July 20, 2014

During the next break, I went back home with Mikey. I knew I was going to miss Louis a lot, because he was staying in England to be with his family.

While on break, the boys were working or with their family a lot, so I didn't get to see Mikey as much as I thought I would. I mainly stayed home with my parents.

I texted Louis a whole lot. We texted almost nonstop, except for when he was with his band. Sometimes he would send me videos of them practicing for the next concert, which would be in Canada.

He would send me pictures when he had a boner, usually saying, "you're not here to help me fix this, Hav:("

He would tease me sometimes, saying that I could have Mikey whenever I wanted if I was away from him, or if I was away from Mikey and with Louis, then I could have Louis. It was true, but he would "get mad" at me for it.

"Mikey," I looked up at him one of the times I was with him, which wasn't very often on his break.

"Yeah, babe?" He asked. I sighed before lying, "I miss Paris.."

"You'll get to see her in about a week and a half," he assured me, kissing my forehead.

"Yeah, but I don't want to wait to see her. I really need to tell her some things that I can't text her about. I need to tell her in person, and I don't want to wait a week and a half to tell her."

"You can't tell me? Is it something that has to do with me?" He got worried and grabbed my hands.

"No, no.. It's just.. It's hard to explain," I sighed, lying my head on his shoulder.

"Are you pregnant?" He looked at me worriedly. He didn't like seeing me like this. If only he knew I was acting.

"No, I'm not pregnant. It's something else."

"Do you want to tell me?" He asked, kissing my forehead again. He does that to make me feel safe, and for some reason, it always works.

"I'm sorry, Mikey," I looked up at him.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I'm going to England. I need to see Paris again. I'll call you when I get there, okay? I, um, I've already booked a flight for tomorrow morning."

"Can I go with you?"

"But you have to stay here and be with your family.. and the band. Spend time with your family, Mikey, and I'll be fine. I love you," I kissed him before getting up from his couch and grabbing my coat by the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow morning," I told him before opening the door. It seemed like he didn't have a choice, but he did. I just knew that he would be coming the next morning.

"Haven, wait-" Michael paused, running up to the door before I could close it. He grabbed both of my hands and brought me close to him, "stay the night."

I hesitated. I did love him. I don't know why I was being this harsh on him. I did decide to stay the night, but I was definitely leaving in the morning.

------

I got into London late on the twenty-first of July. I would be staying with Paris for the night and the next week or so.

"Paris!" I exclaimed after opening her front door. She smiled when she saw me on her front porch and also exclaimed, "Haven!"

"Even though it's only been a week, I've missed you," I hugged her and walked into her house.

"So how are you and Mikey doing back in Australia? Well, for a week, I guess.." She asked me.

"Mikey was pretty busy. I was usually home at my parents' house and not with Mikey. We're fine, though. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason, really. It's just that Lou has been talking about you quite a bit."

"Oh, wow.." I tried to act surprised, "He has been? That's weird. I texted him a little the other day. Maybe that's what he had said about."

"Yeah, maybe. What did you text about that was so interesting that he felt the need to tell us?" She wondered.

I shrugged and lied, "I honestly don't remember." Louis needed to be more careful!

"Okay. So you're staying here for a bit?"

"Could I?" I asked, and she nodded. I sat my suitcases on her bedroom floor. We both sat down on her bed and talked more.

"Would it be okay if Harry comes over a little bit? I had invited him over even before you came."

"Yeah, that's fine," I smiled, "I haven't seen him in a while."

"A week, Haven. Just a week," she laughed.

"I know, but that's a long time to go without seeing your friends that you're used to seeing every day!"

"I understand," she nodded, "I had missed you too. But why did you come back to England? There's another week and a half on break. Why aren't you spending every minute you can with Michael?"

"That's the thing. If I stayed in Australia, I wouldn't see Michael for more than a few minutes a day. He's spending time with his parents, the other boys' families, and with the band. It's like he's always busy and he never has time for me on break. On tour, it's a lot better because I can be with him a lot more. Also, with my parents in the house, they won't allow me to have Michael stay the night. They should trust me that I'm careful. I'm twenty for fucks sake!"

"Maybe you should tell Michael how you feel, and during the next break, he'll make more time for you."

"Maybe, yeah. I'll talk to him about it."