"The General is imposing Martial Law during the course of the annual charity concert 2014, it seems. Tickets will be triple-checked for fraud, and attendees will be required to pass a CAPTCHA test in order to prove whether they are 'Human, robot, or alien.' This causes trouble for resident aliens of IBSA...*Cough* Tania Husayn *Cough*...." (Nitty Gritty Issue no: 769, December '14)

Convincing the gang to come over for lunch was easy.  Prepping them, (as well as an overexcited Maria, and Ruby) was harder. I subtly told them about Maria, so they wouldn't freak out when they see me conversing in fluent "Sign" language. For the most part, my sister is used to the curious glances, and mixed reactions from strangers, but I still hate creating awkward situations for her.

Mama dressed carefully for today, her high-neck, dark green wool dress striking against her auburn hair. Maria looked incredible in her long-sleeved white, silk crop-top and floral skirt. I was also, unusually fancy in Maria's over-sized digital print shirt, and black tights. We never entertain guests shabbily at Hayat House-One of Mama's cardinal rules. 

"Do your friends prefer oriental? or Italian?" Ruby had probed me about the lunch menu ideas. 

I thought about the time Azaan cheerfully ate the contents of a teabag as a dare. 

"They'll eat anything you whip up Ruby. For real." I informed her.

'I can't wait to meet him!' Maria told me the tenth time in twenty four hours. 

'I'm glad one of us is excited about this.' I grumbled. Maria had no idea the potential for embarrassment that Mama posed with every derogatory question, and moody comment. 

When none of the gang had arrived by 1 pm, Mama started showing signs of irritated impatience. Her tongue clucks, foot tapping, and constant phone calls to her producer made it clear that her precious free minutes were being wasted on my account. 

I texted Pareeshae.

Me: Where r u guy?? :/ 

P-shay: Daniyal slammed his car into a bike. We're sweet talking our way out of this. Wait. 

Me: SHIT! :O want me to send backup? Khan has a big gun somewhere. Probably....

P-shay:  I'll let you know. I'm with Azaan atm. He is nauseated.

I panicked and called her then. She couldn't hear me well, but managed to yell the story out, while pep-talking Azaan out of his sickness.

"He is EXTREMELY sensitive to blood yaar (mate)! The bike guy Daniyal hit, got this half-inch gash on his forehead, so we stopped Azaan's car to help them out...The princess wanted to help clean the guy up, but then he started gagging, and swooning like a lady." Shay pauses to speak to what seems like Faris, I can hear the buzz of Motor-bikes, Rickshaws and Buses in the background. A mix of Karachi's soundtrack. "We're on our way, Layla. Don't worry!"

I informed our household of the revised plans, which earned appropriate gasps from the ladies, and raised-eye-brows (He gags on blood?) Half-an-hour late, I breathed a sigh of relief when the doorbell finally rang. 

Introductions were awkward, with Maria nodding and grinning as I pointed out everyone. Mama smiled and asked about the accident, and whether she could help out with the Police report. I saw the gang gaping around our sprawling mansion, and surrounding gardens. They politely commented on the beauty of our foyer. Our house is a remodeled version of an old-red-brick home, with a mix of modern and ethnic Mughal architecture, I suppose I don't often realize how pretty our entrance is, with its wrought-iron candle-stick chandelier, and a brick-hewn fountain. 

Pareeshae was uncharacteristically shy throughout the intro with Mama. I guess, it gets weird seeing a celebrity in flesh. It's probably weirder to be invited to their home for Lunch. I wouldn't know... Syra, Daniyal, and Faris were polite, and very formal. (Asadomer were unable to attend)

Azaan was himself. Just slightly paler and windblown. He greeted Maria in sign language, which surprised the hell out of me. Maria was so excited to see this gesture, that she immediately started telling him horrifying details about all the stories she has heard of him from me, and the fact that she felt like she already knew him...blah blah. I tried nudging her, but she just tweaked my cheek in response. Eventually, it became clear that Azaan was lost.

"Ahhh, I'm sorry, but I just know how to say Hello, How are you?' In sign. I have no idea what you're saying..." He shrugged. Maria's hands stop, and she nods slowly. 

"She can lip-read pretty well, at a close distance." I tell him, so he wouldn't leave her hanging. "She took a lot of courses back in England."

"Oh! So you grew up in UK right?" He asks Maria, who grins and nods. "Yep, I can totally tell."

Maria tilts her head confusedly at that.

"You have that British accent, you know." He says straight-faced. 

Pareeshae gasped at that, staring horrified at Azaan. Even Faris raised an eyebrow at this idiocy. My eyes were on Maria. She turned slowly to face me, her lower lip quivering. We stared at each other for a heartbeat, before falling into fits of laughter. 

I was slapping my knees, as I howled. Maria clutched Shay's arm for support, as her silent giggles refused to subside. Mama patted me on the back, before making her way towards the dining room, muttering about hors-d'oeuvres.

Azaan just dimpled his way out of this potential faux pas. Maria signed to me then and there, 'He is perfect!' Naturally, I snorted back.

"Hey, what did she just say?" Azaan demanded as Maria led us to the Living room. 

"She thinks you're cute. Because you fainted at the sight of Biker-dude's blood." I lied. 

"My selective attention span, only heard the cute part."

"Whatever floats your boat Bella Swan." 

"Damn. I have got to read that book. Every time I faint on blood; someone calls me Bella..."

.......................................

Lunch was actually fun. 

If I ignore all the times Mama questioned my peers about IBSA. Or the times when she interrogated them about their families, their careers, their hobbies, and even about me. I gave her a warning glance when she started quizzing them about my academic performance, and interests. Moms are created to embarrass their offspring. I'm certain of that now.

She was pleased to learn that Syra's Dad was a bureaucrat. By the time appetizers were whisked away by our attendants, she had discovered that we had mutual friends with Syra's fam. Pareeshae's smart dressing sense impressed her, and she asked my friend if she was interested in attending PFW with us. Thankfully, Shay was leaving for Islamabad the next morning. Lucky girl.

She was less than impressed when she learned about Azaan's military background. My mother is a staunch pro-democracy person, and she has little respect for the military because of their repeated coups throughout Pakistan's political history. I personally think that the army shouldn't be painted with a single brush. Yes, we have witnessed dictators, and Treasonous Martial Law administrators, but that doesn't erase the countless lives our army puts on the line, for the sake of our sovereignty and protection. Just one of many disagreements, that my mother and I share...

"My Dad is a retired colonel, and my Uncles, and Grandfather were all at one point in the Air-force or Marines." Azaan's prideful confession stunned me. He never spoke about this part of his life. 

"I see." Mama clipped out. "An army brat, are you then? How many siblings?"

I shoot her a cautious glance. She seems politely indifferent to her choice of words. 

"Yep. Army brat. And proud of it. I have three sisters, all younger than me." Azaan's smile suddenly seemed kind of forced. The steady chink of silverware against glass never stopped, as the rest of us silently saw the exchange. 

"None of your siblings going into military? Seems non-traditional..." Mama carefully sips her watermelon juice from her glass. Not a single smudge marred her perfect matte lip color. I guiltily wiped away the traces of Baby Lips left on the rim of my own glass of Coke.

"My sisters are all planning on serving  the army as doctors and engineers." Azaan carefully speared his quiche twice before moving it around his plate. He didn't seem too excited about the food. Strange.

"As an only brother, it must be hard, not following in your father's footsteps...."

I abandoned my war against lip color stains, to pay closer attention to the conversation at hand. Faris was scowling at his plate, as he played with his fruit knife. Syra and Daniyal seemed similarly uncomfortable.

'What?' I mouthed to Shay. She shrugged, puzzled.

"Yes... Yes, it's hard being an only brother." Azaan whispered quietly, before excusing himself for a visit to the restroom.

"I'll show you around." I noisily scrambled to my feet, dragging the chair back with a screech. Mama pursed her lips at that, turning towards Shay for more conversation.

Azaan was tugging his formal shirt collar loose in the living room when I found him.

"These monkey suits are suffocating." He scowled, messing up his starched collar.

"What happened back there?" I asked curiously. I have never seen Azaan Malik this far out of his element as he was back there. The only closest incident I remember is the time I told him about Ghani.

"Absolutely nothing. I was just feeling some after-effects of the blood episode." He pointed towards a leisurely strolling Chum Chum, "Is that your cat?"

His rapid change of subject didn't escape me.

"More like I'm his human...his name is Chum Chum. Like the sweet, y'know?" (The traditional Mithai (sweet) is fat, round, and white-like our cat)

"Dear lord he is fat. He must get teased so bad around the kitty parks." He bent down to scratch the feline's ears. "The other kitties probably call him Fatty McChubb Chubb!"

"Careful! He has claws, and he usually hates men..." I warn him uselessly, because Chum Chum is snuggling lazily around Azaan's hands.

That traitor! I grit my teeth when I recall the countless scratches and hisses I received as a kid when I initially tried befriending Chum Chum. At this moment, he is eyeing me maliciously with his bright green orbs.

"Well. Don't try to pick him up. He only lets Maria and Ruby pick him up."

"You mean, like this?" Azaan easily scooped him up in his arms, where the traitorous feline hummed and purred with contentment. I just gaped with righteous indignation.

"You little attention whore!" I hissed at Chum Chum, and in response, I kid you not, the cat stuck out his paw in a kitty-version of the middle finger.

"Wow. Did he just....?" Azaan asked me with disbelief.

"Yep. He just flipped me off. He does that quite often." I scowled back. "I'll just take you to the powder room then..."
........

"Darling, your friend Daniyal here, has a very interesting story about the annual concert." Mama's voice boomed out when we returned to the dining room for dessert.

"What?" I asked puzzled.   

"Uhh, the concert tickets are only for alumni and students....and uhh, Faris told me that last year, at Noori's concert, a few dozen tickets were sold in the black to non-IBSA, and a few unsavory people got through..."

Daniyal's admission sinks my heart. If I could telepathically tell him to drown in the gravy boat, at that instant, I totally would have done it. Mama is smirking triumphantly from her chair at the head of the long oak table. I can practically hear her ripping all of my plans to shreds.

"...so usually, we prefer it if girls stick together, and stay around their male friends for added security, you know..."

Azaan must have noted my wretched face, because he chimed in.

"Not that this will be an issue this year, Mrs. Hayat. Trust me, the security will be tighter, because we have specialized laser tickets that cannot be forged, so absolutely no hanky panky going on this time." He smiles assuredly, at me, "You girls can enjoy the concert with or without us." 

"I'd prefer it if she lets her guard accompany her..." Mama begins bitterly, chiding me with her eyes. I scowled at my Oreo dessert. Stabbing moodily at the pudding.

"...but Layla is adamant to do this by herself, and I'm not one to dictate my kids. So I'd really appreciate it, if all of you could keep an eye on her for me..."

My ears burned with humiliation at this. Nobody at the table was meeting my gaze now. I imagined what they must be thinking about me. How they must be laughing at my pathetic-ness inside. It's one thing to ask everyone to take care of each other, but entirely another to treat me like I'm a special-care kid who needs to hang onto her Mama's dress ribbons for protection. 

Azaan piped in then, with lavish praise for Ruby's famous brownie cookies. Others joined in a little too enthusiastically, with showers of praises and Thank-Yous aimed at my mother, and me. 

After being humiliated by my cat and mother, Ruby's good humor, and Maria's charming stories did serve as saving grace of my impromptu Lunch Party. By the time they planned to leave, Maria was on everyone's contact, and Facebook friend-list. Maria is extremely active on Social Media, and she had a blast discussing all sorts of political gossip with my friends. 

I think after the awkward meal, during which Mama got called into HQ for a crisis meeting, everyone relaxed a bit around me, and genuinely enjoyed the tour of our grounds and rec-center. The boys drooled over our 12-footer 3-D screen, and invited themselves over for future GTA wars, and Cricket match screenings. I was just happy to be around people who didn't let me feel awkward after all the drama they saw between me and Mama.

Pareeshae tugged me along under the pretense of checking out my room, while everyone else was occupied with our Air Hockey table. 

"Oh wow. This is amazing!" She blinked when I led her to my suite. She tapped the in-wall aquarium in my room, making Socrates and Plato scuttle away. All of my tropical fishes are named after philosophers. Mama believed that installing a water-based wall adornment, would help soothe my nightmares. It did work to some extent, I suppose, but then there were the flashbacks that came unbidden, near to the time of the crack of dawn...At those times, my brain has no idea that I'm safe in my bed, surrounded by a wall-aquarium.   

"Ya Allah, Your house is so distracting, MashAllah!" She mutters before yanking the room close. "I just couldn't wait to know, so I asked Syra, and she just texted me the story during dinner..."

"What story?"

"You know how Azaan got all weird when your Mom asked him about his siblings?"

"Yeah..."

"Well, it's because he lost one." Shay's hushed whisper confuses me.

"He lost what?"

"A brother, Layla! He lost a brother in the army." 

Author's Note:

I'm picking up speed with my updates! :D Yay!

Thank you so much for the patience, and praise! <3

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