"We can watch on the laptop, or we could turn the tv on and watch, it's a smart tv, so it has all kinds of apps already installed. I don't really watch tv much, but I figured I should have one, ya know. Just in case I need to watch the weather or something."

~♡~

She nodded. "The tv will be better I think."

"Okay...the tv it is." 

I picked up the remote, turning it on, flipping thru the apps finding the one I wanted. I typed BTS into the search bar, and though I didn't expect it, I got emotional when I saw all the videos pop up, my heart speeding up in my chest.

I guess I got lost for a second. I sat gazing at the tv screen, my mind going back to our time as Bangtan Sonyeondan, and I realized just how much I missed that time in my life, how much I missed all of them. 

"Tae...are you okay?"

I turned to her, smiling. "I'm fine. Just didn't realize how much I miss it."

"Are you sure you wanna watch? We don't have to if-"

"No, I do, I really do."

I scrolled thru the video's looking for 'No More Dream.' It was our very first video, and I thought it would be a good idea to start there.

"Are you okay with watching our oldest stuff first, kind of getting to know BTS from the beginning, or would you rather just watch randomly?"

She narrowed her eyes, thinking. "I think starting at the beginning is a great idea. I'm not sure at what point I had heard of you, and I can't remember any of the 2 or 3 songs that I listened to, probably because I only got to hear them once or twice each. I might remember them if I hear them again though."

"Okay, well, this was our very first song and video, our debut."

I clicked on the video, and at first, my eyes were on the tv, the memories making me smile, and feel sad at the same time. But then I glanced at Y/N, at the intrigue on her face, and I couldn't look away from her as she watched the video that began my career.

She had a smile on her face, focused on the video, and I noticed for certain parts that she smiled a bit more. When I flipped the glasses off my face was one of them, and Jimin lifting his shirt was another.

When the video finished, she looked at me, excitement shining in her eyes.

"Who's the one who lifted his shirt? I know the names were at the beginning, but I can't remember."

I chuckled. "That was Jimin."

"Well, Jimin is kinda cute, and those abs..."

I raised a brow at her. "What happened to V being cute?"

She giggled. "V's still the cutest. But Jimin might have caught my attention if I'd had a chance to get to know them back when I first heard of them."

I pursed my lips. "Hm, well, Jimin just so happens to be my best friend."

"Well, I can't wait to meet him...and the rest of them."

"Is that right?"

"Mmhm."

I knew she was teasing me, and I played along.

"Then I might have to lay down some rules before they all visit."

Her eyes widened. "What kind of rules?"

"Only one rule, actually..."

She watched me, waiting for me to speak.

"They can't be interested in you..."

She swallowed, eyes locked on mine.

"Because you're mine."

We stared into each others eyes, neither one of us saying anything until she finally looked away.

"I'm-" She locked her eyes with mine again, "I'm okay with that rule."

I nodded, giving her a smile, and clicked on 'We are Bulletproof', letting the video start. She again watched, her attention all on the tv, her eyes not looking away for even a second. 

Once it finished, she looked at me, a look of wonder on her face.

"You guys were really good."

I smiled at her. She glanced at the tv, seeing a recommended video there, and she pointed.

"What is that...Mic drop? That's ringing a bell."

"It just a dance practice video, it's not the official music video. I can play it, but I'll be skipping ahead a few years."

She nodded. "It's okay, just for this one. I think this might be one of the songs I  listened to."

I clicked on the video, and this time, I watched it. It was kinda hard not to get up and dance.

The video finished, and I looked over only to see her mouth open, then close, as she turned to look at me.

"Oh my God, I...wow. I don't even know what to say."

"Do you think that's one of the songs you might have heard?"

"I think it might be. I never saw any video's though."

I nodded. I started scrolling, looking for some more of the older stuff. I was going to play 'Boy in Luv', but she stopped me again, seeing the thumbnail for 'Singularity'.

"Is that you?"

I chuckled lightly. "Yeah, we all did a few songs on our own. I did Stigma, and Singularity, and I wrote one myself called Scenery."

"I wanna hear it, all of them, actually."

"Okay."

I clicked on the video, and watched her as she watched it. When it finished, she didn't look at me right away, taking a deep breath first. When she turned to face me, her eyes were glassy.

I raised my brows at her. "Are you okay?"

She shook her head lightly. "N-no. Your voice, I...I don't even know what I'm feeling right now."

I'd heard it before. But it felt like it had been so long ago.

"Well, I hope you liked it."

She nodded. "Very much. Can I hear the others?"

"Of course. There's no official music videos, but I can probably find a live performance of Stigma, unless you'd rather I find a lyric video."

"No, live, I'd like to see it live."

I nodded, finding it and clicking on it. She was in  a trance watching it. I saw her shake her head a few times, and her hand came up over her heart when I sang my high notes.

She sniffled, and grabbed a tissue from the box on the table next to her, dabbing at her nose.

"Y/N-"

She shook her head. "Just...play the last one, please."

I looked at her for a few seconds, and searched for the song.

"There's only lyric video's for this one."

She nodded.

I played it, and watched her, not sure if I should be concerned about the tears rolling down her cheeks. Because it was a lyric video, she was seeing what my words meant for this one.

She grabbed another tissue, wiping her face and blowing her nose.

"You wrote that one?"

"I did. I wrote it and composed it. It's the first one I've done by myself. I wrote it for Army's."

She looked at me, confused.

"Army is what we called our fans. Adorable Representative M.c for Youth.

Her  mouth opened, a small 'Ohh' leaving it, as she nodded her understanding.

"Tae, you can't just stop singing. Your voice, it's amazing."

I gazed at her, not really knowing what to say.

"I've never been so affected by someone's voice. I felt things I can't even explain. I got goosebumps. You can't let your voice go to waste. People need to hear it."

I gave her a small smile. "My singing career is over, Y/n. If people want to hear my voice, they're going to have to listen to the stuff that's already out there."

She shook her head, looking at her lap. "Buy why? Why can't you still sing?"

"All good things come to an end, right?"

Her expression changed from hopeful to sad, and a bit confused. She looked hesitant to speak.

I watched her for a few more seconds, and realized that she wasn't going to say anything after all. But the look on her face was one I had seen before. She didn't look happy, or sad, instead looking a bit shy all of the sudden.

"Y/N, what's wrong?"

She shook her head, her lips pressed together tightly. "Nothing, can we just watch more video's?"

"Sure, do you wanna pick one?" I didn't believe her. Something was bothering her. Was it because I'd said my singing career was over.

"You pick. You know the songs, after all. I'm sure I'll enjoy all of them, I have so far."

I clicked on 'Boy in Luv', and she watched that one with just as much interest as she had watched the others. I played video after video, and the smile slowly came back to her face.

At one point, we stopped to fix a late lunch, bringing sandwiches and soda's into the living room with us, and continuing to watch until it was time to get the horses in the barn for the night.

"I can help you, Y/n, my foot feels pretty good."

She shook her head. "And tomorrow it's going to feel even better, because you aren't going to try to squeeze it into your boot right now. I'm fine. I might take a few minutes longer, the stalls need to be cleaned. But I won't be long."

I huffed out a breath, aggravated at myself for being so careless and letting myself get hurt.

"I'll be back shortly. Just...sit there and read your book or something."

She left the room, and I heard her in the kitchen getting ready to go outside. Two minutes later, I heard the back door open, and then close.

I sat there, trying to figure out what she'd gotten upset about earlier. It was going to drive me nuts till I figured it out.

¤¤¤

You got to the barn, and grabbed the wheelbarrow from it's spot against the wall, grabbing a pitchfork and heading for the stalls. You cleaned fire's first, taking the dirty bedding and dumping it where you'd seen the pile outside the barn. You got snow's done quickly, and put fresh bedding down, then got the feed in their buckets and filled their water tubs half way, setting them inside each stall.

You slid the door opened, and hollered for them, hoping they didn't take too long to get here. Seconds later, You heard their hooves slicing thru the snow as they galloped towards the barn. You stood aside, smiling as they came thru the door, each going into their stalls. You slid the door closed, blocking out the chilly winter wind.

You talked to them for a few minutes, closing their stalls and looking at how beautiful they were. God you loved these animals. You never would have guessed you'd have a fondness for horses, but you could do this everyday, and never tire of it.

Except, chances were high that it wouldn't happen. After all, all good things come to an end.

You thought of Tae as you walked back to the house. He'd said you were his earlier. Your heart had almost stopped beating, and then suddenly started beating at hyper speed.

You would love to be his. But you couldn't, you knew that now. You wouldn't tie yourself to someone who couldn't promise you forever. You knew that you were young enough to not have to worry about that just yet, but after what you'd been thru, forever was all you wanted.

You were afraid to take the chance of falling in love with someone, only to find out it was one sided. You wanted commitment.

You entered the kitchen, seeing Gucci sitting there watching you, so you removed your winter attire, and went to give her food. You watched the kittens for a few minutes, trying to convince yourself that you would be okay when it was time to leave here. Taehyung could never be your forever. He was amazing, and you couldn't deny that you felt something for him. But he would never return those feelings.