So this is Deidara's diary, huh. Why am I writing this down? Is this some sort of jutsu?

I must say it IS calming. I'll just write some more.

Well hello there, Diary,

How are you? I'm very good. No, Zetsu's children did not bother me.

I'm still made out of wood of course. They did try to nibble on me and left some teeth marks.

I had to stop them from doing that, but I've been really insecure about my poisons lately.

I mean Deidara didn't even react when he drank liters of it. How will this ever be okay again?

I'm so depressed.

I should read some of Deidara's entries? Are they funny, because he's dumb?

Well, no arguing there. I can't believe he has to be my partner.

I should ask Itachi if he wants to trade? Alright, I'll read his entry too. First Deidara's parts.

I knew he blew up my puppet! I never should have given it to him!

It still was a horrible puppet, but he shouldn't have blown it up! This makes me so angry!

True, I'm not depressed anymore. I'll continue reading now.

I thought the running away from me, screaming and flailing his arms was weird.

I just thought he was practicing his damsel in distress role. I heard he wanted to audition, from Konan.

Oh, I was mistaken. Konan wants him to be a girl. I could imagine that. He would make a very pretty girl.

He was drinking grape juice! He fooled me. Very clever. I judged him wrong and you too diary.

He isn't that dumb. You should be nicer about your friend.

He has written pages full of crap in you and you're not being very nice about him.

He is still a good ninja, although his view of art is crap and always will be crap.

It's funny he even writes in a diary and doesn't blow it up afterwards. I should ask about that.

Itachi wrote something about me too? He wants to join the grape juice fun,

Well then I'll give them some fun on their second date. Wait, second date? They are dating?

Boyfriends? When did this happen? I thought I could marry Deidara and make him my slave(puppet).

This messes everything up. I'm not sure who I'm going after first, Deidara or Itachi.

Zetsu has an entry too? Oh, he's already after Itachi. Might as well let him do the job.

I'll go find Deidara now. I bet he's hiding in the kitchen. He'll think that's smart,

because flesh eating flowers would never cook their meat.

Yeah, I don't know where he gets the idea from.

I think I'll torture him some more. I'll tell him I need to examine him again and

because he doesn't want to confess his lie, he will come with me.

I could use that new thing I've made, could be really fun and I'm dying to try it out.

This is going to be great!

Well, diary. Thank you for all the information you have provided me with.

I will bring you to the kitchen, so when I can't find him there, you can give me tips.

Stay away from Zetsu's babies and farewell, Sasori