15: Adam
I know, somewhere in my addled morning mind, that the Veins are the same in the morning as they are at night, but walking through them at this hour, even with Evan at my side, makes the halls seem more foreboding than they've ever been. He has my hand as we trek through the darkness, past portals, and I get the impression we're dreaming. I'm not sure if it's the glove that's hot, or just his fingers, in fact, I'm not sure where the fire comes from, but I clench tighter and feel my own gloves begin to blister up. They do prevent me from being traced by my fingerprints, but they're not thick. In fact, the material is so breathable that it almost feels like wearing nothing at all- like we're touching.
"So." I sigh.
"Nothing." Evan sighs. Even in the dim light, I can see his other hand smoking, and he mutters. "Maybe it's a bad time."
"They were there at this time last week. We got two shards on our last mission. Have you considered that whatever they want from us, they have it?" I ask.
"You can't say that." he growls.
"Why not?"
"I... look. We'll have Serena back today, right? If not, I'll drag her uncooperative ass back in here myself."
I'm still proud of him for coming around. I squeeze his hand tighter.
His nostrils flare slightly as we approach the door. "Adam. I don't need your pity. I'm sorry for being a dick, okay? Can you pretend to be a little more upset with me?"
"It's hard. You're really cute when you're flustered." I say. "God, that feels good to say. You're adorable. Short, too. Have you noticed that even Megan is taller than you? Short." I draw my hand from his and place it on his head.
"It would be a lot less painful if you were just upset with me," Evan continues to gripe. He opens the door anyways, and we enter the lounge area of the Veins on the way back home.
"Had to bust out the back. Almost got sniped by robots, took another portal-" I yell into the empty room. "Thanks, Anthem, for your concern."
"I'm worried." Megan emerges from behind a bookshelf, tenderly placing a volume back into the shelves. The two of us must look like a mess, but she runs forwards and hugs us both anyways. Evan opens his mouth, and she puts a finger right in the center of his face. "Shhh. Sleep is for the weak. The only reason I didn't take the mission was because I thought I had a test that got cancelled. It's not like I could rest, anyways, knowing... what's important is that we're all here in one piece, right?"
"Business as usual." Evan mutters. "Not that you missed much. Meg, there was no one there today. It was creepy."
"Concerning," I add. "All around a bad time. Are you sure your family's not up yet, Megan? It's got to be around six, and I know your mom sometimes checks your room-"
Megan removes her finger from Evan's lip and taps me on the nose with it. "Mom's on a business trip, Harley's babysitting (poorly). Trust me, my siblings don't usually check my room. Plus, my house has like six bathrooms I can claim to have been in. I'll be back before they check any of them."
"Fine. Guess we'll have to idle for a few more minutes in this empty room, just to make it worth your time." I say, stretching my arms around them. "What a pity."
Megan laughs. "Time wasted. Can't imagine what the three of us would get up to in a dark room without parental supervision."
"We haven't even had a first kiss. Given how stressful our daily lives are, and the fact that there are literally three pairs here who haven't tried jack shit, that is a statistical anomaly." Evan throws his hands up. "How do you kiss with three people, anyways?"
"Alas. Think we'll have it down before we beat the Sanguine Delegation?" Megan suggests, ribbing my side best she can without moving herself out of my shoulder hold.
"Way too long." I say.
"Could be sooner than you think. Get Ser on it." Evan playfully shoves the side of my head. "Cafeteria. This morning."
"Fine, fine, I'm working it. See you two later." I say, turning towards the exit. The portal is already fit in front of it, which I'm hoping means Anthem is somewhere around here and knows what she's doing, but I'm not going to sweat it if I'm a few minutes late getting home. Will sleeps in now, anyways.
"Bye, nerds." Megan smiles.
"Adios." Evan blows a kiss to the two of us, one at a time, and I roll my eyes. Megan catches it and clutches it close to her heart.
Getting home is uneventful, though I have to admit it's strange slipping back into bed. Worse, I have to get up in five minutes, anyways, so I don't even bother going back to sleep. My heart races the whole way to school, through the entire awkward silence with Will (who has spent the entire walk on his phone, the hypocrite), and into the cafeteria. At some point I'm unsure if I'm thinking more about my meeting with Serena or about them, about us, but it's definitely Serena by the time I walk through those ugly double glass doors.
Serena sits by herself on the end of a table loaded with kids from the soccer team. She twirls a straw in a large drink from Starbucks, whose cover has been long since abandoned. Her skin is pale and her dark circles have swollen since we last talked. I tap her hand, and she looks up, quietly resigned to fate. "Hey." we say at once.
"Let me guess. Outside?" she asks, slinging a finger towards the door.
"It would be a little more private." I say, pursing my hands together.
We walk, and she leaves the coffee behind. The outside air is chilly, but not unpleasant, though the sunlight makes her look even worse. "What do you want from me, Adam?" she asks.
"We need you back, Ser."
Her eyes grow desperate, and her left hand trembles into a fist. "I don't know what this is like for you, but I feel like something's pulling at me. This isn't safe. This isn't healthy." Her voice is calm, every movement contained. "I don't know how much longer I can do this, Adam."
"Evan says he'll apologize-"
"It's not just fighting with him. I feel, quite often, that I'm just doing this plain wrong. Maybe I'm not a good fit for the team, my powers are awful, and I can't get Anthem- I thought if I quit, but it just gets worse- Adam, we're her tools. Don't you get that? Tools."
Anthem doesn't even stir in my mind. A breeze runs over us both, and I take a deep exhale before saying, "Serena. Your right hand is in your pocket. It's in there, isn't it? The stone, I mean."
Serena raises her hand. "How the hell did you know and what does it have to do with anything?"
"You carry it around all day, don't you? It'll come back, but you keep your hand on it, like it'll disappear on you. You don't feel safe anymore without it. Feels like someone's watching you."
"Adam. What the hell."
"Look- I know because I do it too. I know you think we're living the life but really all of us- Harper, Megan, even Evan, we're all scared. We're in way over our heads, and if we want this to be over, we're going to have to work together. I know you think all the 'choosing' stuff is bullshit, but I think that Anthem did see something in you. She entrusted that power to you because if anyone can pull it off, it's you."
"That's bullshit," Serena says. "This is bullshit."
"But you're back in."
She nods, weakly. "I've got stuff after school, though. Can we plan... around that?"
"When do you not have extracurriculars?" I sigh. "Hey. I have STEM club. We can walk over together."
"Deal." Serena dives her hand into mine and shakes hard.
My life is falling back into order again. I can feel my Diosite stirring in my own jean pocket, its thick heat coming in waves as it breaches my back.
This could work. Holy hell, this could work.
---
I can't even remember if I enjoyed STEM club back in the day. Now, it feels like torment, but the haziness of my memories give no clue as to if this was something I was passionate about or like attending a torture chamber after school twice a week. I want to walk over to the Naval Brigade, sit my ass down, and hold Megan Briggs's hand while she freaks out about nerd things I don't understand. I'll even tolerate Will being passive-aggressive about the time I've been spending doing important shit and his judgy friend making passes at Megan, but heck, I don't move a muscle. Looking at my half-finished plan for my mediocre, lackluster project and rolling a pencil, I search the room for ways to kill time.
Jack is with a few other boys at a table. All of them are talking, and Jack even waves to me. I have not responded to group texts in several months. I haven't so much as talked to him since Serena left.
I don't talk to anyone at school anymore. I wish I could say this disturbs me, but what really scares me is knowing I'll have to go back to being Adam Rosenbloom someday in the near future, instead of...
The teacher looks like he's going to approach me after class ends, but I duck out and start running. Serena is outside the school, near the bus lane, watching the ground. "Let's go back." she says. "Checkmate. You guys win. Just tell me one thing."
"Whatever," I say. "Let's just start walking."
She picks up into an athlete's walk, the brisk kind, but her eyes are still on her feet. "Do you... like this?"
"More than anything I've ever done. Do you really hate it?"
A smile flickers across her face. "I wouldn't have been so adamant (pun not intended) about its effects if I hadn't felt it. When I get how something works out, it feels like- suddenly everything clicks. I feel alive, for a few seconds. It's like solving a puzzle. I get a rush from my other activities, too, but I have so much stuff in my life that I can't enjoy anything. I was just happy to get away from it for a second." The entryway to the Veins unfolds before us, the most direct entrance into our lair. She sizes it up like an old friend. "I fucking hate seeing these weird black marks. Literally the worst thing about all of this."
"Sure," I say. "Sure."
We enter together. In fact, Serena busts into the Lair ahead of me, to where Megan, Evan, and Harper are messing around with the settings on the leather recliners. "I'm back, and I'm quitting track." she tells them.
"You quit a sport for us?" Evan asks. "That's almost impressive. Damn."
"No need to be surprised, I have two more sports, three clubs, and god knows how many 'leadership programs' in summer." Serena says, timidly.
"Gee, please keep rubbing your privileged lifestyle in my face." Evan smirks, sliding around the side of his leather chair to stand with his arms crossed.
Serena holds her arms up. "I'm not doing this because I want to. I'm doing this because I need to and I need to have it over. Is that clear?"
Evan puts out a hand. "I guess we're glad to have you back. Kind of."
Serena shakes it, then looks to Harper. "Do you have new information?"
"Do I ever!" Harper says. "No way in, though."
"Hit me up." Serena says. "Look, I studied a little before I left... and I think I have an idea. Give us a week at most- we're about to crack the Sanguine Delegation wide open."
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