The Snake, The Bomb, And The News


The scene changed to a giant snake-like demon blasting away in his flying machine laughing like a manic.

"Who's that?" Evie asked.

"That's Sir Pentious. He's alright sometimes." Harmony shrugged.

"Those cowardly sinners dare not interrupt my territorial takeover. A wise decision, the power of my machines are unmatched! No other demon can compare to the likes of I!" Sir Pentious hissed.

"Gee, that was pretty swell boss."

"Yeah!"

"Are those... eggs?" Carlos asked.

"Yep." Harmony replied. "He's an idiot sometimes but he's a genius inventor."

"You really showed them what for." Another egg said. "I like when you shot them with your ray gun."

"I wish he'd shoot me with his ray gun."

Sir Pentious rolled his eyes before he grinned big again. "At this rate, I will seize control of the entire west side of the pentagram by day's end. And nothing, not a single beast in this infernal of suffering will be able to take back this empire from my instrictive grasp."

"Oh boy!" One of the eggs shouted excited before falling flat on his face.

"And I thought my minions were idiots." Hades mumbled.

"Hell will be mine." Sir Pentious continued. "And everyone will know the name of Sir..."

"EDGE LORD!!" A female voice shouted.

"Pardon? Who said that?" Sir Pentious demanded before glaring at his minions. "What did you just say to me you fried chicken fetuses? Speak up!"

"That wasn't us Mr. Boss man." One of the eggs told him before a bomb broke his window and blew up smoke right next to him causing him to cough.

"You looking for a fight? Old man."

"Who's that freak?" Chad asked.

"Hey!" Angel stood up and glared at him. "That's my best gal pal and my baby's godmother!"

"Ignore the pumpkin head daddy." Harmony said gently pulling Angel back down to his seat.

"Why don't you get that tinker toy bullshit off my turf before I SMASH IT!" Cherri Bomb grinned as a piece of the ship broke. "More."

"Oh, you wanna go missy?" Sir Pentious asked. "Well, I'm happy to oblige!"

"HEY!" Angel shouted when the scene changed to the 666 News. "I wanted to see the fight."

"Calm yourself darling." Alastor told his spouse.

"Good afternoon, I'm Katie Killjoy."

"And I'm Tom Trench. Chaos down in Pentagram City today as a turf war is raging on the west side. Between notable king Sir Pentious and self-proclaim spunky powerhouse Cherri Bomb."

"That's right Tom. After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs. Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory."

Angel and Harmony both burst out laughing as Cherri breaks one of Pentious's egg men to put one of her bombs in it before getting a direct hit in Pentious's face.

"She's crazier than I thought." Hades said.

"Oh, you haven't even seen half of it dad." Harmony chuckled.

"Those two seem to really be going at it huh?" Tom continued.

"Looks like they're fighting tooth and nail for that hot spot." Katie added before actually seeing a real tooth and nail.

"And I'd sure like to nail her hot spot." Tom joked.

"You are a lip dick jack ass Tom." Katie chuckled. "Or should I say..." Katie dumps her coffee right onto Tom's crotch. "No dick."

Every guy in the room flinched.
"Damn. Bitch burned his cock." Angel said.

"I actually feel sorry for the guy." Hades admitted.

"Coming up next we have an exclusive interview with the daughter of Hell's own head honcho." Katie announced as a picture of Charlie appeared next to her. "Who's here to discuss her brand new passion project, all that and more after the break." She then turns to a whimpering Tom. "Suck it up you little bitch."

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