CHAPTER THIRTEEN

JAIRO'S POV

"Alam mo ba, anak? I used to be one of those charming basketball players in my highschool days," kwento ni Dad na nagpakuha ng atensyon ko.

I grinned playfully at him. "Talaga ba, Dad?" I made sure that the tone I used sounded like he said something unbelievable.

He flatly looked at me. "Seryoso nga ako. At dahil sa sobrang kagwapuhan ko noon ay nagkagusto sa akin ang mommy mo."

Nakita ko naman si Mommy na sumama ang mukha saka binatukan si Daddy. "Nagkagusto ka riyan. I hated you to the bone, Kerby," naiiritang sabi ni Mom.

I laughed when Dad pouted like a kid. "Okay, fine. Hindi ka kaagad nagkagusto pero kinalaunan naman ay nagustuhan mo rin naman ako ha?"

Mas lalong sumama ang mukha ni Mom. "Ikaw, kung ano-anong pinagk-kwento mo riyan kay Jairo. He might believe your words, Kerby."

Muli akong natawa sa kanila. "Believe me, son. I was one of the most popular guys in high school and your mom was like a shy, nerd-type girl. Syempre I wanted her to notice me in a very cool way."

"You made her like you in a cool way?" I repeated and Dad nodded. I became curious. "How?"

My dad grinned. "I made sure to bother her everyday life," he proudly said, which received another not-so-hard smack on the back of his head from Mom.

"Yeah, right. You pestered me during my school days. A freaking campus bully." Napansin ko si Mom na nakaupo na sa single sofa na katabi ng kay Dad at nakikinig na sa kwento.

Napailing na lang ako habang naka-ngiti. "But you were the lady who made me the best version of myself. Hindi na ako na-guidance o nasasangkot sa gulo nang dahil sayo. Because you actually didn't want a bad boy in your life."

Mom sighed before smiling softly while looking at Dad. "The bad boy you or this man in front of me, I'd still be in love with you."

Agad umiwas ng tingin si Dad kay mom at tumingin sa akin. "R-Remember, son. D-Don't let your future lady see your red beet face. It's not cool," sabi ni Dad habang namumula. Pareho naman kaming natawa ni Mom.

My future lady would make me the best version of myself... and well... make me blush like how Mom made Dad blush.

Hmm... I'm excited to meet her.

Another year began and finally, I'm entering a new phase called high school.

I was in the middle of strolling on the campus, clearly getting to know the paths and rooms when someone caught my eye. I walked a little more back to be able to have sight of her again.

And there she was... silently walking alone towards the university's library.

I don't know why but I felt my feet moving on their own, walking towards the library.

Once I entered, I saw her talking to who seemed to be the librarian. They were discussing something and she cutely smiled and nodded.

Then again, I don't know why but I saw everything else turn to blur except for that girl.

Hindi ko namalayang nakatitig ako sa kanya kung wala pang yumugyog ng balikat ko. It was Sean. He was saying something but I couldn't hear him.

Ang tangi ko lang naririnig ay ang mabilis na tibok ng puso ko habang nakatingin pa rin sa babaeng iyon.

Days passed, and I can't seem to forget her face so I ended up visiting the library every single time I got a chance.

And I wasn't even settled with just looking at her. I started wanting her to look at me too or at least share a conversation or two.

So I found myself borrowing books just to be in front of her. But then... it still wasn't enough. Napatigil tuloy ako sa panghihiram dahil na-exceed ko na yung limitation.

At kahit sumobra na ako ay ni isang tapon ng tingin o salita mula sa kanya ay wala akong napala.

But I did get her name. It was Maria Kristine Abella. Cute, just like her.

Nang hindi ko pa rin makuha ang atensyon niya ay saka ko naalala ang kwento noon ni Dad about him pestering Mom just to get her attention.

I tried doing that... but unfortunately, not with her. Para kasing napaka-seryoso niya sa buhay. Parang hindi mo siya pwedeng guluhin since she looked so perfect.

So I ended up doing trouble or two, hoping she would notice me. But still no.

Hanggang sa medyo napagod na ako kaya tumigil na ako sa paggagawa ng kalokohan para sa atensyon niya. I then did some trouble simply because... I'm already used to it.

Hanggang sa... sa isang araw... another phase... college... she... she shouted and walked towards me.

I was like, "F*cking finally! You're finally looking at me!"

I was so d*mn happy, only to realize that I was actually in a relationship with Blaire.

Kaya naman sa hindi ko malamang bagay ay para bang isang biyaya na inapakan ni Blaire ang pride ko kaya napagdesisyunan kong tapusin na lang kami at nang mapunta na kay Kristine ang buong atensyon ko.

I mean... Blaire is beautiful, no doubt. A guy would adore her in an instant... but... that guy isn't me, since... I adored Kristine right from the start.

So when I finally got that moment, I told myself, "This is it! Promise me. Do everything you can to keep her eyes on you and only you. You can do this, Jairo."

"Everybody, please put your hands together for our last performer, Jairo Guevarra!" sigaw ng emcee. That was my cue to go out and stand on the stage.

"Go, Jairo!"

"We love you, Jairo!"

"Iyo lang ako, Guevarra!" nakita at narinig ko pang sigaw ni JP na umani ng mangilan-ngilang tawa.

I heard people cheering but for the second time, my ears blocked them out. Sa sobrang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko, iyon tuloy ang naririnig ko.

I could still clearly remember when was the first time that happened... the first time I saw her smile.

I sat on the chair prepared for me, holding my guitar and fixing the microphone in front of me.

Okay... Here I go.

Humarap na ako sa mga audience pero isang tao lang ang hinahanap ko. Finally, I found her staring at me. Mas bumilis pa ata ang pagtibok ng puso ko. Hindi ko inalis ang tingin ko sa kanya at kahit siya ay hindi umiwas. With that, I began strumming. I believe that this song has the right words I would want to tell her.

I'm hoping that through this song you'll get my message.

I made sure to keep my eyes staring into hers. I want her to know that this performance is for her.

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting

It couldn't be that we have been this way before

Nakatitig pa rin ako sa kanya at ganon din siya.

I know you don't think that I am trying

I know you're wearing thin down to the core

Hindi ko makayanang ngumiti kahit na gusto ko.

But hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you

Over again

Don't make me change my mind

I ended up not following what Blaire asked me to do. What I wanted to do.

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

I still can't risk showing her what I truly feel.

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

You're impossible to find

I don't want her to be part of my troubled life anymore. I want her to be safe.

Maria Kristine Abella, I have loved you from the start and I'm willing to fall for you over and over again.

I continued singing until the song ended. Nakatitig pa rin siya sa akin at ako na ang nag-iwas ng tingin sa kanya.

I smiled at the audience and headed my way off the stage, without doing what I planned, without confessing to her in front of this crowd, and once again, failing on having her.

I was in the middle of the staircase when I suddenly halted. No, Jairo! You have a promise to yourself.

If you badly want her, then do everything you can to have her.

Pinaraya ka na ng tuluyan ni Blaire. It's now your move.

Do it.

I ended up finding myself climbing up the stairs again. Narinig ko ang bulungan ng mga tao dahil nagsasalita pala kasalukuyan ang emcee at sakto siyang nagpapaalam sa lahat.

I walked towards the emcee. "C-Can I borrow your microphone? Saglit lang naman," kinakabahan kong paalam sa kanya.

Naguguluhan din itong tumingin sa akin bago tumango at ibinigay sa akin ang mic bago naglakad papunta sa likuran ko.

"Hi," pagkuha ko ng atensyon ng mga tao—pagkuha ko ng atensyon niya. I swear! My hands are sweating as f*ck and my heart beating so fast when I saw her walking away so I had to talk fast.

Buti na lang ay huminto siya saka tumingin sa akin. Mas lalo pa ata akong nagpawis pero hindi ko hinayaang maputol pa muli ang titigan naming dalawa.

"I... I have something to say. Some... something I badly wanted to say ever since I was in grade seven." I took a deep breath. "I... I cherish this woman so much... but I ended up hurting her." I sadly smiled. "I crushed her so badly, I don't even know if she'll ever forgive me. I mean... as far as I can see, imposible talagang patawarin niya ako because like what my dear cousin said, hurting her was definitely a sh*tty move."

I saw and heard Ayel squealing when she heard my last line. Nakita ko ring niyugyog niya ang braso ni Kristine na nakatitig lang sa akin. This is it, Jai. Say it.

"First of all, since I don't want you to hate her nor talk sh*t about her, Blaire and I broke up." I searched for Blaire in the crowd and quickly saw her smiling at me. "Second, I still want to say thank you to her because she's amazing and thoughtful. I hope you'll find the right man for you."

Gusto ko pa ring maramdaman ni Blaire na pinapahalagahan ko ang nararamdaman niya at hindi lang basta-bastang binabalewala.

Hinanap ko ulit si Kristine na nahuli kong nakatitig pa rin sa akin. "And lastly, I want to do what I have always wanted to do. I hope you heard the song well and understood the lyrics because it's for you. Like the song, I'll always fall for you over and over again. So, please... Maria Kristine Abella, please forgive me and let me start all over again. I'll work hard to gain your trust again before I ask you to let me court you again, and more properly this time."