August 1, 2014

Today was the day of the first concert in the North American leg of the tour. We went to Toronto, Canada first.

While Michael was preforming with his bandmates, Louis came up to me and began kissing down my neck. I knew this would happen.

I shooed him off, but he kept leaving then coming back to me and trying to different things to get me to have sex with him.

"Louis, I'm not having sex with you right now," I whispered so no one else would hear.

"Yes you are, Kitten, and you will like it," he answered. I rolled my eyes and walked away, not listening to his response.

"You better hop on this dick, Kitten, or you won't like what happens," he threatened. I shrugged.

He came over to me, "If you don't have sex with me, I'll tell Michael, in detail, about every single one of our sessions. You don't want that to happen, do you?"

I didn't answer. I just stood up and walked towards the nearest closet. Louis came in after me.

He grabbed a condom from his pant's pocket before peeling the skinny jeans off of his legs.

"I knew that'd get you here," he smirked, "Why didn't you want to come, Kitten? I thought you loved my dick being inside of you."

"I do, but.." I paused, taking my shirt off and also not knowing what to say. Louis watched me, waiting for me to finish, "I just think it's wrong."

"It is, but that's what I love about it," he whispered on my neck as he pulled down my jeans clinging to my legs. He threw them onto the pile with Michael's "Idiot" shirt that I was wearing.

"Kitten, can you take my underwear off and give me a blowjob," he smirked at me as I got down on my knees. I pulled his underwear down and grabbed his member in my hand, pumping my fist before inserting it in my mouth.

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Louis put his clothes on while I put my own on, and we both walked out of the closet. I didn't want anyone to be in the room when we walked out of the closet, and thankfully, there was no one there.

"Thank you, Kitten," Louis kissed my jawbone, "Daddy enjoyed that." He slowly separated from me, going in a different direction than I was.

I walked to the side of the stage, looking out to see Michael standing there before beginning to play a song. He looked over at me, smirked and began playing.

"Haven," I heard a voice from behind me. I turned to see who it was, and Paris was right behind me.

"Hey Paris. What's up?" I asked her, smiling. She looked to be concerned. Whether it was about me or someone else, I didn't know.

"Are you... okay?" She wondered, "You seem to not be yourself lately. I don't like that, and it's worrying me."

"I'm fine," I told her, nodding, "I just have missed being on tour and watching the boys preform."

"Me too. I've really missed hearing the One Direction boys sing, especially when they all sing together," she smiled, "Or when Harry sings."

I like it when just Louis sings, I thought, he sometimes sings random songs to me, and I love that.

"Haven? What happened? You seemed to go into a trance there for a minute," she put her hand on my shoulder, trying to ask what was wrong. She really was worried about me.

"No, I'm alright. I was just thinking. Thanks for the concern, though," I smiled at her as she walked into the dressing room. I heard the boys yell goodnight to the crowd, and they ran backstage. As Michael passed me, I gave him a quick kiss, and he stopped for a moment to talk to me.

"So, babe.. Do you want to.." He smirked, whispering in my ear, implying that he wanted to have sex, of course..

"Not right now. You need to get cleaned up. Plus, I'm tired," I sighed, trying to cover up so we wouldn't have sex because, if we did, he would somehow tell that I was having sex with someone else. He's accused me of that before, but I denied it, laughing and telling him I'd never. I felt terrible lying to him all of the time. He was the best boyfriend I could have, but I was lying to him and cheating on him behind his back.

I, for some reason, just couldn't stop being with Louis. I loved Michael in many ways, but I also loved Louis is some ways. I couldn't make up my mind.

After what seemed like hours of thinking, Michael came up behind me and put his arms around my waist. I felt him smile while his chin lie on my shoulder.

"Baaaaabe.." Michael whined, wanting to have sex with me, "Come on.. please? I loove youu.."

"I loove youu, toooo," I smiled at him, turning towards my right shoulder, where his head was, to kiss him.

"Please," he begged. I shook my head, "I want to lie down in the dressing room. Come with me.."

I walked towards the dressing room, and Michael followed me. Michael lay on the couch, and he asked me to lie on top of him. I agreed, and I lay on top of him, my back on him, and he put his arms around my waist.

"I love this.. Just cuddling like this. I love you," Michael placed a few kisses on my neck, and I smiled before falling to sleep.