C H A P T E R
T H I R T Y

         Walking into work Ahmad held the same dull and lifeless look he's been sporting around for the past two months and said no words to anybody as he made his way to his office.

Marcus, Shaun and Dave all shared a look towards each other and shook their heads in defeat.

He was slowly reverting back to his old self and everyone who knew him before the change had took notice to it. He wasn't laughing much anymore, he barely spoke or smiled and his eyes constantly held a look of sadness in them.

He was very short with his words since anytime he talked he constantly got choked up and would be on the verge of tears and breaking down. So to save himself he just kept his communication to a miniumn. Only spoke when needed to speak and that was it.

The past two months for Ahmad have been hell mentally and emotionally, he couldn't sleep at night without having dreams and thoughts of Cali and Reggie. Most of his nights where spent with him crying and sulking in pain and he hated that he was really reverting back to the one person he never wanted to face again.

He was honestly ashamed that the person who helped him become a better person and healed his broken spirit was the same one to do him dirty.

Words really couldn't express the hurt he was feeling at the moment and instead of opening up about them he bottled them up.

Eating was almost nonexistent if it weren't for the times when his mama would pop up at his new apartment with food and force him to eat. She and everybody else knew that if they just left it up to him he would probably accidentally on purpose starve himself.

They all knew he was hurting and knew he dealt with pain differently from others, and most of em just wished they could take the pain he was feeling away so he could get back to his old self.

The only time anyone would see him genuinely smile was whenever he was around his kids and spending time with them since they kept him going and made his fucked up life better. He was now only living for them and as the days passed he really couldn't see himself getting back with Cali after this.

He loved her no doubt in his mind, but that trust he had towards her was gone and for her to sleep with Reggie knowing he was basically an enemy towards Ahmad he couldn't respect that or even try to understand why she did that.

So he was done with everything.

His biggest issue was that they couldn't even make it a year together as a married couple and he felt that was a major sign that Cali just may not be the woman for him. And although it hurts him to think this way since he loves her more than words and emotions can express, he knew thinking logically it was all a sign.

Entering his office he wasn't shocked when he seen Travis, Meech and Rakim in his office laid on his floor and couch. It was officially summer and they had all started working for Ahmad basically being everybody's little assistants.

They kept the shop in order, ran errands for them, entertained the customers while they would wait to be seen for a tattoo and brought a little more excitement to the shop. It was a quick easy way for them to get money, and Ahmad was all for helping young black men stay on the right track.

Slapping hands with all of them, he walked behind his desk sitting the bag of food ontop of it before he began pulling out breakfast sandwiches to hand to them.

"I ain't know what y'all wanted to drink so I got apple juice, that's cool?" He questioned but immediately started clearing his throat from how raspy his voice was.

"You know my fat ass ain't complainin', thanks man." Rakim joked as he jumped up from the floor and took his food while Meech and Travis did the same.

"Can you take this bag and hand it to Marcus so he can pass out they breakfast?" He questioned looking towards Meech.

Getting up he did as he wanted and walked out.

Looking over towards Rakim, he motioned for him to come here. "I got a client coming in at 9:30, can you make sure my section is cleaned and in order? When you finish you can just chill and watch tv in there until he arrives."

When he left out Ahmad turned his focus towards Travis and leaned forward in his seat. "So what you gotta talk to me about?"

Late last night Travis had texted Ahmad saying he really needed to speak with him about something important tomorrow at work and all morning that had been on Ahmad's mind.

Sitting his food down, he sighed. "You know how I told you me and Winter lost our virginities together about two months ago and since then sex between us happens often." He started off, before clearing his throat. "Well, recently Winter hasn't started her cycle and she's three weeks late so she thinks she could possibly be pregnant and I'm freaking out."

Standing up, Travis began pacing the floor. "I did everything you guys told me to do, I wore condoms each time we had sex, I wasn't being sloppy or anything when it came to us doing it. I don't know what I'ma do, I'm only sixteen and she's fifteen we aren't ready to be parents." He stressed. "What I'ma do Ahmad?"

Pointing to the couch Ahmad made him sit down before he stood up himself.

Taking a seat at the edge of his desk, he folded his arms over his chest and shook his head. "Whatchu first gon' do is calm down and get your mind right. You don't even know if she pregnant or not and already freaking out and if she is pregnant you gon' man up and be a father. We all told you guys what comes with sex and that's a list of consequences that a lot of us aren't ready to face. You felt you was grown enough to have sex and handle what can come with it so now you need to feel grown enough to be a father if she is pregnant."

"You know me, the boys and yo peoples gon' look out for you and make sure you, Winter and that child gon' be straight but its time to face the music son. You two need to find out if she is pregnant and when y'all do call me immediately and we'll go from there."

Travis nodded, "I know, its just I'm scared to be honest."

"That's understandable who wouldn't be? I was twenty-six when Cali was pregnant with Armoni and I was scared out of my mind but I knew I didn't have time to be living in fear though. I had a child on the way and I knew I had to get on my grown man shit and set a good example for her and that's what you gotta do. So take today off and go figure out what you and Winter got going on so we can get to the bottom of this."

Standing up Travis nodded, "Yessir, thank you for always knowing exactly what to say. I really appreciate it."

Slapping hands and bringing him in for a hug, Ahmad kissed the top of his head before sending him on his way.

Reaching on his desk to grab his food, he paused when he realized he was still wearing his wedding ban. Raising his hand up apart of him wanted to take it off and toss it out the window, but then another part of him just couldn't build the courage to take it off since that would set it in stone that his marriage was really over.

Leaving out of his office, he flipped the light switch off and took a deep breath to mentally prepare himself for today and his client.

Parking his car in the driveway, Ahmad didn't bother shutting off his car since he was only gonna be there a minute to get his kids and go.

Getting out the car he walked up towards the front door and knocked on it twice but stepped back when the door was swung open and he was met with Cali who was carrying a crying Armoni in her arms. "Your child here has been in a moody mood all day, the daycare had called me three times today explaining to me how she has been acting out and I honestly don't know what is wrong with her Ahmad." She explained as she stepped to the side and let him in.

Taking Armoni from her arms Armoni immediately stopped crying when she came face to face with her daddy. Hugging him tightly, she softly sniffled and laid her head on his shoulder feeling all safe and warm. "What's wrong witchu mook? Why you been acting out and crying so much?"

Using the back of her hand she wiped her tears and sniffled alittle trying to get words together. "I-I-I just wan' ta' be with you."

Smiling, Ahmad wrapped his arms around her and kissed her on the cheeks and all over her face to make her laugh and it worked like always.

Cali stood back and watched in awe at their moment but of course held guilt in her heart since it was her fault he wasn't around as much as the kids wanted him to be.

He would come over and get them almost every day and they spent the weekends with him but of course it was still a transition since they were used to seeing him all the time and whenever they wanted too.

Once Ahmad got her to calm down, he looked back over at Cali and stared at her growing belly and smiled alittle. "You feeling okay? Everything good with her in there?"

Placing her hand over her stomach she nodded and cleared her throat. "Yeah, we're good. Don't forget we have another check up coming next week om Tuesday at noon."

He nodded as he began walking away from her since he could never be around her too long now. "I'll be there."

Walking down the hall, he pushed opened the door to his sons rooms to see them on the floor coloring not even realizing he was standing there.

"Dang so this how y'all do me now? Just ignore my entire presence?" He asked and they both immediately shot up once they saw and heard him speaking.

Hugging his legs Marquette looked up at him with those big brown eyes he inherited from Cali and pouted. "You staying with us right?"

"Y'all actually coming with me and I got a whole lot planned for us this weekend. You guys ready?" He asked but only Adrian and Armoni nodded, Marquette just simply let go of his leg and walked over to his bed with a pout on his face.

Putting Armoni down he motioned for Adrian and her to go find their mama and have her get them dressed.

Closing the door behind him he walked over and took a seat beside his oldest boy. "You alright?"

Shaking his head no, he scooted closer and laid his head on his shoulder. "Did I break up the family because I didn't tell what really happened at Reggie's house? Mommy is always crying and you're never around anymore and I just feel like it's all my fault and I'm sorry if it is." He sniffled.

Frowning at the fact that Marquette was really blaming himself for the split in their family, he pulled him onto his lap and held him in his arms. "You are not the blame for what is going on, mommy is not crying because she's sad or upset at you and I'm not around because I don't want to be around you guys. You three are my life and I love spending every moment with you guys."

"Then why won't you come home?"

Letting out a sigh, he knew he wouldn't understand as to why he couldn't come home. "You're too young to understand now, but I'll be back soon okay? Me and mommy just gotta figure somethings out but know that it has nothing to do with you or your siblings okay? I'm always just a phone call away and whenever you need me you know I'll be there right?"

He nodded, "Yessir."

"Alright, so now is you ready to go have the most fun this weekend with me and you brother and sister?"

Nodding his head excitedly, he hopped up and ran to grab his bag that was already packed and ready.

When Ahmad went to leave out of the room to go and check on his other kids, Marquette stopped him by grabbing his arm. "Hm?"

Motioning for him to come down closer as if he wanted to tell him a secret, Ahmad did as he wanted and waited. "It was aunt Melissa who did it and My daddy just watched. I wanted to say something but I was scared, and I told Blessing not to tell her daddy either since I didn't want to get in trouble so can you promise not to tell mommy?"

Ahmad relunctantly nodded his head shocked at what he just found out.

When Marquette pulled away from Ahmad's ear and walked out, Ahmad stayed there stunned at what he just said. Getting up and walking out he went right into him and Cali's bedroom to see her sitting on the bed brushing up Armoni's hair into two ponytails.

"We need to talk like now."

Looking up from the tone of urgency in his voice, she quickly finished doing Armoni's hair then motioned for them all to go towards the front and watch tv.

Closing their door behind her once they all left out, she put all her focus onto her husband wondering what he had to say.

"Marquette just told me that it was his Aunt Melissa that beat him and he said Reggie just watched the shit happen! Who is this Melissa bitch? That nigga got a sister or something?" He asked already feeling his anger rise.

He finally got the information he needed and to know that Reggie knew this whole time about the mistreatment his own biological son was dealing with pissed him off even more and made him hate that nigga even more. Now all he needed to find out was who tha fuck this Melissa bitch was.

Scratching her head Cali slowly nodded once she started remembering. "Yeah, but I haven't seen that girl or even heard her name in years. She was younger than Reggie and was never really around much, but I do remember she was at the birth of Marquette and I think I have a picture in his photo album book of Reggie and his family taking pictures with Marquette after he was born."

Going into their closet she pulled down a box that held all the memories with each of her kids. It was full of pictures, pacifiers, and many more things but all Cali wanted to find was Marquette's baby book.

After searching and digging around for a while she finally found it. Sitting on the floor she flipped open the book and began flipping through pages before she landed on the one she needed to see. Scanning the pictures with her eyes to find his sister, she nodded when she spotted her standing near the back.

"This is her, I believe."

Grabbing the book from her Ahmad frowned when he saw how familiar the girl looked and after a while of just staring at the bitch that was when it hit him.

His sister was Melissa and just like that everything started to link and make sense for once.

Shaun and Alisha both set up their dining room to get ready for the arrival of his mother and father to come over for dinner. His mother has finally built the courage to face him after all these years and to actually have a sit down and talk with him face to face.

Shaun of course was nervous and had Alisha nerves just as bad but she tried to keep his nerves at bay and to reassure him thay everything would be okay tonight.

After sitting the last dish of food on the table, Alisha walked back in the kitchen to wash her hands and to change into something more comfortable.

While in the room she noticed they had mail so she began looking through it bypassing all the bills then stopped when she saw it was a letter from her sister in jail.

Rolling her eyes, she ripped the letter open and pulled it put to see what this bitch had to possibly say.

"Alisha,

I know I'm the last person you want to hear from but words can't express how sorry I am for doing what I did to you and Shaun. I live with that guilt everyday behind these walls and I just wish I could go back in time and make shit right. My life was good and I had a good man and I fucked it all up by being selfish and letting my jealousy ways get in the way. You have always loved and supported and I should have had that same energy towards you but instead I wanted all the glory and praise so I always tried to outshine you and although I can't take back what I did, I am truly sorry for everything. But I'm writing you because this is a letter good bye, I'll be back behind these walls for another three years and I can't live like this. Knowing that I caused you pain eats away at my mind and heart to where I can't sleep or eat anymore. And I know I deserve all of this for what I did but I also know I deserve to die as well. By time you get this I'll probably already be dead so I'ma just end this letter here.

Again thank you for everything and I'm sorry I wasn't a better sister to you. Have a nice life Lisha, love you."

Sitting the letter down Alisha wasn't sure on how to feel about this, she wanted to feel bad, she wanted to cry and scream out that her sister was dead but then she couldn't.

It was a fucked up position to be in and part of her felt guilty for not caring as much as she should.

Did she want her sister to die? No, but she also didn't respect rapists since she too herself was raped so she couldn't find it in her heart to feel sorry for her.

Leaving out of the room once she was dressed, she walked up to Shaun who was literally cleaning the same spot he had cleaned hours ago and turned him around so she could hug him.

Hugging her back, he slightly pulled away when he heard her sniffle and grew concerned. "What's wrong?"

"Anaya killed herself and I don't know how to feel about it and I feel bad that I lowkey feel nothing and I don't like having this kind of energy especially with me carrying the twins."

"She killed herself!? Damn."

Shaun wasn't sure what else to say either since he too wasn't exactly sure how to feel. "Okay, this what we gon' do for tonight we just gon' push this to the back of our minds and focus on this dinner then later later after my folks leave we'll talk."

Alisha nodded agreeing to that, leaning down he kissed her sweetly on the lips and rubbed his hand on her belly in a soothing motion. "It's okay to feel sad Alisha, I know you probably don't want too because of what she did but at the end of the day I know that is your sister and who honestly wants to recieve that news about their sibling."

Crying a little harder now, she just hugged him tighter letting her emotions speak for her instead.

By time his parents arrived with Nolan she was back in good spirits. Sitting at the table everybody quietly ate while Alisha fed Nolan his food since he liked to make messes and thought they were funny.

Clearing his throat, Shaun wiped the corners of his mouth and focused his eyes on his dad. "So how you been holding up pops?"

"Just taking it day by day, I'm doing better though. Still having a few issues with my kidney's but we're praying things get better."

Shaun nodded, "That's good, you know I'm here every step of the way to help."

He smiled, "I know and I appreicate that."

"Since we're on the topic of some good news, Alisha and I have some good news to share with you two as well. We found out the genders of the twins and wanted you guys to be the first ones to know."

Looking towards Alisha, she smiled warmly as her and Shaun locked hands together and faced his parents. "We're having twin girls!" She shouted excitedly scaring Nolan who began to cry from her outburst.

Smacking his teeth Shaun looked over at his son shaking his head, "Little mean ass nigga always ruining the moment, stop crying you finna be a big brother."

When Nolan rolled his eyes as if he could careless about what he was talking about, he motioned for Alisha to start back feeding him again.

"You not happy to be a big brother baby?" Alisha asked and Nolan just ignored her and pointed to his food again.

"Okay fine, we'll discuss this later during bath time. You can't ignore me forever."

Laughing, his mom found her gawking at her grandson since he was truly handsome and favored her son so much. Over the two days they had kept him she found herself falling in love with him.

It made her think back on the times when Shaun was that little before she left. She was still ashamed at the amount of time she had missed out on due to fear but she was grateful for the second chance she was granted and wasn't going to miss anything from now on.

"Congrats on the baby girls guys, I'm sure they will be just as beautiful as the first one." She complimented.

"Yeah son congrats on that, you two deserve many blessings and more to come. I'm excited to meet my granddaughters."

"Thank you, we were extremely excited to find out that we're having girls and although I wanted boys and lost the bet me and Shaun had set in stone, I'm still happy." She shrugged.

"What was the bet?"

"We both had took a guess on what we assumed the twins would be and what we wanted and whoever was right gets to name the twins so since Shaun was the winner he gets to name them so let's just all pray for cute names." She joked.

Shaun playfully rolled his eyes, "I actually already got the names and I was gonna tell you tonight but since you wanna fake on me I'll wait til they get here instead."

Looking at her fiancé long and hard she nodded, "Bet."

"Have y'all planned for a baby shower yet? I would love to help, I'm an event planner so this is right up my alley." Shaun's mom offered.

"I'm seven months almost eight months now so we decided to have a baby shower after the girls were born, so yeah you could totally help with that and help me with the wedding planning since that is coming up .. if you would like.." She explained.

"I would love too, but um I guess since we're all sharing news .. I guess its time I finally tell a secret of mine as well." His mom started up and Shaun immediately looked over at his dad to see if he knew and it was clear he did when he saw the look of frustration come across his face.

"I don't think it's a good time to tell him yet."

"Tell me what? I wanna know."

After sharing a look between one another, his mother smiled and clasped her hands together. "You have a younger brother, he's twenty-one and he lives here in Houston. I wanted to tell you about him sooner but I knew it would cause a little tension especially with me just now coming back around. But he's dying to meet you, he knows all about you and can't wait to see you."

Alisha looked around the table then immediately went back to eating when she saw Shaun drop his fork. His dad let out a deep sigh knowing his son, he knew this good dinner was about to turn sour.

Shaun laughed a little, "I have a younger brother, wow."

Wiping his mouth and clearing his throat he stood up from the table and excused himself.

"I told you not to say anything, it was too soon." His dad scolded.

"He needed to know, what was I suppose to do?"

"This was you guys first time actually having a conversation together in the same room, he has dreamed and begged for this moment and you drop a bomb like that on him. How do you think he feels knowing that you raised one son but abandoned him and left him wondering what he did wrong all his life! It was too soon babe." Standing up from his seat, he shook his head and went out to find his son and talk to him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ruin dinner. I just thought he should know about his brother."

Alisha nodded, "It's okay, he'll come around eventually .. just at this moment its too much to handle especially with everything that has been thrown his way with finding out he was the outcome from rape and whatnot and he's still coping with that so just give him time."

His mom nodded, feeling as if she was only adding stress to his life instead of making it better. She just wanted to be in her sons life and make up for what she did, but it seemed as if even with her trying she was still fucking up.

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Thanks for the love & support
- Denise 💋