Chapter 17: Painful Memories

The Next Day

Ruki's P.O.V

Seeing her smiling face when I held her,

Her worried face when I feared the worst,

Even at times the surprising ones,

The same with the comforting ones,

Our kiss and the love we shared,

That was why I married her.

To experience this pain, it was nothing to feel good about. I loved her and yet all she did was move on. I could never do that. Even when I had Lucy I only ended up hurting her and shutting myself in. Why was I like this? I looked at the sleeping woman next to me. Why couldn't I be happy? She was with me again and yet I felt that Lucy would be disappointed.

Three Hours Later

Lucy's P.O.V

I woke up to the annoying sound of my alarm. It's screeching always seemed to get the best of me this early in the morning. I got out of bed and slid on my slippers before leaving my room to start breakfast.

As I came into the hall Ruki's door opened. I for some reason felt happiness. Maybe he can help with breakfast "Thanks a lot, Ruki-kun." That voice, why did it sound so familiar? Out came Ruki and Yui in a cheerful manner, just like the picture, they appeared happy.

 Why did my heart ache to see this? To feel such agony and not even know the meaning of it, was that meaningless? "Yui if you two ever get into another argument, you know where to go." Why would he do that? She smiled before she nodded. Ruki opened the door and let her out, saying another see you later before he closed the door.

"What is it?" He looked at me. "You appear angry."

"Huh?"  

"You didn't do anything but stand there, meaning that you were frozen in your spot. So what is it this time?"

"You are hurting yourself you know."

 "What do you mean?" He walked into the living room. That look he had, he knew what I meant but wanted to hear it. "Come here" I followed his orders before speaking.

 "Having her come even though you are still healing, letting her sleep in your bed, even inviting her back instead of encouraging her to work it out with Shin, you are hurting yourself. " His look became full of anger.         

"So I should let her be by herself even though she is in that condition?" What did he mean by that?

"What condition?" His eyes widened before he looked away from me.

"It's none of your concern."

"My concern, if anything it has everything to do with my concern. I made a promise to help you."

"Selfish"

"Selfish?"

"Your request, it sounds selfish when all I wanted you to do was work for me. Not for you to tell me what I can and can't do."

"I want you to be happy, not for you to be in pain again. Do you even remember the things you told me every night you visited me after drinking, every drunken night I heard your pain and felt so useless, so now I want to help you and all you are doing is ignoring my help. "

"So"

"Why else do you think I am doing this, for my benefit!?! Who the hell do you think I am to do that! I care okay?!? How selfish do you think I am?!?" His eyes widened at my words. His eyes were not bitter nor alarmed if anything they were overwhelmed. Would I be in trouble after this? Would it be worse than usual? I yelled at him and even went as far as using profanity. I insulted him and yet all-

"You feel that way?" I slowly nodded.

"I want you to get better." His cold eyes for once in months had life in them. I didn't know if it had been from my words or from seeing Yui today. It was hard to tell.

"Fine" He stood up. "Get started on breakfast. I have something to do." He left. For some reason, the house became cold. I wanted to make sure he was fine so I ran out of the house only to see that he was not there. He was nowhere and I couldn't help but feel worried.

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