Chapter 31: Words Thrown Back
How long has it been now? Annalise wonders. Minutes? Hours? Days? Everything is blurring together and no matter where she goes, she's stuck with her double.
Whenever she runs out of her house and races down the street, her double reappears ahead of her. She is always smiling but her eyes are glassy and dead.
"Where are you going?" she asks. "Are you trying to leave me? Why would you leave me? Isn't YouTube good enough for you?"
Annalise can't get out.
Circa's abandoned body stares at her from every angle, always watching blankly, always smiling, mocking in her silence. Annalise tries to hide, tries to keep her grip on sanity, but with every doppelgänger that appears, she feels herself slipping.
"I just want to go home," she whimpers. "Please, just leave me alone."
"This is your home!" Fake Annalise laughs. "It's better than your home! You can spend your days making videos for your adoring public without all the stress of school and your mom and friends!"
"I want school! I want my friends and my mom!" Annalise insists.
"No, no, you really don't get it," scolds the copy. "What you want is YouTube. You kept Circa out with that antivirus wipe so long ago so obviously, you love it enough to stay." She reaches out to hug Annalise. "I'll be your new friend, your new family! All you need is yourself!"
Annalise shoves her away. "NO!" she shouts. "No, I need others, I...I-I need my mom! I need Mikey..."
Fake Annalise's face crumples with anger. "You...don't...need...them..." she repeats as she snatches Annalise's arm, dragging her closer to her with an iron grip.
"L-Let me go," Annalise pleads.
"We're happy here, together," she whispers. "Come and play with me some more."
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"No!"
Leonardo crosses his arms over his plastron, shaking his head vigorously from side to side, and Sarina mimics his body language. She sizes him up, eyes flashing.
"Leonardo, this is the only way. I swear, I can do this," she says, an edge of a whine lilting her tone.
"We already lost Annalise in there," he retorts. "We can't lose you too."
She tilts her head back to the ceiling. "My, none of you have even an ounce of faith in my abilities," she says.
She looks back at the gathered group. Leonardo keeps his stern expression. Raphael, Destiny, and Diaval linger in a group, stuck in varying states of conflict, and Donatello lingers at Sarina's side, less than pleased. Michelangelo stays off to the side, t-phone clutched in his hand, and Master Splinter strokes his beard and observes in silence.
"Not like that," Diaval says. He looks between his hands as if they're two sides of a scale. "Just sounds...'mpossible."
"What is so impossible about plugging me back into the teleporter and allowing my subconscious to travel back into Youtube with Circa?" Sarina asks. Nothing but defiance lingers on her face and Diaval blinks in confusion. "Without my subconscious mind, I should remain in a comatose state. Then, when I rescue Annalise, I destroy Circa once and for all, return home, and..." She gestures like a performer during the casting call. "Voila! Two birds, one stone."
"And if the whole thing bombs?" Raphael asks. "If Circa destroys whatever 'you' is in cyberspace, then what? We leave you on a table to sleep forever?"
"No. I imagine I would waste away, being effectively brain-dead. There are probably chemicals that would prove fatal should they be injected—"
"Hey, woah! Slow the hell down," Destiny barks, making Diaval startle. The wolf-raven's eyes narrow as she takes a step towards Sarina, wings spreading. "You can't ask us to do that. We can't kill you."
"I will be dead in every sense of the word. You would be helping me on my way," Sarina states, eyes flashing, and Donatello pales a little at the thought. "But, that is the worst case scenario. I will not fail."
"This is all theory," Leonardo says. "What if your subconscious doesn't travel? What if Circa doesn't leave your head and that's it? This entire thing would chalk up to—"
"A big...fat...failure," Raphael finishes, earning a glare from his brother.
"I will find a way," Sarina says with a smile. "I cannot explain everything."
"I think you should try, for our sake," Donatello says.
She purses her lips. "Well, I can't. Mostly because I haven't planned out anything past getting into the cyberverse."
Everyone except Splinter, Diaval, and Michelangelo let out a resounding, "YOU'RE WINGING IT?!"
Sarina blinks. "Yes, basically. Is that difficult to understand?"
Everyone groans. Master Splinter lowers his hand from his beard as a long breath passes his lips. His aged russet gaze sweeps over his children, his students, and he feels his heart grow heavy.
"I am not fond of the uncertainties that come with this plan, but," he says, "I have no power over Sarina and her actions. Above that, Annalise must be rescued and as of now, we have only one plan."
Silence blankets them as uncertain looks bounce from turtle to wolf-raven back to turtle to human. Just as it starts to become stifling, a soft, choked voice breaks it.
"Annalise shouldn't have gotten caught up in this," Michelangelo whispers, his eyes teary as he stares at the screen. "She's...she's trapped and, maybe...maybe if I had left her alone, if I wasn't such an idiot—"
"Mikey, this is all Circa's doing," Sarina says, starting toward him with a comforting smile. "Once I save her—"
"If you try to save her, you could die!" Michelangelo interrupts, tears starting to roll down his freckled cheeks. "I don't want to lose you too, Sari! I'd miss you too much! We all would!"
Sarina freezes in place, eyes flashing, and Michelangelo wipes at his face. His eyes are getting redder by the second and the emotion pouring from him leaves his brothers speechless. Diaval makes a soft noise in his throat and reaches up to touch his chest, hand shaking.
"If I hadn't been so obsessed with her, she'd be okay. She'd be at home with her mom and Pepper and she'd be happier," Michelangelo continues, anger and heartbreak mixing in his words and voice. He points at Raphael, finger shaking. "You were right, Raph, I ruin everything. I'm just...just a big screw-up. I need to grow up and take a look at reality because no human will ever give a crap about me. No one will ever truly love...m-me...n-not like how I l-love her..."
Raphael stiffens, joints locking up as guilt smacks him across the face. Michelangelo cries harder, his mask growing splotchy with tears.
"I'm an idiot. Why...why would a girl like Annalise ever want a g-guy like me? I d-did nothing but bug her and m-make her do things that s-scared her and, and now she's..." He hunches over, breathing hard. "I m-messed it all up like I always do. I...I can't lose m-more people. I c-can't."
He turns and runs from the lab, his wails gaining even more volume, a rainfall turned thunderstorm. Diaval sinks to the ground, his expression stricken and paler than ever, and Destiny's hand hovers over his shoulder.
"Michelangelo!" Splinter calls, but his youngest son is long gone.
Diaval mumbles something incoherent, hugging one arm to his chest as he squeezes his eyes shut. "G-God..." he mumbles.
"Diaval, what...what did you see?" Destiny whispers, ears flattening against her hair.
The man shakes his head. "Strong...strong feelings. Strong...'nd sad. So, so sad."
Raphael pulls out his own t-phone and opens it up to YouTube. The video that shows the true nature of Annalise's confinement is easy to find. She keeps running, never escaping, and Raphael grits his teeth. He squares his shoulders, gripping the phone tighter as he turns around. His family stares at him, expectant, but his focus is on Sarina.
"Okay, giggles, I don't know about everyone else, but I'll help you," he says. "For Annalise. For Mikey."
Sarina smiles a little. "I will need time to prepare." She turns to the only ones left: Destiny, Leonardo, Diaval. "Will you help me?"
Leonardo and Destiny look at each other. Destiny purses her lips, but she nods, and Leonardo exhales as he closes his eyes. He, too, nods, and Diaval manages a shaky thumbs up as he rises back to his feet.
"Thank you," Sarina says. "Now, there is work to be done."
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