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Ms. Oh, if you don’t pay the rent until the day after tomorrow, I won’t have any choice but to kick you out. And I won’t be kind. So please settle your balances soon.

This is the last text message Seunghee received from her landlord today. She still hasn’t paid the rent for three months. And she doesn’t even know where she can get that amount of money. She can’t borrow from her members, they’re all just students and money isn’t really a thing of interest in the band. Elkie’s the only person she can ask from but she’s not around so she has no other way. She’ll do what she can to talk to the owner again. And she hopes she gives her another month of kindness and consideration.

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“Seunghee-ya, here’s the draft I made,” Minhyun walks over Seunghee the moment she arrives at their waiting room. Dongho and Jonghyun are sitting just behind.

She gets it from him and sits on the couch. Minhyun sits beside her as she glances over the piece of paper.

“This looks good. Why don’t we try it?” Seunghee says.

The keyboards is already set up near her and she just pulls it closer and starts hitting the keys. Minhyun starts singing the lyrics as she plays.

“[Song: Wanna One - Always]
Gamabwa cheoncheonhi du nuneul
Neukkyeobwa uriga hamkkehal
Maneun shigan maneun yaksok
Eoneusae iksukhan eolguldo
Neomuna sojunghan shigandeul
Hanahana naegen teukbyeolhae
Maebeon jichyeo himgyeowodo
Nal bomyeo useul ne saenggage himeul nae…”

Hearing him, Dongho and Jonghyun come over them to listen better. After finishing the first verse, Seunghee stops playing too.

“So what do you think guys?” Seunghee asks them.

“It’s seldom you write a ballad,” Jonghyun comments at Minhyun. “But it’s good.”

“Yeah, let’s just put some alternative rock in it and it’s good as a new single,” Dongho adds.

“Okay, let me play the rest of the song and then we’ll arrange it later, okay?” Seunghee utters. “And you sing the lyrics Minhyun-ah.”

“Right when you’re ready,” Minhyun replies.

She restarts playing the melody and Minhyun eventually starts singing. As the song progresses, it sounds even more amazing. It’s a perfect song for a finale. But as the lyrics goes, she suddenly realizes that it’s all about his feelings. It may be about the band, but Minhyun isn’t the type to openly write about that in a song. Right then she feels burdened. This song can be about her. And if this song is about her, then he has not moved on from her all along. And it’s definitely not good for her and the band.

Jonghyun and Dongho also discerns the depth of the lyrics. No matter how they decipher it, it’s only about Seunghee. That was where the problem started and they just hope Minhyun will not revert to that phase of his life where all he ever thought about is himself. They hope he won’t risk the future of the band again.

Minhyun is solemnly singing the song. It’s true this song is about Seunghee. And all he wishes now is that she realizes how much he means to her soon. Cuz he’s not giving her up just like that. He can’t even if he wants to.

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“Seunghee-ya,” Minhyun says in the middle of packing up.

The day has ended and so does their stage for tonight. It’s past 11PM and they’re still packing up before going. Dongho and Jonghyun are also getting ready to go just behind Seunghee and Minhyun who are still standing infront of the crowd.

“Can I take you home?” Minhyun asks Seunghee.

It’s been two weeks since they made up and it’s just today that he exerted effort in pursuing her again. But Seunghee is a bit surprised hearing him talk about it out of the blue. They’ve made up yes, but she thinks she can’t be with him alone just yet. She doesn’t want to.

“Minhyun-ah…” she hesitates saying it, but it shows all over her face.

And Minhyun is not blind to see that. So before she can reject him outright he replies, “It’s okay. Yeah, maybe some other time.”

He walks away from her feeling a little frustrated and the two guys behind them completely notice. They walk over the empathic girl who can’t even do anything about it.

“Hey, aren’t you being harsh on him?” Jonghyun says even though he’d rather not see them together than end up in another conflict again.

“He’s putting a lot effort Seunghee-ya. You know, if you don’t really like him, then maybe it’s better that you tell him off right now,” Dongho advises.

Seunghee just looks over the two and keeps her silence. Then she glances at Minhyun who’s at the corner fixing his things. She really needs to tell him the real score. That she can’t really see him other than a friend and a colleague in the band. Maybe it’s the right time to tell him.

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Laying on her bed, Seunghee has finally decided. Tomorrow night she’ll tell Minhyun her real feelings. She can’t prolong his agony. Dongho and Jonghyun are right, she’s being harsh on him. He deserves to know the truth.

Meanwhile, next door, Jeonghan is peacefully sleeping, tucked in tight on the bed. He’s exhausted from the nightly performances that’s being more hectic by the day.

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“Minhyun-ah, can I talk to you?” Seunghee approaches him at the end tonight’s stage.

It’s only 11PM and she has decided to tell him tonight, about the real score between them. In the back of his head, he wonders what it is about.

“Yeah,” he just replies.

They end up at the backdoor together, at the same spot where he confessed to her. It feels like déjà vu for him that he chuckles out of nowhere.

She notices and asks, “What’s funny?”

“This is the same spot where I confessed to you, isn’t it?”

It just dawns to her that fact as she looks around and says, “Yeah. I didn’t notice.”

“It’s okay.”

He stares at her for a moment and his world just slows down. She’s beautiful. She’s everything he ever wants. Playful, talented, witty, with a number flaws but he can accept it all. But now all of a sudden fear envelops him. He has a bad feeling about tonight. He knows she’s here to tell him something very important.

“Minhyun-ah,” she starts.

But before she can continue, he cuts her off first, “I’m still waiting for you to accept me.”

With what he just said, he makes it even more difficult for her to tell him. But she can’t back out on it now. She has to make it completely clear to him. And this is also her step to pave her way to the one she likes entirely.

“Minhyun-ah, I have something to tell you.”

“Are you here to finally reject me?”

She’s staring back at him perceiving the sadness in his eyes. She doesn’t want to, but she has to. It’s for the sake of their friendship. She won’t prolong his pain any longer.

“I’m sorry. I just want to be completely honest with you. I don’t think I can feel the same way. Let me rephrase that. The truth is it’s been a while i've been pondering on it but I truly can’t feel the same way.”

He knows it will hurt. But he didn’t know it will hurt the way it does right now. It’s the most painful experience to lose the one person you only want in your life and he’s just lost for words to express it.

“I really wish to be friends with you for as long as I live. And be with you, and the others, in this band altogether. I wish we can start all over again after this. Like how we used to. Like how we started.”

He just nods, hardly repressing his emotions. “I’ve known for a while. But you telling me about it is surreal. Can you leave me here for a moment? I think I need to be alone.”

She knows it will be rude to comfort him when she’s the one who inflicted him pain. So she obliges and walks away in silence. And the moment she’s gone, he turns his back and looks up to the sky, with tears streaming down his face. How he wishes it’s raining right now. But life is too cruel for that to happen. So he drowns in his pain as the moonlit night shine down on his sorrows.

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Seunghee goes home early for the night. Part of her feels bad but a bigger part of her feels light and free. Telling Minhyun what she really feels lifted the load she’s been carrying for a while. It’s really never wrong to talk things with people and be honest with them.  Especially if that person is someone close to your heart. She just hopes he moves on quickly from it and everything goes back to normal.

She decides to drop by the nearest 7/11 to buy something to eat. She suddenly got hungry after all that tension. While browsing the food stand, she comes across another person looking for something. And when they turn to each other, it’s a surprise. Cuz it’s Jeonghan.

“Seunghee-ya!”

“Well, hi there, Jeonghan-ah.”

They both carry these undeniable happy faces to have seen each other again tonight. It feels like ages they’ve been together like this.

In a few, they sit together at a table, both eating some ice cream and some bread to go along with it.

“I think this is the first time we ate together,” she says.

“I guess so,” he replies. “You seldom walk in here though.”

“Yeah, I prefer to cook my own food. I usually get something from the restaurant.”

“Lucky you. I almost eat nothing but fast food lately.”

“I can share with you sometimes. But maybe that’s impossible with our schedules.”

“To think it, yeah. I don’t think that’s possible. You even work later than I do.”

“Well, that’s the thing right?”

“Don’t think about it. It’s okay. We can go eat out sometime.”

“That sounds better.”

She smiles at him and he smiles back as they both chew on their food. A simple time together like this is just right for them. Their feelings are slowly being attached without them saying a thing about it but it’s obviously evident.

Though he’s still unsure of his position in her life, Jeonghan is calm. He doesn’t label things between them just because he knows she likes him. He really likes her, and at this point, he can easily confess to her any moment. But he’s taking his time. He wants her to be fully at home with him before tells her his real feelings. And that time may be in the nearest future.

Seunghee is still in awe as to how they end up being this close despite their atypical start. And the fact that she likes him, it is even more surprising that she can face him calmly like this. It’s like they’re old friends, just chilling out on a cool evening. She feels relaxed showing her real self infront of him, without any pretension, without being on guard or anything. He’s the only one who can let her feel like this and she’s totally falling for him. She just wonders why he doesn’t seem to touch any topic related to relationships. And she’s not one to open up about it too. She doesn’t even want to tell him about Minhyun.

After finishing their snacks, they walk together to their apartments, the cool breeze brushing against their skins.

“The weather’s getting colder now,” she says.

“Fall is ending, you should wear warmer clothes in the days to come,” he tells her.

“You too. It’s hard to get sick when you have nightly performances.”

“I know. Speaking of which, we’re gonna be in Jeju again tomorrow. We’ll be there for 2 days and Seungkwan’s a little hesitant cuz that’s where he last spent time with his girlfriend. It’s funny he’s making all excuses not to go but ends up going anyways.”

He grins and she giggles lightly, then she replies, “He probably misses her a lot. I miss her too, I can’t even imagine how much he does.”

“He calls her often and now his phone bills are blowing.”

“Wow, such a zealous boyfriend.”

In the middle of it, she realizes they’re talking about relationships at last. He seems interested about it. But then, isn’t he interested in her? She’s pondering at it all the while and he notices her silence.

“What is it, Seunghee-ya?”

He’s staring at her when she turns to him. “Huh? Nothing! I’m just thinking of… the rent! I should be paying the rent soon.”

“Oh, yeah. I heard someone is behind paying the rent and I think the landlord is really gonna kick him out soon. I wonder which door it is?”

There are two more doors at the ground floor and of course, both of them occupy the upper floor. She suddenly feels burdened. She really has to talk to the owner and beg him again for another month extension.

“Hey, if you have troubles about the rent, you can tell me. I can always help you out,” he assures her.

“Yeah, I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks,” she’s thankful. Maybe she has to tell him somehow.

“Here.” He hands her his card. “I was thinking the other day, it’s been so long but why haven’t I given you my number? And why don’t I have your number too?”

Now that she thinks about it, he’s exactly right. She smiles at him, “You’re exactly right. So let’s exchange numbers right now.”

“Sure thing.”

“But I’ll keep this card for souvenir.”

“Yeah. No problem about it.”

She wants to keep the card because he has a picture in it. It’s like an ID card or something. Wonder where he got it, but it’s really cute. In the meantime, they exchange phones and dial each other’s numbers and return it to each other.

“Done,” she says. “I’ll call you sometime.”

“You can call me anytime. Please don’t hesitate to,” he replies.

They step up the stairs and finally reach their doors. Unfortunately, it’s about time to say goodbye again.

“Good night Jeonghan-ah.”

“Call me alright. I’ll always answer if I’m not in the middle of performance.”

“Yes, I’ll take note of that.”

“Alright. Go ahead, good night Seunghee-ya.”

She only smiles at him then and then opens her door but takes another look at him before closing it. For a moment, right after she’s gone in the view, he feels uneasy. He can’t put his finger on it, but suddenly, he worries about her. He just hopes nothing happens bad to her.

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Talking with Jeonghan last night did pull an all-nighter for Seunghee again and she woke up late today for class. She’s in high spirits though cuz he was in her dream. He was walking her home just like usual, but he was holding her hand tight. It felt so real that she didn’t want to wake up. The feeling lingers and she’s just overjoyed for today. She’s in good mood all morning. But everything takes a downside turn when she goes home for lunch right after her morning subjects. Shockingly, she finds all of her things just outside her apartment. She runs to find her room locked with a new lock and her things all piled up at the corridor. She tries to call the owner but she doesn’t answer. It leaves her in shock and speechless. She’s merciless.

In the end, Seunghee is now kicked out of her apartment and it’s devastating.

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TO BE CONTINUED…

Published: 12/15/17