder and then turned back to the gopher and lowered his voice. "Look, I see what you're doing here. You obviously follow people back here and ask if they want to buy some doubtlessly overpriced drinks, knowing full well that nobody wants to look like a cheapskate in front of the stripper right before they're about to get a lap dance."

"You're on to me, pal," the gopher said loudly. "So you going to buy a drink for the lady, or what?"

"All right, fine," Zeke said as he darted his eyes back to Sapphire again. "I'll buy her a drink, but this is some serious bullshit. I bet she drinks as much as she wants for free anyway. Or at least gets a serious employee discount. This is quite the scam you people have going here. Let's just bleed these suckers out of all their hard-earned cash."

"That'll be one canister of floss," the gopher said.

"One canister? For one drink?" Zeke said. "This is highway robbery. Here's your canister. I hope you sleep well at night."

"I'll be right back with the lady's drink," the gopher said.

"Why don't you come sit next to me, handsome?" Sapphire said as she patted the bench.

"I think I will," Zeke said with a hiccup as he took a seat. "Man, those drinks are strong. I think I'm getting kind of hammered."

"That just means you're having fun," Sapphire said while rubbing his leg with her hand. "I'm glad. I want you to have fun."

"I want you to have fun, too," Zeke said. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm sure being a stripper's a great job and everything. But sometimes it's got to suck having a bunch of weird dudes pawing at you all the time. I just want you to know I'm a good guy who's here because my friend's getting married and I really don't go to strip clubs very often. Hardly ever, really. Not because I have anything against them. They're perfectly fine and I totally respect you. I'm just saying I'm not one of those perverts who comes to strip clubs and acts like a freak. I'm just going to sit here and be super chilled out and I'm not going to do anything creepy or anything, so you don't have to worry about that."

Sapphire put a finger to Zeke's lips. "Hush. I only give lap dances to people I want to give lap dances to. Just relax. You're here to have a good time and I'm going to show you one."

"Okay," Zeke said with a gulp.

Sapphire closed her eyes, took in a deep breath, and exhaled slowly. "It's a beautiful night, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Zeke said. "I dig this outdoor courtyard thing you've got going on here. It creates a nice ambience and it really is the perfect night for it, weather-wise. It's probably not so pleasant out here in the winter though. Does it snow here? I've never been here when it gets cold."

"Don't worry," Sapphire said. "It's about to get real hot out here. I've been told I'm really good at my job."

"Oh, right," Zeke said. "So I've got to be honest I've never really gone in the back room of a strip club before. I've heard stories about weird things going on, and I just want to make sure this is all going to stay 'on the level,' so to speak. You seem like a nice girl and everything, but we just met and I don't know how stringent your industry is about testing for STD's and stuff. So basically, what I'm saying is when you say it's going to get hot, you're talking about the lap dance, and not referring to some 'extra favors' or anything like that, right?"

"I'm saying it's going to get so hot, you're going to need some water to cool down," Sapphire said as she scooped some water out of the fountain with her hand and splashed Zeke in the face with it.

"Oh yeah?" Zeke said. "Well, maybe I'm the one that's going to make it hot for you and you're going to need to cool down." He reached into the fountain and splashed her back.

"Now you're getting into the spirit," Sapphire giggled as she splashed him again.

Zeke heard the door open again and looked up to see the gopher carrying a large tray of drinks. "I have returned with the lady's beverage," he said. He started to walk over to the bench, but slipped on a puddle of water that had accumulated on the floor from all of the splashing. He crashed right into Zeke, spilling the whole tray of drinks all over him, many of which were brightly colored and instantly stained his shirt and pants.

"Oh no, poor baby," Sapphire said. "He made a complete mess of your outfit. Here, let me help you out of those things." She pulled off his shirt and started to unbutton his pants.

"What are you doing?" Zeke asked. "I thought you were the one that was going to take your clothes off."

"There will be plenty of time for that later," Sapphire said. "First we've got to get you taken care of. We have an on-site laundry facility. It comes in handy. You'd be surprised how often we get weird stains on our outfits."

"Yeah, that's one of those strip club details I don't really want to know about," Zeke said.

"I'll run your clothes over there right now. It won't take very long. Just wait right here. When I get back I'll give you that lap dance on the house along with a drink on me."

"Uh, okay," Zeke said as he watched her run through the door with his clothes.

"Nice underwear, pal," the gopher said as he picked himself back up. "Nice socks, too."

"Huh?" Zeke said as he looked down. He had forgotten that he was wearing the tighty-whities and bright pink socks that Nulfar had provided him with. At the moment that was all he was wearing. "Yeah, well they're functional, at least. That's all you really need when it comes to socks and underwear. Don't you have some other poor saps getting lap dances to go bleed money out of?"

"Yeah, I've got to go get another tray of drinks, thanks to you," the gopher said.

"Thanks to me?" Zeke said. "You're the clumsy buffoon that can't keep his balance. In fact, I think you should give me my canister of floss back."

"Sorry, pal, it's already been dropped in the safe," the gopher said. "Got to get back to work." He slipped through the door and closed it behind him.

Zeke sat on the bench and tapped his toes aimlessly while he stared at the fountain. "It seems like Sapphire's been gone awhile. I wonder how long the laundry cycle takes?" He started whistling to himself as he watched the tile on the floor spin around. "Man, I'm pretty drunk. Has she been gone a really long time or does it only seem like it because my sense of time is all messed up? Also, it feels a little chillier out here now that I'm wet and sitting in my underwear."

After what felt like an hour Zeke finally heard the door open again. Someone came out into the courtyard humming softly to themselves.

"Sapphire?" Zeke called out.

"Oh my goodness! Me oh my, what in heaven's name do we have here?"

Zeke looked up at the new arrival and blinked his eyes. "You're not Sapphire." He squinted and tried to get a good look, but his vision was spinning around in an alcoholic blur. Something about her seemed familiar somehow.

"I remember you, honey child. Damn, you be some fine piece of man meat. Big Bertha was just stepping outside to get some fresh air. She didn't realize she was getting her Christmas present early."

The new stripper was starting to come into focus. She was big and round and looked like some unholy combination of a water buffalo and a warthog. Her stringy black hair hung in clumps around her puffy, splotchy face and she looked like she'd grown several more warts since the last time Zeke had encountered her. She had hair in all the places hair wasn't supposed to grow and her enormous, saggy breasts flopped limply around as she moved.

"You've got to be shitting me," Zeke said as he jumped to his feet.

"This ain't no joke, cookie butter," Bertha said. "This be a dream come true. I never got to do all the things I was going to do to you last time. I've been thinking about you for a long time, sugar dumpling. And here you be all undressed for me already. I'd best be locking this door so's nobody be interrupting us."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Zeke asked. "I thought you worked at that other strip club. That weird ladies' choice place."

"Oh, I haven't worked there in ages, pudding pie. This place be the new joint where everyone wants to go, so I's came and got me a job over here. I didn't think anyone was using this here courtyard at the moment, so's I thought I'd come have me a smoke. But now I sees I'm going to get my jollies, too."

"Nothing jolly's happening around here," Zeke said. "I can assure you of that." He walked to the other side of the courtyard so the fountain was in between him and Bertha.

"Don't you be acting all shy now, butterscotch muffin. This here's the private area where anything goes. And I mean anything. And a whole lot of nasty things is about to go down here. Old Bertha likes it kinky."

She started to circle around the fountain. Zeke moved in the opposite direction, keeping the fountain between them. When he got by the door he jiggled the handle, but it wouldn't turn. He studied it trying to find where the locking mechanism was, but he wasn't able to locate it. Finally, he started pounding on the door with his hand and calling for help.

"Ain't no one out there's going to help you," Bertha said. "They soundproof those doors for guest privacy. Don't want nobody getting disturbed when things get wild back here. And things going to get real wild when I get my hands on you, sugar plum."

"Lady, you seriously need to learn how to take no for an answer," he said.

Bertha had managed to sneak up behind him while he was struggling with the door. He tried to dart around her but she cut him off at the pass and he suddenly found himself cornered.

"Now comes old Bertha's favorite part. But first you're going to need to lose them there panties."

Feeling a wild adrenaline rush of strength Zeke shoved Bertha as hard as he could. She stumbled backwards and fell head over heels into the fountain. Zeke took advantage of her momentary incapacitation and jumped on top of the bench. He grabbed the top of the outer gray wall and pulled himself to the top. It was completely dark on the other side and he couldn't make out any details. He heard Bertha dragging herself out of the fountain, so without hesitating he dropped over the other side of the wall and into the blackness beyond.