How To Die

The officers seemed distracted as they half-heartedly told Cole what his rights were and the next moves that were going to be taken now that he was under arrest.

They told him any sentence he received would be lightened if he just admitted that he had accomplices and named them all.

Mr Chandra, the shop attendant had told them there had been at least four of them, he was a bit groggy, it wasn't the just the fact that the group of them had assaulted an unarmed man, they'd also been carrying a weapon.

But Cole didn't really see the point in giving up the names of the others, in a twisted way he wanted to serve time, he had been idiotic enough to go with the plan, the one thing he was proud of was the fact that he hadn't abandoned an injured man, it barely made up for his actions but he knew if he had ran he would have ended up turning himself in anyway.

There was no point in involving anyone else, he didn't exactly care what happened to his so-called friends but he wasn't a snitch.

The tallest police officer Sergeant Derby looked extremely uneasy, he was meant to be keeping an eye on Cole but every few seconds he jumped on to his feet, paced up and down the corridor or made frantic hushed phone calls.

Curiosity finally got the better of Cole.

"Did something happen? Why is everyone acting so strange?"

He didn't know why but his heart was speeding up, beating in an irregular fashion and he felt dazed like he wasn't really in the cramped room.

"There was a fire"

Cole was surprised Derby had even answered his question, he was a juvenile delinquent after all, but Derby wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Son, where did you say you lived?"

He'd filled out the form as soon as he arrived at the police station, he didn't understand why the question was even relevant, weren't they meant to have called his parents right now?

"Fern Tree Lane, why?"

The man's face went white, he had to sit down on the spinning chair, he looked like he'd rather be anywhere else but that room at this moment.

"What number...?" he managed.

"46 but why?" Cole was beginning to really panic now, something was wrong, something was so very wrong.

"Son..."

"Stop calling me that!"

"There was a fire... thats were all the officers have been, a massive fire, we're not sure how exactly it started but what we do know is that there have been casualties"

Time stopped.

"A fire where?"

"46 and 47 Fern Tree Lane"

Derby tried reaching a consoling hand out him but Cole shrugged it off.

"Your lying, if this is some kind of twisted joke, some kind of way to make me confess it isn't working, your a liar"

"I know this must be hard for you, we still need to confirm the bodies identities with our coroners, but right now your still technically under arrest, I'll have to wait for you to be granted bail, but then everything can be arranged"

He was speaking too fast and his words didn't make sense at all, Cole couldn't connect them with his parents, with his house, it couldn't have been burnt down.

But the expression on Derby's face looked like he would have said anything he could, but the truth was unavoidable.

Cole was numb, he didn't know how to feel.

Two days later he had a visitor, the officers had left him virtually alone in this space of time, none of them wanted to try and talk to the prisoner who'd lost his parents.

He sensed Chase's presence before he saw him, if he thought he looked bad, Chase looked a hundred times worse, he stood in the doorway wearing an expression of abject despair, with a hint of anger.

"So Cole... on the night where a fire started in our home where exactly where you? I know where I was, fifty miles away in a tent, but what I didn't know at least until the police got hold of me yesterday was that my brother was part of an armed robbery when he should have been at home! And then of course" 

His voice broke.

"They told me about the fire, about Mum and Dad"

"Chase I'm so sorry, it was reckless I know it was, I've been thinking about it every minute since, I should have been there, I should have been there to raise the alarm... to try and save them"

"Yes, you should have" spat out Chase, looking at him with something resembling hatred.

"Mum and Dad are dead, gone and there's nothing I can do about it, do you know how I felt when I got the call? I felt like my entire world was dissolving, like the Earth had split open and swallowed me whole, instead of gallivanting around town playing at being a hardened criminal with you waste of space friends you should have been at home, you could have saved them"

Chase was right, he could have saved them.

It was all his fault.

"I can't even look at you right now Cole, they want me to pay for your bail but I don't think that's a good idea, if we're in the same room I might do something I'll regret... and anyway I have a funeral to organise"

He was crying now, angry tears.

"Cha-"

"You've done enough Cole, I hope you get a long prison sentence, I hope you get what you deserve, you've destroyed this family, in fact I wouldn't say we're family anymore"

It was what he had been expecting, Cole hadn't allowed himself to express any emotion up till now, but when Chase closed the door he lifted his hands to his face and began clawing at his own skin, his parents were dead, his brother hated him and he would have liked to never leave these four cell walls, to never accept that he had become a hideous person, the kind of person who went out with his friends instead of looking after his worried Mother.

He didn't sleep, every time he shut his eyes he saw orange sparks and his screaming mother, his gasping father and Chase standing over him.

"This is on you Cole, you killed them"

Sergeant Jones screamed that morning when he came into the cell and saw a bloodied Cole crumbled in the corner of the room, brick dust surrounding him, his face streaked with tears and tarmac.

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