This chapter contains some soft mature content and the mention of blood. Please read with caution. 

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Isla blinked. Her eyes were wide, and her veins felt frozen as she watched Draco stand there, in the middle of the hallway, forcing people out of the mansion he just bought.

He bought a mansion for her, Isla still had trouble processing the fact that he did. She had such a hard time altering everything as she stood in the middle of that corridor, people rushing past her to leave.

Theodore was there. That was all her mind managed. He was there. He lied. His mother didn't despise her as he'd told her she did.

She wanted her to visit. She hugged her. She was kind, warm and he painted her out to be someone that would disown him for even speaking to her.

Isla was upset. She was furious and sad and angry and confused. She didn't know what she was. Everything came pouring across her at once.

''Fucking hell,'' Draco huffed out, dragging both his hands through his hair as he looked at the last guests finding their way out, ''What the hell was that about, Clarke?''

Isla gulped. Her insides wrenching as she turned around. She didn't want him to see the tears in her eyes. She trusted Theodore. Isla placed all her faith with that boy, and to have him betray her and lie to her in the way he did cause her to feel sick.

''Clarke—''

''I just—'' Isla shook her head, tilting her chin up, and she inhaled deeply, ''I don't know.''

''I just kicked out my best friend,'' He gritted his jaws, feeling as if he'd done something unforgivable, ''I just kicked out my best fucking friend for you, and you don't know?''

''Well, I didn't ask you to do that!'' She snapped, turning back around to face him, ''I didn't ask you to do anything like that for me. If he refused to leave — I would've. I didn't ask you to do that. I don't even know why you would do that, Draco? Why did you do that? I said that I didn't want to come between you—''

His eyes darkened, a mighty storm arose in his irises as he narrowed them in hers, ''What the hell did you just say to me?''

''You heard me, Draco.'' Isla stood her ground, folding her arms across the red silk she was wearing, ''I don't know why you would—''

''You don't know?'' The muscle in the curve of his jaw ticked. His eyebrow twitched, ''You don't fucking know?''

Her lips parted. Isla wanted to say something, to say that she did know and that she deeply within was so thankful for what he did because she wouldn't be strong enough to walk away from Theodore, but before she even had the chance to speak, Draco chuckled out darkly.

''You don't fucking know why I did what I did?'' He raised his voice, taking a step towards her in the empty hallway, ''How damn clueless can one person be, Clarke? You're all smart and clever when you want something to be said, but when it comes to realizing something that's right in front of you — you're fucking stupid, Clarke.''

She swallowed the lump in the back of her throat. He was shifting so infuriated with her.

''You're one ignorant fucking witch, I hope you fucking know that.'' He spat, taking another step closer, and another, and another until her spine was pressed against the wall behind her, ''So fucking clueless.''

His hands pushed into the wall, one on each side of her head. He trapped her in, his breaths fanned her exposed chest as his eyes stayed so angrily locked in hers, ''But you're my ignorant fucking witch, and that's the bloody problem.''

She felt like the air left her lungs the very second he gritted those words. She felt stupid. She felt like such a moron for not understanding that this was about him caring for her. Isla already had so little of that affection when it came to Malfoy, and the utter fact that she was questioning it now caused her to feel ashamed.

''Draco—''

His fist collided with the wall beside her, leaving a hole in the wood as she gasped at the blood splattering around them. The sound of a bone cracking ripped through them both. He grunted, cocking his head at what he'd done, ''Shit.''

''Oh my—'' Isla turned to her side, her shoulder fused with the wall as she gently took his hand in hers, ''Draco, you can't just—'' Biting her own tongue, she figured that he'd probably throw her out too if she gave him a lecture, ''Come here.''

Malfoy marched after her with heavy steps, not pleased at all with what just happened. He felt bad. So bad for being violent around her again. He didn't mean to, but something about that chaotic girl caused him to lose it every damn time, and he cursed himself for doing so.

She took him to the kitchen she'd spotted earlier, making him sit down at one of the chairs as she got a cloth and warm water out. Isla knew that this could easily be solved with magic, but being so used with a mother that didn't practice spells, she preferred taking care of wounds and injuries like this.

She settled everything she needed on the table in front of them before slipping down onto a chair herself, ''Tell me if it hurts,'' She mumbled, her eyes fixed and focused on his hands as Draco's eyes stared at her, ''Is this okay?''

''Mhm,'' He tried not to enjoy her taking care of him more than he should've, but he did. He adored the way she looked so focused, so balanced in what she was doing, cleaning his knuckles from blood carefully before wrapping it up in a bandage.

He was so unwillingly attached to her. He didn't want to be as embraced as he was. All love had caused him was pain. He hated the idea of falling for someone —someone but her.

Isla made it seem so effortless. She made love look like something light and easy yet so dark and heavy. She was similar to a thunderstorm, unknowingly ruining everything that comes in her path, but she was also that calm fallout that tricked the world and soothed everything vile in its course.

Draco couldn't quite figure her out yet. He didn't want to. He liked getting to know her. He enjoyed pushing her boundaries and making her want more. It was more than a chaotic mess in his head as he stared at her, seeing how she smiled at her doings.

''There you go,'' Isla nodded towards his hand, lifting her gaze to level his, ''Does it feel alright?''

Draco bit down his lower lip, keeping it solid between his teeth for a mere second before he arched forward, just enough for his face to space inches from hers, ''Feels fine,'' He said coldly.

Isla gulped again, feeling nervous at his closeness. He noticed without falter, and suddenly, his hand flew to underneath the seat of her chair, and he dragged it into his.

''How can I thank you for this, Clarke?'' His voice was hard, demanding. Already knowing the answer before speaking the question, yet he spoke it anyway, but there was something Isla didn't recognize in his tone as he asked again.

There was a dash of softness as it stained the husky note. This made him feel. Her caring for him even when he was the one doing the wrong thing — caused him to feel.

''Tell me why you kicked Theodore out,'' Her own voice was so thin, so uncertain, ''I want to hear it.''

Draco sucked his cheek in, looking away with lazy lids, ''I can't do that, Clarke. You know I can't.''

It shouldn't hurt so much. It shouldn't ache in her chest as he spoke those words. She shouldn't be in pain because he couldn't tell her that he indeed was in love with her. He refused to. He always did.

That left her wondering if he'd ever tell her those honest words or if they were meant to keep going in this constant loop of back and forth.

Because that was all, they did. They felt, they messed up, they got close, they strived for distance. All the time. Over and over again. They didn't stand a chance when all they did was denying everything that was happening between them.

Isla looked away, forcing a smile as she nodded, ''I know,'' Pain rushed through her veins, and it turned unbearable. She stood up hastily, ''Well, thank you for tonight, Malfoy.''

He frowned, feeling his own pain as it ached within, ''Clarke, what are you—''

''I have school,'' She kept that bitter smile on her lips as it hurt them both, ''We all can't be as lucky as you and be excused for work.''

Tell her to stay. Tell her to stay. Tell her to fucking stay.

Draco looked down at the floor, still seated on his chair, ''Clarke.''

''It's alright,'' Isla moved further away, standing on the other side of the table now, ''I knew what I was getting myself into.''

Malfoy didn't think it was possible to drown in words so simple as the ones she told, but it was.

Her arms crossed over her chest, nearly covering herself up a bit. She felt exposed, embarrassed, ''It's not your fault that you can't fall in love with me. You don't control those feelings.''

That was it. His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach. It crashed, and it fell, and it burnt a hole that would bleed until she took those words back.

Malfoy didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to become what both of them hoped he would, so he stayed silent. Still, with his sight plastered to the floor, he caught how her heels echoed down the corridor.

Coward. Fucking coward, he damned himself.

She had walked away from him enough times for him to hear on the steps she was taking in what mood she was leaving in. This wasn't anything he'd caught before. These were both severe steps, direct and stabile ones, yet so hesitant and unsure.

Placing his elbows on his knees, he gripped the roots of his hair, groaning at himself.

''You know what? It's not alright. You are a coward—''

Something struck his shoulder. He snapped his head, looking right up at her as she stood with a plate of dessert in her hands. She threw another piece of sweets towards him, ''Clarke, what the—''

''I'm not doing this anymore, Draco—'' She threw another, ''I can't wait for you to try and feel something more for me anymore—'' Another, ''I can't go around, holding back from being with Theodore just to give you a chance when all you do is playing me.''

Draco inhaled and exhaled sharply, but he didn't resist. He deserved this. He deserved the rage she was feeling at this moment. He hushed, simply staring at her.

''You say that I'm yours and that I own you—'' Isla was slightly heaving. Her chest tightened more and more for every breath she breathed, ''You said that there couldn't be anyone else after me, that I was it. That I ruined you for everyone else, still you can't fall in love with me?''

He kept his icing eyes drilled through hers, straightening his shoulders.

''I don't even know if I want you to fall in love with me,'' Her voice thinned for each word now, ''I don't know if I want you to, but I want you to at least admit that you feel something. I need you to give me something.''

He didn't.

Draco gave her nothing.

It ached even more within her now as she dropped the plate to the ground, shaking her head. She didn't even know what she was fighting for anymore. It felt like a lost cause to her no matter what she did.

''Fine,'' Her eyes didn't match his anymore. The spark of trying went out. She didn't know what to think. She felt used yet not. She felt like he only spoke with honesty to her when they were sleeping together, like that was all she would ever be to him.

He ever so told her something yet showed her something else.

''I'm done,'' Her words felt like a knife through his heart because he didn't just see it. He felt it. He heard it, ''I don't know what this is anymore, Malfoy, but whatever it is... I can't do it. It's starting to hurt.''

He never wanted to hurt her.

''I'm sorry that I wasn't enough for you. I wish I were, but I'm not, and it's not fair to either of us to keep this going when it leads nowhere.'' She peered down at the ground, backing away again. The silk covering her body caught her mind for a second. She felt bad too. She felt awful, ''I'll make sure that this dress is sent back to you.''

He had to grit his jaws not to speak. She didn't deserve this. He knew that. Isla didn't deserve his constant change in behavior and his life as it'd never been messier. He didn't want this for her.

''Take care, Malfoy.'' She said before she walked away. This time there wasn't any hesitancy in her steps. It wasn't any doubt. She was sure of this, he could tell.

Isla was walking away. She was leaving something she tried so hard to fight for, something she tried to stay for, and it caused his heart to shatter. It made him bleed out a bit faster.

Fucking hell.

''Clarke!''

Nothing. All he heard was the front door slamming shut.

He panicked. Draco panicked as he flew to his feet, running after her.

It wasn't until he opened the door and he saw her walk her way down the driveway, he knew how much he fucked up. How completely foolish he was.

She had all right to walk away. Isla had all right to leave and be upset with him because he treated her badly almost every time. Their first months together, he'd been nothing but mean to her, and when he finally felt like he was ready to let her in — he granted her tiny pieces of himself, only to take them away when it suited him.

Draco hated himself for doing that to her.

''Clarke!''

Isla heard him, but she didn't stop. She didn't want to stop. She wanted to go. She didn't want to be stuck in that endless loop of cat and mouse they ever so played. It wasn't fun anymore. It began to ache instead.

''For fucks sake—'' He landed in front of her, apparating to catch up. He stood solidly ahead of her now. He caused her to stumble back, ''Can you listen to me?''

''Malfoy,'' She backed up, shaking her head and boring her sight to the woods around them. She'd cave if she looked at him. She knew she would, ''Please. Just let me go.''

''Clarke.''

''No—''

''Just listen—''

''I don't—''

''Just—''

''No!'' She shouted frustratingly. She was going crazy at the way he failed to hear her, ''Don't you understand? This is me removing myself from this mess! I can't do it anymore. I don't want to listen. I can't listen. Why can't you just let me go—''

''Because I fucking can't!''

She held her breath now, her eyes finding his.

''I can't let you go. I'm fucking—'' He snapped back himself, throwing his arms out in defeat, ''I'm so fucking dependent on you! I'm fucking hooked, Clarke. I'm trapped in everything you are. I can't let you go. I don't want to!''

Her lashes fluttered as she tried to understand what was happening.

''I can't,'' He heaved, his chest close to rupturing of all the emotions he constantly buried, ''I can't fucking let you go. Don't you think I would've if I could? Do you think I want this for you? I have tried to force you out of my life so many times, Clarke, but I can't fucking stand it. It's like... It's like I can't fucking breathe without you.''

''Draco...''

He stormed up to her unexpectedly. The palms of his hands caught her jaws, and he held her so close, ''I can't let you go, Clarke, but I can't give you what you want. Not yet. I can't be what you want me to be yet, but please—''

Malfoy was so desperate for her. She was the one thing keeping him sane.

''Please don't give up on me,'' His forehead tipped to hers, he closed his eyes, ''Please, Clarke. I fucking beg you not to let me go. Don't let me fuck this up.''

Isla felt tears in her own eyes. Her lips pressed together, ''Draco....''

''Please,'' He begged her, over and over. He didn't know what else to do, ''Don't let me go. Not yet, Clarke. I asked you to wait for me. Please.''

Her heart was breaking for him.

Isla knew that Draco had his own fair share of luggage, that he carried something so heavy on his back, and that his life was wrecked and shredded apart just like hers, but she never thought he'd be so dependent on her. That he would stand there, holding her from walking away and begging for her mercy.

''Okay,'' She nodded, tears rolled down her chin and over to his, ''I will wait. I won't let you go.''

''You're mine,'' He was shaking. His limbs shattering in everything he ever did to make her feel as he was feeling now, ''I don't care about the world, Clarke. When you're with me — you're mine.''

It didn't take much more than that until her lips pushed to his and his arms wrapped around her. Her thighs squeezing at his waist as he lifted her. Draco snapped his fingers, causing them to flee through magic back to his Manor, where he placed her on his bed.

He kissed her. She kissed him. Her breaths on his shoulder and his hands in her hair. She ripped his shirt off. He tore her dress to pieces. She moaned as he kissed his way down her stomach, pleasing her to an unspeakable extent.

This wasn't what they were used to. This was something else, something pure, something honest. This was the most of them both. This was their feelings wrapped and tangled in another.

He was so head over heels in love with that girl. He was so crazy for her that he allowed her to take out everything on him. He was just so scared to show it, to be what they both hoped he could be.

''Fuck,'' Draco groaned as he pushed into her, his hands on each side of her head. His body was so close to hers. Her thighs around his hips to bring him even nearer, ''You're it. I can't live without you.''

His hips bucking against hers, rolling with such ease as she kissed him. Isla kissed him over and over. Her fingers clawing down his back, ''I need you,'' She whispered into his mouth, arching her spine to be closer to him, ''I need you so much, Draco,''

He fell to his elbow, his lips moving in sync with hers. It was breathtaking. It was beautiful. It was them. It was them finally being something more. It was them finally letting each other in. Them. Them. Them and only them.

Draco was praising her body with his. They didn't speak it. They didn't say it — they simply knew, both of them. He held her so gently. He pushed into her so respectfully. He was becoming so much more for her, with her, to her. And she was becoming everything to him.

His mouth on her jaw, below her ear, on her shoulder, on her chest, on her fingers, on her arms, on her forehead. Everywhere. He was everywhere. He was placing himself all over her and hoping to everything that she wouldn't let him go.

He was falling. Draco was slipping and crashing for her. He didn't know what to do now, how to function without her, and it terrified him. It made his pulse quicken and his heart pound.

''Clarke—'' He looked down at that beautiful mess underneath him, her eyes leveled his. He panicked. Draco froze as he kneeled back.

''Draco—'' She breathed, lying chaotically on the bed, but it was too late. He had already sheeted himself in one of the covers and walked out.

_____

Isla didn't dare to go downstairs. She didn't go downstairs for hours after that happened. They were finally becoming something more. She was so close to having that piece of his fragile heart, but every time she even got close, he fled.

Draco did what she used to do. He ran, he escaped, he hid when his feeling turned too overwhelming. She couldn't blame him.

It wasn't until far past midnight, she finally earned the courage to walk downstairs. Her feet were light as feathers upon the red-painted ground. She looked through every room for him. For minutes, almost half an hour, she strolled around, looking and seeking.

''Oh God—'' Isla's hand fled to her mouth. She muffled the sound of her own gasping the moment she managed to get into the library, ''God, Draco—''

He was lying on the sofa, one arm on the floor, the other over his face. His legs draped the backrest of the furniture as bottles, three empty bottles stained the ground around him.

''Draco...'' She whispered, kneeling next to him. The bitter scent of alcohol tore through her senses the second she got close. He was drunk. He was so so drunk, ''Draco, come here.''

Her fingers brushed some hair out of his closed eyes, bending the arm over his head down to his side, ''Let's get you to bed, Draco....''

Her voice was low, timid. She was scared for him. Isla had never seen him in a state like this before. He barely gave her a grumble back as she helped him up on two feet, allowing him to lean all of his sorrows onto her.

She could almost feel his pain, everything that was catching up to him, everything she tried to understand.

''Careful—'' She gasped as Draco nearly tripped over the threshold, stumbling forward a bit with her arm wrapped around his chest, his own arm splayed out over her shoulder, his lips pressed into the side of her head, ''Please be careful, Draco.''

He hummed something, his eyes lazily closed, and his breathing was unstable. Never had she seen Draco this drunk. This out of his own mind. He stumbled closely to her, keeping her hooked in his arm almost all the way to his room.

''Draco—'' Isla gripped him harder, feeling as his knees weakened and his body caved. She kept him solid, ''You need to be—''

''I fucking love you,'' He muttered.

Her heart stopped. She stopped.

She didn't know if it was his lack of forming proper words or if she simply heard it wrong.

''I am so fucking,'' He coughed out a hiccup before wrapping the arm around her shoulders tighter, ''I am so fucking in love with you—''

''Draco—''

''Pansy.''

She closed her eyes.

Isla squeezed her eyes shut. Stars prickled in them. Her teeth nearly shattered of how tightly she was gritting them. Pain. Nothing but pure pain.

''I love you, Pansy.'' He kissed her head again, the scent of alcohol lingered around them both, ''I will— I will always love you.''

She felt tears. Tears streamed down her pale cheeks. She couldn't breathe. She didn't want to breathe.

Isla tried to loosen the grip of his waist, but the second she did — he pressed her against the wall. His face was so close to hers, his hands pinning her into the red color. He kissed her. His lips crashing against hers.

She didn't kiss him back.

She tilted her head a bit to the side, trying to escape what he was doing to her. He was still in love with Pansy. It would never be her to him.

Draco kissed her over and over. His mouth moving against her numb lips, ''Why can't you—'' He breathed, his forehead dropping to her shoulder, ''Why can't you love me like I love you, Pansy? Why did you leave—''

Isla sobbed out quietly.

''I love you so much, Pansy. I love you so much.'' He muttered, kissing the skin of her collarbones, where the t-shirt she'd borrowed from him had slipped down, ''Never leave me, Pansy. I can't live without you.''

Isla nodded rapidly as she took his waist in her hold again, and she led him with her. She followed him into his room. He dragged her with him down in between his sheets, and he placed himself over her.

Just like they'd been lying before. Just like he towered her when he said that she was it for him. That she was the one he couldn't live without.

He lied. He lied. He lied.

''Draco—'' Isla tried to keep her tears under control. Her chest was restrained. It felt like she couldn't breathe. His clothed body weighted so much more on top of hers now. She didn't want him there anymore, ''Please, Draco—''

He fell off her, nestling up in his suit pants and shirt beside her. He was finally falling asleep, ''There won't be anyone else but you, Pansy....'' He yawned, his breathing slowed, ''I love you so much.''

Sleep. That was all she begged for him to do. All Isla wanted for him to do was to fall asleep so she could leave. Suddenly, Isla couldn't stay for him anymore. She didn't want to.

This was it for her. This was her believing that he simply fooled her. He had fun with her while being in love with the girl who broke his heart.

Draco Malfoy could never be hers.

Sleep. Just fall asleep. Those words went on repeat in her head until she finally caught those tiny sounds he made.

He fell asleep.

She broke.

Isla stood up, gathering all the things she'd left in his room, except everything he got for her. She took the pieces of the red dress, the underwear, the jewelry, everything, and placed them on the end of his bed.

She looked at him from the doorway, dressed in the same nightdress she arrived in three days ago. Her heart was shattering. Everything hurt.

They couldn't be anything after this. It was done now, over.

He would never love her as he loved Pansy. She knew that now, and it hurt more than anything ever had. It hurt more than she thought it would.

She always, somewhere deep inside, knew that he would break her heart. She knew he would, and he did.

It wasn't worth it anymore.

Isla walked away, leaving Draco Malfoy and everything they could never be behind.

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