Had Ryleigh been free – really free – the sheer desperation in his voice might have made her reconsider. But she had been chained long before Alder got his hands on her, and those fetters weren't as easy to break.

His heartfelt agony clenched her heart. It was hard enough to have to disappoint him, but to have a direct link to his emotions made it even more impossible. And yet it had to be done. She was certain of few things in life, but that, at least, she knew for sure.

"I have to."

She didn't look at him – didn't know how to – but if she had, she would have seen that his eyes had turned dark, his wolf sharing every bit of his anguish. Her own wolf, in turn, pushed her to stay, consequences be damned. It wasn't often that Ryleigh had to reality-check her wolf, and she wished she didn't have to. It was hard enough convincing herself.

"You don't have to," he said. "You can stay here. I know we haven't exactly seen eye to eye so far, but there's something between us – whether we like it or not. And it's more than the mate bond."

It wasn't a romantic statement, not nearly. He cared about her against his will, even against his better nature.

"I think I know what this is," Ryleigh said. "You're heartbroken over Julie and you're afraid to be alone, so you're grasping at straws. Anyone's better than no one. Only that's not true. We're not good for each other."

"You don't know that. We haven't had a chance."

"You only broke up with Julie two days ago. You're desperate."

"This isn't about Julie. I'm not trying to replace her. I couldn't. And I don't know how I feel about you – I don't – but there's no going back from rejection. Won't it be better to wait until we're sure?"

She raised her eyes to his, gold tinging the black. "I'm sure." Her heart crumbled as his hurt was channelled through their bond. She hadn't thought it possible, but she'd found something that hurt worse than silver.

"Are you, though?" he said. "When we kissed –"

"I have to go," she said, cutting him off. The last thing she needed was to have him remind her of what it felt like to kiss him. "I have made it very clear from the start that staying was never an option. If I stay here, I'll be found. And when I'm found... It's not safe to stay here. Not for me, and not for you. I'd be putting you and your entire pack in danger. Trust me when I say I'm not worth that risk."

"We can protect you." 

"I don't need protection. You do. Are you hearing me? There are people out there looking for me and they're not going to stop until they find me. It's never going to end."

"We'll figure it out."

"I have figured it out. I know what my options are, and staying here is not one of them. I can either go home or go far away."

"I refuse to believe that."

In general, Ryleigh appreciated stubbornness. She liked when people knew their minds and stuck with it. But Goddess, was he impossible.

"Look, I'm going to be straight with you. Even if things were different, I wouldn't stay either. Too much has happened. Have you forgotten that you left me for dead? You didn't want me and to be frank it's really confusing that now suddenly you do."

"I know," he said. "I can't commit to never seeing you again." Was this another one of the Goddess' jokes? Putting two of the most headstrong werewolves together? If so, she was probably having a blast.

Never was an awfully long time, Ryleigh's wolf reminded her. Could they commit to that? It would all be different once the bond was broken, she told herself. They wouldn't feel that burning need for him anymore. Leaving him would be easy.

"It's for the best," she said. "If I stayed, it wouldn't make a difference. The only thing we're destined for, is disaster. Very soon you'd realise that I'm destructive and wrong for you, and then you'd send me packing anyway. And by that time it'll be too late for me to run."

"How do you know? Look, I don't like fate any more than you do, but it's what it is. We're not going to get another chance. If you throw it away now... What if you regret it?"

She drew in a breath through her nose, slowly. It gave her a few seconds to think. Not that she could really think with Austin this close to her. Even without looking at him, she knew he was watching her. He was so close she felt his heat surrounding her, and his scent was all-encompassing. A quick glimpse confronted her with the earnestness in his gaze and she understood full well that he was making an effort to be vulnerable in front of her. None of these things, however, lessened her conviction. If anything, they made her more certain.

"I have to go," she said, lightly stressing each word, as if somehow it had been her enunciation that had caused his refusal to believe her.

"Ryleigh –"

"No. Stop." She raised both hands, in the futile hope she could physically shield herself from their emotional connection. "I don't feel the same way, alright? I've been tortured and sick and I've watched you be in love with someone else for the past three weeks and I'm tired. I haven't given myself a chance to consider you because there wasn't a point. And that's not all on you, because there was already no point before I even met you."

How he could still hold out hope even then was beyond her. The only way she could make her feelings more clear was by flat-out rejecting him on the spot, but that was too cruel a defence.

"But if you haven't given yourself the opportunity, how do you know you don't feel the same way?" he said. "Please, Ryleigh. Just give us a shot. I'm not saying we'll work out, but we only have one chance to find out. If you leave, then that's it. We'll never know."

"I already know," she said, pouring all her certainty in the phrase. "The answer is no. I'm rejecting you tomorrow and that's final."  

*****

"Austin's late," Ellis said, glancing at Austin's empty seat at the dining table. Austin knew how insistent Ellis was on punctuality, and as far as Ellis could recollect, Austin hadn't asked for leave. "I'll link him to see where he's at."

"Don't bother," Ryleigh said. "I don't think he's coming." She grabbed her cup of wine and downed half of the contents in one swig. She knew the remark would draw everyone's attention towards her, and she would rather not speak on the topic at all, but she also knew Austin needed time to lick his wounds in private.

"Why's that?" Ellis asked.

Ryleigh let her eyes wander around the hall. Dinner had already been served and chatter rose up from the many tables. She wondered how many of those wolves had fated mates, and if they ever felt like they had a choice in accepting them.

Her gaze came to rest on Julie, who was sitting on the other side of the table. Julie met her eyes, and Ryleigh found nothing in them. No rancour, no sadness, no regret. Nothing at all. It confirmed what Ryleigh had already suspected: that Julie was the type accustomed to hiding her emotions behind a façade of professionalism. She respected her for it.

At last she turned to Ellis. "Austin asked me to stay. I said no." She pierced a piece of meat with her fork but didn't raise it to her lips. She didn't need to look around to know all eyes were on her. "That's all I'm willing to say on the topic." She downed the rest of her wine and hoped that the speed with which she had drunk would help calm her.

"But..." Carry opened and closed her mouth, looking at Ellis as if to say Do something!

"Leave her be, Carry," Julie said. "This is between her and Austin."

Ryleigh couldn't tell whether Julie was pleased or disappointed that she had decided not to stay. There was no triumph in her voice, nor relief in her eyes.

"I, for one, will be glad to see you go," Conall said. "Too much drama."

"Has anyone ever told you you're an asshole?" Ryleigh said.

He smirked. "It's my best quality."

"O, hold your tongue, Conall," Ellis said. Ryleigh hadn't heard him snap before, but she didn't blame him. Ellis had worked harder than anyone else to drive Ryleigh and Austin together, and it was all for nothing. "Are you sure, Ryleigh? You can't undo rejection."

"I'm sure," Ryleigh said, and it started to feel a bit like a mantra. How often was she going to have to repeat herself before they'd believe her?

"I'll be sorry to see you go," Camden said. "I'll miss your input in my classes."

"And I'll miss going to them," Ryleigh said, realising with a pang that it was true. She moved her food around on her plate. Her eyes flitted across the tables again, and she found Ridge sitting near the back of the room. He looked up as though he felt her looking at him and waved at her. She forced her lips into a smile.

Out of nowhere, pain tore through her side and she gasped. She drew her gaze down to her ribs, fully convinced something had torn it open and blood would be drenching her shirt. Only that wasn't the case.

"Are you alright?" Julie asked.

The question went straight past her. She doubled over, crumpling against the table. Her breath caught in her throat.

"Ryleigh?" Ellis was staring at her now too, along with everyone else.

"Is it the silver again?" Carry asked.

"No." Ryleigh's eyes were wide. She had experienced many things in her twenty-five years of life, but never this. The pain she was feeling was odd – distant yet very intense. "It's not me." She struggled to her feet, her chair falling over with a clang. The entire hall fell silent. "It's him. It's Austin." The pain intensified and tears sprung to her eyes.

"What's going on?" Ellis asked, but Ryleigh was already racing down the aisle towards the exit.

"Send back-up!" she called over her shoulder. "He's dying!" 

______

A/N: I hope you're all buckled up, because it'll be a bumpy ride from here on out ;)

Thanks for reading!