Loving someone who was the opposite gender and single was easy. Loving someone who wasn't the opposite gender but single was a bit harder. Loving someone who was the opposite gender and not single, hurt the most. It was like waiting for your heart to be broken. Gar was in that situation. He knew he needed to let Pat go, but another part of him couldn't. He didn't know what to do. The thought had been stuck in his mind for months now, but it had only gotten worse. He clearly wasn't at a hundred percent anymore.

Gar quickly joined the call to find that he was early, with only Wade and him in the call.

"Hey..." He started awkwardly. He didn't even dare to look at Wade's face cam knowing the older man was wearing that same expression of worry that he had been wearing all week.

"Gar, what's up?" Wade asked, obviously trying to keep cool but still he still had that small tone of concern in his voice.

"Uh.. The ceiling!" Gar answered, giving a little forced smile. Wade clearly didn't find this amusing at all.

"You remind me of that one uber driver..." Gar chuckled. Wade still didn't crack. An awkward silence floated in the air.

"Gar I know somethings up, you don't have to hide it." Wade finally said. Gar frowned. His plan was to keep the small talk going until the others got there.

"I just haven't been getting as much sleep... Dante has been pretty active lately." The curly haired man lied. He had spent all the time when he wasn't recording or streaming in his bed, either crying or trying to sleep. He had about 350 text notifications on his phone, at least 200 from Jp, talking about random nonsense and spam messages, 100 from Pat, trying to talk to him when they were not recording, and 50 or less from Wade reminding him of recording sessions.

Wade sighed. "Gar I'm so tired of your bullshit! Just tell me what's wrong!" Gar didn't hear the small sound Pat made when he joined the call over Wade's yelling.

"I like someone who's bound to reject me! I'm a failure waiting to happen!" Gar said, tears started to fall from his chocolate colored eyes. He didn't care that all his emotions were spilling out infront of Wade.

"Then why don't you just move on Gar?!? I know who you are talking about because you've had a crush on the same man for two years! Two years and you haven't done anything Gar! You let time slip through your hands! I got Molly because I told her as soon as I was sure!

"Don't remind me of my failures by telling me about your successes!" He snapped back.

"It's hard to see him so happy with her, knowing that could have been me!"

"Maybe if you told Pat how you felt, you wouldn't be such a drag on the group!" Gar felt like he had just been punched on the stomach. Molly had now recognised what Wade had been yelling about and had muted his mic to talk to her husband.

"Gar? I didn't know you felt that way..." Gar froze. Pat?!? When did he get here?!? He heard everything!!! Gar's thoughts seemed to swallow him whole. He quickly left the chat.

"Gar wai-" He was just gonna yell at you. You can't go back. They're gonna tell everyone... Why did you try? It was to never be...

The next day is when they got the call. Gar's dad came back from the vet with Dante with KFC, only to find the body of his son that he had raised for twenty five years, hanging from the ceiling. All he left was a few notes.

Dear Dad,
I'm sorry I had to do this. I just want you to know you where the highlight of my darkest days, not the cause of this, I love you so, so, so, much and would hate if you blamed this on yourself. Just know that me and mom are watching over you and Dante from the clouds, and know that you didn't deserve this pain.
Your son,
Garuku Bluemoon

Dear Friends,
I'm sorry I was such a drag on the group. You never should have had to deal with my bullshit over the years. I'm stupid and a bad friend and a hacker. I never deserved to be in Dem Salty Bois. You'll probably forget me in a year or two and have a replacement for me by then. Sorry for causing you trouble.
Your ass of a friend,
Garuku Bluemoon

Dear Patrck,
I should have told you how I felt before, but don't let me distract you. Marie needs you now, and she can help you over this better than I ever could. I'm sorry. I would right more but I have to go. I love you so much Pat, and I'm so fucking stupid for not telling you.
Your old stupid best friend,
Garuku Bluemoon

Pat couldn't help but cry when he read the letter.

"Gar, I don't know if you can hear me, but I'm sorry... I love so so much than you ever knew. Even if we could never be..."

Holy shit this was depressing as fuck... Sorry if it sucked... (Which it most likely did)