THE FIRST TIME MET YOU

When i look into your eyes its different.

Spending my time with you is fun.

Our first date, I was babbling things about me telling you stories although you were quiet i know you were listening to me intently.

I was excited and nervous meeting you again because it's been a while since i saw you, when we saw each other in highschool all we do is say hi and hello how are you?

I do hope you appreciate when i try to look pretty when i see you.

I never thought i would have this kind of fun with you.

I didn't know when it started it seems like a dream when you confessed to me on the phone it made me speechless and now you are courting me.

When we had already dated few times now, spending time with you was special and its kinda hard to explain.

I remember when i asked you about your first impression to me.

You said to me my compassion to my family and friends , positive attitude, and you can just chill being with me. you can show your true self.

You also told me it turns you on when a girls has a smile on her face.

I have trust issues because of what happened with my parents.

I tend to really know the person before i give my trust.

I was so glad you came to my birthday and i was going to introduce you to my lovely mom.

You were interrogated by her and my friends although i was dissapointed with your answer but it doesn't change what i feel about you.

I was scared at that time that you might say that you wonwt continue your courtship of me.

I didn't expect that you will give me a gift on my birthday. it was cute white bear.

When we saw each other again. you said you were thinking twice to continue or not.

I remember when i met your mom. I was so nervous meeting her i want to impress her. The funny thing is my mom and your mom have the same name.

I met your mom at the church.

We were talking at the church cause i was asking question about what are they doing. we have different religions at that time.

We were caught in the moment staring at each other.

When we looked back, i was shocked cause i saw your mom. it made me laugh and shy at the same time we were joking around because your mom saw us joking around.

We talked she told me you had crushes but i was the first one she met, I was speechless. I was just smiling.

Many people taught we were a couple because they see our chemistry but they usually say our sweetness make them feel giddy.

I also know that your cousin doesnt like me at all. i dont know why.

I heard what she was saying when we were talking on the phone.

You made a decision to stop courting me, Well my mom did warn me and also i was feeling something was off with you.

Like there's something wrong with how you talk to me the past few days.

It hurt pretty badly because i was not expecting it especially from you.

You were the first guy that i let to meet my parents, my sisters,and my friends. although i had met your mother.

The first couple of days , of what seems to be a break up but not really because there was never an us.

I got sick three days i guess my heart was overwhelmed with sadness.

Days turns to weeks then to months, i got used not talking to you and thinking about you.

I grew tired of thinking of answers that cannot be answered but

I miss the days i would talk to you and possibly rant things to you.

We use to talk about random things.

I miss the days i fall asleep while you were reviewing.

Just hearing your voice calms me and i can sleep peacefully.

I'm sorry i wasnt good enough for you.

Its been months already. I re-read our convos and damn i was shocked because wow thats how sweet i was. the last time we saw each other was when we had a date in star city.

My mom was reluctant me to go but i said i want to really see you.

It was one of your promises to date me in snow world. it was my first time being inside that place.

Winter wonderland as they say "it was beautiful and it was so cold". I was so happy to come with you.

Its still vivid in my memories we shared together.

"My winter wonderland"

I graduated before you i was thinking its of the possibilities you dont want to be with be and also i was a roman catholic then

You told you need to prioritize things in your life especially your studies i understand you because you want finish your studies but why cant you can do both?

You had a doubt i presume with me. now i realize i dont really know if you really did love or you were just confused.

When we were at the church you always put distance between us. its feels like you dont want me to be seen with you.

I did ignore it and still cant get a answer from you But one day i got a answer, you dont to show off i mean your sweet side.

You seem happy and i do hope , i hope you fullfil your dreams and Have a strong connection with God.

Its been months,I'm much happier now. i can smile now but i try not to cry when telling stories what happened between us.

A new chapter ahead awaits me....

Life is hard but God is with us.

We are saved by the graces of God.

Have goals in life.

I understand people sometimes underestimate me but i have more to give.

I'm praying that i can provide for my family as the same time.

Believe and not forget God will not let me be alone.

God will provide.