Meow, mraw, maw, hissss

Sorry, I had something stuck in my throat. I think I'm good now.

So, you are probably wondering who I am? Well, I am Gayfish. Yes, sadly that is the name I have been given.

I was actually born with another beautiful name, but then some creepy guy had to buy me and

gave me that awful thing of a name. Who calls his pet Gayfish? Seriously, it's just animal torture.

Do you have any idea how the other cats stare at me when I'm taking a stroll down the street? They laugh at me!

I'm actually terrified for that creepy guy to come home again. Kisame is really nice. He takes good care of me,

but is trying to make me a vegetarian. I mean really, I need my bits of fish from time to time,

but nooo that man just won't let me have anything. I tried stalking fishermen, but when he found out he killed them all.

This is really not working at all. Maybe the creepy guy will bring me some fish again. That's the only thing he can do.

I actually never remembered his name. I only remember that I have to run away when someone

is starting to speak about explosions and says un a lot. What the hell is a un anyway? Never heard the word before.

You know what the blonde does to me when he's around? No, you don't right,

because he has to keep it a secret from Kisame. He will kill him if he ever hears about the awful things he does to me. The bas...

Sorry hairball.

Anyway, he makes little clay butterflies and lets me believe they are real ones.

I go after them and when I caught them, he makes them explode. That scares the hell out of me!

And I'm always outside at moments like that, so I can't hide under his closet. It's a really nice place and

the last place where he will start looking for me. He also scratches my ears way to rough, hurting them in the process.

Do you have any idea how delicate they are? You should handle them carefully with soft hands.

One time he gave me a bath! You don't give cats a bath! We hate the water, every fool knows that.

Well, apparently not everyone... He really needs to eat some brains or something.

Maybe that will make him a little smarter.

I got a tip for you. If you ever feel like your nails aren't sharp enough, use one of those wooden dolls.

They are perfect to sharpen your nails on, but make sure the maker isn't around.

He gets mad and threatens with purple liquid or something. Not sure what he wants to do with that grape juice,

but you never know...

Was that a red light? Did you just see the red light? There it was again! It's on the wall!

I need to catch it, I need to catch it! Yes, it's coming closer. Just a little more. It's under my foot!

No, it's on my foot. It won't get off! Run away from the scary red light!

Meoowww hisssss