((There's so many good asexual jokes I CANT STOP))

"Where are we going to be in like, three days?"

Calum flicks the calendar hanging next to his head. "New York. We've got a hotel for that night, I think."

Michael hums in response.

Three days later, Calum's sitting in Ashton's hotel room bed, when there's a knock on the door. Ashton rolls to his feet and trots over to answer it, coming back with an envelope in his hands. He reads the front over with furrowed eyebrows, then looks up at Calum in confusion.

"Why did Michael send me a letter?" He asks. Calum shrugs, so he turns it around and rips it open. He reads it over, then rolls his eyes and smiles slightly. "This is a formal statement, meant to inform you that I am officially demiromantic pansexual. Sincerely, Michael Clifford." He reads out.

Calum snorts out a laugh. "Oh my god,"

°°°°

"Did you guys know that only one percent of the population is asexual?"

Ashton glances up from his bowl of cereal and stares at Luke thrilled expression blankly. "Yes," he responds dully.

Its quiet again, Michael's foot twitches where its hooked around Calum's ankle under the table.

Luke glances at both of them nervously, then goes back to smiling. He nudges Ashton with his elbow. "Did you know the asexual flag is purple, white, grey, and black?"

Ashton drops his spoon and shoves away from the table, leaving his bowl of cereal and stalking back towards the bunks. Luke frowns and sighs heavily, running a hand through his hair.

"You tried, Lukey," Michael amends. "He's just stubborn, he'll come around."

Luke stares at the forgotten bowl sadly, like Ashton's died and that's all that's left of him.

"Yeah, he'll come around," Calum agrees. He untangles his ankle from Michael's and his removes his hand from Michael's, forcing a whine and pout from him. "I'm just going to go check on him, I'll be right back."

"Tell him I'm sorry," Luke mumbles, like he hasn't said it himself a million and ten times. Calum nods though and wanders back to the bunks, sliding the thin door shut behind him. Three of the curtains are slung wide open, while the other is shut tightly to block any light from getting into the bed. Calum raps his knuckles on the wooden frame that separates his bed from Ashton's.

"Fuck off," Ashton huffs, voice small and muffled.

"It's me," Calum says. There's a short pause, and then the curtain flings back to reveal Ashton, wrapped in his heavy duvet, hair laying flat against his pillow like a tiny lion's mane. He mutters something angrily and starts shifting until his back hits the wall and Calum has plenty of room to crawl inside the little bunk.

He lays in front of Ashton on his back and closes the curtain behind him. Like Michael and Luke won't find them.

"What do you want, Cal?" Ashton asks softly.

"To talk, maybe cuddle a little," Calum shrugs and rolls over so he's face to face with Ashton. Their noses brush slightly, making Ashton jerk his head away, accidentally slamming it into the wall behind him. Calum frowns and reaches forward to make sure he's okay, only to receive a panicked look from Ashton.

"You're having a no cuddle day, huh?" He asks carefully, rolling over onto his back again. Ashton gets into moods sometimes, where the slightest touch makes him cringe. Those days usually include him laying in Calum's bed, making sure to keep space between them, and scrolling through his phone or napping. Its hard when they're touring though, because he can't just hide out in Calum's duvet all day. Calum tries to protect him from people brushing against him or casually touching him, but it usually just ends in a small panic attack and a few tears.

Ashton nods carefully, shifting so the back of his head isn't pressed against the wall anymore. "'M sorry, Cal. I want to cuddle, I just can't."

"It's okay," Calum assures him. "Maybe tomorrow."

Ashton nods a little and fidgets, rubbing his fingers together and then chewing on his fingernails. "Yeah. Maybe."

Calum doesn't mind the touch repulsed days, because it allows him to feel bigger for once. They make him feel like he's the one protecting Ashton, not the other way around.

They're both quiet for a while, listening to Michael and Luke's muffled voices from the front of the bus. Finally, Ashton says, "What'd you want to talk about?"

"Oh, right," Calum turns slightly, just moving his head to the side to face Ashton, who automatically flinches and moves his head back again. "I think you should give Luke a chance. He's really sorry to what he said, you know."

"Well, good for him," Ashton replies dryly. Calum can't believe he's this bitter.

"Ashy, I'm giving Michael another chance," he says carefully. "He apologized, so I'm giving him another chance. Because I am a good fucking person, and I'm doing this out of the goodness of my giant heart."

Ashton rolls his eyes, but doesn't respond. Instead, he looks over Calum's face slowly, examining all of his features like he's trying to memorize them. There's a tiny smile on his pale lips and a small flush to his cheeks.

"You're not putting up with any of Michael's shit, are you?" He asks finally.

"Absolutely not," Calum assures him. "He's going to have to work if he wants this hot ass."

Ashton laughs a little and shifts so he can bury his face in the pillow they're sharing. "Oh my god, Calum," he waits until his giggles have died down to speak again."I just want to make sure that he's not being rude and you're just taking it."

"Absolutely fucking not," Calum says again.

Ashton pulls his face out of the pillow and glances over at him fondly, lips still stretched into a snike and eyes still sparkling. "Love you, Cally," he says softly.

Calum grins at him and shifts, accidentally knocking their knees together. Ashton's smile instantly disappears. He grits his teeth together and squeezed his eyes shut, jerking his legs away immediately. They hit the wall with a few muffled thuds, while Ashton tenses up completely. His entire body is rigid and taught, stretching and stilling awkwardly.

It's dead silent for a few seconds, and then Ashton let's out a heavy breath and opens one eye experimentally.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, opening the other eye and looking at Calum like he's going to cry.

"It's okay," Calum assures him. "Bus bunks weren't meant to not touch."

"I know, just-" he huffs in frustration, reaching go to tug on his hair. Even that makes his teeth press together again, tendons in his neck sticking out with the force of it. "Why am I like this? Why does this fucking happen to me? Its just touching, its not even sexual!"

"Ash, its okay," Calum says softly. "I promise, there's nothing wrong with you. You're fine, babe, you just don't like being touched sometimes. I don't like being a boy sometimes, but it's something I live with."

"Its different," Ashton argues. "You can hide when you want to be a girl, I can't hide when I don't want to be touched. It's just- I hate it."

Calum's quiet for a second, because Ashton's right. There isn't any way to hide the days he doesn't want to be touched. Michael and Luke just say he's on his period, because he usually doesn't leave Calum's room. They don't notice the way Ashton cringes when someone brushes against him. But then again, they're not really looking like Calum is.

Calum flicks his tongue over his bottom lip and says, "Maybe you should tell Michael and Luke? So they understand that you're not just being a little bitch? No offense."

"I don't want to," Ashton mutters, bringing heavy blanket up to his mouth to muffle his words. He glares at Calum and ducks down further into the dark red duvet, practically curling in on himself.

"Why not?" Calum prompts.

Ashton narrows his eyes even more. "Luke'll just make fun of me and tell me it's all in my head and Michael always agrees with him."

Calum wants to say something about how Luke's not like that, but he can't. Luke is turning out like that, he doesn't understand any other sexuality besides his own. Luke knows he just likes boys, there's no in between, he didn't have to search the internet for a term that made him feel less fucked up. Luke never had to go through a phase where he didn't think there was an actually proper term that fit him.

Calum hates him for that a little.

Instead, Calum says, "They need to know, Ashy."

"Calum," Ashton stresses. "I can't."

"Yes you can," Calum says simply.

Ashton stares at him, probably waiting for a pep talk or something else that Calum's not offering up. After a few, tense seconds, Ashton whispers, "Promise they won't be mean about it?"

"Yeah, promise," Calum nods. But he's really not fucking sure, to be honest. Luke is oblivious to when people are hurting, he usually just blurts out whatever comes to his mind.

"Fine," Ashton mumbles. Calum beams at him. He hops out of the bunk, then drags Ashton down but pulling on the blanket he's wrapped in. Ashton scowls, but eventually gives into Calum's prodding and shuffles out into the front of the bus.

Michael and Luke are still at the table, flinging fruit loops at each other from opposite sides of the little booth. They both look up and smile at Ashton, who's still wrapped in his blanket and glaring at them. Ashton stops in front of them, glares at his toes, and jerks his arm back to elbow Calum in the stomach.

"Oof!" Calum huffs, folding over a little and grabbing his stomach.

"What do you want me to say?" Ashton mutters.

"Just tell them," Calum's still a little breathless. Michael sends him a sympathetic look but doesn't do anything to help or comfort them.

"Don't fucking touch me, I'll claw your eyes out and shove them down your throat," Ashton flicks his eyes up to glare at the pair in front of him.

"Lovely," Michael responds dryly. "Thanks for the formal statement."

"Likewise," Ashton responds.

And that's that, really. Ashton crawls back into his bunk and Calum expands a little on Ashton's announcement. Luke twitches a little, probably remembering the way he'd nudged Ashton not twenty minutes prior, but accepts it completely. Michael shrugs and says, "Its not like he touches me, anyway. God forbid a pan and an ace get along."

°°°°

Luke crawls onto the couch with Calum as soon as Michael and Ashton fall asleep last night. He rests his head on Calum's shoulder, let's out a shuddery breath, and says, "What did Michael mean before?"

"When?" Calum asks, because Michael generally spews about thirty pounds of complete bullshit everyday.

"When he said a pan and an ace couldn't get along," Luke clarifies.

Calum shrugs, forgetting Luke's still leaning on him and jostling his head around on accident. "They're polar opposites. Michael likes everyone and Ashton likes no one. They're basically opposite ends of the spectrum."

"So he doesn't like Ashton?" Luke says quietly, sounding small and vulnerable.

"Hypothetically," Calum frowns. "I mean, they should be butting heads and arguing all the time, which they sort of are, but they still love each other."

"Are you sure?" Luke asks. Calum kind of wants to wrap him in seven blankets and pet his hair.

"Yeah, Lukey," Calum promises. "Its not like I just suddenly started hating you when you came out. It's dumb to hate someone for their sexuality, it's not like who they like to kiss defines them as a person."

Luke's silent for a few seconds, body tensing completely and Calum knows he touched a nerve. He can't tell from what though, because Luke's entire family still loves him and, as far as Calum knows, there wasn't a problem with Luke coming out.

"Cal, what's demiromantic mean?" He says finally.

Calum let's out a tiny sigh, hoping that this was what Luke was stressing about. "Romantic attraction to someone you have a close bond with."

"Well, that makes sense," Luke grins without hesitation and starts to loosen up again. "Michael has wooed the majority of his friends so far, hasn't he?"

"Two out of three isn't bad," Calum agrees, reaching up to run his hand across Luke's head.

And suddenly Calum realizes, he and Luke are okay.

((My piercing really hurts wHY IS IT PINCHING ITS NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT

Anyway, ASHTON'S TOUCHING REPULSED THING HAS ABSLOUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH HIS ASEXUALITY. HE IS NOT A SEX REPULSED ASEXUAL. HE JUST HAS A WEIRD NO TOUCHING RULE EVERY SO OFTEN, OKAY????

(Irrelevant but I learned one of my friends is ace today and it was really hard for me not to yell "AYYYYYYEEEEEEE MY BROTHA we are the 1% did u know that we have to get married sorry" (she's really cute bYE))

-Mel))