Seth's POV

"I'm a fucking idiot."

"No shit."

"How could I actually fuck up this bad?"

"I'm asking the same damn question."

"Am I even allowed to feel this bad right now?"

"Hell fucking nah-"

"Roman you are not helping at all." I shot at him as I half glanced at his figure laying in the bed across from me.

"I'm not trying to help." He shot me while sitting up on his elbows, "Last time I tried to help you, it ended up being a shit situation, and I lost my best friend."

"You didn't loose Dean." I say with a sigh, "If anything I'm about to loose Dean."

"No shit." He told me, "He better leave your ass."

"Roman!" I shouted at him.

"What?" He shouted back, "I'm mad right now! What do you expect me to say? I'm not about to sugarcoat a conversation with your ass, hell no. You cheated, and that's still my friend. And he's hurting, and knowing that I'm somewhat the cause of his hurt fucking kills me."

"Then how do you think I feel?" I mumbled as I turned my back to him.

"You probably feel like shit." He said, "But you brought it on yourself. So ask yourself, was it worth it?"

"Some friend you are." I mumbled as I placed a pillow over my head to block out his voice.

"Maybe it'll make us both feel better if we go out and strangle Styles." I heard Roman say in a mumbled tone, "What I wouldn't give to just wrap my hands around his neck and-"

I sighed as I pressed the pillow firmly against my ear. I wasn't in the mood for hearing Roman's threats to AJ right now.

I don't blame Roman for his attitude. He's upset. He's beyond upset, but the man won't cry in front of me. He'll only venture off to Randy every other hour and come back with reddened eyes and a even more grumpy perspective on the situation.

He was mad at me, but since we had to room together, he didn't really have a chance to keep his distance. And he definitely let me knew exactly how he felt, which I had to respect. He wasn't going to tell me everything was ok, because it wasn't right now.

As far as I go, I was a mess and I deserve every bit of it.

I hurt Dean. Even though I tried to bury every last part of the secret and stow it away, he still found out and I ended up looking like an ass.

You can't just bounce back from cheating. Loyalty defines a relationship. It's a trust thing and I decided to completely obliterate every bit of trust Dean has with me.

I don't have the right to say I'm upset, but I am.

Yes, I brought this on myself but I can still regret, and I swear I fucking regret this.

I should have just turn my back and kept walking. I should have ignored him instead of trying to prove myself. The only thing I proved to myself is that I'm a fucking dumbass.

I heard Roman groan, "Renee finally texted."

I groan as I sit up and rub my eyes, "What'd she say."

"A lot of curing." He said as he scrolled, "A lot of threatening. She added a 'I still love you like a brother but' kinda thing. In summary she's pissed."

"What are you doing?" I asked he he pressed a button and pressed the phone to his ear.

"Calling her." He told me, "I don't feel like texting back a long paragraph that I know she either a) won't respond or b) will respond with 'k' leaving me pissed off because I took my time to type out a full message."

I gave him a loom and he simply shrugged it off.

"She didn't pick up." He said with a sigh as he set the phone down, "She's probably with Dean."

"Or ignoring you." I told him.

"Either way, she's not picking up." He mumbled, "I'll try again in the morning. I'm probably too tired to have a conversation anyways."

I sighed and reached over to turn off my lamp, "Have a good night Roman."

"Have a bad night Seth."

"Really Roman?"

"I'm still bitter."