Valley Of The Dolls - Marina And The Diamonds

This is the first time in a while where Jimin feels like he's not mentally prepared as he would like to be, in general.

Usually Jimin oozes with confidence in his shows, performances, even while going to those ice skating practices when he knows he might fall on his face a few times. It could be that he just simply doesn't care or he's just immune to be emotionally intimidated by anything.

So what makes this different now? This feel of unease to the unpreparedness composure?

Well first off this morning after his breakfast date with Taemin, that went really well, but became a vomiting mess when he got back to his apartment. No, not because the food did him bad - if anything it was quite delicious - but because of the urging need he has now to stick his fingers down his throat and hurl whatever was in his stomach out. He doesn't like feeling full, or just the thought of food in his body.

Not like it's something he'll ever express out in the open either way, especially to his coaches - Both ballet and ice skating. Sometimes he finds random moments in his day where he would look to the mirror, criticizing his body to every single angle and curve- judging on how to perfect it to his ideal physic, and how to make it easier for himself to dance.

The answer became simple; Food had to be eliminated from the equation. If he wanted to do performances with partners, especially men, he had to be weightless to be carried and not grow tired because of a cheeseburger he had for lunch. The thought of anyone criticizing him for being too heavy gnawed his mind, eating away his consciousness to be perfect to get perfect results.

Once he began, he couldn't stop. His thrive with the need to be perfect became more like a light in a tunnel, desperate on reaching over to it to make his mark in this country as the best dancer in the world. To fully express himself on stage, regardless of who he's dancing with and not have any risks while doing so.

Food became just for show, but in reality he finds it unnecessarily if it means it's in the way of his progress.

After puking, he weighed himself to see he lost four more pounds in a week, now weighing 54 kg which is around 120 pounds.

It actually made him smile, but he still wasn't satisfied.

But besides that unpleasant morning, the main reason for his dwindle of unease confidence is to what happened after that when he got into the studio. It's not everyday that he gets a message from Jeongguk while he was in the midst of practicing his routine from the CD Taemin sent out to him, confirming it's Jeongguk himself and how he wants to meet up to discuss this whole skating thing.

Jimin wanted to ignore it, he really did, but at the same time he was curious. He can't be serious about actually doing this pair skating thing is he? Tomorrow is Jimin's last trail day, and if there's no partner than Jackson has said that he doesn't have to continue with the program.

What could Jeongguk possibly want?

Those thoughts banged Jimin's mind as he goes up the elevator to the address Jeongguk gave him. It's a bit weird having to meet up at his place, which just makes Jimin's mind wander if he has some ulterior motives since Jimin is the culprit to his brother's heartbreak.

This is not a public location, it's literally Jeongguk's dormitory.

Seems like he skipped over the first and second base and went directly to third.

The man doesn't wait.

Jimin rolls his eyes to those thoughts, getting himself mentally prepared to defend himself if worse comes to worse. Taemin has his current location on his phone either way, so if Jimin does need assistance than he will be ready.

Can never trust anyone these days so easily.

The elevator finally arrived to the top floor, letting Jimin out as he walks forward to the only front door ahead.

Well.... This is a little intimidating.

Now a bit more nervously, Jimin clears his throat and takes his phone out to send a quick text to Jeongguk that he's here before knocking on the door.

Jimin did have to wait a moment or two, but when the door opened he was met with someone that clearly wasn't Jeongguk.

This man has more of a tired hood in his eyes, almost as though he just woke up from a nap. He's pretty tall, maybe towering over Jimin a bit, but didn't look too threatening.

At least Jimin hope he's not.

"You must be Jimin," He yawns quietly, running a hand through his raven black hair lazily before moving aside, "I'm Seokjin, you must be Jeongguk's little date. Come in."

Date?!

The fuck?!

Jimin's eyes widen distastefully but hesitantly steps inside, kinda thankful to seeing lights pouring through instead of darkness. The first thing Jimin sees is the living room in front of him, a large leather sofa in front of a flat screen tv, connected with gaming consuls that were clearly not being used at the moment. No one is here, from what Jimin can notice with his sight and his hearing to the silence.

Hm, so cross off getting ganged up with beatings.

Now a little more eased, Jimin removes his boots and places it to the side of the door. He glances down to the shiny marble floor but moves his focus back to Seokjin, guiding him from the living room to the connected kitchen.

There he sees a familiar ravenette.

The man is sitting on a barstool, typing away on the computer with eyebrows furrowed behind his glasses. A large grey hoodie hangs over his body, hood over his head with the peaking of strands of his raven hair to caress the sides of his face and a bit over his eyes. It's such a contrast their styles of clothing. While Jimin is more of a business casual type attire for the winter, Jeongguk looks as though he's getting ready to just stay in the dorm all day and rest.

It's a bit refresh, makes Jimin feel more relaxed that this isn't such a formal occasion.

"JK, put that shit away. Jimin is here," Seokjin huffs to the boy, who didn't look up instantly after typing something more on the computer but then closes it shut to look up, meeting Jimin's gaze.

The two didn't say anything to each other, if anything it felt a little awkward. But Jeongguk waved a hand to the barstool across from island for Jimin to sit so they're face to face, and so Jimin quietly followed his quiet request and sits down.

To his surprise, Seokjin sits beside Jeongguk unbothered, but when he notices the look on Jimin's face he sighs heavily, "Jeongguk has a speech deficiency, so he speaks mainly through sign language and I'm here as translator, even though a tablet could've been useful."

Jeongguk sends him a look, to which Seokjin rolls his eyes but pats his arm in assurance that it's not a problem.

Jimin on the other hand grew even more confused, furrowing his eyebrows now, "But... He spoke during practice?"

"He can speak one syllable within a break of sentences, but it's sometimes hard to understand if you don't know what he's referring to," Seokjin explains with a wave of his hand while turning his full focus to Jeongguk's hands, "Anyways, I'm not here. Just merely a translator so anything I say, it's his words."

Well..... This is definitely new.

Namjoon never mentioned his brother to have speech deficiencies, so this is definitely new information. Even though Jimin's trust issues raised slightly with Seokjin's presence here, he knows him and Jeongguk wouldn't have a proper conversation without someone to translate properly what he wants to say.

Alright, let's get this over with.

Jimin sits up straight, fingers crossed on his folded legs, "So, why did you want to see me?"

Jeongguk's hands are shaking when he began to sign, especially when Jimin's eyes flickered to the way his hands move quickly in a way he began to wish he could understand.

"I wanted to talk about the pair skating event," Seokjin translated, eyes still focused on Jeongguk's hands, "Is this something you truly want to do? If not then why waste your time learning?"

This actually made Jimin perk a smile, maybe not the most enthusiastic smile but a sarcastic one. Now shaking his head, "That is my business on why I want to do it. If you're referring to if I'm going to continue learning? Well, tomorrow my trial ends and I'll get to go back to my daily routine."

"I'll ask again, is this something you want to do? Because you could've stopped if you didn't want to continue, but you didn't."

"Why is that important?"

"Because it will determine whether I agree to it or not," Jimin's face falls, eyes now locked with Jeongguk's gaze, "But if I will need you to meet me half way here. I can't be the one putting most of the work to connect with you while you complain about how horrible I do."

Now Jimin places his hands on the counter, fingers crossing over one another with eyes narrowed, maybe even twitching a little, "Why do you think I even need you?"

"Because I'm your last hope in remaining in that program. Jackson is not going to find you another partner, and no matter how good you are capable to be, if you don't adjust than he won't waste his time," This actually made Seokjin twitch a grin, "The only reason I would consider doing this is for therapeutic purposes. But if you don't want to do it, then we won't waste our time."

Okay, seems like Jeongguk is opening up a bit about his intentions, which is a bit refreshing to say the least. Usually Jimin would just do his part and refuse to connect, but clearly Jeongguk doesn't want that.

He wants to understand and see if this is worth his time, and if Jimin is willing to cooperate.

Well, the least Jimin could do is open up to him on some minor details.

So he huffs, blinking to the male with a frown, "The only reason I would consider doing this, or want to, is because I know I have a problem trusting people. My ballet coach strongly believes this program would help me.... And I'm doing this for him in a way," Jimin admits, maybe feeling a little annoyed that he had to open up about that, "So I want to do it."

Now this made Jeongguk's corner of his lips twitch up for a second, but that only last for a short time because it suddenly pulled down to a frown, "But.... Have you thought of the risks? Media? The public reaction? Your career or reputation? If we go in this, there's no turning back. We have to finish till the end, that's how I am at least."

Of course Jimin has thought of those things, well- had taken it to consideration. If anything he's not so worried about it anymore because he's so use to the media judging him as it is for his role choices. He wouldn't have lasted this long if he didn't consider the risks, but Jimin knows this isn't about him.

Athletes like Jeongguk have an image to uphold, a slight slip up could ruin his career if he doesn't follow his side of the norm. Even though an event like this would probably have him get praises instead of hate for showing a different duality to his performances, at least from Jimin's perspective.

The fear is still there of course, maybe that's why Jeongguk is asking Jimin if he's okay with this as a little push of reassurance.

So Jimin studies Jeongguk closely, his lips pressing tighter together, "If you can't handle the risks than don't waste your time. I'm a professional, meaning if I do something than best believe it's with the little piece of mind to what the people say about me."

This clearly left Jeongguk at a tough spot, maybe a bit conflicted since maybe this was something he didn't completely expect.

But Jimin wasn't done.

He leans closer over the island, making sure to look at Jeongguk directly in the eye to completely disregard Seokjin's existence.

"With that being said, I don't like a partner who can't keep up. I like someone who's to my level, that's not a little bitch and will keep up," Jimin's tone darkens, making Jeongguk tense up more in unease, "I expect you to excel and not make me look pathetic out there. You obviously have no experience in ballet or even the entire concept of figure skating when it comes to dancing, so practice. If I see you slipping up once, we can both forget about this."

This was like the final blow from Jimin's range of fire, putting everything down on the table with no room to even butt in an argument.

Jeongguk was left speechless, more than he already was. He was sinking it in, taking it all into consideration as it weighs in his head Jimin's sharp words.

After a while he purses his lips, furrowing his eyebrows a bit with a little narrow in his eyes, "Right..... But I also have my own rules."

Well..... This is new, usually no one really fights back with Jimin.

The sudden switch had Jimin sitting upright, eyes focused on Jeongguk's hands as he signs what he wants to say, "Just like you're a professional, so am I. My expectations will be that you do your part and I do mines, coming to practice prepared. This is a team effort, we have to work together and it can't just be me trying while you refuse to think you can't improve. Whatever I lack, you have to guide me, and best believe I'll do the same for you since I at least have experience on the ice."

Well Jimin can't argue there. Even if Jeongguk's form of ice skating is different than figure skating, he still knows how to manage well around it. The pick is still an issue for the skates but that's something he'll adapt quick, meanwhile Jimin still isn't a familiar skater.

Sure he has practiced well enough to not fall easily but he still struggles, and that's something Jeongguk can help him with if he lets him.

They both lack in areas but the other is strong in those parts that could fill in for it on making this work, so they definitely have to meet each other half way to make this perfect.

Without much to argue for, Jimin gives him a curt nod, but Jeongguk wasn't finished.

He leans over the island as well, staring at Jimin directly in the eyes with the stone look behind his gaze, "I still don't like you for what you did to my brother, so don't expect me to be so nice. I respect you as a dancer, but don't you dare provoke my temper. I have patience, but if you can't control your impulsive tendencies than I will leave. Now, do we have a deal?"

There was this confusion in Seokjin's tone when translated the brother part of the signs, but Jimin got the message. It's not like he is a nice person to begin with either way, Jimin has neutral perspectives about people and it's that they're only a problem unless they show how useful they can be.

He doesn't care if Jeongguk doesn't like him, that's his issue, he just wants that to not get in the way of them doing a perfect performance.

So with a scowl, Jimin clasp his hand over Jeongguk's, gripping tightly that felt like a direct line connection to each other's hearts to the compromise.

"We have a deal."

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A/N:

Ahhhhh here it comesssss!

Let the story begin!!!

I PURPLE YOU! <33