Deep End - Ruelle

The performance ended just as fast as it started, and it felt more like it breezed through Jimin's eyes rather than enjoying the routine like how he usually does.

However this time, he didn't feel anything while he danced or did the steps he has memorized by heart after he continuously practiced it to perfection; He just skated and performed, that's it.

The reason more so being like this is because he knew if he were to let a slip of emotions out, just a tiny bit of more facial expression to reveal an oozing sentimentality to the music, than he would possible throw a fit out there on the ice. The song, the situation that happened earlier, everything was just a massive spiral of bubbling emotions that he couldn't control.

But he held it in together, just as the song ended.

Don't get him wrong, he's not hurt by what Jeongguk told Namjoon and for that being the reason why he's like a ticking bomb right now; As if he gets hurts by shit like that easily.

He's just so fucking annoyed.

Never did he ask Jeongguk to copy his habits or his life style! Or for him to be influenced by it. He never begged him to stay in the program or even tried to toil with his head! It's been the total opposite since Jimin always looks for every corner to escape from him to avoid some type of deep affection since the beginning, until towards the end of repaying him back.

And the only time he showed something, by letting Jeongguk kiss him and touch him despite his utter anxiety to that contact 1 this shit back fires right back to his face like a damn slap.

And then he's the one to get the blame for shit.

This is why he doesn't trust people!

They're all so damn sensitive!

There was only one person who wouldn't turn his back to him, that made Jimin not think that he was a damn nuisance to someone..... But he had to let him go, and no matter what he does now Jimin can't get him back.

And it's better off that way.

He's just tired of this.....

If Jeongguk's being irresponsible, then take the blame like a decent person! If they had something going on, Jeongguk doesn't need to be telling Namjoon details or even excuses about it! It's none of his business!

Fuck! Jeongguk needs a damn spine!

Jimin storms into his dressing room, ice skates in hand, and the second he stepped through the door the skate is abruptly being thrown and slammed to the mirror; shattering it to pieces.

His hands are itching. To throw or hit something. To grip his hair and possibly rip his head off! Body erupting in rage, Jimin shoves everything off the dresser to the ground. Chair is being thrown, wall is kicked, clothes are being torn and ripped apart on the floor.

He's a mess.

A familiar mess that he can't control.

Why did he let his guard down? Why?

Shit, even Jimin is even learning sign language from the whole team - yes the whole team - just for him! After practice he would meet up with some of the teammates at random places, studying hard until he had it engraved in his head. Obviously he won't learn just in three weeks, but he can distinguish things now by how much effort he's putting into this.

All that effort going to complete trash because Jeongguk just had to be so fucking dense.

If Jimin is nothing to him, then hell he'll be nothing for sure!

Jimin lets out a aggravated screeched, sliding down against the wall with teary eyes glaring at the floor.

And unfortunately, he wasn't quiet enough.

Medic Yoongi storms into the room just minutes afterwards, taking in the state of the room before finding Jimin sitting on the ground with fingers scratching his arms aggressively with snarls and mixture of whimpers. He wasn't slow to react, thankfully closing the door behind him before reaching into his medic pack when he approached Jimin.

"Jimin, listen to me okay-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! Okay! I don't fucking need you!" Jimin angrily shouts, not making Yoongi react to the explosive emotion as he puts pills to the palm of his hand, "You are my living nightmare. You know that right? You are so fucking useless and I can't stand you- Ah!"

Yoongi suddenly slaps his hands to Jimin's lips, forcing the pills into his mouth.

"And I'm tired of not doing anything to help you," He mutters, blinking to Jimin's heavy glare, "Swallow the pills, or I will bring Taemin in here to make you take it."

That.....

That was the little key to his trigger.

The snap.

Taemin..... Taemin doesn't know.....

He can't see him like this...

Jimin's entire expression falls, body tense to the thought in his head of Taemin's concerned face to what Jimin has done. Yoongi just stares at him with a challenging stare. He would do it, without a doubt if Jimin continues to be stubborn about his health.

Either the easy way or the hard way.

And Yoongi is done being the nice guy.

So with hesitation, Jimin takes the pills in his mouth, slowly swallowing it down. Yoongi removes his hand and gives him a water bottle.

Then he gives him another pill, a different one.

Jimin didn't have to guess for which one that is for, and takes it without a fight.

And lastly a small little bottle.

Eye drops.

Jimin clearly didn't want to take this, but Yoongi only narrows his eyes. That was enough for Jimin to put two drops on either eye instantly, even if it stung a bit.

His medication.

For the first time since the the first few days after the.... Accident, he's taking his medication.

He hates it.

But Taemin can't know about this. He only knows Jimin suffers from a bad temper, if only he knew the deeper details to those sudden tantrums.

That's a secret Jimin will ever refuse to tell him, even if it kills him.

"You have to take these medications accordingly," Yoongi advises him, Jimin still refusing to look at him, "And you need to see your therapist too. That's the only way it'll help with your diso-"

"Don't even finish that," Jimin mumbles, now feeling as though his body is relaxed now, closing his eyes to how limp his limbs feel even after his performance, "I only took this because of Taemin. He doesn't know about it."

Yoongi hums, zipping up his bad, "I know," he mutters and gets to his feet, "How long before....You know."

Jimin subconsciously places his hands over his eyes, rubbing them from the sting he felt moments ago, "I don't fucking know. I just know it's progressive."

"I see," He says back, sighing before looking around the trashed out room, "Enjoy this while it lasts, who knows when one moment you'll be great and the next where everything changes."

And with that Yoongi turns around and walks it the door, leaving Jimin alone with numb eyes looking to the trashed out mess he made.

Only left to feel that guilt once again.

He brings his knees to his chest, and quietly begins to sob quietly to himself; this time making sure no one hears him.

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A/N:
Hey everyone!!!

So it took a bit of time to update and that's mostly due to the fact that I was traveling yesterday, but I got to my destination safely!!!

Any ideas with what's going on with Jimin? Or about the medication?

Let's see what happens!

I PURPLE YOU! <33