Seduce and destroy.

That was the plan I formulated inside my head while driving recklessly towards the city. I grit my teeth as the annoying voice of the interviewer rang inside my head once again. Come to think of it, I never liked her. The academy looks like a prison to me. With their strict rules and nonsense policies, how will they ever breed artists as brilliant as Rigor? Art has no rules!

And why am I so angry over losing a job I didn't like?

Bumagal ang pagmamaneho ko nang mamataan ang red light. I shut my eyes for a bit, trying to silence the screaming voices inside of my head. I'm angry because in my situation, it does not matter whether I like the job or not. I have a son to feed. I need this job more than it needs me. I lost it before it even started.

Nagpupuyos pa rin ako hanggang sa makarating sa studio niya. I parked outside and climbed out of the car and went inside the building. His studio is in the third floor. Nagmamadali akong pumasok sa elevator at pinindot ang third floor. A few seconds later, the doors open.

Clearly, I'm wrong. His studio is not in the third floor. It is the third floor.

The lucky bastard occupies the entire floor for his art, and in this state, he's just here in the country temporarily? Napailing ako. I walked down the short hallway leading to the double doors. It's so plain and dull outside, no one would suspect that it's a studio. There's not even a sign.

I knock twice and didn't even bother to wait for his reply as I push the doors open. The inside is the complete opposite of the outside. I step inside the vast sun-washed room with floor-to-ceiling glass walls that overlooks the city. The blinds are down in a fraction of the walls, probably to block the harsh mid-day sunlight. There are roman pillars where division should take place, so it looks like a very big, airy atelier.

Canvases ranging from small to large lined the white walls. Some are finished, while other pieces are still waiting for their final touches. There are several long, wooden tables with buckets of paint, and a shelf that houses all the brushes and other materials. A small desk sits in the corner with an open MacBook and a small, compact speaker. Despite the abundance of liquid chemicals from the paint, his studio smells pleasant. Like sun and wild honey. At the far east of the studio is a door which I assume leads to his private office.

In the middle of it all is Rigor, hunched over a canvas thrice his size, working on his next masterpiece. He probably felt hot earlier because his top is off and hanging loosely on his broad shoulders. The muscles in his back contracts and relaxes as he splashes paint across the canvas, pouring it with his undivided attention. I winced when some of the paint splattered across the screen of his phone, carelessly thrown by his side.

I cleared my throat to get his attention, all the while wondering if he ever made a self-portrait. He'd make a sensual subject, and I know he'll make tons of money out of it, too. His fangirls wouldn't hesitate to shed money for a chance to get their hands on his brooding looks in a canvas. It will fulfill their fantasies with him, that, I am sure.

"Rigor!" I snapped when the brute didn't even bother to turn and look at me. Hindi ata ako narinig o talagang abala sa ginagawa.

Finally, his hand stops mid-air and turns his head to me. Sweat is dripping from the tips of his hair, down to his shoulder. I frown. Naiinitan nga talaga.

"You're here..." he says, glancing back at the canvas as if he doesn't want to be taken away from what he's doing.

Unfortunately for him, I came here for business.

I shut the door behind me and walks toward him. He reaches for the rag and starts wiping the paint off his hands while watching me come to him. Nac-conscious ako pero inignora ko nalang ang nararamdaman hanggang sa makalapit ako sa kaniya.

"I lost my fucking job because of you!" I angrily spat.

Rigor tilts his head, confused. Nakatayo na siya pero patuloy pa rin sa paggalaw ang mga kamay niya. He gives me a quick once-over and then smirked.

"Mainit dito. Gusto mong mag-usap sa office?"

"Hindi mo ba ako narinig?" irita kong tanong sa kaniya. I hate that he looks like he doesn't give a damn about what I say and at the same time, he doesn't bother to hide the interest in his eyes when he sees me in a red dress. "Nawalan ako ng trabaho dahil sa kagaguhan mo."

"I'm not deaf, Czarina. I heard you." Rigor says as he starts walking towards the said private office. Inis kong binalingan ang aircon sa taas na mukhang hindi umaandar. I don't want an excuse to be alone in an enclosed space with him. At least here, there are glass walls. Rigor sees me glaring at it, and offers an explanation. "Sira ang aircon dito. I'm still waiting for it to get fixed."

He pushes the door open inside his private office. It's also very spacious. Compared to his studio, instead of glass walls, there are floor-to-ceiling bookshelves filled with all kinds of books about art and non-fiction. Nawala saglit ang galit ko habang iginagala ang tingin sa paligid. He walks straight towards a high table and began pouring himself some alcohol.

"Brandy?" he offers.

Umiling kaagad ako. I still have to drive home. I can't be drinking. I don't even remember the last time I drank ever since I gave birth to my son. I don't want him to see me drinking stuff because he'll start asking about it.

"Sorry I don't have anything else to offer here..." he sets down his crystal glass as his gaze lingers over me. "Unless you'd go on a lunch with me."

"Tigilan mo nga ang paglalandi mo sa kin. Simula nung bumalik ka, iyan lang ang pinagkakaabalahan mo!"

Rigor shrugs, grinning. "I don't have anything else to busy myself with, cherié."

"What am I, Rigor, a toy you can play with when you're bored?"

Nawala ang ngisi sa mga labi niya dahil sa sinabi ko. I doubt it's because what I said is true, but because he thinks I think of him this shallow.

"You didn't even ask me why I came back." He says in a brandy-laced voice, I could feel it down to my stomach.

I don't ask him why. I don't want to know. I don't want to mull over things once again. I don't like that he's confusing me even when I know that he's leaving. Again.

Suminghap ako at kaagad na iniba ang usapan.

"The stupid paparazzi published an article about us. Nakita iyon ng empleyado ko. They fired me on the spot."

"Guess they don't appreciate hot girls then," he shrugs nonchalantly.

I bared my fangs at him, completely angry now. "Will you please take me seriously? What the fuck is wrong with you? I just said I lost my job!"

Rigor takes a sip of his liquor and puts it down. Then, he gestures towards the empty plush seat in front of his desk.

"Take a seat, Czarina. We'll talk about your job."

"There is no job to talk about. I've already lost it!"

"You're going to lose it once again if you don't stop yelling at your future employer."

Napanganga ako sa sinabi niya. Rigor sighs and stares at his paint-splattered hands, then back to me.

"You really should have a drink. Just to calm you down."

"I won't have even a drip." pagmamatigas ko. I went to the chair and stare at him. "But I'm willing to listen to your offer."

He chuckled, as if it's amusing him. Pinaningkitan ko siya ng mga mata. Tama lang naman na bumawi siya dahil kasalanan niya namang nawalan ako ng trabaho. At this point, I'm just really desperate. But it doesn't mean I won't negotiate.

"I need an assistant, a secretary. I have an upcoming exhibit and to be honest, I could barely catch up with all the paperworks." He gestured towards the scattered papers on the desk. "I can't spend all my time behind the desk when there are deadlines for my pieces."

"That's it?"

"I also need someone to take care of things for me. Just the basics, cherié—booking flights, hotels, exhibits. You'll also take care of my emails, choose what offers to accept and reject. Attend a meeting in my behalf."

Pinag-isipan kong maigi ang sinabi niya.

"You don't have other assistants?" tanong ko sa wakas.

Rigor rubs at his jaw. "I have a cleaner who comes here twice a week, and an endorser. The rest of the work is on me."

"How much are you going to pay?"

"We'll start with Php 38,000 plus benefits and all insurances covered. You'll get some breaks, day-offs, and vacation. Plus..." he leans closer, allowing me to smell his scent again. "You get to see me every day..." he wiggles his brows.

"Fuck off." Itinulak ko ang mukha niya palayo. "Make it Php 40, 000 and I'm in. Plus, I get to choose my health insurance provider and I get period day-offs that are not covered by my regular day-offs."

Rigor's shoulders vibrated in laughter, as if he's expecting me to negotiate like this. "Wala ba akong ex discount?"

"Trust me, Rigor, presyong ex na yang inaalok ko."

"Alright, then." He shrugs and opens a drawer. "I'll ask my lawyer to draw up a working contract."

"Overtimes ARE paid. No funny business. No meddling with personal affairs. Walang pakialaman pag labas na sa trabaho. And most importantly, do NOT show up to my house unannounced." Dagdag ko pa.

"You know, you're quite demanding for a first-timer..." he commented, but with a smile on his face.

I finally lean back on my chair, starting to relax. I know I've won.

"Just charging my worth, Rigor."

"As you should." He picks up a pen and starts scribbling something, probably notes from our recent agreement. "I only have one rule, though."

Kinabahan kaagad ako at kaagad na nangunot ang noo. If he says anything weird, I'm out of here, no matter how tempting his offer is. "What is it?"

Rigor flicks his pen and puts it down on the table, looking at me seriously.

"Go to lunch with me."

My lips curl into a sensual smile, the smile I rarely use anymore. Napailing ako pero nangingiti pa rin.

"Lunch lang pala, e."

Nagpaalam muna si Rigor sa akin na magbibihis bago kami umalis. Apparently, he's living downstairs. He rented another commercial space to turn it into his house even though the costs are high, just to keep himself close in the studio.

Habang wala siya ay tiningnan-tingnan ko ang mga libro. I want to sort the books again. It would be a tiring work, but it would make browsing much easier. I started noting all the things I could improve in his studio, and all the things he should buy now that he has an employee working for him. A coffee maker would be number one on the list.

I heard footsteps, so I turn and see him in a white button-down shirt and denim. Mukhang nagmamadali paakyat rito dahil inaayos pa niya ang butones ng damit habang naglalakad. Sinalubong ko na siya at isinara ang pinto ng opisina niya.

"Let's go."

At least in my new job, I don't have to worry being spotted by a paparazzi when I'm with him again.

He mentioned while we were having lunch that my work officially starts tomorrow. Umuwi na din kaagad ako pagkatapos naming kumain. When I got home, I saw Shantel in my kitchen, preparing a cup of coffee. She looked up at me and smiled.

"Hi!"

"Hey," I put down my bag and immediately look for my son. Napansin kaagad iyon ni Shantel kaya inunahan niya na ako.

"He's sleeping upstairs. Katabi ni Kyros."

Tumango ako at itinuro ang coffee pot. "I need one of those."

"Sure."

Naupo ako sa high stool at pinagmasdan siya. She's been losing weight these weeks. Her cheekbones are hallowed, and I could almost see the bones on her knuckles. I suspect it's because of her unhealthy sleeping schedule. Once she starts studying, she barely eats anything and doesn't want to get disturbed.

"What's up? How did the orientation yesterday go?" tanong pa niya habang nagtitimpla.

I clear my throat before answering. Hindi pa niya alam na nagtatrabaho na ako ngayon para kay Rigor.

"Actually, I got fired because of that photo."

Nanlaki ang mga mat ani Shantel at napatigil sa ginagawa. "You mean, the one where you ass looks great?"

Inirapan ko siya, pero tumango din naman ako. "Yes, Shantel. The one where my ass looks great."

"Oh my God! Why?!"

"Calm down." I snatch my mug from her before she spills the rest of my coffee. I took a sip first before answering. "Apparently, reckless, partying whores are not welcome in a Catholic school to work. Don't worry, I got another job today, instead."

"Really?"

"Yep. I'm working for my ex."

Muntik nang maibuga ni Shantel sa akin ang iniinom niyang kape. She started punching her chest as she coughed and put the mug down.

"You are not!"

"I am." I take in a deep breath. Maging ako ay hindi rin makapaniwala sa nangyari.

"Oh, em, gee." She said, emphasizing each and every word.

"I know what you're thinking..." pinaningkitan ko siya ng mga mata.

"Will this set-up lead to a boss-secretary steamy affair with lots of sexual tension, too much wine, confessions, and you give birth to another version of Castian but in a smaller, female body?"

"Shantel!"

She laughed. "My sister used to write those kinds of stories when we were in highschool. I never thought it really happens in real life."

My cheeks flush with her choice of words. I never even thought about it! Isa pa, sobrang sakit manganak na hindi ko hihilinging maulit pa yun sa akin. I remember Shantel complaining that I almost broke the bones in her hands while I'm holding it.

Shantel abandoned her plans of studying for the night and forced me to tell her all the details about Rigor. Napaka-tsismosa niya at hinampas-hampas pa ako sa braso nang ilang beses kapag may nababanggit akong sa palagay niya ay nakakakilig.

After talking, I prepared dinner and the four us of ate together before I am alone with my son again. I plan to enroll him in a kindergarten school in Manila, but I can't risk a school near the studio. I'll just have to be careful. Besides, I trust that Rigor wouldn't pry into my private life as agreed over the ink.

Maaga akong nagising kinabukasan. Rigor didn't mention anything about a uniform, so I just put on a casual black pencil skirt and a cream sheer blouse. I put on my black heels and fed my son breakfast before waiting for Kyros.

"Baka gusto pa ni Rigor ng isa pang secretary, sabihin mo, willing to apply ako," he says while handing me the car keys. "Tangina, napaka-underpaid ng mga nurse dito sa Pilipinas!"

I chuckled and reach for the top of his head, messing with his hair. "I'll pray for your soul, Kyros." I joked and went inside the car.

I arrived at exactly 8:30 in the morning. Rigor gave me the spare keys yesterday. I was expecting to be alone because it's so early but the door is unlocked. I push it open and found him lying on the floor, sleeping next to his painting.

Nag-alangan ako kung anong dapat gawin. I don't want to wake him up. My plan is to clean the studio first before locking myself in the office to start with the paperwork. Clearly, it's not happening with him sleeping half-naked on the floor. I watch his chest rise and fall softly. His arm is covering his eyes while he sleeps, a habit he shares with his son.

Nag-desisyon akong magtungo nalang sa opisina niya habang tulog pa siya. I could make some coffee for him when he wakes up later on. My steps halted as I neared him. His lips are slightly apart, but the bottom lip is a bit wet that it looks like he just licked it.

I frown.

"I'm awake, Czarina." he suddenly said with his eyes still closed.

Muntik na akong mapatalon sa sobrang gulat. Rigor started chuckling and removes his arm over his eyes. Some strands of his hair are falling over his eyes. It's a bit long now, almost touching his shoulder blades. He used to keep it away from his face in a loose tie while he's painting. Rigor propped up an elbow against the floor and stares at me unabashedly.

"You're early today. Good job, employee."

I rolled my eyes at him. "You really should buy a coffee maker. Hindi mo sinabi sa aking dito ka pala natutulog sa studio, balak ko pa naman sanang maglinis."

"Don't worry, the cleaner will come this afternoon." Rigor pulled himself up and snatch his shirt on the floor.

Napatingin ako sa obrang pinagpuyatan niya. It's a portrait of a man in pieces. Rigor used all the shades of gray he could find to paint this man and instead of appearing dull, it's very emotional to look at. I immediately start wondering all sorts of titles he could come up for this painting.

"This is for a client from Singapore." He gestures towards the unfinished painting. "She wants me to paint her abusive father."

"Her what?! Why would she want a painting of someone who abused her?"

Pinagpagan ni Rigor ang maong na suot bago ako binalingan.

"She's going to burn it, Czarina."

"Oh..." I blinked as realization dawned on me. "So, she's like rich RICH, huh? She could afford your paintings only to burn it."

He chuckled, glancing once at the painting, before turning to me.

"Let's not judge her healing process." Iginiya niya ako sa opisina niya. "Now, I have my first job for you, cherié."

"Yes, I've been taking notes of all the things we could improve in the studio and the books-"

"No, that's not what I'm talking about." Rigor says while pushing the door open. Nangunot ang noo kong sinundan siya.

"Eh ano palang gusto mong ipatrabaho sa akin?"

He pours himself some brandy, and I wince at how he's drinking alcohol so casually in the morning as if it's water. Rigor places the crystal glass in the table after taking a sip while looking at me over the rim of the glass.

"It's my hair. I want you to cut it for me." he said hoarsely.

-

#HanmariamBFLIIChap4