Beleaguered

/bəˈlēɡər/

verb

lay siege to

Luke's POV

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My heart was beating out of my chest as I tried to fight against the masses of other men holding me back. I barely recognized some of them while others, most notably Calum, reminded me of not too long ago when I would be fighting like this against my father. However, as I looked around me, I failed to see two of the most familiar faces that had always talked sense into me in these situations.

Having noticed the absences of Ashton and Michael, I found myself fighting even harder against the grip of those surrounding me, thinking of my girlfriend and best friend's sister out of the colony while an air raid happened to be occurring. When Melissa had suggested the idea of leaving the colony for the eleven year old's birthday, never had a thought of this come to my mind.

That fact alone proved all of my fears as I shouted at myself mentally for allowing Melissa's naivety to infect my level-headed mind, but this had not been either of our faults. The anguish that was piling within my stomach as I shouted about needing to protect my small family was not caused by anything that Melissa had chosen to do.

Maybe that was what was hurting me so badly at that moment as I thought of what might of happened to Melissa. If I had not thought of this happening, then who was to say something else would happen and I would be unaware again. What if the next time something like this happened things were worse and Melissa or Riley were killed? How could I live with myself?

"Luke, you need to think rationally," Calum stated over the commotion ensuing. People looking and staring at my raging form as my eyes remained fixated on the door leading to the stairwell that would take me to Melissa and Riley. As I continued in my pursuit, Calum continually shouted random sentences of wisdom, which subsequently made no dent in my willing attempts to save my family.

Something was wrong and I knew it the moment that Melissa did not come running down those stairs with a bruised Moira trailing behind her and a crying Riley in her arms. I wanted to shout those words at Calum, knowing that the tanned boy was connected to Moira in a similar manner that I was connected to Melissa in, but as I saw the tears on his face, I knew he had already thought of that.

He knew that something was wrong with them, yet here he was, trying to make me stop pursuing my only avenue of hope. Tears streamed down my face as my body finally gave into the swelling amount of brute force acting against it. Nevertheless, when I saw Calum's eyes meet mine, the obvious stress overcoming him from the inside out.

"Why didn't you let me go?" I asked him quietly through gritted teeth, my temper not allowing me to look over at his face as I knew that I would pounce on him if I did. Even though I may not have agreed with his method, I knew in his own messed up way, this was Calum's way of protecting me.

"If you know just as well as I that there is a chance that the girls are not alright right now, why the fuck are you not letting me go?" I angrily spat, not recognizing the boy sitting beside me. Calum would have understood better than any other person the feeling overcoming me of helplessness as Janice had been within a difficult situation that was different than this in its own aspects.

The boy sitting beside me knew of the pain of knowing that something was wrong but not being able to intervene as he had no way of helping his past love through her own issues. However, now he sat before me, his head down low and hands shaking as he shook his knee, not doing anything for the girl that he could save beyond the colony walls.

"That's my fucking girlfriend and my future wife out there, possibly dying as you sit beside me with your head shaking as though you know better than I do." His weary eyes finally met my furious blue ones as I saw the red enveloping the whites of his eyes. A sad smile was the only thing dawning his face as I took another shaky breath of anger.

"Moira is my girlfriend too, and I think that it is going somewhere with her," he began, voice cracking occasionally as he appeared to be trying to compose himself from the overwhelming emotions taking over his mind and body in that moment. He looked like a wreck, more so than he ever had in all of the time he grieved for Janice; however that could've been because he knew there was nothing he could have done- she was gone.

While Janice had been dead the moment Calum had arrived, Moira was possibly struggling in that field of lilacs and daisies right now and he was here, sitting and waiting for some sort of supernatural sign. I couldn't wrap my mind around it as I was infuriated at the thought of Melissa having a scratch marring her body due to the destructive intentions of the White Coats.

"But what good am I, or you, if we are dead because we ran out before the bombing even stopped?" he asked me, heat searing through my body at the thought of dying before even reaching the love of my life. God wouldn't be so cruel as to take me before I could help Melissa, would he?

While my brain told me no, I had to trust my heart, which began sitting all the other instances that I had thought God would retain a person's life. Out of all of the times I had turned to God to save a person's life because that was what I believed was ethical, it never occurred. In Michael's, Janice's, even Cynthia's cases, I had never once been extended the mercy of their souls remaining with me.

So why did I think that God would suddenly start listening? That was a question that I asked myself repeatedly as I sat in the bomb shelter, praying with my head between my thighs in an attempt to block out the shattering of windows from above as each time they did, I would only think of the effect this was all having on a crying Riley or a stressed Melissa.

When the bombing finally ended, I was on my feet within seconds, closely followed by Calum's frame as we walked out the doors of the bomb shelter. The colony appeared to be in shambles on the top level, bombs having reached the top and blown various parts of the cement ceiling off of our bubble building.

Earthquake-like reactions ensued as I noticed many people who were unable to make it to the bomb shelter run there with their injured loved ones. Broken glass covered all of the floors as I stepped over large fallen objects. Calum was right behind me as I attempted to exit the building while avoiding the obviously strained and tired looks from parents.

Orphans who had come with a family member only to be abandoned through the horrid form of death were attempting to help each other as one carried the other. Although they all had injuries, some held more apart gashes upon their legs, one even exhibiting characteristics of a break as they screamed at every little move made.

While I felt pity swell within me, I knew that none of them would accept my help having known that I was doing it out of pity as opposed to duty. Yes, they were my responsibility as they were within the confines of the colony, but I felt that they could be taken care of by the adults and other officials currently searching for survivors as opposed to my distraught self who was only trying to get to the love of his life.

The light of the sun seemed to be mocking me as I made my way outside, moving my hand over my eyes as I tried to see beyond the settling dust of the last bomb. Within the colony, the scene had been minimized to a few broken pieces of temporarily shut off piping falling and cement blocks falling in a few places.

However, when I saw the scene of the previously wooded area that rested in the opposite direction of Michael and Janice's grave, the ounce of hope that I had that this would be a small attack diminished. The trees had fallen in response to multiple bombs having fallen around them while small fires remained alight in segregated areas, meaning that the wildlife along the other side was not in danger.

While all of these things were good, I found my heart freezing in my chest because Melissa had described the lilac field as being a mile or two out from the colony in the same direction as the path of destruction. And even though I knew that Melissa would be careful to take care of all three of the missing girls, I knew that there was nothing she could do if a bomb was dropped upon them.

"Please tell me they went toward the graves," Calum grimaced, causing me to release a deep breath as I tried to find the best way to break the news to him. But how do you tell your best friend that the only girl he had managed to open up to since his previous love was possibly lying in a burnt up field with no recognizable features on her skin?

"Let's just wait and see what we are dealing with," I said as I took off running once again. Calum's feet sounded from behind me, his pace of running being far more experienced than mine despite my obvious leadership position.

My mind was frozen in time as I saw the devastation of the bombing surrounding me, suddenly understanding very clearly that this had been in retaliation to our previous bombing of their artillery unit only a few weeks before then. Hands ran through my hair as I reached a mile marker, realizing that the field Melissa had taken Riley was most likely closer to two miles.

"Why are we stopping?" Calum asked, stopping and breathing deeply with his hands over his head as he continued pacing himself expertly. Although he appeared calm and unaffected by this, I knew that as soon as we approached the scene, he would find himself in shards upon the grass. While Calum was a soldier, he was also human and sentimental, making him a target for this type of devastation.

"I..." My train of thought stopped, not wanting to finish the sentence that I had previously been thinking as even I did not want to entertain the notion that one of the girl's, especially Melissa, was harmed in any way by this attack. "I just want to be in this moment a bit longer," I finally got out, observing the tears filling Calum's eyes as he followed my thoughts.

"You want to remember the feeling of thinking they were alive?" he asked, the tears sweeping down his dirtied face. I nodded, wiping a thin layer of soot from my face as I looked around the previously wooded area with a grimace covering my face.

Within a few minutes, Calum and I would either be ecstatic and our lives would be the same or this could be the end of our happily ever after, which neither of us wanted. Previously in my life, I had told myself that if Melissa and I could make it past an obstacle, then we could make it through anything. Never had I envisioned something as simple as a bombing ruining that thought.

I stood up suddenly, causing Cal to look at me with a surprised look as he most likely expected me to remain there for a period of time and take in the feeling; however, when I considered the option of any of the girl's needing medical support, the notion of remaining in my own happy world diminished quickly and was replaced with a harsh reality.

"Whatever happens," I began, looking him straight in the eye as I felt my emotions overwhelm me. "We take the ones alive and make sure they stay that way, understood?" I asked, tears falling down my cheeks as I realized the rule I had just stated applied to myself as well, but as Calum nodded and our feet began running again I tried to ignore the dull pain in my chest that indicated my heart was breaking at the thought.

As we began to approach the lilac field it became obvious to us that something majorly wrong had happened. The sound of sobbing mixed with an ear piercing scream took over the once silent trail. Calum and I didn't stop running until we approached the lilac field, which was still very much covered with flowers and grass.

With an exception to one area a bit further into the field, nothing seemed to be harmed during the bombing, making my heart beat a little less fast as I assumed the crying was all due to Riley's fear of loud noises; however, as Moira's frame came running toward Calum, I knew something much worse was wrong.

The well put together girl had her clothes tattered and hair misshapen upon her head. A flower crown was laced within the taggled pieces of her hair while another was on her arm, most likely having been there before the attack and her never finding the need afterward to discard of it. Nevertheless, she appeared relatively well other than the few rarities of appearing less than model appearance.

"Moira!" Calum's voice called as he took off running toward her, looking over her body furiously to detect any type of injury which did not seem to be present. Numerous questions were rambling from his lips as Moira attempted to compose herself and relay a message to us. My hand had to physically cover Calum's mouth to stop his rambling and allow Moira to speak.

"Melissa," she managed out as I heard the most distinct sound of coughing in the distance. Judging by how far away it sounded, Melissa was roughly two hundred feet from where Calum and I were currently standing, which made my instincts go into overdrive. Moira's dainty finger pointed toward the opposing hill, in the direction of where the lone bomb had settled, to indicate where Melissa was.

My heart plummeted as I realized all that it could be. Could she have inhaled too much smoke, causing her airway to be compromised? Could she have a lung embolism, ceasing all of her breathing and creating a source of blood that would be coughed up as she struggled to survive? All scenarios ran through my head as I struggled through the mass amounts of grass, weeds, and flowers to approach the only reason I went on in this life.

As I struggled through the last few steps, I saw a flower crown at my feet, most likely from Melissa, which made my heart ache even further as I saw her figure leaning toward the ground from a standing position. One of her hands was holding her hair back as a few sniffles came from her, meaning that she had most likely been emptying the contents of her stomach for whatever reason.

I found myself struggling to understand what had happened as I approached her, arms wrapping around her shoulders as I stayed out of her way for puking in case that was what she needed; however, when I looked over to find her discarded sweater acting as a clotting tool upon Riley's torso, the situation formulated in my head.

A gasp released from my mouth as I saw her ashen face and the lack of breath in her chest. Tears filled my eyes as I tried to hold myself together for Melissa's sake. Melissa already appeared to be taking the incident hard enough, meaning that she had tried to save the young girl as her final moments passed increasingly quick.

"Melissa," I tried to gain her attention as she wiped the last of her vomit from her mouth. By natural instinct, I pulled her body into mine, not even regarding the putrid smell on her as I rejoiced in the fact that she was alright. Riley's body didn't seem to penetrate my skin as I recalled the numb feeling that had taken over after Cynthia's death overcoming me.

"I tried-" she began, sobbing into my chest as I just pulled her body in closer to mine. Another gasp sounded from behind us as I assumed Calum and Moira had approached. Moira didn't say a word as though she had already seen it and gotten her hysterics out in that time rather than now when Melissa was feeling the true anguish of Riley's loss.

"I tried to save her," Melissa screamed into my chest as she found no other way to communicate her thoughts directly without sobs splitting them apart. I simply rubbed her back and whispered that I knew she tried her best into her ear as I tried to calm her, which obviously didn't work.

We all stayed there until the medics Calum had called arrived at the scene and took Riley's body away. Melissa sobbed as they placed her upon the gurney, draping a sheet over her body to conceal her identity. A lump formed in my throat as I practically carried Melissa back to the colony as she could not walk on her own due to her emotions overwhelming her.

It didn't sink in at that moment, but I know that when it did, I caught myself falling apart under the pressure of failing Ashton. Although I didn't promise the older boy much, I did promise him that I would always protect his little sister like my own, and the only thing I could say now to defend myself was that my little sister was dead too.