"We fight every night for something
When the sun sets we're both the same
Half in the shadows
Half burned in flames"

--2016--

   "So you like cats ?"

  "Sam..."

  When I wake up, I'm in the back of a truck and —unsurprisingly— still handcuffed. Sam Wilson is sitting next to me and Rogers is in front of us, next to the Cat-Man.

  "What ? Dude shows up dressed like a cat and you don't wanna know more ?"

  I grunt. My head hurts but what this man did to my James pisses me off even more.

  "I sure as hell wanna know who he thinks he is," I almost growl.

  Steve gives me a quick look before he looks back to him. "Your suit. It's vibranium ?"

  "The Black Panther has been the protector of Wakanda for generations. The mantle passed from warrior to warrior. And now because your friend murdered my father, I also wear the mantle of king. So I ask you, as both warrior and king, how long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me ?"

  "He didn't do it, you useless cat. I swear to god if you touch one single streak of hair of his, I'll-"

  "Y/n, stop it."

  "Hell no. I wanna know where James is and...where the hell is my cat ?"

  "They're safe," Steve says as he clenches his jaw. Something in his attitude tells me he doesn't believe his own words and that scares the shit out of me. The rest of the ride is silent and I have to stop myself from throwing every swear word I know in both English and Russian to that wannabe panther or whatever. When we're finally allowed to get out of the car, I notice I'm the only one wearing handcuffs. Great. Steve looks to his right and the change in his eyes makes me look in the same direction. Here he is, locked in a glass cage, strapped down to a chair. It reminds me painfully of his Winter Soldier days. This looks exactly like the times he was about to be activated. His look crosses mine and I desperately want to run to him. We both know it wouldn't help anyone and he looks down at his feet. Steve walks to a bunch of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents.

  "What's gonna happen ?"

  "Same thing that'll happen to you," answers a man in a grey suit. "Psychological evaluation and extradition."

  "Then why is he locked up like this ?" I ask angrily.

  "Safety measure." He nods to the two men standing next to him and each of them take one of my arms. I immediately fight back.

  "Leave her alone," Steve says.

  "This is Everett Ross, deputy task force commander," says a blonde woman, ignoring what we said.

  "What about a lawyer ?" Steve asks.

  Ross lets out a mocking laugh. "Lawyer. This is funny. Suit and weapons were placed in lock up. We'll write you a receipt."

  "I better not look out the window and see anybody flying around in that," Sam says as we're told to follow Ross.

  "Wait. I'm not leaving here without James."

  "Y/n, c'mon..."

  "No, you're right," Ross adds. "You're not leaving at all." The men who were holding me before reprise their take on my arms and drag me to a nearby cell, similar to James'.

  "Let her come with us, Ross," Steve asks not so kindly.

  "You wanna be the next one to be locked up ?"

  He sighs and I let out an angry shout. Next thing I know, I'm locked up exactly like James. Thankfully they leave my cell next to his and the last thing we see from Steve is him looking back at us as the door dramatically closes on him. God, I hate my life. I turn my head towards James and smile weakly.

  "We're gonna get out of this, alright ?"

  He just smiles and doesn't answer. It's gonna be a very long day. And it is. They put us both in a secured room (as if the cells weren't enough) and tell us we're gonna be evaluated. Like we need that. Can't you already see we're messed up ? Their stupid psychologist walks in, ready to ask questions and take notes.

  "Hello Mister Barnes." Okay so once again, they're not acknowledging my existence. Is it part of my evaluation ? "I've been sent by the United Nations to evaluate you. Do you mind if I sit ?"

  James leans his head against the head rest and I can see how tired he is, both mentally and physically.

  "Your first name is James ?" James doesn't answer. "I'm not here to judge you. I'm just here to ask you a few questions. Do you know where you are, James ?" No answer. "I can't help you if you don't talk to me."

  "Can't you see he's tired ?" I realise too late that I nearly screamed that. I can't help it. I wish they would just...stop. Stop putting him through all of this. How is this fair ?

  "Miss y/l/n, I'll ask you to remain quiet."

  "Shut up ! He doesn't wanna talk, let him rest !"

  "My name is Bucky." I look at James again. W-what did he just say ? Even the psychologist seems surprised. Actually, I can't tell if he's surprised or amused. Something just feels...off.

  "Tell me, Bucky, you've seen a deal, haven't you ?"

  "Yeah, no kidding," I mutter.

  "I'm not talking to you."

  The guy grips harder on his pen for a second. I frown and look to the camera in front of me. Is someone watching this ? Am I the only one who thinks he's suspicious ? I try to analyse my surroundings more carefully than before, the Russian spy in me slowly resurfacing. Sure, the glass should be easy to break but I'd have to free my hands and they're strongly attached by metal straps. I move my wrists a little to test their solidity. Hm. It doesn't look impossible to me.

  "I don't wanna talk about it." I can see James- I mean, Bucky- is getting angrier as the questioning goes further. As I try to free myself discreetly, I can't help but think about his answer. Doesn't he...James is his name, right ? That's how I always called him. Doesn't he want to hear that name again ? Maybe that's why he seemed so weird lately.

  "You feel that...if you open your mouth, the horrors might never stop. Don't worry. We only have to talk about one."

  What the hell is he doing ? That's not an evaluation. To me, it looks a lot like pure provocation. It's like he wants him to snap. That's when I get my chance : everything goes dark and I pull as hard as I can to break my bonds. I can feel them giving in and I let out a growl as I finally break them. I punch a hole through the glass, cutting my hands in several places. I can feel the blood on my arm but that's the last thing I care about. I have to find Bucky.

  "What the hell was this ?" He asks. He probably heard the glass shattering. It looks like the guy in the chair didn't hear it.

  "Why don't we discuss your home ? Not Romania. Certainly not Brooklyn, no. I mean...your real home." He takes out a notebook with a star on its cover and it turns out he's behind a huge glass as well. A glass too hard for me to break. I break James' glass and the psychologist doesn't even seem to care.

  "What are you doing ?" James asks.

  "Saving your ass. C'mon, you can break those," I say as I point to his wrists. But the fake psychologist speaks and it's not English anymore. It's Russian. Russian words I know too well.

  "желаниe. pжавый."

  "Stop," Bucky whispers.

  "семнадцать."

  "Stop," he says louder as he clenches is metal fist.

  "No, no, stay with me James," I whisper in his ears. "Do you hear me ?"

  "I don't..."

  "C'mon, you can fight this. Newspapers. Rogers. Howling commando."

  "рассвет."

  Bucky screams and my survival instinct tells me to go away and yet I stay. As I always will.

  "You can do this. Shield."

  "Печь. Девять. Доброкачественные. Возвращение домой."

  "Train. Rogers."

  He lets out another screams and breaks all of his bonds, throwing me against the wall in his rage. I know he didn't do it on purpose but shit, that hurts. My head is dizzy and I can't see anything. I'm not sure if it's because it's dark of if he threw me so hard against that wall that I'm about to pass out.

  "грузовой вагон." This is the last word. The last one who makes James stop moving. I'm still on the ground, waiting for whatever's next. I'm petrified. I was so close... All I had to say was Steve. But now I'd have to start all over again and I'm not sure it would work. Whoever he is, that guy wouldn't let me finish. Once he made sure James was no longer conscious and the Winter Soldier was under his control, he asked what he truly wanted.

  "Mission report, December 16, 1991."

  Oh no. Please no. I don't wanna hear this. It was already painful enough just knowing what we'd done to them. We hear footsteps. I know we all did because we stopped moving right away. The guy gives a few orders and punches me in the face as a warning. "You speak, you die." James hides behind a door and the other dude lies on the floor.

  "Help, help me..."

  As soon as I recognised that characteristic blond hair of his...

  "Steve, don't..."

  Steve and Sam are there, about to fall for that trap and I can't even finish : I spit some blood on the floor. Steve lifts the guy up and pins him against the wall.

  "Who are you ? What do you want ?"

  "To see an empire fall."

  Bucky comes out of hiding and quickly throws Sam out of the way before fighting Steve. They get out of the room and when I hear a loud metallic bang, I don't even wanna know who fell. Instead, I get up. It's painful and I have a hard time getting back on my feet but I still try to help Sam do the same. Everything looks blurry.  We notice that fake psychologist looking in the elevator cage and when he sees us standing, he tries to run away. We run after him and follow him out. Everyone seems to be rushing out of the building at the exact same time and when we find his jacket on the ground, we both know we failed.

  "Damn it."

  I pat Sam's shoulder.

  "What do we do know ?" I ask. He seems surprised by my question. "You can go back inside. I- I can't. They'll try to kill me too. Go ahead."

  "You're not leaving again, are you ?"

  "N-no."

  "Y/n... Steve warned me you'd do exactly that. You're coming with me."

  I sigh and look up to the sky and- shit.

  "Sam ?"

  "What ?"

  I point at the helicopter trying to take off from the building we just exited.

  "Is that...?"

  "Yep."

  "Is Steve really..."

  "Holding back a helicopter ? Yep. I bet Bucky's in it. We'd better check this out."

  "We can't be up there that fast."

  "Watch me."

  Of course he doesn't follow me. I shouldn't be surprised but I tend to forget not everyone is enhanced like James, Steve and I. When I get to that roof, I see Steve managed to stop the helicopter, but that doesn't mean he stopped the Winter Soldier. Actually, I can see Jame's arms holding Steve's neck through the window.

  "James, stop !"

  I run to them but it's too late. The helicopter falls down to the water, brining James and Steve along. No. I can't let that happen. I don't think twice and jump after them. The water hits me like a bullet and I need a few seconds to focus on my goal again. I see James in the helicopter and swim to him as fast as I can. I pull on his shirt to get him out after I broke what was left of the windshield. I can't quite lift him up and my head gets dizzy when I feel another hand grab me by the collar. Steve and I emerge out of the water, both holding on to James. I look at him and I can see in his eyes he's as scared as I am. We have no idea who's gonna wake up : James or the Winter Soldier ?