Mariana

We watched the hotel security cameras on the massive screen that was divided into 9 parts, showing 9 different areas of the hotel. He didn't usually bother me with how he did his work but this was important to him, emotionally. He needed me even if he didn't voice it.

As a woman, we are in more control of our emotions in a healthy manner where as men, don't really know what to do when they feel certain things. Sometimes those emotions come out violently towards other, sometimes they can self-destruct, sometimes it can even be promiscuous. That's what Santiago did before.

Now, he actually talks.

He told me about his fears of finding her and her not accepting him. He was afraid that she'd been abused by people. He couldn't handle that bit. He couldn't accept that his little sister was alive and in pain and he didn't know. Remembering his eyes water in the dim yellow light of the city made my chest ache all over again. He wasn't an emotional person and seeing him that manner, knocked the breath out of me.

I rapped my hands around his bicep, leaning into him. To people, the gesture looked as if I were holding onto him for support where in reality, I was trying to calm him down by rubbing my palm down his arm. There was sizzling energy that was vibrating through his body, ready to burst.

Javier pressed a button on the remote and it pulled up the feed from the main lobby and the other little boxes of video scattered across the edge of the big middle screen. Santiago stepped forward, right in front of the T.V. over the fireplace that was in this penthouse suit. He owned this hotel.

"Zoom in on the girl." He pointed. The camera panned, zoning in on the petite girl who stood behind a man who looked as menacing as Javier but slightly slimmer. He didn't look like a body builder but his make wasn't like Santiago's or Xavier's. They looked expensive. Santiago's body was pure muscle from work out not manual labour. Unlike the guy who was protecting Santiago's possible little sister.

The girl on the other hand looked strong but small. I was 5'8 and she probably only came up to my shoulders. The camera zoomed in again. She looked up and a jolt surged up from my stomach to my throat.

Her upturned big brown eyes sucked the energy out of my body, forcing me to grab on to the back rest of the sofa behind me for support. It couldn't be. I was mortified.

My eyes went to Santiago's back.

He'd paused the image on her pretty little face.

It was suddenly so cold in the room. I couldn't stop the little shiver that racked up my body. My gaze returned to the screen. I'd seen those big eyes that were too big for her face. That was the image that greeted me every time I went to our living. I'd seen those eyes on the 5 year old girl who was sitting on Tiago's arm wearing a tiara.

The only difference I saw between the girl on the screen, in front of me and the girl who's image was a shrine at our house, was age. Other than that, their eyes, pouted lips that resembled Tiago as well were exactly the same.

Both of their hair was ink black and even though Tiago's eyes were that big but the colour and up turned look was exactly the same.

"Fuck." He cursed. Everyone in the room could feel his agony. "Don't let them leave." He barked at Javier. Everyone quickly erupted into action. People were talking on the coms, radios and Javier was furious tapping the screen on his tablet.

"Tiago." I tried to catch up with him when he rushed out of the main door to get to the Elevator. "You need to calm down." I chased after him but it was difficult in a fucking dress and high heels.

"I need to get to her." He pressed the button for the elevator that said 4 and we were all the way up on 28th floor. "Fuck it." He burst through the side rood that lead to the stairwell.

"Tiago." I tried to call after him but he looked like he was fucking flying down the stairs. Giving up, I walked back down to the little entrance hall of the Penthouse suit to find Javier using a master key to get the Elevator up here quickly.

"He's going to scare her away if she doesn't recognise him." My heart was pounding against my chest. Putting one hand on my hip and the other on my throat, I tried not to throw up.

"It's really her isn't it?" His question was more like a statement.

"Yeah. We need to get down there." I was panicking.

"Don't worry, the jog down will give him a good exercise, it will calm him down." That really wasn't a bad idea. The bubbling energy was coming out in a different way. It didn't take us long to get down to the lobby. We realised that we arrived earlier than an him so we waited, my heart in my mouth.

"Oh shit. They suspect something and are trying to leave." The minute Javier finished watching the screen of his tablet, Santiago burst through the door, zoomed past us to the main lobby.

"Lucia." He bellowed.

Santiago

It was her. I knew it was her the minute she came on the screen. I was high on adrenaline and the run down the stairs didn't take anything out of me. I had to see her even if she hated me, I needed her to tell me she was Lucia.

The girl stopped dead in her tracks.

My heart grew tentacles, wrapped them around my throat. I needed to hurl. Xavier was facing me. His eyes became like saucers, complexion paled when he realised that it was me. "Holy shit." He cursed. "He's alive!"

I walked down towards her. Static noise roared in my ear. The edge of my vision started to blur. Feeling light headed, my stepped faltered slightly but I carried on. I had to get to her.

Finally, after what felt like hours, she turned. Her mother's cheek bones were high up on her face, those signature Catalan eyes were staring right up at me. I remember those big eyes on a little baby face that was too small for those orbs. Her eyes widened in recognition

"Ah!" A very soft whimper left my lips. Her acknowledgement was like cold water being poured onto the fire that had been raging inside of.

I ached.

It hurt to look at her.

Slowly, I was gaining back control of my body.

"Lucia, please?" I was able to speak finally. "I just need to see you're alive." I sounded like someone was stabbing me.

"I'm right here." The big guy next to him whispered to her. He her hand in his and slowly her out in front of him.

"Eres realmente tu?" (Is it really you?) I didn't speak in Spanish often. Unless it was in the bedroom with my wife, I didn't speak in Spanish. Even my Tio who was in Mexico. My heart clenched. I had to call him, get him out here.

"You grew up." I sounded close to tears. I didn't give a fuck what my men thought of me at this moment.

"You look old." She finally spoke. Her husky hollowed voice was still the same but slightly deeper. She had a unique voice that sounded similar to someone who lost their voice. Our cousins use to tease her for it. I remember telling them off when one of them made her cry. I hated to see her cry.

Waves of emotions were bubbling up in my chest, threatening to break through the damn. Her pouty lips quivered, water danced on her lower lid. Shit.

She burst into tears. I didn't know where she'd been, I didn't know what she had to do to survive. All I knew that my baby sister, who I loved so fiercely so boldly, was standing right in front of me. Mariana was right, she was coming home.

I grabbed her by the shoulders, hugged her tightly. She was my sister. I could recognise her anywhere.

She is real. This is not a dream. This is real.

My thought were in a loop. It was as if I was in a time warp. God had given me another chance to make it right. My body shook from the severity of the situation. She was crying hard against my chest and I hugged her close, almost lifting her of the floor. The last time I held her like this was on her 9th birthday.

A sob broke through my chest thinking about it.

I knelt down, hugged her before I left with her dad. She was upset that I wasn't going to be there. She never made demands with her dad. She understood he had important work but me, I was fair game. She begged me to stay, pouted pushing out her full lips. It broke my heart to leave her but I was going to be back within hours. I promised her that. I promised her that I'll give her the birthday present when I got back.

That never happened. Another sob raked my body and I tried my best to comfort her.

It took her a while to calm down and I appreciated every second that she was hugging me. Just like when she was little. Now, she was a grown woman and that was a hard thing to digest. I'd missed so much of her life and that bit hurt.

Her sobs lessened and I wiped my face with my hand, when I lifted my head of her shoulder. Wiping the wet hand on my trouser, I heard Mariana sniff behind me. I wanted to go to her but I needed to make sure Lucia wasn't going anywere.

"Where have you been? How are you alive? Were you with De La Cruz all this time?" I sounded frantic. A sad smile crept up on her lips. Years of sadness had accumulated in her eyes. I ran my hands up and down her arms. "Are you okay? How did you end up here?"

She was just about to say something when Xavier spoke up.

"Lets go somewhere private. People are staring." Xaiver walked forward looking like he'd just seen a ghost. I guess he had. We're both supposed to be dead.

I properly looked at the man he'd become. Successful and sophisticated. Just like Luca would have been. My eyes burned again. "Xavi." Xavier deflated, a charming smile stretched across his face. "You've grown up."

"I can say the same for you." Xavi chuckled.

"Let's move."

It appeared that Lucia was having a panic attack and the guy who I assumed was her boyfriend, went after her. I was afraid that she will be disappointed in me for not finding her. If I'd known, I would have moved mountains to bring her home, keep her safe. My legs felt weak. Moving over to the sofa, I plopped down with my head in my hands.

"Okay, all of you. Go. Javi, could you please take Xavier to the guest apartment. Then, you know what to do." People started moving around. It took a while but then I heard the elevator ding. Silence hit me. I collapsed on the sofa. I didn't know what to do. My mind was racing 100 miles an hour, just like my heart.

"Tiago." Mariana's beautiful face hovered over me. Her eyes were red, makeup slightly ruined around her eyes. I sat up pulled her down in front of me. Giving me a sad smile, she kissed me.

She doused the fire that threated to ruin me. I breathed in her scent. She centred me. Her soft lips caressed over mine, making love them. Her tongue dance along with mine, I loved the taste of her. My hands were in her beautiful long hair, her nails grazed my scalp. I didn't think about anything but her. Mariana, my wife.

Who's the rock of my life.

She taught me live again, taught me to live even with the guilt of not being able to save my family. Sometimes, when she went away for her job, it was hard for me to breathe. I was counting the days where I could finally end Jude and join her in her journey. She was achieving so much and I was immensely proud of her.

When she pulled away, her hand landed on my heart. It was our little thing, to find out what the other was thinking.

"She's here, alive. What matters the most now, for you to learn what happed. You can't lose your cool. Your sister needs you." My heart picked up. Speaking of my dead sister in present tense was death defying. Literally. "Hey, calm down." She felt it, when my heart picked up. "Enjoy the fact that she's alive. Everything else doesn't matter. I'd do anything for my little brother to be here and I know what I feel for him might not be the same as you do. She's like your child and I can't imagine losing that." My nostrils flared at the comparison. My Tio had said that to me before. I treated her like my own.

Maybe that's why I never wanted kids of my own.

"Oh gosh, her father will go crazy." I was finally calm, able to form words and hold a normal conversation.

She was just about to reply when I heard footsteps come towards us. We both stood, her boyfriend, who killed Mason Capone, was right behind her when they came out through the corridor.

"I still can't believe it's you." She came to me. Mariana quickly moved out of the way.

"Why don't I show you to the guest apartment. Xavier is there right now." My wife was trying give me and my sister some time to talk alone. I didn't think either one of us was ready for that. The guy followed her but not before dropping a kiss on Lucia's forehead.

"I'm Gabe, nice to meet you." He shook Mariana's hand.

"Mariana. Santiago's wife."

My sister looked at me, a cheeky smile played on her lips. "You got married. You have to show me pictures." She tried to lighten the mood. We both sat down, facing each other.

"How are you still alive? When we got the reports, it said everyone was dead." I cupped her shoulder.

"When they came to the house, spraying bullets, I hid." There was evident disgust on her face. "Jude, found me. He talked about how my father wasn't there so he took me, use me as a leverage." She sounded cold. Almost like Mariana when she spoke, like actions behind those words held no meaning to it.

"If I'd known, I would have come for you." My voice wavered, unlike hers.

"I know. I know that. If I'd know you or my father was alive, I would have tried to find you." I wanted to correct her. Papa not father. She'd never called him that. It was always papa, with head tilt that always got an yes. Now, she seemed cold. "What?"

"The last time I saw you, you were wearing a tiara and now, you're talking about being kidnapped so calmly, I don't even know how to process this." That emotion was rising again. I wanted to go home, drink until I couldn't remember anything.

"I survived and now I'm here. I don't want to keep dwelling on the past. I want to move on." She shrugged. Suddenly, she was hugging me. Surprised, I wrapped my arms around her shoulder. "I'm so happy to see you. I'd almost forgotten what my family looked like or who I was. It'd been so long. It felt like it was better that way." Pulling back she looked at me seriously. "When Jude kidnapped me again right before Gabriel saved me, he told me dad was alive. Gabe and I have been in hiding before we met Xavier. I started remember the good days. I forgot a lot of it but I remember you. You were my favorite."

An innocent smile spread across her lips. Her eyes, lips and complexion, looked so much like mine.

"You were always my favorite too." I patted her head like a child, making her move away from my hand just like she was little. "It's hard to think of you as an adult." It felt like time had stopped for me when it came to my family.

They were all trapped in a bubble in my head where things were perfect in their own way. They were all happy and young in my head. Now that Lucia had broken that little bubble, I didn't know how to treat her.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." I sounded pathetic. I was not the dominant man that Mariana liked to get down on her knees for. Disgust churned in my stomach. I needed to fucking man up, I had responsibilities. Finding out your family that you thought were dead are now alive, was crippling. Now I needed to figure out how to live knowing that I didn't save her.

"I want to know how you got here, where you were. How you survived?" She was about to reply to me shaking her head from side to side. "But not now. Neither of us are ready for it. I want you to stay here. I own this. I need you safe." I swiped the back of my hand on her cheek.

She nodded and we sat there, talking the sun came out and she was too tired to stay up. I showed her to the room where I guess Gabe was. When we knocked we found him still up, watching something on the T.V. He came to get her and I hugged her goodbye one last time, telling her I'd be in the Master suit right by the second lounge

I found Mariana in the master suit, fast asleep. I was bone tired. From the lack of sleep in the past week, I'd run myself dry. Taking off my clothes, I joined her. She was wearing the pajamas and some of my clothes were sprawled on the chair at the end of the bed. Either she went home and brought the clothes or had Javi send someone.

When my back hit the mattress, I pulled her to me, wrapped my arm around stomach. I remember there was a time when we didn't use to cuddle and now, I could hardly sleep without her there. My heart softened. She'd also lost her family and I'm sure would have loved to have had someone come and tell her that one of her family was alive.

Death was also cruel to her.

One thing I realised today was that death is not the for the ones who are dead. The ones that are gone and can't breathe, speak and feel any more. They are gone with their memories and consciousness.

Death is for the ones who are living. Those who are left behind. The ones that still breathe, speak and feel everything. Left with the memories and continuous reminder of something being missing. Someone. For us, it was a lot of people.

Death is for the two cups of steaming coffee in the morning that becomes one. Death is for the "good morning" that becomes silence in the morning. Death is for the keys that are never going to be used again. Death is for the side of the bed that is never going to be used again.

Death is not for the ones who were buried 6 foot under. Death is for the ones who stood above and wailed.

The dead can neither hear, nor see. But the ones they leave behind feel double. The empty chairs, the empty room and the full closet that one feels too much to empty. A smile to be never seen again, a voice to be never heard. A laugh that fades with time, face that fades disappears with the wind.

The slow burn last long for the ones that are left behind.

But of the dead?

The dead is dead.

They are in peace.

Unlike the ones they leave behind.

There was an attempt on elena's life and after that everyone was saying yes to her.

Only Mariana says no.

She's grateful for that.

Leather lined swing sling

"I'm sorry I couldn't give you a family. A wedding with a church full of people."