*Dave's POV*

The mermaid was most defiantly not some mild little damsel in distress. What a mouth on her, she was not afraid to get onto me. Yah maybe I did snap but someone was for sure going to notice she didn't belong here. If anyone came over to the house, which was unlikely, but if they did there was no way they wouldn't see the FUCKING mermaid in the pool out back, the pool was probably the only reason anyone would come over anyways so if we just said it was broken or something it would be cool right? There was the chance that the Lalond girls would still try and come over though and that could be a problem.

"bro get the door I got a handful of mermaid!" I was broken from my thoughts by my big bro yelling and Jake putting his hand on my shoulder so I wouldn't trip on the steps. I fished around in my pockets for the keys and unlocked the door, holding it open for my bro and Jake then shutting it behind me and running to the back door that led to the pool.

We all helped getting her situated, there was a small bench thing in the deep end so she wouldn't have to put any strain on her tail. As good a job as Jake did with wrapping it up, if it's anything like a leg it needed to rest. Jake sat and talked to her for a bit while me and Dirk got some lunch ready .

"So like, I wanna say tuna sandwiches are out of the question but maybe that's all mer-people eat" Dirk said, staring into the pantry "vegetables should be safe right? Or are fish like dogs and can't eat some shit"

"Dude don't feed her fish food or anything! Let's just grab some chips" I whisper yell and grab some Cheetos and potato chips and head out.

She was talking with Jake so I don't think they saw me so I just sit with them. "So are chips cool with you guys?" I ask and Jake is holding in laughter I can just tell. Mermaid chick looked just as confused as me when he busts out in a fit of laughter. He was laughing so loudly that Dirk ran out to make sure everything was okay.

"What the hell? What's so funny?" He asked and now we were all confused by Jake.

"FISH AND CHIPS!!" He shouts breathlessly at last and me and Dirk share a look and give a simple chuckle.

"I still don't get it" she says and looks at all of us "and anyways I'm only half fish" she says holding up her hands as if to prove it. At that Dirk lets out an actual laugh and Jake smiles a little at that. She looks around a little annoyed "if you're going to mock me I'd really at least rather know why" she huffs. And Jake smiles at her and calmly explains the pun.

They get along really well. It kind of made me feel out of place but it's not like anyone's actually excluding me.

"So um... here's some food" I said at a break in the conversation and hand them a bag of chips and sit by the pool with Jake.

"We aren't sure what a normal mer-person diet consists of so this might have to do for tonight" Dirk says, sitting on the other side of Jake. She nods and reaches a hand into the bag and pulls out some chips and snacks on them.

"This is fine. I normally eat fish, plants that grow in the ocean, things like that but I don't think I'd have any problem with human food" she explains, it was nice that she trusted us a bit more. Jake is a pretty oblivious to some things but he can be really calming. She was getting used to the pool now and just flexing her tail. It looked painful but I don't know what tails would feel like.

"I fucking told you tuna would have been okay" Dirk says jokingly and gets up and gets her a floaty. "Here, this will float so you can put your weight on it. I'm not sure about tails but legs need to rest after an injury" she nods and takes it. It's a little silly but she looks cute with it.

"We should probably get you like a swimsuit top or something though cause wet t-shirts aren't known for being exactly modest midriff covers" Jake said and then frowns "do you think Roxy would mind lending us one?" He continued and Dirk shrugs "best way to find out is to ask" Dirk said taking out his phone and dialing up the Lalond girls to ask for a girls bathing suit. As soon as those words came out of his mouth we could all hear Roxy squealing and asking what size he was. We all started laughing and before he could say it wasn't for him she had hung up staying Tay she could just bring all of her swimsuits over. True to her word, no less then five minutes later Roxy AND Rose both come barging in through the back fence with two bags of swimsuits each.

"HEY DICKY! *DIRKY!" Roxy calls and jade ducks under the pool floaty just in time "I thought maybe Jake or Dave might want to try in some too so I said screw it and had rose bring all of hers too!!" She squeals and Jake turns so red I thought he would explode

"Say strider, what do you think your new interests in women's clothing stems from? Would you say you ever felt at any time that women got more then you did?" Rose asks in her calm monotone voice, glancing at me over the top of her sunglasses and raising one pale blond brow. "If you feel more comfortable as a woman it is safe to say so, we are all your friends and this is a safe place" she said, the ting of joking gone from her voice.

"No Lalond I'm not wearing women's clothing now. You'll have to go somewhere else to get your psychoanalytical jollies off, to get your psychotherapy fix, get that psychoanalyst nut out" I tease letting her know she didn't cross any lines. She cracks a smile and nods "you made two sexual references, would you say you feel sexually repressed? You know Dave masterb-"

"AGH LALOND YOU WIND OKAY!?" I yell to interrupt her and she chuckles "fine fine, so in any case why does Dirk need swimming suits?" "Why does Dirk do anything? He's a master of irony, I doubt we mere mortals could ever understand" I say with a sad shake of my head.

"So it wouldn't have anything to do with the thing in your pool?"