The Sun

The Sun Tarot card radiates optimism and positivity. A large, bright sun shines in the sky, representing the source of all life on Earth. Underneath, four sunflowers grow tall above a brick wall, representing the four suits of the Minor Arcana and the four elements.
In the foreground, a young, naked child is sitting on top of a calm white horse. The child represents the joy of being connected with your inner spirit, and his nakedness is a sign he has nothing to hide and has all the innocence and purity of childhood. The white horse is also a sign of purity and strength.

UPRIGHT: Positivity, fun, warmth, success, vitality

REVERSED: inner child, feeling down, overly optimistic

The Moon

The moon card shows a full moon in the night's sky, positioned between two large towers. The moon is a symbol of intuition, dreams, and the unconscious. Its light is dim compared to the sun and only slightly illuminates the path to higher consciousness winding between the two towers.

In the foreground is a small pool, representing the watery subconscious mind. A small crayfish crawls out of the pool, symbolising the early stages of consciousness unfolding. A dog and a wolf stand in the grassy field, howling at the moon, representing both the tamed and the wild aspects of our minds.

UPRIGHT: Illusion, fear, anxiety, subconscious, intuition

REVERSED: Release of fear, repressed emotion, inner confusion

****

Alice

After Friday night, I needed some time away from Liam. Last week was wild, and I didn't recognise myself anymore. I supposed to be a good little mum's girl. Now I was drinking and having sex with a man I just met a week ago. "When did this change happen? When did I become like this?" questions were roaming through my mind.

When I found Sam in the kitchen this morning, he agreed right away with my request for the day in Central London. We both had a soft hangover,therefore coffee to go, and bottled water from the pastry shop sounded so good. We also took cheese-filled toasties and headed to Hyde Park.

There were so many ducks I had never seen before, and the ponds were filled with koi fish. The peace I felt when I stepped inside the park was comforting, and I loved to observe the chipmunks playing around the trees. My peaceful moment was disturbed by Sam: "Alice, sorry to bother you in your daydreaming, but your phone is ringing for a second time now. I think you should answer."

I was consumed by the beauty of the park, and I didn't hear or feel my phone ringing. I nodded to Sam and picked my smartphone out of the pocket.

It was my mother. Hopefully, she will announce her return home. "Hello? Mum? When is your flight?"

"Hello, dear. Unfortunately, I will have to stay for another's two weeks.'' My gaze turned to Sam. He was also in a conversation with someone on his phone. "I have already talked to Liam, and he has no problem with you staying there. He said you had a great time last week and that you're really good at drawing.'' She smiled at her phone, and I did too. I guess Liam forgot to mention other things we did, but it's better that way, or Mother would freak out.

"I guess it's fine." I managed to answer, although I was still chewing my cheese toastie, and it got stuck on my teeth.

"It's everything, alright?" Mother reaponded, hearing me going through some talking struggles.

"Um, yes, I am just eating my breakfast now, and it's gotten stuck. Do what you went there to do and return as fast as you can. It's my..."

She interrupted me in between my sentences. "I know it is your birthday next week, honey. We will celebrate as fast as I return. I promise!"

I nodded but didn't say anything. She took a big breath in and said, "Look, Alice, you may have a birthday party with Nadia at Liam's place. I trust him, he is responsible enough to manage it, without bigger problems occurring with the celebration. I know him from before and..."

"It's okay, mum; we will celebrate after you return. For now, we will have a picnic or something. Nadia would certainly like that!" I concluded my mother's words. "I am not mad or disappointed; we will manage something. I love you, and take care of yourself."

"Okay, thank you. We will have a nice mother-daughter conversation as I return. I have so much to tell you, and right now I can't yet. It not appropriate over the phone anyways." She tried to explain her plans.

"I understand!" I tried to calm her down as possible, but at the other hand I was really curious what was so important going on with my father, that was worth of missing my birthday.

"I love you, Alice. Be safe!" Mum's voice sounded sad and tired. From my point of view, she had a lot on her plate, and she needed a solution. She was a great lawyer, and she worked with her heart.

The phone connection ended, and Sam was coming my way with a smile on his face. "I guess we will hang out for another fourteen days."

"You are updated, I see!" I smiled.

"Yeah, that was Liam. He was worried about our disappearance this morning. I explained our whereabouts, and he told me about the absence of your mother." He said and went towards the squirrels to feed them.

I nodded, and right when I was about to make another bite, Nadia video-called. "Good morning, sleepyhead, time to wake up!"

"I am already awake and on a walk through Hyde Park. You were still snoring in your room when we left. Grab Liam, and you both join us here!" I showed her the beautiful ambience of the park.

"We sure will, just after breakfast!" She said, pointing to freshly made pancakes on her plate. Then she switched the screen, and there was him, smiling. Just one glance at him and my memory brought me back to Friday.

I remembered his kisses and his warm touch. The look in his eyes was telling me, he wanted only me and no one else, and I wanted him.

If I could rewind back to the previous week, there would definitely be a good explanation why I gave everything to that man in such a short time, but that's impossible.

I can only rewind my memories of his green eyes staring at me while I entered his apartment. I can see his warm smile when he didn't care about my onion-like conversation or the activity; he was so funny and so handsome.

#

Tuesday was the most boring day for me and Sam. We were home watching Netflix the whole day; he was too lazy to go around London, and I didn't want to walk alone around unknown places.

It started with popcorn and a game named Truth or Dare.

"You wouldn't dare to play this game!"said Sam, laughing.

"I have never been a daring person, but I have always told my truth!" I answered to give him a hands-up about what could possibly happen.

"Alright, let's see... truth or dare?" He accepted my challenge.

"TRUTH!" I answered immediately.

He smiled.

"I am an open book!" I added.

"We will see about that! Tell me, what is your most embarrassing moment in front of a guy you like?" He started big, I guess he wanted to know all of my little dirty secrets. Liam was his brother and I wasn't comfortable talking about him with Sam.

"I stopped talking... I was just staring at him." My face was probably whole red; I had certainly felt the heat coming up to my forehead. "Could we skip this one?" I begged him.

He nodded, with a large smile on his face.

"Your turn then, truth or dare?" I said, hoping I read his face expression right.

"A dare, definitely!" he answered and put his glasses back up his nose. For a geek as he presented himself, he was a daring person. I didn't imagine he got it in him.

"I dare you to find Liam's beer hiding spot. It is not in this fridge." I pointed to the kitchen refrigerator.

"No, it's not! He has a mini refrigerator in the basement of this house. Me and my friend Adam went down there so many times, and after, we returned what we drank so he didn't notice," he smiled.

"You said DARE. Now you are telling me your story!" I giggled.

"Well, you remind me of my brother's beer so, you know what, I will bring us something good!" He said that and went down to the basement. He returned with a six-pack of beer.

"I dare you to join me!" he said, teasing me.

He thought I wouldn't do it, but he didn't know, I had some fire deep inside me too.

"I haven't picked a dare. Anyway, how did you and Adam get the beer to fill it in?" I asked to confuse him a little.

"Take a dare, and I will tell you the truth!" He laughed and winked.

"Done. I am not afraid of a pint!'' It took all my bravery, but I will do it. At this moment, I really love the fact that I stayed at Liam's house for this week. It made me grow, I  explored my deepest feelings and fears. I felt different, more alive than ever. I tapped into Alice; I had never been before, and because of my mother, I wouldn't dare to be. I respected her hard work and her dedication to me. She was a single mother for more than ten years, and she gave me everything she could.

Now I have to explore for myself; I need to find out who I really am.

"Amazing, you smashed that can in half an hour. Are you alright?'' I asked Sam; he was just smiling at me and said nothing.

"Truth or dare?" was his answer to my question after he opened another can.

"The truth!" I said it again.

I was juggling in my mind if I was brave enough for a dare, but my mind was still clear after a few slurps of beer, so I decided for the truth. I can handle it, but a dare would be a more difficult option for me.

"Tell me, what do you think about my brother?" He said it with a devilish smile on his face.

"What? He is nice!" I answered explosively, trying to cover up that his question had influence on me.

"Just nice? I have seen how you look at him!" He didn't stop teasing me.

"Oh, come on, Sam! You know I didn't." I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Right!" He has this big, weird smile, like he knows what I am feeling.

I blushed and my heart was pounding. I had no idea how to respond to him and hide my feelings towards his brother. "Em, that is none of your business!"

His smile got even wider. "I know it and you need to drink!"

"Why?"I asked.

"It's embarrassing, for starters. Well, it's not. My brother, it's a nice man. He is too old for you! You are a miner!" He said and winked.

I rolled my eyes and made a bug slurp of my beer; it got almost stuck in my throat. I caught it out.

"There, there, it's not so bad... I think he likes you too, and this secret is safe with me. Whatever you two planned to do!" He wiggled his eyebrows like something bad was on my mind.

I rolled my eyes again.

"There is nothing going to happen, I can assure you that!" I said that and cleaned my throat again.

"Right? Nothing!"he winked. "It's your turn to give me the truth or a dare" he added.

We played the game for another hour, and many secretive things were out there on display. Sam got his answers, but he already knew everything. He was a smart kid, just like me.

I liked to hang out with Sam in the Maldives and here, but all I could think about was his brother, from the very first second I stepped into this house. He got me with that question, and I didn't want to give him a straight answer, so we drank.

The six-pack wasn't enough for us, because Sam certainly knew how to drink. After we emptied the cans, he went to his bedroom and fell asleep like a baby. I was making myself some food to stop the spinning around in my head. Right after I ate my sandwich, I heard the doors opening.

Liam came through looking amazing, no matter how shaggy his hair was. He must have had a crazy night out, but definitely not as much as I did. Thoughts clouded my mind, and as soon as he turned towards me, I smiled. He looked surprised at me being awake, but he didn't mind.

In the next few minutes, many things happened. I imagined his soft lips kissing mine. I imagine his hands holding me and these clothes; there were too many of them. I made a courageous move, but he stopped me after a kiss and went to his room. I guess it was only in my head—that perfect moment.

#

Wednesday night, he held my hand all the way through the scary house, and he definitely saved me from that creepy zombie.  Before Wednesday, I have never felt as safe as I do with him and when we got out of that house, I wanted to thank him with a hug, but our eyes matched, and we couldn't help getting closer. I had felt his breath, and I immediately looked at his lips; like I said a few days before, they did look kissable. I was hypnotised, getting closer until our lips were sealed with a warm and soft kiss. My heart was racing, and my mind was completely blank. I enjoyed the moment; it's hard to describe what I felt, but I wouldn't think twice about doing it again.

Then the silence falls. After two days of complete ignorance, he didn't say good morning to me. I felt like he was completely elsewhere with his mind, and I thought we had something. What was I thinking? Next week it will be my seventeenth birthday, and he is older.

Thursday and Friday I was alone with my books, trying to figure out things in my head. Well, I figured them out without thinking of it. It went quite well, and Sam ordered an Uber. We had a relaxing time for the end of the week.

Friday evening has changed everything. I thought I would die, and it shook me to my bones. Then I found out that he really did care about me. He did everything for me to feel safe, and I did feel safe with him. I felt loved and adored; his kisses were the proof and a promise for the future.

The next day, when I woke up, my mind was still filled with his adoration, but without any alcohol in my blood, I could see the dark side of this relationship. He was 24 years old, and I was still a minor. Tomorrow my mother will be home, and I shouldn't tell anyone about what happened. "How will I keep this secret from my mother?" I whispered.

I stand up and collect all of my clothing from the flor and dress up quickly. I took a really long, warm shower -It helped me to think. After a shower, I headed  towards the kitchen with a plan for a major conversation with Liam.

He was still asleep in his room, so my big confrontation plan failed. I didn't want ant to wake him up and make everything more awkward that it already was.

I checked on Nadia, she was snoring in her room, only Sam was awake and ready for breakfast in the City of London.
#

That was my last week's overview, and now there are two more weeks before us. Liam was very smiley on Nadia's video call, so I guess it didn't bother him much, and I needed that conversation badly, to be sure we were on the same page.

"What could have happened?"were my thoughts while sitting on a Hyde Park bench with Sam.

"Nadia could help!" I said it softly.

"Help you with what?" Sam asked, I guess I said it loud enough for him to hear.

"Oh, nothing; I was just thinking out loud! I can't wait for Nadia to come here and see this beautiful park!" I smiled, and in the distance, I saw Liam and Nadia coming towards us.

Liam

"Hello, runaways!" I said and smiled at Sam and Alice.

She rolled her eyes and stood up from the park bench to hug Nadia.

"No hugs for me?" Nadia took me in a hug, and Alice took in Sam, so it's become a big family slush with friends hug. Girls giggled all the way through it, which annoyed me, but I held in there.

"Careful what you wish for!" I mumbled.

"What have you said?" said Sam, strengthening the hug.

"Alright, that's enough! I got my hug!" TI said loud and clear, they loosened their grip, and we were on our way through the park.

Princess Diana's statue with kids, the Queen's statue, many trees, and adorable squirrels I have been here so many times, alone with my guitar under the trees or making some noise with friends. Being here with Alice felt completely different, like we were at za te the right place and time.

After we fed squirrels and chased a few ducks, we decided to take a walk to Covent Garden and make museum visits on the way.

Refreshment after three hours spent in museums was like a song to my soul. I ordered Honest Burger with extra bacon and a pint of beer.

"Dreams do come true!" Were my words before I dug into my burger.

"Oh, they definitely do!" Alice answered, licking mayo from her lips. "The taste of this burger really is honest! she added.

"And this vegetarian... mmm... you know!" Nadia mumbles with a full mouth.

"How can you eat that? That's not even the meat!" Sam was puzzled by a vegetable that tastes like meat.

"I can, because it's good! No animal got hurt by this!" Nadia made another big bite and grinned.

Sam rolled his eyes and started with his burger.

For a few moments, there were just noises of chewing and an "mmm" sound. They all seemed to be pleased with the food, but they spared themselves with the booze.

"No one is drinking a beer today?" I said this between our lunches and smiled.

"I'm good," said Nadia. "I got enough vodka for this month last night! I just want cold water. Really, really cold water!" She added and drunk up entire glass of iced water.

"You really look like you need the whole gallon of water for yourself." said Sam, grinning.

She rolled her eyes and turned away from him towards Alice. "When did you go to sleep last night? You weren't in your bed when I went to the bathroom at night."

"Hm, yes, we stayed in the dining room for an hour or so after you fell deep asleep in your bed. Sam fell asleep on a couch, and we played poker!" Alice said it with a seductive look in her eyes.

Nadia laughed, turning towards Alice. "You were definitely a winner!"

"It definitely was a win-win situation." I said it quietly.

"What?" said Nadia and Sam.

"Khm.. nothing. I won, and after we went to sleep, Probably I was in bed when you came by; you just didn't notice me, Nadia. Vodka worked quite well on you last night!" Alice wanted to refute all the assumptions, I guess she was not willing to share all the last nights activities with Nadia and Sam.

Alice picked up chips and dipped it in the sauce. I have almost told Sam and Nadia what happened between me and Alice last night. She has magnificently changed the subject of our debate. She definitely has magnificence in her and a lot of general knowledge.

She has been too wise for her age, and she proves it on many occasions, like this morning in the museum. But from a different point of view, she made a large "mistake" last night. Hopefully, she won't regret it.

Flashback two hours ago

We went to the British Museum and the Madame Tussauds.

She was standing in front of the statue from the Eastern Island, a replica of it. "Hey, dum dum, give me some gum gum!" I said that and smiled.

She looked at me twice. "It's still daytime, Liam! You need to wait for the night for that!" she winked at me.

I love to see her smile, even if I trigger it with a lousy joke. "I don't know if I want to see those to come alive." I pointed at mummified bodies laying around the room.

"Imagine that tablet would've been in the Madame Tussauds museum," said Sam from behind us. "We would have an overnight party with famous people!" he added and laughed.

"Dreams come true!" said Nadia, who came right back from the bathroom.

"Especially yours, Nadia; you know how to party and snoring in your bedroom after," said Sam, laughing.

"Yeah, because the sofa is so much better, right?" Nadia was a fierce Sagittarius; she wouldn't let Sam make fun of her.

I was never much of a fan of the horoscope, but those people just made it sound so obvious. Fierceness comes from Nadia, Sam's big heart of cancer, and Alice, who is different. I had a hard time figuring her out. She seemed to be a loner like me, deep inside her books and music. But she had another side; when she opened up to me, she was a highly capable and wise young woman, always in her deep thoughts.

Alice is more of a quiet person in the first place, but when she spoke, she seemed to be more of a person than she presented herself to be.

Me, I was just a weirdo, the alien of the pack. I usually overthought everything and get overwhelmed. I had a lot on my back. Mister Hollers was a bad person, and I needed to find my way towards a solution in this situation.

Great, now I was in the middle of the museum, thinking of my "family". I have to be strong for this and find out what happened to my parents. Mister Hollers wasn't an innocent man, and I need proof bigger than just a regular delivery.

"What are you thinking of so deeply?" Her voice brought me out of my thoughts and back to reality.

"Oh, just some job-related things. Tomorrow is a Monday, and I need to resolve some issues. Nothing for your beautiful head to think about!" I answered and hugged her around the shoulders.

"Did you just say I am beautiful?" she said, poking her finger between my ribs.

"Stop it!" I said that and barely drifted away from her.

"Don't say you are ticklish." She said with a big smile on her face that she was incredibly beautiful, and I couldn't hide that feeling from her anymore.

I guess my face was all red because I felt the warmth coming up from my neck line. She gave me a little hug, but she squeezed me firmly, and then she walked away.

Some weird feeling of emptiness overflowed me when she went away. It felt like I needed her next to me to be complete. I shook my head and concentrated on the statue before me.

My head seemed to be full with this underage relationship and Mister Hollers demands. I felt like I was losing my mind. I needed to do something, but it was too hard to process everything right now. "I need a beer, '' I said softly.

"Not before the wax museum! You need to earn your beer!" said Sam, taking my hand. He was dragging me behind him until we came to the exit of the museum.

Alice and Nadia were waiting outside. "Wau, you are fast; when did you manage to get through the museum?" I asked surprised.

"While you were staring at that statue!" Nadia responded.

I raised my brows. "I guess I lost the feeling of time pom there!"

Alice nodded and smiled. She put her hand around Nadia's shoulders, and they went to a coffee shop. They brought us all a cup to go.

"How do you know what I like?" I questioned Alice when she brought me my cup. She turned and pointed at Sam, and then I saw her big, beautiful smile again. Even if she brought me a nasty broth, I would take it at that moment.

Every single night before I went to sleep, I thought about how one woman could change my world like that. I couldn't see straight anymore. My mind was a complete blob, and she was responsible for it.

The house after lunch in Covent Garden

Nadia went home, and Sam met up with some of his friends. That meant me and Alice, home alone.

It's been the second week of the warmest August we have ever had in the United Kingdom. People here were used to the rain, and for now we have witnessed only one or two rainy days.

Walking down the neighbourhood alley with Alice, I heard many complaints about sweating and "week from hell" conversations. Nevertheless, I kind of liked it; I felt like the sun energised me with its shine and gave me some good vibes.

I smiled and looked at Alice; she was in her own world, thinking God knows what. I took her hand and squeezed it softly. She turned to me with surprise radiating from her eyes. I guess she held her breath for a second, but she kept her hand in mine. We haven't spoken, but what we felt was big enough to speak by itself.

Throughout our Park and Museum adventure, my thoughts fixed on her. Occasionally they have slipped on tomorrow's meeting with Mister Hollers, but Kenndrick sent me some major information a few moments ago and gave me a chance to breathe easier than in the last five years.

I got the name Sebastian Clarence Brown. He was supposedly part of Mister Hollers "family" before me and has done the same work as I did. The name was cleared from the company's records, but Kenndrick was known to be a very persuasive man when he wanted something.

I needed to talk with Alice before I went to Kenndrick for these documents and make our relationship something more. I wanted it to be something more; she deserved better than just occasionally or casually. She was much more than Kellie or Ann together.

"Hey, Alice, we should talk!" I said it softly, still holding her hand.

She smiled and nodded as she hoped for the conversation. "I agree; I was thinking a lot about... some things and..."

"Please proceed; I am listening." I answered fully, turning towards her. My eyes were wide open with the hope of a good result.

Alice smiled. "...and I think you had too. I have never done something like this before, and I have no idea where this is going. I need some clearance from you."

She definitely was a wise woman; she knew how to use her words properly, and she had a good sense of humour when it was necessary. This balance was extremely appealing to me.

"We began. How would I put this into words? We began our relationship drunk and reckless." Her face darkened, and the grimace told me that she didn't like my words, but I was planning to turn it around. " ,but I feel there is much more than that. I want to proceed the right way!" I concluded my thoughts.

Her eyes widened. "What do you mean?"

"Alice, what happened between us was wrong on many levels." She sighed and looked away from me. "Look at me, Al, I am trying to be honest!" She turned back, her eyes becoming watery. "I want to make it the right way for you! Let me take you on a date!" I concluded, wiping the tears collected under her eye.

"A date? But I thought, " she looked like she was puzzled with her thoughts.

"I am sorry, I started this conversation wrongly." I grinned. "I mean it! Would you give me pleasure and go on a date with me?" I asked softly, with a hope for her yea as an answer.

The soft breath left her mouth; I didn't notice she was holding it in. "Yes, I would love that!" She said that and hugged me firmly.

"What about tomorrow, after I take care of my work?" She looked me up from our hug and smiled. "It's a deal!"

I kissed her on the forehead and squeezed her back into my arms. "No, it's a date!"

We were holding each other for a few more moments, and then we walked into the house.

The sun was almost setting, and I invited her to a rooftop. Between our way up, I managed to take my guitar. She mustn't have missed the beautiful sunset, and I must've been right next to her.

Sound of guitar echoed from our rooftop and I couldn't be happier then I was back there. Not for a minute I thought it will soon all change and not for the better. I enjoyed life to the fullest and Alice was right there with me.