Logan POV

"Patton can I talk to you?"  I asked him as he shut Virgil's door.  Roman was sitting against the wall next to the door.  He refused to go anywhere else until Virgil woke up. 

"Of course Lo."  Patton said cheerfully.  "But first I have to go to Remy and Emile that Virgil's home.  They'll be so happy to hear the news!" 

"Of course,"  I said.  "They will be very glad indeed." 

"Meet me in my room in like fifteen minutes than."  Patton told me before leaving for the trait complex.

Patton POV
I was practically bouncing in excitement as I knocked on Remy's door. 

Emile answered after a while.  I smiled brightly at him, earning a confused look from him. 

"VIRGIL'S BACK."  I yelled, too happy to contain my excitement. 

"Wait what-oh my goodness your serious?"  Emile asked, covering his mouth as tears filled his eyes. 

"Virgil's back?"  Came a voice from inside the room.  Emile opened he door further and pulled me into the room. 

Remy was sitting on the bed.  Hope and disbelief written all over his face. 

"Yes, Logan figured out the spell to free Virgil."  I told them.  "He's home right now. He got kinda really hurt because Ignorance decided to slit open his chest with a sword.  But he's okay.  He's recovering right now." 

"Ignorance did WHAT?!"  Screamed Emile.  An angry protectiveness flared in his eyes. 

"Virgil's okay now, so don't worry."  I told him with a gentle laugh.  "Logan stitched him up.  He's home now, resting.  He's safe." 

"I'm glad to hear that."  Remy said, obviously in shock.

"I'm so happy to hear that!"  Emile said, obviously way more excited than Remy.  Which was odd. 

"How about you guys come over tomorrow and you can see him."  I suggested. 

"Sounds like a good idea."  Emile said, agreeing with me.  "Remy?" 

"Yeah, I'd love to see Virgil tomorrow."  He said, a light smile on his face. 

"Okay I have to go, I'll see you two tomorrow!"  I said, waving bye to them. 

Logan POV
I paced around Patton's room, awaiting his return. I don't know what I'm going to say to him. My mind is in a jumbled mess.

Do I apologize for being a horrible boyfriend? Do I confront him about the cuts on his wrist?
God I don't understand emotions. What am I supposed to do here?!

The door opened, causing me to jump a bit. Patton shut the door and turned to me with a large smile.

I sat down on his bed and patted the spot next to me. Patton headed over and sat down next to me.

"We need to talk Patton." I said. Patton's smile fell and fear filled his eyes.

"Before you jump to any conclusions," I said, trying to ease his concern. "I am not breaking up with you." I held his hands tightly in my own, placing them between us.

Patton let out a sigh of relief and smiled at me. He squeezed my hand gently.

"So what's bothering you Logie?" He asked in concern.

"There is nothing upsetting me, I do not require any help as of right now." I told him, getting a confused look from him. "The one that needs help is you."

Instantly, fear filled Patton's eyes. I guessed he knew what I was talking about.

"I...I don't know what your talking about." Patton said quickly, refusing to look me in the eyes.

"Don't lie to me Patton." I said gently. "I'm here to help you. I'm not angry. I just want you to be okay."

Patton laughed awkwardly, pulling his hands out of mine. He was forcing a smile but tears were gathering in his eyes.

"I don't understand." He told me, trying to act oblivious. "There's nothing bothering me right now." 

"Let me see your wrists than."

"No!" Patton yelled instantly, wrapping his arms tightly around himself.

"Patton..."

"Nope! There's nothing wrong with me Logan! I'm just happy pappy Patton. No sadness here!"

"Falsehood." I said sternly. Patton looked up at me, tears starting to trail down his cheeks. I moved Patton so that his back was against my chest. He broke out into sobs.

I hugged him tightly. I'm such a horrible boyfriend for not doing anything when I first noticed. 

Slowly I moved my hands down from Patton's hands and rested them on his wrists.  His flinch in pain was all I needed for confirmation.  Well, I still wanted to see them to confirm my worst fears.

"May I?"  I asked quietly.  I wouldn't pull down the hoodie sleeves if Patton wasn't okay with it.  Patton nodded his head 'yes'. 

I gently kissed the top of Patton's head before pulling the hoodie sleeves down.  I tried to hold back a gasp when I saw his wrists.  I squeezed my eyes shut, burying my face in his hair. 

I felt tears fill my eyes.  I felt some sort of pain in my chest.  Why would Patton would resort to something as horrible as this?  I moved my head, forcing myself to look at the cuts.

There were too many cuts to count.  All deep and bloody.  Down both of his wrists.  I felt my heart drop, figuratively, in horrible sadness.

"Oh Pat..."  I whispered.  Patton started sobbing heavily again.  I knew I upset him with my reaction. 

I quickly trailed kisses down his head and his cheek.  I rocked back in forth, mumbling  words of praise and how much I loved him. 

"I love you so much Patton.  Please don't hurt yourself.  You don't have to do this.  I'm so sorry I wasn't there.  Please never do this.  I love you.  I can't loose you." 

I'm so disappointed in myself that I hadn't gotten my head out of ass, figuratively, and realized how much Patton was actually hurting. 

I'm a horrible boyfriend for not helping him.  He's my boyfriend.  Forget my work.  Patton should be my priority.  Making sure that he's happy and safe should come before all to me. 

I vow from now on to stop putting my work above Patton's feelings.

I'm more of an idiot for not doing anything when I first noticed than when I couldn't figure out how to free Virgil.  Stupid emotions I don't understand. 

"Promise me that you'll come to me any time you feel like hurting yourself."  I begged.  "Please." 

"I will."  He said quietly, his voice muffled by his tears.  We stayed like that for a while.  Me holding tightly to Patton while he cried. 

Once he calmed down a bit, I pulled Patton's hoodie off of him.  I moved Patton so that he was sitting next to me on the bed. 

I kissed him gently.  Patton kissed back, crying into the kiss.  I pulled away, stopping to press kisses on his nose and forehead. 

"I'll be right back."  I told him.  I got out of his bed and headed out of his room. 

Instantly, my mind started working.  Patton is inflicting self harm upon himself.  And obviously isn't taking care of himself.  The evidence being how none of the cuts are cleaned or bandaged. 

Also based on how skinny Patton seems to be now.  He seems to not be eating too.  I could see almost every bone in his arms. 

Horrible fear and sadness filled me.  I'm such a horrible boyfriend for not helping Patton.  Why did I ever think that Patton would be okay?!  He lost Virgil too...and Virgil was like a son to him.  I shouldn't have pushed him away to focus on my work.  All that did was obviously hurt Patton very badly. 

I opened my room and headed to the bathroom.  I grabbed the special first aid kit I had created specifically for occurrences like this. 

I had put it together after Virgil attempted suicide, for whenever he would cut himself.  I never would have guessed I would need it for Patton. 

I grabbed it and headed downstairs.  I walked into the kitchen. 

My eyes glanced over all the different pastries setting on the island.  I know Patton stress bakes, but this is ridiculous. 

I grabbed plate and set a few cookies on it.  Than I looked in the fridge for some more nutritious foods. 

Considering it was obvious that Patton was starving himself for some reason, he needs to work on starting to eat again slowly. 

He needs to pace himself or he'll get sick.  I thought about what could make Patton turn to something like self harm or starvation. 

Well I guess this is all my fault. 

I was the one that pushed him away.  I was the one that ignored his feelings.  I was the one that didn't care when he came crying to me about what happened.  I was the one that didn't do anything when I started noticing the cuts. 

I'm a horrible boyfriend.  I don't deserve Patton. 

I grabbed a bottle of water, setting it angrily on the counter.  I worked on slicing up an apple to distract myself from my thoughts.  I quickly made a piece of toast, refraining from adding butter. 

I know Patton prefers buttered toast, but if my calculations are correct that he'd been starving himself since Virgil disappeared, he'll only upset his stomach by eating so much.

I headed over to the tv and started digging through all the dvds.  Eventually I found the Winnie the Pooh dvd.  I grabbed it and added it the pile of things I was gathering. 

I quickly headed back upstairs to Patton.  Before reaching his room, I had an idea.  I stopped in my room and grabbed my unicorn onesie and pajamas. 

I headed back towards Patton's room.  I opened the door to see Patton sitting on the bed, trying to wipe his tears away. 

I shut the door.  I quickly walked over to him and gently kissed his head again. 

I sat the plate of food down on the bedside table.  I headed over to the tv and started Winnie the Pooh.  I paused it and headed back to Patton. 

I grabbed the first aid kit and opened it.  I sat down next to Patton and set the kit in my lap. 

I grabbed Patton's arm gently and started working on cleaning out the cuts.  Patton winced a few times in pain, causing me to kiss him to distract him. 

We stayed silent throughout the process.  I honestly didn't know what to say.  It hurts knowing that someone you loved honestly more than yourself, hurts themself.  That they hate themselves while you see them as the most amazing person in the world.

It's hard knowing you'd give anything to protect that person, only to learn you have to protect them from their own mind.  That they mean the world to you, and they don't even want to be in this world anymore.

I finished wrapping his wrists in bandages.  Than I kissed both wrists 'to make them feel better', knowing that despite how illogical it was, it would make Patton at least a little happy.  Patton smiled gently, appreciating that I was trying.

I stood up and walked over to his dresser.  I grabbed his cat onesie and handed it to him.  Patton smiled gently up at me through his tears. 

I could tell he was grateful.  I needed to do everything I could to make up for the month that I ignored him.  It's all my fault he hurt himself.  I should've been there for him. 

Patton quickly stripped down to his boxers and pulled his pajamas on and slipped into his onesie within seconds with eased practice. 

I however took my time in changing into my pajamas.  I pulled on the onesie and sat down on the bed next to Patton. 

"Patton,"  I said, getting his attention.  "I'm so sorry.  For everything.  For putting my work above you and your feelings.  For ignoring you.  For not helping you.  For not realizing how much you were suffering.  I was a horrible boyfriend." 

Patton stopped my rambling by giving me a deep kiss.  I kissed back, hoping this meant he didn't hate me. 

"It's okay Logie."  He mumbled when he pulled away.  "I understand, I forgive you.  I'm just glad your back now." 

"I'm not leaving again. You should be my priority.  Always, no matter what."  I promised. 

Patton thanked me and kissed me again.  I smiled a little, hoping things were finally looking up for all of us now. 

"Before we watch the movie,"  I said, grabbing the plate of food.  "You need to eat something."

"I'm not hungry."  He lied, looking uneasily at the food. 

"Don't lie to me Patton, I can tell your starving yourself."  I said gently.  Patton whimpered and hung his head in shame.  "Do you mind telling me why?" 

Patton stayed silent for a bit.  He was probably having some sort of internal combat with himself over if he should explain himself or not. 

"I'm fat."  He mumbled, a few tears sliding down his cheeks.  I frowned, and reached over to wipe all his tears away. 

"No your not,"  I argued.  "You are beautiful and amazing in every way.  You are not fat.  You do not have to starve yourself.  You will always be beautiful to me." 

"Maybe..."  He mumbled.  I could tell it would take a lot of time and work to get Patton back into a happier mindset.  But I was willing to work to make sure Patton never felt like this again. 

"Please, for me, try to eat something."  I begged him, motioning towards the plate.  Patton's stomach growled, causing him to slowly reach for the piece of toast. 

He munched on it.  I couldn't help but smile.  I was proud of him for being able to do that.  Most people wouldn't be able to. 

Patton finished the toast and pushed the plate back to me.  He shook his head.

"Thats enough."  He mumbled, not making eye contact again.  I kissed his forehead and sat the plate on the bedside table. 

It's good enough for now.  We'll have to work on that later in the day.  At least he ate the toast, that's good progress. 

I laid down on the bed and pulled Patton with me.  Patton curled up against me, resting his head on my chest.  I wrapped an arm around him before starting the movie. 

I could tell Patton was smiling a little bit as the movie continued.  Patton's slight happiness made me happy. 

After a while, Patton fell asleep.  I looked down at him.  He looked adorable, laying there, pressed up against my side.  He was holding tightly to a dog stuffed animal. 

I kissed the top of his head and gently pulled his glasses off.  I put them on the bedside table along with my glasses.

I turned off the tv and the light.  I laid down completely and curled up around Patton.  I wrapped my arms tightly around him. 

I will make sure that from now on, Patton never feels like that ever again. 

I closed my eyes and let sleep drag me away.