Alliar

I woke up with a heavy head. My eyes felt like iron doors that were never meant to be opened despite the sparrow's' song outside or the warm feel of the sun's rays on my skin. I could sleep forever if I wanted too. At this moment it was almost possible to forget the last two weeks. To pretend that I was back home in my bed seconds away from sister Claira bursting through my bedroom door to scold me for being tardy. But then that wasn't going to happen ever again and there was no point in dwelling in the past. That was no longer my life and I had to make the best out of what I had now.

I opened my eyes, blinking a few times to let them adjust to the light. Taking a breath I turned my head and saw Jonathan still sleeping and looking almost peaceful in his slumber.

This was my future now. And there was no running from it.

"What are you staring at?" His lips moved but his eyes didn't open. I thought for a moment if he was talking in his sleep as by brother Tristan had done often when we were children, but as I remember our previous nights together, I knew that he rarely slept.

How exhausting that must be, to sleep so lightly that you would wake at the slightest sound - but, I suppose it had its uses.

"You."

"I've noticed." His eyes opened this time as his head turned in my direction. "Why?"

I shrugged my shoulder carelessly. "Have you never had someone stare at you before?"

"Yes." His lips quirked up in a sinister smile. "But they no longer have eyes to stare with."

I stared at him, all amusement gone. "Why? Just for staring at you?"

"No, there were other reasons, but that pushed me over line."

"I bet there isn't much room between the first meeting and this infamous line of yours."

"No. There isn't." He fell into a silence of his own creation and stood from the bed, pulling on his pants and pacing over to lean against the window to watch the sun climb higher into the sky.

I knew I should keep my mouth shut. I knew I had to watch my tongue around him, but then I also knew when we were alone he tolerated these little discussions. I still wondered why though. Why did he tolerate my conversation? It wasn't for the thrill of an argument because as soon as I got overly defensive he would put me back in my place with a choke hold or a spank. It wasn't for intimacy or just pure company because he could get that from any girl he wanted. The question was slowly eating me and I craved the answer, but I didn't dare ask him about that yet. But instead, I thought about what I was to him for the moment. A mistress. And what did that mean for me?

"Was it true?"

"Was what true?" He didn't even look back at me, instead he only watched the sun as it continued to rise into the air and the orange glow of the sunrise coming up in the East was settling to blue sky's.

"What Jacqueline said." I clarified.

"Don't worry about it." His right shoulder rolled back as he moved his neck from side to side, waking up his muscles.

"I think I should I worry about it." I raised my voice slightly and sat up right. "If her words were true then isn't my life in danger?"

"No one is going to kill you unless I tell them too." He turned to face me with a calm expression.

"Surprisingly, that doesn't make me feel any better."

He shrugged and bent down to pick up a shirt off the floor.

"What about what Lord Gabriel said?"

"Ignore that idiot." Jonathan seemed rather calm today, where of late my questions would anger or frustrate him, today he seemed willing to answer. I wonder how far I could take this?

"Why do you let him disobey you so much. You are supposed to be a King."

He narrowed his eyes at me, clearly unimpressed. And that is how far I could take this. Looks like I had just reached my line. "What happened to 'keeping your mouth shut'?"

"I said I would keep my mouth shut to others, since you are the only one I am allowed to speak freely to, don't you think you owe me an explanation?"

"I thought you would have learned your lesson about how much trouble your big mouth might get someone in?"
Tilting my head slightly, I smiled sweetly. "Actually, your Grace. I have."

"Oh?" He raised his eyebrows at me as if to entertain this train of thought.

"Yes and after careful consideration I assumed that if you have already allowed him to disobey you for so long and by such lengths in full view of others, nothing I could say could possibly convince you to kill him any sooner." I smiled, still sure of myself.

Jonathan blinked a number of times as he regarded me with a slight confusion. "And how is a Blacksmith's daughter so educated?"

"Excuse me, we were discussing you not me. Don't change the subject." I scolded him.

His lips twitched up wards in one corner before quickly returning to its usual thin line of disapproval. "I am your King, I can change whatever subject I choose." He pulled on a clean grey shirt.

"But even Demetri..."

He grabbed my chin - stopping me from talking and pressing my lips together. "Understand this Little Miss, Demetri doesn't defy me, if he did he wouldn't be walking around so freely. His job is to watch out for my interests. He doesn't always agree with what I do or like it but he understands it and agrees it must be done - If he doesn't understand, he asks. I let him talk the way he does because I enjoy the challenge to prove him wrong."

"And Gabriel?" I muttered into his hand.

"That is different." Letting go of my chin, Jonathan bent down and picked up his shoes, moving to the chair in the corner and sitting down.

"How? What makes him so special?" I frowned, struggling to see how he was worth more than a fellow knight and friend.

He sighed deeply and stared at me, his eyes carefully reading my confusion and uncertainty. "Blood."

Standing up Jonathan picked up his belt off the floor and continued out of the room, leaving me to my thoughts.

Blood? I scrunched my nose as I considered the short word. But they didn't share any blood.

I sucked on my lower lip as I desperately tried to remember my past.

My mother had bought me with her to visit; the walls and rivers haven't changed much since then. Gabriel's father Richard was a high lord from further south where he and my mother were friends - living just outside the Kings isle.

I remember her telling me stories of the well-educated little boy who kept her company with old stories of dragons, giants and witches that lived in the woods. My own memory of Richard was an aging man with soft green eyes and small rough beard that had me tugging my mother's skirt whispering 'beast' to her.

Gabriel's older brother's Karlen and Lenard were there also. They were much older than Gabriel, dark hair like their father with the same green eyes, the only true difference was with Lenard. He was a lot thinner than the rest of the men, his shin was pale and his eyes held a dark shadow through them. My mother had told me he was ill - at the time I thought that meant he had eaten too much for dinner and had an upset stomach, but now, I knew there was much more in her words.

The images of the boys flashed through my mind as searched for something of value in the memory.

Frowning, I turned over in the bed and got to my feet. Quickly pulling on my tattered dress and wrapping my cloak around me, I ventured into the hallway.

People were scattering about with their daily chores as I made my back down to the main hall. We were to continue our journey to the Northern kingdom today and I could my blood boiling at the prospect. Once I crossed that border there would be new challenges. And worse, more people I would have to persuade and con into believing my lies. I never was a good lair, something that my mother both loved and pitied. She loved that I was mostly honest - or at least, that she could see through my lies like only a mother can - but she pitied me because I was a royal living in a court of lies no matter which kingdom I chose to call home. And lying was something you needed to master to survive at court.

I passed the open door and glanced out briefly. I saw Jonathan talking with some of his men while Demetri tended to a horse and the other man whom I met last night - Bertram - was tinkering with what looked like a piece of metal.

"Excuse me Miss." I turned to see a maid bowing her head slightly. "A coat for the journey. It gets cold up North this time of year."

"Oh, yes. Thank you." I took the coat from her and turned my head, following her direction.

I noticed a painting on the wall. It was a family portrait of the Lucama family. Richard, with a head of black hair and only a small barred. Karlen next to his father, almost as tall him looking to be in his mid-teens and appearing more like his father than I remembered him. Lenard sat in a chair still looking ill even at the age at twelve. Gabriel appeared only eight or ten maybe with seemingly blond hair and his brown eyes. His mother stood with one hand on Gabriel's shoulder. She had blue eyes and long blond hair, small and petite.

I narrowed my eyes getting critical with the faces. Gabriel clearly inherited his mother's hair as opposed to his father's. It happened, my own siblings and I varied in such ways. But on a closer inspection I stared at their eyes. Parents with blue and green eyes did not have a brown eyed child. Some brown eyed people had children with blue or green eyes but with other relatives having the same eyes. But on its own, no matter what way you looked at it, brown eyes always won over blue.

Richard wasn't Gabriel's father.

Blood. Jonathan's words echoed in my ears. They shared blood. Gabriel was a royal bastard.

"Hello there."

I jumped hearing a voice speak closely behind me. Spinning around I saw Gabriel smiling at me. "Sorry to startle you little Miss."

I put my hand over my heart and gave him a soft smile. "Oh that's quite alright. I've been easily to startle of late."

"Yes," he moved to stand beside me with his hands behind his back. "I can only imagine what you've been through."

His attention seemed to be on his family portrait.

"You look a lot like your mother." I wanted desperately to ask. But then again, did he even know? It would be dangerous for both him and his mother if she was ever to admit the truth about his birth, especially when his father's family were hell bent on murdering bastards and mistresses.

But if that were the case, how did he survive this long?

Gabriel scoffed. "We have the same colouring but that's where the similarities end I'm afraid."

I nodded even though he wasn't looking at me. "Where are your brothers? If I may ask." I added as an after thought remembering that now I was no more than a blacksmith's daughter and I could not demand nor command anything out of anyone. Especially on a topic as touchy as this.

"My brother Karlen moved to the South to join the Golden Army. He prefers wars and simple law enforcement than politics and dealing with the people."

"And your other brother?"

"Lenard died a few years back. He was always ill, I'm just glad my mother wasn't alive to see him pass. Would have broke her heart."

"I'm sorry." I apologized thinking it was the right thing to do.

"Nothing to apologize about."

"What about your father?"

"He moved to court to be closer to the King. He handles the country's finances."

"So your family is close to the King's?" Again I was trying to evaluate what I knew, against what Gabriel knew.

"Closer than either of us would like."

We both turned hearing footsteps approaching. Jonathan stood before us, his eyes menacing. "We're leaving."

"Safe travels your Grace." Gabriel mocked a bow.

I could feel the tension between the two like something so tangible I could grip it, hold it, and shake it until it fell into pieces.

"Miss. Demetri will get you saddled up." Jonathan spoke not daring to look away from staring Gabriel down.

I nodded knowing the hidden mean. Go now, I don't want you here to hear this. I walked out of the small castle and over to where Nicoli was checking the buckles of his own saddle.

"Which one is mine?" I bumped his shoulder.

"The brown mare." He gestured to a horse tied to a post. The saddle was held in place but there were no reins and I knew i was going to end up tied to someone else's horse like always. The mare herself had a gorgeous brown coat with black patches reach up each of her four legs like black socks and a patch of white covering her nose and face of her face.

"Does she have a name?" I asked mesmerized by her. She was a much greater beauty than my white mare at home who never liked me much anyways.

"Why don't you give her one since you'll be sticking around."

"Any suggestions?"

"She bit me this morning so I don't think it appropriate to say what I would call her."

I giggled at that. "Nippy it is."

Nicoli laughed. "That was not the name I was going to suggest, but that will do all the same."

I walked over to Nippy and reached out to stroke her neck. She let me gently pat her and didn't appear to mind the attention.  

***

Hello! and yes I am still here! I have not disappeared or fallen off the edge of the earth just yet. I know I have taken so much time in updating but I can explain. I am in desperate need to boost my grades to get the option of continuing into my doctorate. This means I don't get to write as much and when I do find free time I spend it sleeping.

So... I will continue to update when I can which may not be regular until I pass this year.

I do hope you can all stay with me. I do have a lot in store for this story and am looking forward to writing more!

Thank you all!!!

Please vote and comment.