Adam woke out of a dead sleep surrounded by Jacob, Anna and Hazel. They were dozing, it was mid-way through the day and from the TubeTube playlist playing they must have been watching their new favorite show. It was about the underground hidden bunkers they kept finding beneath malls.

On the TV, they were showing a hospital room complete with IV units and oxygen. He stopped for a moment, fascinated.

Adam felt pressure. It wasn't painful, the pressure, but it was enough to make him feel like he was being kicked in the stomach but from the top. He pressed his fingers against the skin that protected his next child from the outside world and pushed curiously. As the pressure went away, so did the hardness.

He wiggled out of the pile, relieved that they snuggled together and kept sleeping. His partners were undoubtedly tired, but Jacob had been helping out a bit more this pregnancy as their kids started to play together. His children were mild mannered, not to say the Throuple's weren't, but Juniper had Only Child Syndrome even with her brother around because he was so low maintenance. This next baby would be a learning curve for her as she learned the world didn't revolve around her.

He stretched his arms above his head and glanced at his reflection in the basement bathroom mirror. The baby had dropped two weeks ago so he was carrying lower now. The idea of a new child made him smile a bit. "You're the last one," He told his bump. "I'm serious this time."

He sighed, no cute little kicks to affirm he was heard. After pacing for a bit the pressure came back enough to make him break out in a minor sweat. "Ugh, I fucking hate Braxton-Hicks!"

Jacob awoke immediately being the least exhausted and smiled weakly as he checked the nap camera. He'd rigged it with Peridot so the feed would come to the TV on the 11th channel. "No one's awake yet. Let's get you some wa—," He ducked the pillow and held up his hands. "Let's get you some milk and water." He nudged everyone else awake too, naps were going to be ending soon anyhow with the miracle of having their children on strictly the same nap cycle.

Adam sighed and begun the slow trip up the stairs, hoping and praying that these contractions would be the ones. Baby was around a week late and the doctors wouldn't induce labor for another few days. They did say eating spicy foods, curb walking and stair trips would help even though Hazel really hated having him on any kind of elevated surface since he'd started to round out again. He thought it was really nice that though they hadn't been trying, he still got to have another baby.

"What a perfect polycule," He mused to himself as he took a break halfway up the stairs to breathe. Baby moved a bit and he grunted in confusion, there was a tightness again when he patted his belly.

Jacob chuckled up at him. "I agree, this is a perfect polycule. Or at least very close." He escorted him the rest of the way up the stairs and smiled bigger, Adam was mighty fetching to see pregnant even if he was ready to be done. Somehow he still carried himself in a masculine way despite the constant misgendering he got from being full of baby. The initial hatred of being pregnant was relieved a bit since Asher was born and then Juniper. Now he was kind of jaded to the extreme while pregnant and Jacob was happy he stopped caring.

But... lately Jacob was trying not to think about the fact that they were too late to have a baby together. Maybe it was a selfish endeavor that would cause more trouble than it was worth, maybe the universe had done this to them on purpose. They were already so emotionally close, he tried to tell himself he didn't need the extra connection and that he was a grownup who could get over it. Besides, they were both immortal now for pretty certain. He'd have him for the rest of the universe's life.

Adam got to the top of the stairs and cried out in pain. "Oh shit! Shit, shit, shit!"

Now everyone was running up the stairs and Jacob watched as Adam went pale and dizzy in Anna's arms. "Adam? Is baby coming?"

He broke out into a sweat. "A-actually—," His water broke and the next contraction scream was muffled in his arm. "S-someone— I-I think we need Lion!"

Steven started calling all of their parents and babysitters as Connie whistled for the beast. "How close are the contractions?" She asked professionally. "Are they 5-1-1, yet?"

Adam laughed bitterly and growled. "Right on top of each o— each other! Out of nowhere!"

His legs gave out and Hazel handed him to a stunned Jacob so he could carry him. "We're going to get baby bags! Just hold him for me."

Jacob nodded and looked down at the already sweaty father to be. "Ready for la maise?"

Adam gritted his teeth and flipped him off. "I n-need to hold someone's hand! Oh fuck all, son of a cunt on a fucking Friday!"

Jasmin giggled tensely and held his hand. "Deep breathing, Daddy. You got this!" Then she yelped in pain. "Oh got a very strong grip, that's a-awesome!" Clearly she was trying to hide her wince but nodded bravely at Jacob as they started to breathe with him and Alex timed the contractions.

Lion tore through the portal and padded right up to them but Hazel and Anna weren't there yet.

Adam looked around for them and choked up. "I'm scared. P-put me down!"

Connie helped set him down and walk him to Lion. His head lolled back and he grunted hard as he got into a squat leaning against the beast. "I-I gotta push!" He swallowed and growled hard. "My body is telling me to push!"

"A-Adam, nononono!" Steven protested, coming to aide with the phone tucked to his ear on his shoulder as the grandparents said they'd be on the way soon. "Don't push!"

Adam shook his head hard and dropped a hand down his pants to check. "G-guys, I think I need someone to check me now!"

Connie grabbed the gloves for Alex and after a quick chat with Hazel and Anna to fill them in, they decided to call an ambulance. There was no way Lion would be useful this particular time when Adam seemed to think baby was going to come out right there in the commons living room.

They got him laying down with his legs spread and Alex cracked his neck. "Alright, let's see if I'm going to deliver yet another fucking baby for you baby hoarders." He was careful but Adam still had to be held down because he was a kicker like no one's business, he hated being touched there sometimes and he was in so much terrible pain.

Alex was careful as he pushed two fingers in gently. "Someone get him some ice, I need every towel we own for under him, a bucket of water and for the love of god someone calm him down!" He ordered as he dodged a foot that would've kicked his head clean off.

Adam screamed he was scared and started to sob. His Asher had taken 24 hours or so to finally come, he'd nearly died with Juniper when he was struck with preeclampsia (Connie suspected it had something to do with his living status and slow heartbeat) but this baby was skipping all of the stages he thought he was used to. There was no build up, he realized he was missing it a little. Was something wrong again?

Hazel and Anna were trying to encourage him but he couldn't seem to calm down, he was seriously frightened especially with his own children and extended children so close by probably listening to him uncontrollably cry out. He was always so afraid of traumatizing them, what if this was going to do that?

Lucky poked her head out after her father and Steven grinned at his pride and joy, his first baby now nearly 10. "Hold the fort down, kiddo." She nodded curtly and disappeared inside to gather his kids and exit out the front door to grab the rest. His heart throbbed, she looked just like her mother in that moment especially. He returned to Alex with everything he'd asked and Connie came with a damp towel to put across Adam's forehead. "How's it looking, Alex?"

Alex pulled his hand out and blew out a breath. "I guess we're doing this now, cause that's a head way up there!" He exclaimed in surprise. "Adam, this next contraction is gonna be fast so I need you to push when I tell you to and stop when I tell you to, okay?"

He placed a hand on his stomach and Hazel nearly got knocked out by the force of his kick. "Adam, you're gonna be okay! The ambulance is coming, baby. We're gonna have a newborn soon!"

Anna smiled at her Adam. "Thank you, Seahorse Daddy. I know this sucks but we're going to have a gorgeous baby and it's all your hard work. We love you."

He whined but nodded at them both to express what he couldn't say. Alex counted him in and he pushed with everything he had until he was nauseous. "Alex!"

Alex frantically grabbed more towels to put under him and ushered the other two parents over as a siren was heard in the background. "Alright, we need all hands on deck cause this next one might be it!"

Steven kissed Adam's forehead to soothe a bit of pain. "Are you ready?"

Adam nodded tearfully. "I'm ready." They clasped hands and Adam got halfway through the push before he could feel the Ring of Fire as baby started to make their way into the world. "Fuck! One more push, I'm just going for it!"

Alex demanded he wait but it was no use, Adam bared down and the sirens became deafening, Hazel cheered and Anna started to cry and everything got loud and terrifying and deafening and then—

A gasp of relief.

Silence.

Crying. A soft cry filled the room, immediately followed by cheering.

"It's a boy!" Alex sobbed through tears. "It's a healthy looking baby boy with a lot of hair!"

Connie jogged in with the paramedics, they took vitals and lifted Adam onto a stretcher as the rest of the parents got their bags too.  They whisked them all away after a quick clean up.

Everyone was crying and smiling and praising the stars for the newest addition to their family, it was so wonderful to have another newborn when it felt like it had been so long! They all told Adam through his post labor contractions that they were going to love the hell out of this final baby and he smiled big.

When they got to the hospital the nurse told them both were coming down from the strenuous labor but ready to be seen, so they quietly bustled in to find Adam relaxing with his eyes closed. "It's apparently called precipitous labor, and we're extremely lucky to be alive." He smiled at them all knowingly. "Anna named Asher, Hazel named Juniper, but I'll let you guys name this little miracle too. He's really sweet and I already love him so much."

They cooed and awe'd at the dark hair beauty and took turns holding him. He really was quite relaxed, had a healthy flush and tons of black hair. He was downright adorable.

Jasmin got to snuggle him close and squealed softly. "He's so cute! Oh my stars you got a head of messy hair like your daddy and brother! You do!"

Jacob chuckled and kissed her temple. "Just one more and I'll leave you alone."

They all started quietly protesting (especially Steven) that it wasn't fair if they were done and Jacob got to keep going so he begrudgingly held the baby to himself. "Fine, I'm stealing this one then," He laughed.

The baby cooed and under the light he got a good look at him. His heart was already head over heels for this tiny being, there was an instant connection. He had to laugh again and scold Adam, "Let someone else have a go at genes, luv. This kid is just another you."

Hazel giggled and flipped his dreads. "Jokes on you caucasian folk, my Juni-bopper was essentially immediately getting my genes with my skin tone. And she's so pretty just like her Daddy." He wiggled his fingers to hold his new son and sighed happily. "What a beautiful baby boy." The baby made a little sound of content and Hazel lit up the room with his glow. "It's nice to finally meet you. You were comfy in there, huh?"

Anna rested her head on his shoulder to rub her fingers over his little head. "He's perfect."

And then he opened his eyes.

They stared in shock for a long moment until Anna burst into tearful laughter and exclaimed, "Oh my stars, you're knockout handsome with those eyes!"

Adam snorted from the bed. "Mine?"

They both didn't even hear him at first. Hazel kissed the baby's forehead proudly. "Nope, they're green. I dub thee: Jack of all trades." He chuckled at his own joke. "Jack for short."

There was a deeply shocked silence for a very long while before Adam sat up faster than he should to reach for the baby and see. "What the fuck," He whispered. "We don't have green eyes in our family. And it's not like I hang out with other people that can get me pregnant." A few giggles filled the room but the anticipation was killing them. "I-
How—?"

Adam went paler than normal as Jack looked up to give a sleepy, gassy smile to his father. "Jack. That's... a good name for you."

Jacob sailed out the door before anyone could even look at him.

They were so ecstatic and awed they didn't even notice at first, then Connie turned to look at him. "...Where's Jacob?"

*

Anna came into the commons crying along with baby Jack. "S-sorry Connie, I'm still making more milk but he's so hungry..." She broke down and Connie ushered them both over tenderly.

She cradled Jack and popped out a tit. Instantly Jack latched on and they waited with bated breath to see if he would reject the milk. After five minutes they chuckled at how cute he was and Anna burped him. Then Connie switched to the other side and got to burp him.

For a second, Connie's eyes went misty. "I sometimes think he loves us too already. He's such an easy baby."

Anna knew why she was crying and she looked down at him tearing up for the same reason. "He's been an absolute angel from the day he was born. He's a perfect little guy."

They snuggled him and played with him together, sometimes sharing a kiss to show three month old Jack what love looked like. Sometimes he'd even give them both a baby smile and they'd coo over him like he was the greatest little being to ever exist.

All of the kids loved Jack and would fight over him to the point where parents had to get involved. This baby was generally adored, though the kids would occasionally get a look on their face when looking at him, and then his parents.

Cosmo pulled Steven aside one day and crossed his arms. "I have a question."

Steven, oblivious, mirrored his body language. "Shoot. What's up, Cos?"

"So maybe this is inappropriate to ask but..." Cosmo glanced away from his father and mumbled, "Jack doesn't make sense to me."

His father's heart went racing but he tried to laugh it off. "What?"

His son sighed and shook his head. "Never mind, it's probably stupid."

Daisy had apparently asked Connie the same thing, and despite his high preference for staying out of polycule drama that wasn't his, Steven realized just how intertwined he and Connie were with this. If Adams polycule's kids and Jacob and Jasmin's kids felt they couldn't ask their parents, it meant he and Connie had to step up somehow.

But how could he even begin to describe that Jack probably wasn't supposed to happen, but also that he wasn't a mistake and they loved him? And was it even in their place to say anything, even if they hated lying to their children?

Steven and Hazel would take shifts together with Jack every few days when they were partner switching. To combat having less time to spend together, they'd do a partner swap and for a few days they'd have their other partners around the house to raise babies. At first it felt like it was impossible with clingy babies but eventually, like always, they found an incredible rhythm. The kids when they were babies eventually recognized all of them and all of their smells, Jack had chest bonded with all the dads for skin to skin contact, the mommies breastfed and spoiled him rotten as his freckles started to officially appear.

The doctors said it was a genetic abnormality but they knew better. But Daddy #2 hadn't spoken a word and chose instead going silent and avoidant all the time. He was getting sick a lot, he'd even had a second anxiety seizure and was rushed to the ER. They put him on medicine for it but he was still sluggish and less alert.

Still, when Jack stuck his tongue out at them and made a cute face, they took a million pictures.

*

The polycule started purposely putting the two together to talk it out. It felt very deliberate and somehow cruel.

Adam and Jacob would sometimes watch five month old Jack swat at the toys above him in the bouncer and would think, "Holy shit, this baby is ours."

It was a firework display of feelings: joy, fear, longing, anxiety, sadness, supreme satisfaction. There was no satisfaction they'd ever felt that was more intense than this.  The feelings whirled around until it created a divide that would only close if they confessed to their secret.

All they wanted was to collapse into each other's arms and cry, but it felt like they couldn't do that without rocking the boat too much. The words were stuck.

They'd been fucking to breed, that was exactly how they'd made Jack and they knew it. But Adam had been on birth control so while they hadn't thought they could, they still tried, and they shouldn't have let the need to have children together surpass having a conversation.

And what a little creature they'd made. He had jet black hair, and like Jacob's it was perpetually messy and thick. His eyes were starkly green, but noticeably paler than Jacob's hazel to green variation. He wasn't as pale as Adam by any means, and as his freckles darkened he really started to look like a perfect combination of both. Sometimes he'd smile and Jacob would start getting numbness and tingling in his arm because he was looking at another clone of himself that wasn't supposed to exist yet. Or occasionally he'd make a deadpan face and Adam would smile his pain, because just a second ago he looked like his other father and now he looked more like him. They couldn't even be excited or share it with each other. Before they'd known Jack was theirs, they'd joked about Adam having heartburn meant he was gonna have a kid with a lot of hair like his daddy.

He did, just not the dad they'd been thinking.

Jack looked like a baby Liam, but more human. Liam had a distinctly non human aura, like a sentient werecat, but Jack's was pure. Every cry or giggle or toot was drenched in innocence. They forgave Jack for everything, for he did not know what he did.

But they did.

*

Steven laughed at a six month old Jack bouncing while holding his pants in tight fists. He was definitely dancing, he liked their music.

Currently they had Jacob's biggest hit playing, Slow Dancing In The Dark, possibly the saddest song about sex any of them had ever heard. The music video still haunted Steven sometimes. But to babies it meant nothing but beautiful harmonies and pretty tinking sounds from the piano in the forefront.

So Steven picked him up with gentle hands and kissed his cheek, pleased when he held him in place to stay pressed against him. Jack loved kisses, he was spoiled rotten. They swayed to the music and Steven sang to him to spoil him even more with attention.  Jack eventually rested in the crook of his neck with a handful of his hair to teethe on and listen, and Steven felt him sigh contentedly against his shoulder.

He loved this baby, truth be told. He loved all of his children and extended children but this baby felt as if he was made for the love of the polycule in general. Jacob and Adam were genetically genius to make a baby between their features and stunning looks, and this baby was no different.

Jack was so sweet. He was cooing at his singing, gurgling his praise and even giggling a little. He moved him to cradle so he could see him and smiled.

Hazel poked his head into the basement and grinned. "Slow dancing with baby Jack?"

Steven nodded. "I have slow songs on now, I think he likes these ones."

The man's eyes went to the radio and he grew downcast. "This one broke my heart. I have a baby harness though, so that makes it better."

They strapped him up and put Jack in it so they could slow dance together, with Jack right in the middle squealing at the both of them.

*

Jasmin rocked a sick ten month old Jack and turned to see Jacob standing, holding their last newborn baby Astro while he slept and Jacob stared off into the distance and looking anywhere but at them. He'd been like that since Jack was born, it made her pregnancy with Astro a little more stressful than she would've liked. "Jacob—,"

He surged for her and kissed all over her face. "You know I love you, don't you?" He murmured achingly. "You know I love you so much, Jasmin. I love being married to you and I love you, you know that right? You know that I mean that?"

Talking to her husband was like talking to a broken record lately. She felt like every other sentence was him reassuring her when she didn't need the validation. He made it obvious he did all the damn time, even if he was a shell lately. She missed her husband's joy, not his love. "Of course I knew that." His eyes grew misty and he started shaking his head rapidly, he was just going to say the same thing all over again in a different order. "Jacob, I'm not afraid you don't, okay?" Jasmin stressed a bit louder. "I'm not going to leave you, ever, for any reason. I just wanna know what's going on..." She took in the eyes that hadn't brightened with genuine silliness in a very long time. "I'm so worried about you. Please just tell me what's wrong."

He opened his mouth, a dam seemingly about to erupt but Jack started to cry and he backed away from him. It was clear to see how visible his hurt was, he wore it every day. Her Jacob was hurting over this baby in particular, she could tell he wanted to hold him all the time so badly. But it was like he'd been rendered voiceless as he made his way to the nursery to put Astro down, and out the front door.

He was at the rage room a lot lately. Jasmin checked their bank cards and found out about it a month after Jack was born. Jacob was back to having rampages but away from everyone else. She worried he was afraid of himself, that maybe he was afraid he'd hurt the baby or himself.

Jacob even seemed suicidal.

One evening she had been wandering around late at night after the kids were asleep and found him in Astro's nursery watching him sleep. A strike of anxiety went through her, she didn't know what was going through his head.

He sighed and buried his head in his hands, then pulling at his hair until he grunted with pain. "I'm so sorry you haven't seen me be a good father yet. I'm so stressed and there's no one I can talk to. I—," He hesitated and let out a shaky breath. "I promise I didn't make you to right a wrong. I didn't know! It seemed like I did but I didn't, how do I explain that to anyone?"

He stood and Jasmin tensed against the wall, slowly making her way back to their bedroom.

But she did hear him crying over and over under his breath, "I didn't know."

She cried holding Jack sometimes and even when he stopped to stare up at her in confusion and Alex took him away to bring him to Adam, she continued to cry.

Jasmin realized she was depressed over her husband's grief, but she'd pull herself together after the crying spells and parent as hard as she could while supporting his need for short five minute breaks.

*

"And many more!"

Jack clapped and squealed at the beautiful harmony they achieved, it probably sounded like a big hug from all of his parents with the way he screeched so happily.

His cheeks were fat, his thighs and arms were fat. Jack was a chubby one year old today, and they were anticipating his first steps with how close he'd gotten a few times.

Alex and Jasmin took millions of pictures of them all feeding him frosting and cake, of Jack smearing it all over his face and hair. The jungle theme was stupid adorable, and Jack was the little lion of a baby at the center. He loved lions, in fact he loved Lion so much he'd crawl after him and tug on his mane when in optimal position just so he could give him a kiss. Lion liked him too, he licked him when he thought no one was looking and carried him around like a cub by his onesie. He was incredibly gentle with all of their kids but he'd only curl up around Steven's kids, Leo, Astro and Jack to sleep because the rest were rowdy, silly bunch.

The kids cheered for Jack and joined the festivities of present opening, but the elephant in the room was growing with every passing second. All of the children were more old enough to be aware something was amiss with Jack, and with Jacob. His mentally ill lapse was extremely hard not to notice. Most of them couldn't remember the last time he'd made a joke or even laughed sincerely.

Steven kept glancing to Adam in anticipation. Adam seemed less upset about Jack. He was ready to defend them, in fact Adam had been talking about the side effects he was experiencing from restarting birth control and testosterone again before Jack was conceived. Jacob hadn't done it on purpose, neither of them had. Steven would immediately trust them when they told them Jack was a happy whoops.

Anna smiled encouragingly at Adam, who was far more quiet than usual. He would mask when acknowledged but when he wasn't talking, he looked horribly depressed and anxious. Sometimes his lips would part like he was about to say something, but nothing came out.

Steven switched to watching his emotionally intelligent, brilliant boyfriend Jacob instead. He was clearly happy to have an excuse to hold Jack but his smile was so weak one couldn't even call it that. He looked like he was in pain, especially when he sat Jack on the table in front of him to stare at and play with him. Patty cake was Jacks favorite so he laughed and babbled at him but Jacob barely smiled, it seemed he was rendered broken over this. Steven didn't even remember the last time he'd seen Jacob truly happy.

After kids went to bed and decorations were down, Steven hesitated for a moment longer to see, to hope they'd clasp hands and reveal the world's worst kept secret. "Well... that's everything..." He prompted.

Adam nodded listlessly. "Thank you." Steven caught his eyes flicker to Jacob's before he scowled at the floor. "I'm going outside. Need a detox from people for a bit."

He departed and Jasmin sent Steven a look of camaraderie. "It was a fun party, but any notes? Or additional things?"

Steven could barely find humor in Hazel facepalming to hide a laugh. He was being really cool about this, he was a little proud of him.

He found solace in catching Jacob's eyes. He begged with every iota of his being, "Please just say it, I promise no one is going to be mad! Just say it! Say it!"

Jacob swallowed audibly and his eyes fell shut in pain. He shut off entirely and walked into his house silently.

And that's when the hope turned to resentment.

*

It didn't take long for shit to hit the fan after that.

When Jack took his first steps, it was to Jacob, who'd been texting on his phone at the time completely disassociated. Jack gasped and lurched forward to grab onto his jeans and smile big as the ones who caught it cheered and praised him.

At first Connie watched Jacob look vastly overjoyed for the first time in a year and a month. He chuckled and clapped for him too, and that made Jack excited enough to look up at him and cry, "Dada!"

Thank the stars no other kids were home at the time. Jacob's face went so pale it was practically a medical emergency. He froze in place, he knew everyone was staring at him and he must have known it was far too late to reveal anything without arguing.

Hazel had enough. This gorgeous and adorable baby was waiting for Jacob to pick him up and instead Jacob had his face buried in his hands. "Really? You're not going to respond to your son?"

The tension was so thick Connie would have broken her sword cutting through it.

"Technically he's mine," Adam muttered darkly. "My Jack."

Alex spoke his mind harshly only to make someone boil over. He knew what this was: a fight waiting to happen and if it didn't happen now it never would. If it never did, they may as well part ways now. "Well he's got your hair but my husband freckles and eyes so while you're absolutely right, we know damn well the kid has two fathers, not one."

"Well, he's definitely not mixed," Anna input a little cynically. "And I don't have green eyes."

Eyes turned to Steven for some reason and he scoffed his annoyance awkwardly. "Are you actually fucking kidding me? Be serious, do better."

Jasmin tossed him a grateful look and Steven blew out a low breath. It was going well enough so she whispered, "I just don't think it's fair to anyone's sanity to pretend we don't know what's going on anymore."

Jacob picked up Jack and kissed his cheek. "I'm so sorry." He propped him up on a hip and handed him to Adam. "I need a breather."

Hazel got in his way. "So it was on purpose," He accused with a growing chilly smile as Jacob dropped his head to shake it at the floor. "How am I supposed to believe that when you can't even look me in my face?!"

"It wasn't on purpose!" Jacob snapped, jabbing a finger in his face. "And don't you fucking dare try to intimidate me into lying just so you can feel better about it."

Anna and Jasmin tried to get between them but both were grabbed as the argument escalated quickly and Hazel reached the very peak of his rage. "And how do you think I felt trying to pretend this baby is mine when he's yours and he clearly loves you so fucking much?!"

"No one EVER said we had to pretend! At least you got to spend time with him!" Jacob's face went bright red with rage and they knew that was it, he had reached his emotional limit. "I had to stand by and feel guilty every time someone so much as looked at him. I HAD TO WATCH HIM GROW UP WITHOUT ME!"

Hazel laughed and rolled his eyes. "But you could've been there if you didn't do it on purpose. You got my husband pregnant on the DL and you fucking meant to." When Jacob didn't respond at first he threw his head back. "Unbe-fucking-lievable. This is insanity. You be the easiest going guy in the world and the person you expect to fuck you over the least, does."

Jacob blinked and gave Hazel a sigh as his eyes welled. "Right. After all of the trust I put in you in particular, how could I possibly expect you to trust me?" He scoffed and shook off the hurt to just go numb but Hazel didn't move. "Get the hell out of my way."

Anna clapped her hands to get their attention. "Both of you knock it off! We already knew, we're not stupid! We knew the whole time."

"I mean, if he doesn't want Jack," Hazel finished with a shrug. "Someone's gotta step up."

Jacob clenched his fists and loosened his knees. Anyone who knew him would've seen that and stopped what was coming before it happened, but everyone was so emotional and horrified they missed it. "That's a low blow, even for you."

No one saw it coming when Hazel said, "Watch me go lower," and decked Jacob square in the face.

Jasmin screamed and Alex grabbed her to yank back as the available men cleared the girls away.

Adam held a crying Jack as they both sobbed. He started to panic, there was nothing he could say or do but cry, "Stop it! Please don't hurt each other! I'm sorry!"

Jacob took the hit but it clearly pissed him off. A single hit to Hazels side had the giant grabbing his arm to break it.

Steven, a man of infinite kindness and grace, ripped them apart and then pushed hard. Hazel slammed into the wall and coughed weakly, Jacob slid across the floor with a grunt as Steven bellowed, "Both of you, out! Now!"

"He hit him first," Connie exclaimed passionately. "That's not fair!"

Neither moved, both staring in fear and pain at the giant that was so furious with them. "I said NOW!" Steven turned pink and picked both of them up by their shirts to drop onto the porch. "When you both learn how to talk it out like men and not little boys, you will be allowed to come home."

"We live here too," Jacob croaked through a gag. "I'll die out here. Don't do this."

"The entire polycule just watched you guys critically injure each other," Steven told them with a break in his voice. "You idiots endangered Jack..." He sighed shakily and pulled out his phone. "I'll call you an ambulance and that's it."

Hazel gasped in pain and clutched his side wheezing, "My ribs are b-broken! It hurts!"

Jacob scooted to the edge of the porch, grabbed his head with one hand and threw up six times consecutively. He slurred, "Now that's not right at all."

Steven was having none of it. "Serves you both right. This could've been seamless and easy from the beginning. Yes, I'd like an ambulance to the mansion off 67 with a broken arm and possible concussion, and possible broken ribs with respiratory distress." He started to cry and nodded. "It was a domestic dispute turned to violence."

Then he slammed the door and walked away.

*

At first Anna expected everyone to be mad at her and shun her too for some reason, but to her surprise Connie and Jasmin hugged her tight. She broke down and screamed, she was so furious that they'd dug themselves this deeply when there never needed to be violence to solve the damn problem.

And Jack wasn't even a problem.

Why would Hazel internalize an obvious lie that Jacob had purposely gotten his husband pregnant? Why had he kept it in that he knew? And to hit Jacob when they were so close? It just didn't make any sense.

And her Adam! How could he lie in their bed with them holding such a heavy not-so-secret when he knew damn well how much they adored Jacob too? All the damn goth had to do was mention it was a possibility in passing and they'd have started working through anything that could possibly come up. Getting pregnant twice for Adam was a miracle, and with two healthy little babies, one with a very big personality! To get pregnant three times with a surprise sex had them so excited, and Anna even briefly suspected it was Jacob's before they even had seen him. Something about the pregnancy felt different to her, but then again, she'd stayed silent too.

Steven ended up coming in and then pivoted to walk back out. He spoke seldom to the other adults and when he did it was short angry bursts he couldn't contain. He was so ready to defend Adam and Jacob, and then his Hazel had to go and hit Jacob. It was the second time he'd laid hands on someone in the polycule, though Steven refused to believe that Hazel hitting him after the car omissions incident was anything but an accident like Hazel swore.

This though, slamming his fist into Jacob, was on purpose even through the haze of rage.

And how was Steven supposed to react? Part of him felt like he was responsible, he'd been so excited when Jack was born that he never saw any conflict coming. Some savior of the universe he was if he couldn't actually handle or predict conflict. His duties on Homeworld started to slip, he started training like he did with Jasper again and had nearly cracked open his head when he was weight lifting too hard and fast. His parenting skills were suffering, especially with Azalea being an eccentric freshman in high school who was still constantly getting into trouble.

*

Two days passed and Adam didn't speak nearly at all. When people tried to comfort him, he did unspeakable things to keep people's hands off of him. He flinched and backed away, he gave them blood curdling stares, he trembled with rage if it wasn't a child. With the kids he was still fantastic, he didn't subject them to anything.

The second afternoon, he whipped out his gun to point at his head and stood rigid like a soldier when Anna tried to grab his hand after catching him frozen. "Touch me and it'll be the last time you do. I have set a boundary, do not cross it."

Anna had put her hands up and blew out a steadying breath to quell her terror. "Adam, I-I hear you and I understand that a lot is going on right now." She tried for a gentle smile. "I will not touch. Just put the gun down and maybe later we can talk, yeah?" He was still in there behind the shell, Anna had seen this armor before and it was his most impenetrable for everyone but her. A setting of his jaw was just him trying to build more but she wouldn't let him. Her Adam was in there and she had to get him out like a bomb squad: carefully with no error. "Hazel and Jacob will be ready for visits soon, and I want to talk to you before anything else. None of this is your fault. Can you hear me?"

The gun dipped an iota for just a second.

Anna beamed and blinked terrified tears out of her eyes that Adam observed coldly. She'd never seen him so emotionless and... cruel looking. "So you can. That's good. Better than yesterday. I know you were on birth control. I found the papers, I did the math, I called the doctors." She took a shaky step toward him and kept his gaze. "I'm on your side. I understand why Hazel got angry but you and Jacob are technically in the right, okay? He should've never put his hands on Jacob." She got just close enough to reach and then right in front of him. She could tell he was trying not to cry but he didn't need to. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I know you must be devastated having to choose between your husbands. You should be allowed to be excited about Jack. But it's gonna be okay, I promise."

Adam sniffled, the dam was breaking, and his head dropped as he started to sob. Anna tensed as his finger twitched in the trigger of the gun and he pressed it hard into his temple. She didn't actually know if he could survive brain damage being half immortal. It might make him completely brain dead for awhile, she didn't know. "Promise me and I won't do it. Please tell me he won't have to grow up thinking he's a mistake that ruined our polycule."

"I promise," Anna murmured as she pulled the gun from his now looser grasp, noting it was in fact loaded and safety was off. Adam had been serious, though she still wondered how exactly shooting himself would've worked after noticing his heart only beat sometimes. "We've just gotta be patient."

She unloaded the gun and put the bullet in her pocket. It was absolutely insane but she hadn't slept well in days and she felt she should keep that particular one. Why? Who knew?

All she had to do was wrap her arms around him and squeeze. "You're not alone. I'm here, too."

He fell to his knees and started to cry like a child, he tightened his grip until it hurt and she let him. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry, Anna, I don't know—," His breath caught on a sob and he wailed, "I don't know what came over me! I'm s-so scared! I d— We were going to a-ask, I swear we were but we didn't
think—!"

Anna shushed him and rubbed his head. "No one's home but us, let it out." When he screamed his frustration, she dropped to press his face between her breasts and rock him.

Sometimes it was helpful, and thank the stars he started trying to catch his breath and calm down after another five minutes or he would've made himself sick. "Please promise me," He begged again. "I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry. I'm so sorry."

Repetitive motions, Adam had said again and again to them because rarely he could become completely inconsolable with his quiet panic disorder, repetitive motions for however long it takes.

When he was able to speak again, he whispered, "I'll never forgive myself for doing that to you. I'm so sorry, Anna. I'm so, so sorry. You deserve so much better than us." He rubbed her back and sighed. "I needed that cry. Please take my weapons and lock them up, I can't be trusted. I'm so out of sorts."

Anna nodded listlessly, crying herself. "I'm not upset with you. You're braver than I am, I think if I got Connie pregnant on accident I'd just end it all silently."

Adam giggled weakly. "Steven's a big sweetheart."

"You didn't quite see the way he threw them out," She countered anxiously. "He definitely aggravated both of their injuries." After a while she whispered, "What do we do with Hazel?"

Adam tensed, then relaxed. "It's hard when it's between two factions. I-I thought about kicking him out until he can apologize and be sincere but that punishes everyone and won't solve anything. I'll still miss Hazel even when I'm mad at him. Then I thought maybe Steven and Connie could take him but Connie is so mad at Hazel she can't even think straight and Steven's even more furious at Hazel." He clenched his fists then unclenched them. "Jasmin's not really mad at Hazel, Alex is indifferent but incredibly annoyed in general because he thinks this all is the dumbest shit he's ever seen and he's right... But I still couldn't ask them to take him."

"He did kind of fly off the handle in the worst way possible," Anna allowed with a shake of her head. "I think it's definitely sucky, but the couch in our home is the only logical option with Juniper. She's asking what happened."

Adam sniffled. "Okay. I'll explain to Juni when I'm calmer."

*

Doctor Johnbetter pulled the rest of them aside when they all came in the next day to check on the boys. "Neither are pressing charges, but Jacob is aggressive and hostile to any male doctors, we had to switch him over to psychiatric female nurses."

Jasmin started to cry and Alex pulled her into his side protectively. He'd just taken Jacob's role, like literally. He let her cling to him and even kissed her cheek when she was upset. "He has a fear of men. As long as you stick with what you're doing, we can handle that."

Johnbetter smiled tensely and wrote that down. "We've prescribed him medication for his concussion, a side effect is paranoia so watch out for that." He flipped through a clipboard and frowned. "And Artez is having psychiatric issues of his own, but more intensely. Does he have any history of suicidal thoughts or suicidal behavior?"

Adam switched Jack to his other side and shook his head hesitantly. "Not that we know of."

He nodded seriously. "Well, I'm going to be honest with you and say I think it's criminally stupid to let Artez go without sending him to a psychiatric unit first, but I can't hold him unless one of you gives full consent because he hasn't tried to hurt himself with how often he sleeps." When they went silent, the doctor waved at Jack. "They talked about how much they loved you the entire time we did their procedures. Even through the anesthesia!" Jack smiled with his two teeth and Johnbetter laughed. "I can see why! Well, when you guys decide, we can go from there. Both rooms are open to visiting, but we ask that you don't distress Hazel if you can help it. He's been having crying spells that turn into panic/guilt attacks. These aggravate his injury. If he has another one, call for help and a nurse will sedate him so he doesn't re-puncture his lung."

Adam started to sob under his breath and Anna rubbed his back. "God, this is such a mess."

They congregated in the lobby all crying and upset, and Steven wiped at his face. "One at a time? Balls to the walls full send? We need a plan."

Jasmin laughed bitterly. "I don't think it matters. Does anyone not want to visit one or the other?"

Adam raised his hand. "I won't until they apologize to each other and our son." Anna cleared her throat and he huffed. "I mean, yeah I'll go see both first. I'd love to." His face twitched with irritation when they all stared at him with various degrees of stranger danger. "Stop looking at me like that."

They averted their eyes and Connie pouted at the floor. This could've been a non existent issue and now they'd had to send their kids to grandparents for the afternoon. How stupid.

Adam had to pick which one he was less mad at and it took a while. Eventually he decided that since he hadn't landed the first hit and only worked in self defense, he'd see Jacob first.

But then he panicked. Didn't that look like he was choosing one over the other, and the one that was not his husband that he'd accidentally sort of cheated with? Was it even cheating? He was so tired of asking himself that question knowing how the others felt about it.

He paused and turned back, then stopped again. If he went to see the main aggressor he was just as responsible for hurting Jacob at that point. It looked like encouraging him. Hazel was one of the loves of his life, his sun and blue skies, but good god the man hadn't needed to beat his Jacob until his arm was broken in three places and he was majorly concussed.

Connie found him leaned against the wall between rooms and reached out her arms. "Here, I'll take the baby. The rest of us want to play with Jack while you decide."

Adam felt it within his heart of hearts when he murmured, "Be careful. He's made of a polycule's love."

Jack stretched out his legs and swatted at Connie's breasts in search of milk, so she walked off with a weak smile. "There's no right answer."

That gave Adam enough courage to go see Hazel first.

He was breathing uneven with his eyes closed. His skin was waxy, Hazel looked like he was dying and Adam watched the monitors tell him things he didn't like: Hazels blood pressure was too low, his heart rate was too high as it worked extra hard, his lungs were bringing in 75% oxygen and he was wearing an oxygen tube through his nose.

"He whooped my ass and I deserved it," Hazel rasped suddenly. Slowly his head turned to Adam with his eyes closed but he didn't open them. "I understand if you're done with me. I've accepted I'm just..." He dragged in a strained breath and groaned in pain. "Just a big ass problem."

Adam clasped his hand carefully. "I can't lie to you and say I'm not extremely upset with you." He looked down at their wedding rings, engraved with their silly little achievement, 'enemies to lovers'. "I'll have to think a little harder about it, but for now I am not leaving you."

Hazel squeezed his hand fraily and a monitor started to beep. "I wish he would have killed me," He confessed quietly.

"Don't say that," Adam choked back. "Please, don't say that."

He laid there silently for a few minutes. "I get you now. I'm sorry it took this for that to happen."

Adam kissed his hand. He didn't wanna talk about Hazel being suicidal, not when he could practically taste it. "What all are we looking at for injuries?"

"Two broken ribs, one fractured rib, a punctured lung and a lot of wanting to die," He chuckled blankly then winced hard in pain and whimpered. "I'll... never forgive myself for laying a hand on him." He choked up and Adam's eyes widened as he started to cough hard through his crying. "Oh, God, I didn't even kn-know it happened until it was done! If I die, tell him I died hating myself!" He screamed the end and started gurgling incoherently, eyes rolling back.

Adam blinked tears out of his eyes and cried out for a nurse, but three were already coming in. "Artez? Artez! Can you hear my voice?!"

Another nurse slammed a button in the room and the intercom system went off. "Code blue, ICU. Code blue, ICU." It was then joined by the scariest sound Adam had ever heard, a two tone alert dinging that was familiar to him. He'd heard it right before he passed out in the ER. Minutes later he died.

"He prefers Hazel, call him Hazel!" Adam pleaded through tears. "What are you doing to him?"

A not so busy nurse walked him out with a gentle but pushing hand. "His lung fills with fluid when he gets upset, all the tears and snot get trapped in the lung if he can't cough it out. We'll have him intubated through his throat if we can get him back but we need you to leave. Worst case scenario, we'll get Steven."

He nodded, thankful to no end they'd obeyed their request. They knew Jacob couldn't die from this but Hazel hadn't had an incident like this yet, so Steven was always hovering and on call at any hour of the day.

Lip trembling, Adam forced himself to be okay enough to see Jacob and pushed in to find him staring out the window with his arm in a sling and a crutch balancing him. The lights were off and a special blind was pulled over the window so he could see out of it, but it was darkened considerably.

He nearly sagged in relief, Jacob looked okay and it encouraged him to see him standing.

"Jacob?" Adam called gently. "It's Adam."

He moved his head to the side but didn't really see him. It was immediately apparent his eyes couldn't see much at all distance wise unless it was extremely large like the sky and clouds. His movement was slow and disjointed, he returned to staring out the window shortly after.

Adam felt invisible to Jacob, it almost made him throw up.

"What?" He finally asked with a small slur. "It's a dashing day outside, innit? I just wish it would have a wee drizzle is all."

Adam's chest ached like he had been stabbed through the heart, he was practically bleeding out onto the floor as he leaned against the doorframe and tried not to start scream crying. This day kept getting more horrific, he couldn't keep taking these blows. His hand went over his mouth as he muffled some he couldn't hold in.

This was the one scenario he was unprepared for: it was like Jacob had become a dementia patient.

The only other thing that came of this was that Adam found his absolute limit with Hazel: if Jacob got amnesia from how hard he'd hit him that he forgot everything, including Adam, a divorce was unavoidable. He just had to pray that wasn't the case because he loved his husband to death. "Jacob, did you hear what I said? I'm here to visit," He tried again. "It's... Adam. You know me, right?"

This time a lightbulb went off after a few seconds and he stood taller to turn and lean against the windowseat. "Ah, right. Your husband damaged my noggin. Often I don't even recall anything happened with the pain meds and all that silly business." His face went downcast. "I was enjoying the peace."

"We don't have to talk about it." He crossed over to stand in front of him and cupped his cheek. At least his pupils were similar sizes though they were still noticeably different. "You remember me though, right?" He whispered shakily. "Do you remember us?"

Jacob smiled at him ruefully, eyes welling with tears. "Tell me, how could I forget the father of my son?"

Adam smiled through his tears too and moved his eyes to his cast. "Injuries?"

"A moderate concussion—," Jacob cut himself off and started to sway so hard Adam had to catch him. "Broken arm in three places like predicted. Minor sprain in the wrist. V-Vertigo."

He wasn't as gravely injured as he'd initially seemed (in fact Hazel's were way more life threatening logically) and that's how Adam made the decision that Hazel hadn't ever been trying to really hurt Jacob. It made clear sense suddenly: Jacob's face wasn't even bruised where he'd hit him, Hazel was holding back even then when he was a man who could bare knuckle fight and do it well. He knew where to hit Jacob to take him out and how hard and could achieve it easily. Jacob had been fighting to incapacitate but whatever means he had available, but who could blame him when Hazel had five inches and easily 60 pounds on him?

Adam kissed his forehead. He couldn't blame Jacob at all for anything, probably.

As much as he tried to move on right then, there was just no excuse that could be made to make this go away. Hazel still nearly caused irreparable damage to the intelligent man, but his stability made him feel better as he carried Jacob bridal style to the bathroom to rub his head while he was violently ill. He kept apologizing but he didn't need to, not yet. Adam was just there to take care of him without drama.

After he was empty Adam fed him water and sat through the doctor telling Jacob he'd make a mostly full recovery. "You might sometimes get frustrated looking for lost words to describe things, or you'll become dizzy and faint. Sometimes you might lack coordination as your brain heals but if you can't hold out both arms to your side without one dipping, have someone check you for stroke symptoms and come to the ER immediately."

Jacob blinked at her and nodded. "Alright. S'not so bad."

Adam sucked in a breath and gently kissed the top of his head. "Is there any way he can make a full recovery?"

She smiled kindly but it was melancholy. "He got hit right in the temple decently hard, then hit the back of his head. His brain hit his skull hard enough we had been worried he wouldn't wake up again."

Adam took a very deep breath before he started to think things that were dark and very unlike him. "C-can we have a s-second? I know you have other patients and you don't need to leave or anything—,"

The doctor nodded. "Absolutely, I'll get Jacob here some water."

Adam paced, trying to imagine a world where after Hazel hit Jacob, he didn't wake up again. How close really was it? How many mere pounds of force was Hazel to killing Jacob? Sure she said initially but...

He stared down at his ring. He needed to talk to Hazel, and get his side of the story because he could not divorce his husband, he'd lied. He needed Hazel too, and Hazel needed to know that he almost killed Jacob and think about that. Just not now, not when it would kill him too because he was so distressed about a concussion. Knowing he'd almost killed him right now would push Hazel over the edge so far they might not be able to get him back.

Adam's moral compass felt all kinds of fucked, but what else could he do for the good of their son? Men had fights sometimes and with five of the eight being men he was surprised it hadn't happened sooner.

"Adam?" He turned to Jacob and didn't even hide the tears streaming down his face. Jacob raised an eyebrow and murmured, "You're crying over an impossibility. I cannot be killed and any effort would be futile and silly at best." He spread his arms and Adam let himself cry in them, he'd needed another and he supposed he was due.

The nurse came back in and sat down again. "Better?" Adam nodded gratefully and kissed Jacob's neck territorially. He'd be like this for a while with Jasmin and Alex. "Chances are he'll suffer with symptoms for the next few months at least once the initial injury heals and gradually get better. It's important to be patient. But we have high hopes, he's been quite pleasant to the new doctors and cooperative to the fullest extent."

Adam pushed away more sadness and made eye contact with Jacob. "I'll still love him the same either way."

When the doctor left Jacob snuggled onto his lap a bit more with a soft cockney, "Daddy, tell me a story please? On the sill?"

He carefully helped him up and gave him the utmost patience when he had to wait for his dizziness to pass. He was thankful neither his husband or soulmate were permanently crippled in any way, even if both were downtrodden and miserable.

Once he sat, Jacob insisted passionately, "St-stay here, with me. I need you to stay and never, ever leave me like that again." Then he winced like his head ached and gripped Adam's arm aggressively, eyes welling with tears. "I missed you so fucking much, why couldn't we just talk about it? Why did this happen?!" Adam swallowed his building sobs and Jacob started bawling like a baby. He cried so hard he nearly went unconscious, then they ramped up into the cries of a brokenhearted child, "I'll kill myself if you ever do that to me again. I swear to god I'll find a way! I need you close, please! Please, Daddy don't leave me again." Adam broke down and held him delicately, loving the way he croaked his joy weakly and nuzzled in over and over again as if to make up for every time he'd missed it over the one entire year that they'd barely spoken and stayed away from each other.

He didn't say it, but internally Adam felt the same way. If a rift formed between them again, he'd just end it. It was a fucking miracle he hadn't, especially with feeling like he lost one of his Littles. Losing Jack sometimes ached through him when he'd found Jacob staring off into the distance sadly with his blanket and a small aura to him, like he was stuck in Little Space and lonely. It wasn't that Hazel and Anna weren't enough because they were, but Jacob had too many pieces of him for him to exist as his normal self instead of a haunting memory if he ever walked away. So he wouldn't let it get to that, he was more serious about spending time with their family, with his love and the baby they'd made together.

Adam told him the story of the first time they'd ever said I Love You. "It was a Thursday night and I remember it being a Thursday because something in me thought it was a weird day to confess love. I was sitting at the dinner table on my phone and you poked your head into the commons. I saw you out the corner of my eye looking to see if anyone else was around and then you walked up to me and pulled me out of my seat." He dragged in a nostalgic breath. "And you took my hand to press against your heart and you didn't even have to say it but you looked at me all pink in the face with those pretty hazel eyes and said, "Adam, I just fell in love with you, isn't that wonderful?" with so much sweetness, you've always been so sweet." He cried a little more, this time with joy. "And when I told you I loved you it was the strongest I'd ever felt in my entire life."

Jacob hummed in his half sleeping and snuggled into him more. "I love you, Daddy."

The rest came through too to find an unsurprising but almost perfect welcome:

Jacob was passed out in Adam's arms in the window seat while Adam stared down at the tree below them with bright yellow leaves and rubbed his head. When he noticed them he didn't smile, but his eyes had regained the sparkle that only Jacob could put there. It was clear he'd wanted more time alone, his wary gaze glanced between Alex and Jasmin for a split second before his cheeks went pinkish with shame. "Bring me our son and I'll wake him up for you. He's a little clingy."

Steven smiled and brought him Jack. Babies were little energy beacons, he'd gotten quieter even as they tried to keep him happy and distracted. "Here. Freshly changed."

Adam grinned at Jack and leaned down to sit the baby on his lap next to Jacob's chest. Curiously he tugged at the gown and Jacob stretched out his neck. "Blimey, the whole rooms spinning."

A small hand grabbed at the gown more and pulled. Jack babbled but the 'Dada' that was always present in his babbling to Jacob was there and easy to hear.

Jacob slowly sat up and dropped his eyes to their little boy with his freckles. At first another strike of fear went through all of them when Jacob looked genuinely confused. "What a dwit, you're just precious." Then softly, "Who's are you?"

Connie started to sniffle, burying her head into Steven's chest and Jasmin could barely keep it together. "Oh my god, I can't—,"

Adam mouthed, "Just give him a second!"

The Brit's eyebrows rose and he looked at Adam, then the baby a bit more carefully. When he moved his eyes to look over the polycule and didn't find freckles or green eyes, he lifted his arm to stare at his own freckles. Piece by piece he put it together and extended a finger for Jack to hold onto. Jack grabbed it and teethed on the fist wrapped tightly around it.

Tears started overflowing and running down Jacob's cheeks, even when it was apparent it was hurting his head so badly. He raised his arms and Jack went to him easily. "You don't know how happy I am to officially call you ours, Jack," He told the infant. "You're a perfect Polycule Baby."

The exhale of relief that filled the room was near deafening. For now, the main situation was defused. A family was reunited, and others that had raised the child closely too got to have him as their Polycule Baby. It was the best thank you they could've gotten.

Steven cleared his throat and nodded Adam to the hallway while Jasmin got reacquainted with her husband.

Adam brushed his hair out of his eyes and blanched. He'd never seen Steven so professional before, in that moment he really exuded the cold hard Diamond in his stomach.

They walked in silence until they got outside and to the outdoor seating area, but neither sat.

Adam could only bring himself to glance over at him when Steven's breathing started to grow strained, like he was trying not to cry. "Steven..."

He sat in the chair and started to weep in agony. All he could do was watch Steven drag in traumatized breaths and hate himself for this; if he had just come clean immediately no one would have to be dealing with this amount of pain.

But it was clear Steven's pain lie elsewhere at the moment.

He stood suddenly enough to make Adam back away a bit but then Steven shoved his hand in his pocket and presented the glass bottle now nearly a quarter empty with this eyes shut tightly. "I'm sorry." It took him a moment to collect himself and Adam was paralyzed with a growing sense of absolute despair. "He... he didn't make it. He died like..." Steven's voice cracked violently but he pushed on. "He died when the Code Blue stopped. I was paged after they tried the defibrillator cause they couldn't do CPR without ruining their chances more. I b-brought him back."

Adam's legs gave out and he collapsed to scream. He hadn't reached a depth of volume or strength behind a cry since Code Mistake, the ground underneath him cracked violently and he nearly fell into it if it hadn't been for Stevens quick reflexes.

He knew this level of depression would take years to go away, and he understood why Hazel woke up in the night clutching him desperately. It had never crossed his mind because he didn't like to think about it, but Hazel had seen him die.

Steven wrapped in him a perfect hug. "I'm sorry for his immortality."

Adam murmured, "Please, fuse with me. I can't go on alone."

Pluto went to get Anna and found her staring into the distance in between the two rooms. She looked up at him and laughed weakly. "I guess there's no right answer. Jacob is too ashamed to talk to me, Hazel hates himself so much for hurting Jacob that he won't talk to me..."

Pluto sat with her and pulled her into him. "Steven will apologize for hurting them further."

"He saved my boyfriends," She rebutted blankly. "I'm forever in his debt."

Pluto huffed, a part of Steven growing Jaded. "He hates when people say that."

Anna wiped away a single tear. "Who cares?"

*

Hazel was still released a day after Jacob as he adjusted to things like not having a heartbeat or needing to eat or breathe as often, and almost instantly he was struck with horrible night terrors. They weren't demons or shadows that went bump in the night, nor more images of his sister struggling for air, no this was a million times worse.

It was the split second before Jacob had hit him back with the force that nearly rivaled Steven's: when Jacob had looked at him like his feelings were hurt and he was afraid, and Hazel had imagined it was the look he gave Oliver.

He'd sit by himself in the dark living room as the kids slept reliving the moment over and over and over again. There was no point in trying to sleep, every time he did he saw the same fear Oliver must have seen in Jacob's eyes. It made him throw up all the time, he was rapidly losing weight from the guilt eating him alive and it was obvious there were others still parentally mad at him. Disappointed, even.

It wasn't even jealousy that had made him do it, he was just so betrayed and hurt. If Jacob had just asked, even nervously, Hazel would've been all for it. He'd already had names picked out: Jack, or possibly Liam. He would've been their number one cheering section. It hurt that he'd never gotten to experience the joy of knowing but neither had they. Hazel was just a voyeur to the deepest part of him and there was no one he was more honored to share his husband with than his twin flame.

That and... as uncomfortable as it was to admit, Hazel had been feeling guilty since the day they got married. They were in love, he didn't doubt that Adam was in love with him anymore and he was so in love with Adam. But looking at it realistically...

Sometimes, Hazel felt like a total asshole for marrying Adam when he was so clearly meant for Jacob. Even just watching the way Jacob could pull him out of any kind of meltdown was incredible. Before all of this started Jacob had come up with something to get Adam's inflection and tone back when he went numb. He'd walked up to Adam and asked him to read the text aloud. As it turned out, Adam's autistic voice monotony simply melted away reading The Fitness Gram Pacer Test because the more he sounded like a computer reading that, the more Jacob cracked up like a 14 year old and Adam started to laugh too. By the end his actual voice was back, and he was a blushing mess. They just worked, some of the things Hazel couldn't figure out about Adam Jacob just seemed to know.

He and Jasmin kind of had a private system going on about it, sometimes they just found themselves spending more time together than others when the two needed contact. Adam was the go-to for Jacob's breakdowns because they had finally forged a full agreement over Jacob's Little. When he couldn't handle anything and just cried, when he went silent, when he started going into a brutal flashback that resulted in him breaking things and injuring himself, he'd only let Adam touch him. He didn't want his wife and trophy husband Alex to see him weak, but Adam was allowed. He was too afraid he'd hurt them but he knew Adam could tank a hit. It was nice, yet something deep inside of Hazel was jealous when push came to shove.

He was so jealous how incredible of a partner Jacob was. The Brit became the hot topic a year into the polycule flat, he was almost as popular as Steven. Jacob just empathized so well that he was magnetic and effortlessly charming and Hazel sometimes felt that between those two and Adam, there was just no comparison. Then he felt childish.

Steven had declined healing either of them any further than the hospital and Essence did with an uptick of a stern, parental eyebrow. "I am not your father. I don't need to clean up your mistakes every time they happen and I've got enough on my plate with my twin problem child Azalea, let alone my other children and you." He did give both of them non-healing kisses and sigh wistfully. "I really wish I could. This was hell for everybody and you guys broke our hearts way worse than the initial situation. Thanks a lot for making me have to hurt you so I didn't have to watch you kill each other."

Connie crossed her arms, leaning against their house door. "Steven," She warned.

He sighed but Anna piped up, "He's right."

"Just because it's right doesn't mean it has to be said," Connie countered aggressively. "Haven't we all been through enough?"

Hazel sighed heavily. "There's no amount of hell I could go through that would begin to be enough of a punishment. You should've just left the hospital and pissed on my grave." He walked off to sit at the table and try to get his breathing under control and hated the sympathetic stares as hard as he could, he didn't deserve them. "You guys—sh-should just kick me out since I'm immortal." He had to lean forward a bit to get the oxygen in, and he watched his tears hit the table brokenly. "I'm tired of me too, I can't imagine dealing with me for eternity. I don't even have to be healed."

Jacob hummed and grabbed his crutches to go into his house. When he came back out he dropped his medical bills in front of Hazel and didn't speak a word as he hooked his good arm around his wife and they departed into their house with her scolding him for moving around so much.

Having broken ribs sucked, but not as much as the flinching. Jacob already had insurmountable trauma and personally Hazel thought the EMDR therapy had only served to instill the fear all over again with crystal clear clarity. Hazel could sense Jacob tensing every time he walked by. The man who was smaller, lankier, and less prone to fighting had nearly snapped two of his ribs clean off with well placed and powerful punches. Hazel was really impressed.

But Jacob... Jacob was afraid of him and it was eating him alive. He may have stood his ground, but that didn't change that Hazel had hit him first. It was self defense turned into a full on cage fight with no rules but to survive. And that meant Jacob was in fight or flight constantly around him.

After the fight he just flew.

Meals consistently went something like:

Anna would serve him a plate and kiss his forehead. "Eat up, okay? You're still healing since your healing power is out."

Hazel wouldn't even bother trying to catch her eye anymore, sometimes she couldn't even meet it. He stared at the food but he was numb to anything and everything. "I don't need to eat. Thank you for the effort but I don't deserve it."

And Adam would sit up a little, a slight pink tinge to his nearly constantly purple eyes. It was horrifying, Adam's eyes looked like they'd shattered between his glowing purple and pink intermixed eyes. He was heartbroken Hazel had died, and that's where he kept it. He had seen that same look in Steven's eyes when Original Cosmo died in his arms. "Hazel, you should still try to eat. Our bodies a-aren't... you don't need to eat but it still helps with injuries, we have to eat for that reason."

"I said I don't deserve to eat," He'd counter blankly. "And I can't eat after what I did. I'll just throw it back up again."

Anna and Adam would have one of their silent conversations and Hazel would wish he could watch like he used to with fascination as their eyes glowed.

Anna would murmur, "Everyone deserves to eat, and you need to be healthy so you boys can reconcile and we can hopefully move on." She'd dip to catch his eye but he'd stare through her. "We still love you, Daddy."

Hazel would grow so incredibly spiteful. Why were these incredible people giving him the time of day? He hated them for being so kind, what the hell was wrong with them? "There's plenty of things I love that I'd be better off without. Thank you for the meal, but I do not deserve it."

Thank their lucky stars their kids were staying with Adam's parents in town.

Speaking of that, Adam's parents were acting ridiculous too.

Daun had given him a sympathetic, long and gentle hug and murmured with a feminine grace, "Don't tell anyone I said this, but I understand where the communication dropped enough for anger to rise. It wasn't right, but it wasn't wrong. I'm disappointed in Adam, he knows better than to let things sit."

Don had helped him with his drains with careful, fatherly hands he wasn't accustomed to from anyone but occasionally Greg. "My son and I, Adam, we've talked about if this happened."

Hazel broke out of his numbness to stare but couldn't speak.

Don sighed. "He's like me, he gets bad feelings. He starts to get paranoid until he has to drop it or drive himself crazy." He shook his head sadly. "Usually he doesn't until it happens but this time he did, and he paid a massive price. He called me a year before Jack was born, so about three months before he got pregnant, and begged me to tell him everything was going to be okay and that he was just losing his mind with paranoia."

Hazel grabbed his bucket and started to throw up, numb all over again. Don rubbed his head the whole time and sang him to sleep.

*

Adam walked up to Hazel sitting in the living room not asleep on the couch at 3:47 am three weeks later and kicked him out. "Anna and I have talked. You two need to apologize and fix this. Now. I did my part, I apologized and it sucked but that's part of being a mature adult. I'm sick of seeing my husband and boyfriend avoiding each other. Our kids are asking why you guys don't talk anymore. I won't apologize again."

So Hazel trudged out pathetically only to find Jacob sitting in the commons living room staring at a turned off TV. His memory was getting better finally, but he'd muttered to Connie that he was seeing static everywhere he looked. Sometimes the ringing in his ears got deafening and he'd be sick but it hadn't happened for a few days now.

Upon realizing he'd entered, Jacob stood and limped off. His walk was a little unsteady as he healed. It wasn't angry or petty, he could see it was instinctive self preservation, and they were alone in there. Jacob had every right not to trust him even if it hurt Hazels feelings to no end.

As soon as he opened the door, Jasmin, Abel and Alex appeared on the other side. His wife tipped her head. "I don't think we need to have this conversation a seventh time, honey."

He sighed, turned, and slid down the wall. "I deserved it and it's done!" He complained loudly. "Please, just leave me be! I'm still co— cun— ugh!" He slammed a fist against the wall beside him. "Concussed."

Hazel avoided Abel at all costs, his eyes were murderous even when he watched over him when he fell asleep. Abel had a kind soul but he was stiffly on Jacob's side, even if he acknowledged this could've been done better. He did however, slave away for Hazel out of nowhere it seemed. Whatever he needed, Abel provided at the drop of a hat with no hesitation. For a while Hazel prepared to be fed bleach or rat poison. But everything Abel did was loving toward him, even if he was too angry to speak.

They all sat in a gut wrenching, heavy silence only magnified when Steven and Connie came out looking exhausted and searching for alcohol.

"You didn't deserve it," Hazel mumbled shyly. "We all did the math. I hate that you're afraid of me now." He hated that Jacob struggled to speak when he was upset now, too.

Jacob finally turned to look at him with steely, wet eyes. "Well, y-yeah. A man much bigger and stronger than me as-ssaulted me just because he—," He clenched his fists and they waited for his brain to recover his ability to think and speak at the same time. Another man couldn't control himself from hu-hu-hurting me? That's..." His hand went up to hold up two fingers. "T-t-t-twice now."

He hated the stutter even if doctors said it would get better within a short amount of time. Hazel hated it so much he glanced at the knives lying out in the kitchen with minor lust. They couldn't be invincible, he felt even within his lack of living that he could still die.

Hazel burst into tears and bowed his head. What could he say? Jacob was correct. "I'm sorry... I'm just... lost. I didn't think I'd actually do it."

"But you d-d-did," He countered. "And I did the same to you." His head banged against the wall and he sighed wantonly. The anger went away with a few minutes of deep breathing, and his speech was even again. "I can't believe I compared you to my father. That was really fucking petty of me, wow."

Connie coughed out a half laugh. "A little."

Jacob blinked and stood abruptly, glancing at the arm and cast in a sling. He crossed in front of Hazel and watched him try to cry silently with curiosity. It was probably obvious that it was hurting his injury, it was burning and aching and he was drugged up 90% of the time. Still he couldn't stop. Of all of the terrible things he'd done in his life, this was the worst, especially when he claimed to love Jacob as much as he did.

He wasn't sure the audience had disappeared until he found they had. Then his eyes locked on Jacob's. Haphazardly the freckled godsend got on his knees and spread his arms and Hazel all but collapsed into them as a dam of guilt burst. "I'm sorry! I'm so so sorry! I haven't hardly slept, I haven't eaten a full meal in so long because I feel so bad! I'm sorry! I promise I'm so so sorry! How do I fix this?! I don't want you to be afraid of me! I miss your hugs, I miss being around you and I miss being able to kiss you whenever I want to. You're one of the best things that ever happened to me!" He screamed as quietly as he could, then again when his ribcage provided horrible pain. "I need you... but—,"

Jacob shook his head quickly. "But n-nothing. You're forgiven. Completely." He lifted Hazels head to rest his forehead against his. "Do you remember Christmas break at Nova?"

His voice was raw with emotion but soothing. Hazel nodded. "Of course."

"Those things that wanted to hurt each other weren't us," He whispered achingly. "I know that wasn't you who hurt me. I felt it when it happened that that wasn't you. It's just our monsters."

Hazel sighed deeply as he calmed, not believing him but trying to. "How do I fix this? How do we move on? I don't... I don't want to break up over this."

"We aren't going to." The hug tightened and his voice grew heavy with tears. "P-Please don't-t say that-t-t. You're going to break my heart, Artez."

Jacob had never used his birth name. Not a day in his life had he even uttered it even in curiosity, and it hit Hazel even harder. "Jacob. I missed you so much."

He pulled away finally to look at him head on. "I still love you. That didn't change when we put our hands on each other. I could see it in your face when you realized my arm was broken that it hurt you to hurt me. Come lay with me. Please."

They'd crashed on the couch and woke up healed. Jacob moved his fingers and there was no pain. Hazel sat up fast too, he took a deep breath and nothing ached. He coughed; no bile. Jacob shook his head like an idiot expecting to pass out or throw up and nothing. His mind was clear, maybe even sharper than before which gave him mixed feelings.

They turned only to find Steven in the kitchen smirking to himself largely as he sang.
"So maybe I'll talk to you
The only way I know how to
Mmm, you've said your speech
Mmm, through sharpened teeth
You break the walls and spikes grow from your skin
I think it might be worth a try
Or are we ready to let this die
Mmm, a monsters here
Mmm, you plug your ears
But hey, you might just listen to it sing:
Please let the devil in."

As a parent, he'd become more sure of himself as their kids turned out to be loving, accepting and loyal people. He loved having a family, and he was more confident as he discovered he was an excellent father.

His family had perfect diversity, and his "problem child" Azalea was just his clone and he was a little harder on her antics because when push came to shove she was his favorite, though he rarely chose to show it.

All the parents knew, though.

They approached him from behind and he turned immediately as if expecting them. "Good evening," He greeted with a smooth, deep tone. "Glad to see my boyfriends are getting along again." He was still Steven, he was just older and wiser and with that came along the shit eating grin that he gave them when he was right and they were wrong.

Because like his wife, Steven loved to be right.

Hazel frowned. "What's so funny?"

Steven looked between them deliberately and went back to filling water bottles and sippy cups for breakfast. "I lied to you guys, I love cleaning up messes. Throughout my entire childhood it was all I did and I drove myself crazy in my teens because I didn't know what to do without it. Then I said I'd never do it again. Hand me the lid for this in the sink, please." Jacob clumsily handed it to him as he continued on. "But I love this shit. I love being able to heal you guys after finding you snuggled up on the couch together."

"Cause it makes you feel good?" Jacob asked cynically. He didn't know why he was annoyed when Steven wasn't necessarily being condescending, maybe he needed to catch up on more sleep. "To see us make up?"

Steven paused and leaned against the counter to cross his arms. "No shit, Sherlock. Your fight made everyone miserable. Why would that make me more upset than having to watch you guys try to avoid each other?" Both broke the eye contact and stared anywhere but at him. He may have said he wasn't their father but the tone he was using was one that only a father of many children could achieve. "This is the end of the conversation," He told them, turning back to the sink. "Leo likes orange, Daisy likes yellow, Phoebe and Milo both like red, Lucky likes green, Asher and Cosmo like blue, Azalea likes purple, the rest are cute little babies~," He muttered to himself as he filled cups. As far as he was concerned the conversation was literally not able to continue even if they tried.