☆I never insult artists and songs you like on your books, don't do to mine.

Save Myself
(Ed Sheeran)

   He knocked three times on the door and stood there, both his hands tugged in his pocket to keep him away from the cold air that blew his hair.

   The door finally opened up and May Parker was on another side, as soon as she saw him they both smiled and she burst to her nephew for a hug.

   "Peter!"

   "Hey, May."

   "I didn't know you were coming! But welcome home... God, I've missed you so much." She welcomed Peter in, back to his house when he was fifteen.

   It brought back all the memories, all the smells of old days, all the life he left behind just for the sake of dreaming. He walked over the counter, inside a frame was a picture of him, his father, his mother.

   He picked it up and put it down.

   "I'm on a phone with a client right now, you mind waiting? You can walk around the house?" She asked.

   "Of course. Go ahead." He smiled softly and she walked away. Peter Parker looked around, this place seemed so much bigger when he was little, some furniture has been replaced.

He walked to his room, opened the rusty old knob up and looked inside, everything was just the way he left it.

On the very left side of the room, his very first piano was there, he removed the cover and sat down. Even after all these years, it was still working, the sound was a little off tune but it was good enough.

He laid his fingers on the notes and played something softly. The sunlight leaked through the window and revealed dust in the air, turned his brown eyes to look lighter. Lonely, was the word to describe the moment.

And so he sang a song he wrote last night, the only one ever since you left him with that getaway car a week ago.

🎧Play the song at this part🎧

"I gave all my oxygen to people that could breathe. I gave away my money and now we don't even speak."

"I drove miles and miles, but would you do the same for me? Oh, honestly?"

He stared off at his old room and he saw himself as a child through his memory.

"Offered off my shoulder just for you to cry upon. Gave you constant shelter and a bed to keep you warm."

"They gave me the heartache and in return, I gave a song."

It was all too much so he closed his eyes.

"It goes on and on."

   The song echoed in an empty hallway of his house.

   "Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels. I drown it with a drink and out-of-date prescription pills. And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf. No farewell."

   He thought of you.

   "So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself."

   He knew he fucked up, he knew he hurt people too, but in a sense, it didn't mean he had no heart, or that he was not in pain as well enough for it to break.

   "I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain. 'Cause human beings are destined to radiate or dream."

   May ended the call now, and so she followed the sound of the music with wonder.

   "What line do we stand upon 'cause from here looks the same? And only scars remain."

   She stopped at Peter's old room, and she watched her nephew from behind with her back laid to the wall.

   She knew of everything, of all the news and drama, of all the lies she can always pick up the truth. She knew that, to the media and everyone Peter was the bad guy.

   But to her, he was just a boy, a boy without a mother nor a father. A boy that try to act up for himself, try to be something,

   "But if don't." Peter's hair fell onto his face. "Then I'll go back." but his fingers were too concentrated on the notes. "To where I'm rescuing a stranger. Just because they needed saving just like that."

   "Oh, I'm here again. Between the devil and the danger. But I guess it's just my nature."

   "My dad was wrong. Cause I'm not like my mum. Cause she'd just smile and I'm complaining in a song."

   May's tears welled up.

   "But it helps. So before I save someone else. I've got to save myself."

   "Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels. I drown it with a drink and out-of-date prescription pills. And all the ones that love me they just left me on the shelf. No farewell."

   "So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself."

   "And before I blame someone else, I've got to save myself."

   He breathed in deep and slowly opened up his eyes.

   "And before I love someone else, I've got to love myself..."

   The room was left silent again, like all the years of its abandonment, Peter pushed himself away from the old piano, he stared off his old room and noticed May.

   "Why are you crying?" He asked confusedly and rushed to her. "You were listening?"

   She nodded as a reply and she pulled her in for another hug.

   "How was your ride chasing your dream?" She asked, sniffing.

   "Well..." He scoffed sadly about the song her just heard. "...Pretty much lonely."

   "Is that why you're coming home?"

   "I guess... I felt lost." He twisted his brows and looked away. "I felt far from home so I drove back here."

   "You got something wrong."

   "I got something wrong? About?"

   "Saving yourself doesn't mean pushing everyone you love away so you'll be on top, Peter." She put his messy hair in its place.

   "..."

   "Saving yourself means knowing which hands to hold, which person to hold on to when you're down, saving yourself is letting go of some of your goals and be something more for someone else you love."

   "But what if in the end, they leave me anyway? I mean... she left me."

   "And you never chase her down."

   "...Well, she stole my car."

   May slapped Peter on his head.

   "Not in that way! I meant every time you break her heart you just let her leave. And what's the problem left? Is fame that much important that you would rather live alone in sorrow forever than to at least have someone?" She was likely pissed, this was not how she raised him to be.

   "..." Peter had no answer for May or himself.

   "You let go of the only girl who can love the worst in you! You-- dumb-- silly-- nephew." She put her hands on her hips.

   "I'm sorry..."

   "Don't say that to me. Go say that to (Y/n)."

   "How...? I think she blocked my phone number."

   "How hard it can be to drive to her house? You know the address. Or if she's working call her assistant or Steve Rogers. And stop drinking beer it makes you stupid. I can smell it from here, geez." She pushed him out of the house.

   "I don't think she'll forgive me for all the shit I did to her."

   "But it's worth a try."

   Her advice gave him so much confidence, he was sure now, he didn't need any fame, no popularity, no award, no more movies, he finally letting go for he never knew the only thing that can save him was you.

   Dumb motherfucker. He called himself as he ran off to the street, getting in his car (the one you stole, Bucky drove it back for Peter) and started the engine.

   Felt like forever on the road, trying to make his way to you. Every second counted as it seemed the longer it took, the more you will completely give up on him.

   But all things have consequences.

   His phone ring.

   [MJ]

   "Ah... what now." He groaned then picked up. "Yes?"

   "Are you busy?" She asked him with a weak voice.

   "I am."

   "We really need to talk."

   "Later? I'm really busy. I just got back on track and it feels like waking up from a nightmare that I was a complete idiot in it." He ran through the red light.

   "This is very serious, Peter. You need to know this."

   "Just tell me right now."

   "Shit... fine."

   She stopped and Peter was waiting for the reply. "What is it?" He asked her again, but the reply was unexpected and it changed everything.

   "Peter. I'm pregnant." Said Michelle Jones.

🎧