...

In the small dorm, there was me, Elise, Liam, Parker, Zayn, some girl called Winona, a blonde guy that I had never seen in my life, and—of course—Harry.

Once he saw me entering it was as if his eyes were to pop out of his head. I greeted all of them and when I came to Harry, all eyes were on me (especially Parker's). I shook his hand, but I only said hi. After that, I sat down on the bed between Winona and Elise. Next to Elise was Liam and next to Liam was Harry—so from where I was sitting I could only see his crotch, legs and hands.

When we were halfway through the movie, Elise and Liam both fell asleep, Elise's head hanging down in Liam's lap and Liam's head balancing against the wall. When they were sat in that position, I was finally capable of observing Harry's entire frame and face. And when everyone else was focused on what was happening in the movie, Harry and I looked at each other. I watched him slide his hand down his sweatpants.

My gut tightened at the sight. Underneath the fabric, he was running his hand back and forth. I had to force myself to look away in order to prevent myself from growing in my own pants—but as I felt him staring even more intensely I looked back at him, gaining a wink from his left eye. I cracked a smile, covering my mouth to stifle my chuckle.

When the movie was over I woke Elise up and left the room with her tiredly clinging onto my arm. I lead her back to her dorm and tucked her into her bed—even though it was only five pm—and hurried back to my own dorm. Niall was there, but I decided not to tell him what I had just been up to.

What I did tell him was that I had hooked up with Harry the day before. Unfortunately, it didn't really surprise him at all—he said he had been waiting for it to happen. He then asked me how it was and I told him the honest truth. That managed to shock him.

"The best you've ever had?!"

"Without a doubt."

...

I had grown quite fond of Harry after that day, but it all went back to square one the following Wednesday. I was standing at my locker with Caleb when I spotted the curly-headed heartthrob visibly flirt with a shorter girl a few metres away. He was smirking, touching her hair, and soon enough placing kisses on her neck.

Was that even allowed in public?

The girl was giggling when his hands slid from her shoulders to her hips. I frowned as he leaned in to kiss her on the lips. Soon enough they were making out—and I couldn't keep my eyes off of them. Harry's lips were tightly pressed around hers, their tongues colliding as he opened up wider. He sucked her lip simultaneously to the motion of his hand traveling down to her arse.

"Louis?"

I blinked, turned to Caleb and cleared my throat. He frowned at my expression and I fixed my fringe, closed my locker and adjusted the books in my arms.

"What's up?"

"We have class in one minute, come on."

...

Later the same day I got a text from Harry that I ignored. He was asking me to come to his dorm, and even though I—for once—had all the time in the world, I decided not to. Seeing him with other people only reminded me that I was doing it for all the wrong reasons.

...

The same day Caleb started hanging out with that girl he hooked up with in a bathtub, I started losing hope. Sure, Liam and Elise were not perfect, but they were still hanging out and texting constantly. Adeline seemed happier with her boyfriend than she had ever been before, and I was just busy trying my best to get good grades. My bullet point 'Find love' did not seem so promising.

Niall, on the other hand, was skipping classes and sleeping the days away.

In history class I sat next to Emma and she helped me catch up on the parts that I had been missing out on when I had skipped. After that lesson, I felt like I was somehow back on track—so when I got back to the dorm that afternoon I avoided planning to spend the entire rest of the day studying. I sat down at the end of Niall's bed, patted him on top of the duvet and tried to shake him awake.

"Buddy. You have to cheer up. I brought your favourite sandwich."

That sentence normally would've caused him to jump up from his position, but instead he just squeezed his eyes open and groaned. His hair was all over the place and his face was—if possible—paler than I had ever seen. Seeing him like that killed me on the inside.

"Please eat it. It's chicken curry."

Niall sat up a little and took the tin-foiled baguette from my hand and unwrapped it, to my advantage. He took a bite and I finally felt like I could breathe again. I hadn't seen him chew on anything but his lip for almost three days.

"She has been asking about you."

He looked up and spoke with his mouth full, "Has she, really?"

"Yes. I've told them all that you're sick, but they're still worried."

"Elise is worried?"

I smiled. "Is that so hard to believe?"

"How is she?"

"She's fine, but she's bored of Liam, like I said," Niall took another bite of the sandwich—Thank God his appetite was returning. I continued, "I reckon you could swoop in and take his place."

"What if Liam gets really angry? He's much stronger than me."

I snorted. "He wouldn't hit you."

"How do you know?"

"He's a softie. I've spoken to him quite a few times now. Besides, I don't even think he's that interested in her."

Niall's eyes expanded. "What? Why?"

"I think..." I smiled to myself. "I think he's into Zayn."

Niall made a face, and then he smiled. "Really? Why would you think that?"

"It's just this vibe I'm getting."

"So, you think he's gay?"

"I don't know—I just don't think he's straight as a pole, if you know what I mean."

Niall ate some more of his baguette, his face slowly but surely lighting up the more we talked. He said, "Have you been getting any while I've been sleeping?"

"Nah," I huffed. "I'm getting a little impatient, though."

"You've been holding back?"

"Mm-hm." I nodded. "I started doubting whether or not keeping it up with Harry was the right thing to do, but since the day we had sex I've just been getting more needy for every day."

"I don't think you should hold back. If it's the best sex you've ever had, sex him all you want," he spoke with his mouth full of food and I smiled.

"Yeah." My phone buzzed in my hand and I watched the familiar name pop up on the screen. "Speak of the devil."

HARRY: It's been a week...

ME: Sorry. I've been busy.

I hadn't been.

HARRY: Are you busy now?

ME: Yes.

HARRY: What are you doing?

ME: Hanging out with Niall.

HARRY: Wouldn't you rather have me suck your dick?

My tummy tingled.

ME: I'd love that but not now.

HARRY: You'd love that?

ME: Yes I would.

HARRY: That's good to know.

"What's he saying?" Niall said, swallowing the last piece of his baguette.

"He wants me to come over."

"Go!" Niall nudged my arm.

"No, I haven't..." I chuckled, blushing a little. "I would need to take a shower first, and shave, and wear something nice..."

"Aw, you wanna look good for him?"

I smiled shyly, scrunching my nose. "Is that weird?"

"No. I would freak if Elise came here now. I mean, look at me."

"You look cute. You're just pale," I said. "Besides, that's different. You're like in love with Elise. I'm just horny."

"Promise me to stop holding back. Okay?" He raised his brows. "You were so happy when you told me about shagging him the first time. I wanna see you that happy all the time."

"I wanna see you happy, too."

Niall sighed. "Only one thing can make me happy."

We were both quiet for a moment before I spoke up, "Do you ever fantasise about her?"

He grinned mischievously. "Sometimes."

"Continue doing that. That'll make it easier. And then when the time is right, you'll be holding the real thing right here in this bed."

His eyes expanded. "You're getting me too excited."

"I'm just rooting for you two."

"You should say something about me." He smiled shyly.

I shone up. "I can do that? For real?"

"Yes. I don't care anymore," he said, but he clearly did care. He was just desperate about making it work. He continued, "Tell her I said something about her. I don't know—Tell her something nice."

I patted his knee comfortingly, smiling proudly. "I'll do it tomorrow."

...