Umm hi I guess? Oh who am I kidding no one is gonna read this I'm writing this because I thought it would be a good  idea to let my feelings out on a place that I hope people won't judge me... I guess I should introduce myself

Hi I'm Amelia I'm a 12 year old bisexual girl that is moving to a new home soon well I hope my parents said that we might go homeless... I don't want that to happen no one dose my parents are stressed mostly my mom she is going to have a baby soon... and corona is not helping at all I'm the oldest out of 2 siblings soon to be 3 I don't like to complain but... I kinda wanna open up to my feelings heh well this is what it's for right?  My family is kind well my grandparents and aunts are.... my dad and mom is sorta a meh they fight a lot but that's normal nothing is perfect.. but it's more like one moment everything is fine but then something happens and then one of them lash out... when I'm with my friends I feel safe and happy but... I hide my true feelings I may seem happy and brave outgoing on the outside but on the inside... is a scared little girl who wishes they didn't have to move a girl who wants their parents to stop fighting all the time a girl who wishes that she wouldn't tense up every time her father walks by waiting to take a hit a girl who wants to go to M.I.T but keeps getting bad grades in math and Science and know no matter what she will do she will always fail a girl that is scared of what people think of her a girl who gets yelled at when she makes mistakes... this might be stupid it sounds like I'm complaining and shit but I just I just don't know anymore im just a kid anyway but I don't like to admit it but I'm scared I'm scared that I might not be able to hold on anymore I'm scared that things won't get any better only worse I'm scared that people will disown me... I want help but I just don't know how to ask for it there is so much going on inside of my head I just don't know how to tell anyone people keep asking if I'm ok I wanna tell the truth but I lie saying "yes I'm ok" or nod sometimes I just wanna curl up in a ball with my stuffed animal and cry I wanna go back and time and fix all my mistakes and hope it makes things better I.... I wanna reset

Amelia.c -
Wednesday September 2 2020