A/N the Andy I mentioned in the last chapter was Andy Biersack btw, I forgot to mention that and people weren't sure :)

Chapter Twenty Nine

I have to admit, it was only when music came around and me, Oli and Kellin made our way into the practice room that i realised how little me and Kellin had conversed all day. To be fair, I had a lot on my mind, but I still felt bad for not noticing sooner.

He spoke a little to me here and there, but mainly it was me and Oli doing the talking. Luckily I don't think Oli noticed as he was so caught up in the song he was writing, but I certainly did. I didn't want to confront him there and then though, in case Oli got dragged into it, so I went the whole session making small talk and trying to keep the atmosphere carefree.

Kellin spoke to me now and again, but only when he needed me to pass something to him or if I asked him a direct question. By the time the end of class came, I had to practically run after him out of school campus.

"Kellin wait up!" I yelled after him as he all but power walked down the road. He ignored me, and it was only when I caught up to him fully and grabbed ahold of his elbow that he spun round to face me, a glare on his features. It shocked me to see him looking at me that way, and my gut filled with dread as to what he could possibly know.

"What do you want?" He snapped, and it took me a moment to adjust to his tone and figure out some sort of reply.

"What's the matter? I mean, what have I done?" Part of me didn't even want to ask "you haven't spoken to me all day and I don't even know why, you could at least tell me what it is so I can apologise."

"Do you really want to bring it up?' he raised an eyebrow and started to walk again, leaving me to walk beside him at a face pace.

"Well I don't see any other way that we can resolve this" I was suppose to be heading towards the church, but I figured Gerard would know to cover for me. This was the main matter at hand, and I wasn't giving up until I knew exactly how much Kellin had heard or seen to turn him against me.

"Fine, you wanna talk about it? Then let's talk about why you smashed that alarm on Saturday night."

That certainly stunned me into silence. It was all I could do to keep walking. He glared at me from out of the corner of his eyes and huffed to himself "that's what I thought. Nothing to say anymore, huh?"

"Kellin... How did you...?"

"I was looking to see where you'd got to when I spotted you smashing the goddam thing. I nearly told everyone when they were all looking for you. To be honest the only reason I didn't spill was because I thought you deserve a chance to explain yourself. And yet you didn't even contact me once over the rest of the weekend. I still have no idea where you went or why you did it. You blatantly lied to us all today and was the only one who didn't believe your bullshit!" He was yelling by that point, and I guess rightly so.

"Kellin, I know it must have looked awful, but I promise I had my reasons" we weren't too far from his house by that point, and I was worried that my allocated slot of time in between was running out quicker than I could possibly hope to explain my crisis.

"I should hope so, seeing as you completely ruined the whole gig for Vic and the guys" He stared at me expectantly "Well go on then, explain yourself. I'm not waiting around all day" we rounded the corner onto his street, and I swallowed the lump in my throat.

I was going to have to come clean to him, I couldn't see any other way out of it.

"Look, i'll tell you everything. I just... it's a long story and I don't really want to do it out here" I glanced over at his house, which was no doubt empty. From what I'd gathered his parents were away most nights on business trips and such, so Kellin tended to have the place to himself. Part of me wondered if he'd ever wanted a sibling, but he always seemed pretty happy there on his own.

"Fine, you can come in on the condition that you tell me exactly what's been going on without any bullshit, okay?" He crossed his arms over his chest and stared me down, but despite his harsh expression I knew I wearing him down, his anger slowly ebbing to a bubbling rather than an explosion.

"Okay" I sighed before following him up the driveway.

Kellin didn't offer me anything to drink like he normally would. Instead he simply lead me up to his bedroom and made me sit down on his desk chair whilst he perched on the edge of his bed, waiting for me to begin. So I did.

I told him about how Dewees had been at the park, how he was on drugs and how his dealer had seen me holding his drug drop. I told him how Dewees had told me not to tell a soul, especially not my friends, and to stay as far away from Ian as possible. Then I told him how Ian had been there that night, how i'd smashed the alarm in sheer panic and then run as far as I could away from the place before I or even he got hurt. He listened to the whole thing with wide eyes. At first he seemed in disbelief, but by the time I had finished he seemed convinced with my story.

"Fucking hell Frank" He groaned "You really don't have much luck, do you?"

"Nope" I sighed "I didn't want to tell you in case it put you at risk. I certainly never wanted to ruin Pierce The Veil's gig. Vic dosen't know, does he?" Kellin quickly shook his head.

"No. As I said, I didn't want to blab until I'd given you a chance to explain yourself. And you have, for the most part" Although he didn't seem mad anymore, I could tell I wasn't done explaining.

"What else is there?"

"You never told me where you went afterwards. It obviously wasn't a one night stand so don't give me that crap either. Who took you in so late? You've never mentioned anyone else before and they must have been pretty special if you didn't rush home the next day."

"I've been seeing someone" I chose my words carefully "I can't really tell you who just yet, as he's only just coming to terms with being gay and I don't think he'd want anyone else to know just yet, but it's been going on for a while now."

"Seriously?" I nodded.

"I'd appreciate you not saying anything though. I don't want people to bombard me with questions about him just yet" Mainly because I didn't want to give away that I was fucking the local priest. I knew my friends were open-minded, but I felt they would have quite a few questions on the whole subject. Plus I couldn't have it getting back to Ray.

"It's okay, I won't mention it" He nodded "Is it, serious with this guy then?"

"I think so" If he was risking his reputation for me then it had to mean something, right?

"Do you love him?" Was his next question, and it got me thinking for a moment. We'd never exchanged those three words between the two of us, but my feelings for Gerard definitely grew stronger with each day I saw him. It was hard to tell as i'd never been in love before, but something deep down definitely stirred at Kellin's question.

"I... I don't know... maybe?' I stuttered "We haven't talked about it. I think I might."

"It kind of just hit me like a brick wall with Vic" He admitted "I was just staring at him, and I had this moment of like, an out of fucking body experience where I just knew..." He trailed off, deep in though "you'll know what I mean when you realise properly."

"Hopefully" I nodded "So, are we okay now? I really am sorry for ruining Saturday for you guys. I feel awful about it all. And I definitely shouldn't have run to my boyfriend's without calling you all. I was just really shaken up about the whole thing."

"Frank, it's okay" He smiled "I was hoping you'd have some sort of explanation. And I'm sorry I didn't give you a chance before I blanked you out. I should've know there would be more to it than that" He stood up and hugged me "In future don't keep that shit to yourself though."

"I know" I smiled. Now that I had Kellin back on my side it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. It was a shame I couldn't say the same for Ray, but hopefully i'd be able to talk him around soon enough.

By the time I got to the church it was almost time for me to go home. It had been a long day and the only reason I had even bothered to come was to see Gerard. I'd stayed at Kellin's for a while, raiding his kitchen and such before realising I should probably at least attempt to swing by.

Gerard was in the office, and luckily for me Brian didn't seem to be around.

"Hey" I grinned as I walked into the office, making Gerard jump a little and set down the book he'd been reading.

"You're late" He raised one eyebrow "you got better things to do or something?"

"I had to tell Kellin the truth about Saturday night, it took a while to cover it all" his eyes grew wide before I quickly added "Don't worry though, he dosen't know who you are. I mean, he knows i'm seeing someone, but he has no idea who."

"Okay" he exhaled "just keep it that way for now though. What made you tell him anyway?"

"He saw me smash the fire alarm so if I hadn't told him the truth I could kiss my friends goodbye" I shrugged it off "but it's okay, I trust him. We don't need to worry about any of that" I moved round to his side of the desk and leaned on the wooden furniture, effectively sitting right in front of him. "Sorry to keep you waiting" my tone got more flirtatious, and he was quick to catch on.

"We can't" he placed a hand on my knee all the same "Brian's out in the church garden helping out the gardener. He could come back at any minute."

"So we'll be careful" I placed my hand over his and squeeze it "come on Gee, it's only Monday. I can't wait all week."

"I don't want a repeat of what happened last time" he warned "we can't let him find out until you've turned eighteen. At least then the chaos will be legal."

"We just won't get naked then" I chuckled, leaning forward "that dosen't mean we still can't have fun."

He kissed me then, moving his hand up my thigh and bringing his other hand up so that he was gripping my hips before pulling me down onto his lap. The kiss seemed to be instantly open-mouthed, his tongue moving against mine in a rhythm we were slowly perfecting. I tugged at his hair, making him moan into my mouth. I could feel my jeans growing tighter, and a desperate urge of my teenage hormones made me grind down into his lap. I could definitely feel him getting hard underneath me now, so I continued to grind and rub myself against him until he started to gasp.

He pulled away from our kiss long enough to mumble a string of curse words before starting it up again, this time with his hand rubbing against my own crotch, palming me through my jeans until my breath became laboured.

"Fuck Gerard, if you don't stop i'm going to come" I moaned, knowing full well that if I came right then I was going to have a wet patch on my jeans, right where I it was most obvious. But part of me didn't want him to stop, not when I was that close.

He ignored my comment, instead slipping his hand into my jeans and grabbing hold of my dick, jacking me off in a fast pace that he knew I wouldn't be able to last under. Sure enough, I tipped my head back and made an inhumane sound as I came into his hand, sweat beads appearing across my forehead as I panted.

"technically, we didn't get naked" He chuckled, watching me fall into his chest, still coming down from my high "although you're going to need to use the hand dryers in the bathroom if you're walking home in those jeans" I looked down, seeing the wet patch my spunk had created.

"Fuck you, these are my favourite pair" I teased.

"They're my favourite too" he grinned, hand resting on my thigh "your ass looks great in them" I laughed at that, messily kissing him again before I wandered off to the bathroom where I held my jeans and boxers under the hand dryer for a good ten minutes, until all traces of what had just gone down had vanished.

I couldn't help but think about Kellin's question from earlier as I held them, thinking about the man in the room next door, who was now reading his book again as if we were the picture of innocence. Did I love him? Part of me was definitely starting to say yes, whilst the other half of my mind was terrified of what that would mean for us both.

I definitely needed to think it over before I said anything to him, that was for sure.

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~ Headfirst for Helena