A/n,

Don't believe in ghosts? Ha, well with paranormal activity with the Sakamaki dads, anything is paranormal; quite literally you're all vampires. Also, Ayato's and Laito's are the best this go around!

~Coffee

P.S

Anyone want a Mukami edition of Daddy Scenarios? Let me know in the comments!!!!

^ that face is scary enough to put ANY child to bed

Shu

It was a crisp autumn day, the smell of cinnamon was in the air. Technically it was summer but I just love using that to open spooky scenarios.

Ahem,

It was a dark and stormy night, lightning was booming and thunder was crashing. Shu of course slept through it as always, but something to you, as you sat in your living room playing Amnesia on your PSVita, felt severely off-key. Although you couldn't put your shaking finger on the problem, you were still hesitant to believe something was off.

"What the heck was that!?!?" Jumping off the couch and looking into the dimly lit kitchen was a shattered bowl on the counter. A bolt of lightning struck as you stared at it. "Uhhhhhhh, hello?" You muttered, voice shaky. No reply, and quickly you brushed it off. So you returned to shipping Heroine with Ikki until BOOM!

Hastily you jerked your head backwards. The cabinet drawer was open with the silverware on the floor. Paranoid, you decided to tell yourself "Ghosts aren't real haha! Nope nothing! None of them exist!" That was until out of nowhere, the ceiling began cracking and the chandelier started swirling in repeating circles.

"DADDY!!!" You screamed as Shu appeared holding a machete. "Get behind Daddy, honey." He said with a determined look. Frightened, but relieved Shu was with you, he threw it across the room. He looked around attempting to protect you. "Alright Y/n...it's just a game...Games can't hurt us!" Shu laughed in a reassuring way until the vase swung across the room and you both darted out the door.

"OKAY WE'RE DEAD."

Reiji

"Y/n, there are no such things as ghosts." Reiji said as he tucked you in that night. You protested however, stating that you did play with a ouija board that day, and you were convinced there was life on the other side. "But father!" You whined until he pulled the covers over your face. "Goodnight Y/n." Repeated Reiji before leaving and turning off the life. Okay, so you may have looked up demons that you could summon with the board, and you may or may not have succeeded in summoning one.

So as you lied in your bed, scared out of your mind of the unknown, you burrowed further into them. The curtains swayed through the dark as your eyes lay upon the court of potions resting on the shelf. Was the demon ZoZo real? Or was he some nonsense crafted by mortals. Whatever it was, your thoughts were erased as the potions flopped off the shelf and onto the floor.

"AH! What was that!?!" Quickly you switched the light on, and on the floor rested the dozens of bottles, shattered and destroyed. "Hehe, well. Is there anyone there? T-tap once for yes, and twice for no." Then all of a sudden, just like classic Vampire horror films, a harpsichord began playing. But to your knowledge, your family hadn't any harpsichord.

Then came one knock.

You jumped. It was more of a bang, but it still scared you. "F-Father is that you?" The words escaped your fearful lips. You knew something from the unknown had made its way into your house when Reiji opened the door and stuttered at the sight of lipstick writing itself on the mirror. He groaned reaching for the light switch, and when he turned it on, it fell to the ground.

Reiji huffed. "Y/n, did you by any chance summon another demon Yui must call her father to come and perform an exorcism?"

Ayato

The never ending rain was still on the forecast, and Ayato had your grandfather Karlheinz over because his house ran on solar panels, therefore due to rain and storm, he was crashing between your beds. This wasn't a joke either. He literally slept between you and Ayato's mattresses like a sandwich. Throughout the week you both endured Russian paid brides, microwaving TV dinners, electric toothbrushes, and wholeheartedly just hell. The both of you even attempted to stage a fake fight to get him to rage quit and go, but he said something along the lines of "You mean the world to him! And YOU mean the world to her! And I mean the world to both of you! We're like brothers! O-or fathers! Na, brothers sounds cooler."

"Alright Y/n, I don't want to be a buzzkill like your uncle Reiji, but it's time to get that skrub out of Yours Truly's house. ASAP." You tapped your fingers lost in thought, storming for much needed ideas. "I got it!"

"Grandpa wake up! There's a ghost!" You said shining the flashlight between the two mattresses at 2 AM, where Karlheinz was covering his eyes from the bright shining light. "A ghost??" He retorted utterly perplexed. "Yes, and he's a very angry ghost!" A pause of silence occurred before you fake coughed. "I SAID, he's a very ANGRY ghost!!" Suddenly ghost noises started coming from the hallway. Karlheinz winced his eyes looking into the black space. "Oo, he does sound angry!" Suddenly he grabbed your hand and ran out into the hallway, where Ayato was underneath a white sheet making strange infant like noises. "Ooooooo!!" 

Karlheinz snatched the sheet off of him and took his hand. "Now's not the time to be playing in the sheets Ayato! There's a ghost in our house!" The crazed old man ran downstairs and opened the front door. "Here, you'll be safe out here in the cold and pouring rain!" He slammed the door and locked it as Ayato and you looked inside terrified. "P-Pancake!" Ayato nearly screamed in utter shock as Karlheinz pulled a baseball bat out and began walking around in his underwear.

"Alright ghost, it's just you and me now ghost!" A lamp fell over across the room, as Karlheinz's fat and lazy butt bumped into it. "IS THAT YOU?!?!" In a daze, he screamed and jerked around swinging the bat and destroying Ayato's flat screen TV. "NOOOOOOO!!!!" Ayato fell to his knees sobbing as one of his most prized possessions aside from Yui and Takoyaki was destroyed. His only source of football was gone.

By the time Karl had opened the door, everything was destroyed, and an empty jar of bedbugs rested firmly in his hands. "Took me all night, but here is your ghost!" He exclaimed holding it out. "You idiot! There was no ghost!! We just told you that so you would leave!" The words escaped Ayato's mouth like crisp darts to a board. Karlheinz stood there in shock as he snatched the jar from his hands. "Brother, is it true what the other brother just said?" He turned hopelessly to you, and you nodded. "It's true, you can't stay here anymore." Karl sighed, realizing he'd have to return to hell (quite literally). "Alright, I don't need to be told twice." He sighed looking down. "Apparently you need to be told a thousand times!" Ayato retorted disgusted.

"I'm a bad house guest, always have been. You tell me a secret I post it online. You tell me explicitly not to look in your third desk drawer, and I have your third desk drawer right here." He pulled out your drawer filled with embarrassing stuff and took it with a blank expression. He sighed walking out into the cold and pouring rain, looking down. "I'll go back to my cold and dark house, because I ain't got no family!!"

"QUICK Y/N! GET INTO THE HOUSE BEFORE HE COMES BACK!"

Kanato

It was a dark and stormy night. Thunder was crashing, babies were screaming, and Kanato was stabbing. Amongst the chaos that had ensued, you were in your bedroom watching Shelter, bawling your eyes out and ignoring the screaming noises. "Mei I swear this might be the deepest music video ever created!"

Then, as you were sitting on your bed, you heard something shuffle in the closet. Head tilted you turned that way. The door was still bolted closed, as growing up you had a fear of monsters (despite Kanato himself being a monster) and hated sleeping with the door wide open. So, lying in your bed, snuggling into your covers, you suddenly felt the bed jump up into the air. "NGH WHAT WAS THAT!!!! DADDY!!! THERES A MONSTER UNDER MY BED!!!!" Your screaming actually overpowered the crashing thunder and the infants' cries; it even shattered Yui's mirror.

With those words, the window exploded and glass flew everywhere; Kanato swung in via vine and landed Indiana Jones style on the floor. You jumped into his arms, burying your soft face into his purple hair, and he looked around. "Princess, there's no such thing as monsters." He reassured as you began protesting.

Suddenly, the mood shifted and the door opened instantly. The sight? A black shadow. It appeared large and heavy. "Hey guys, what's for dinner?" Laito said popping in. "Okay Y/n, we're moving." Kanato replied.

Laito

For the past few days, you creepy cousins and uncle Kanato visited. Everything was fine up until a few minutes later. Ren had fallen asleep in his bed upstairs, and Yui was going to the store to purchase diapers. Due to this, you and Laito had been instructed to be attentive towards Ren and his night terrors. So the both of you turned off the Wii and walked upstairs to his bedroom.

"Hey dad, I have a weird feeling in my stomach." You said sighing. As the both of you stepped into Ren's bedroom, Laito looked at his sleeping baby and made a relieved face. "When it comes to parenting you gotta be firm and just." He said turning around to you. In shock however, as he spoke, Ren began floating above his bed, as if he was sprawled out. Quickly you pointed it out. "Uh dad..?" Laito swung around and looked at him as if he was intrigued and dumbfounded. "Well you never have this problem with sock puppets.." Mumbled he, pulling him back into bed.

You tilted your head again as Ren began doing flips. "Dad what's wrong with him!!!" You stuttered. Laito grasped his shoulders as he looked straight into Ren's eyes. "When you wish upon a star, you gets lots of stuff!" Shouted Ren.

"Okay Ren, I'm looking for a nice and quiet evening where you go to sleep and I raid the icebox!" Laito replied. Ren twisted his head 360 degrees making you gasp and fall back into the dresser. "What! Ren! What's wrong with you?!" You screamed. Laito rolled his eyes as if it was anything but abnormal for his kid to be doing such things, and grabbed his head. "Well here's the problem! His head's not screwed on right!"

Ren replied and started kicking Laito's face. "AH! DAD!" You screamed and jerked him away, and grabbed Ren. "Okay Ren! What's wrong with you! Why are you doing this!?" Your voice screamed. "Voices."

"Voices?" You replied. "In here." Ren pointed to his noggin and twisted his finger in his temple. "Telling me what to do!" You raised your eyebrow as Laito tilted his head. "You have voices...Inside of your head?" Hastily you retorted. Ren brought his knees to his chest and looked up at you. "Sometimes." Intrigued yet disturbed, you pulled away and looked at him. "And, uh, what kind of things do they tell you to do?"

Suddenly Ren started puking all over you, making your reaction be one of disgust as Laito jumped away like "YOU ARE NOT GETTING THAT ON MY HAT!" The amount of throw up was out of the ordinary, as if a waterfall had exploded out of his mouth. From that however, Ren jumped up as if nothing happened and started chicken dancing around the room.

"Oi! What has gotten into this kid!?" Laito yelled trying to catch him. "COME HERE YOU LITTLE BRAT!!!" Laito attempted to catch him as you pulled out a book. "Uh maybe you can tell him a lullaby!?" You pointed to a book as the child continued to run around the room. Laito still tried catching him as he replied "DO I LOOK LIKE THE KIND OF GUY THAT KNOWS A LULLABY!?" He yelled in the chaos.

"SING!!!!" Screamed Ren as Laito picked him up and started rocking him. "Lullaby and goodnight. Close your big creepy eyes. If you sleep, you will keep, and I will get out of here alive..." Laito sang and Ren fell asleep. You sighed and smiled. "Awe, he's kind of cute when he's sleeping.." Then as Laito spoke, attentive to you alone, Ren vanished from his arms. "AGH! WHERE'D HE GO!!!??!" Frantically the two of you looked around. "HE TELEPORTED!!" You screamed, unsure of where your baby brother went.

"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." The words came from the roof, and as the both of you turned your heads to the ceiling, Ren was there. He was crawling with his hand twisted to face you two. "Huh, well that's not something you see everyday." Suddenly Ren jumped on Laito and started crawling around on him. "AGH!!!! GET HIM OFF!!" He kept swarming around until

BOOM!

Ren kicked Laito right between his legs. "Ow-" He mumbled tearing up. Awestricken, you covered your mouth. "D-dad?" You said in sympathy.

"OKAY BRAT I'M GONNA GET YOU!!!" He screamed until Ren yelled "I REGRET NOTHING!!!!" And jumped out the window.

Subaru

All your life Subaru had raised you in believing ghosts weren't real bla bla bla. However, you were about to form your own conclusion regarding the paranormal. As the sun was setting and the little devil worshippers as Yui called them went out hunting for their next sacrifice, you were in the kitchen filming yourself dancing to Kindan No 666 to send to your friends on Snapchat. Yes your uncles had made this song. Yes you didn't care.

As you danced, you huffed. Until all of a sudden you heard a thud. "What the heck?" Mumbled you. "That was weird. Eh maybe Papa got triggered and is breaking stuff in his room." However, as you went back to doing whatever it was you were doing, behind you all of a sudden the stairs began stacking up. Naturally you didn't notice until one of the legs broke and the entire chair toppled off the others and landed on you.

"CRAP!!"

The world was blurry as you lied underneath the hardened wood. Unsure of what to do, unclear of the future, you moved your attention towards the knife block in the corner. I mean sure the knives were there and all but it's not like they could do anything. At least that was what you thought, until all of a sudden they shot straight up, floating in the air and pointing at you.

Terrified you screamed, jumping from under the chairs. "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!!!" Hastily you ran out of the room and the levitating knives chased after you. "NGH PAPA!!!!! AAAH!!!!!" Scared out of your mind, you dashed upstairs and into Yui and Subaru's bedroom where they slept peacefully. In between the two lovebirds you dived and buried your face into Subaru's side.

"Y/n what the hell are you doing?" Subaru muttered half awake. "Papa there's a ghost."