26 September, 2023

I want you to help me live - bonjr, thomas reid, versor

Rain stands alone on the patio, his frame casting a long shadow in the September sun. His dark hair falls in disarray around his face, his eyes fixed on the horizon as he feels the cool breeze brush against his skin. He is lost in his thoughts, his mind a tumultuous swirl of emotions. His heart is heavy with sorrow, a weight that seems almost unbearable at times. He has found happiness with her, he has finally found someone who understands him, who accepts him for who he is. But the cruel world has taken that.

"I brought you coffee. If you're not going to sleep, you at least need some caffeine," Storm says softly.

Rain takes the cup gratefully, a faint smile playing on his lips. "Aren't you pissed at me? I ran your best friend out of town."

Storm shakes his head, his eyes filled with understanding. "Sage would have left anyway. You know her, always somewhere looking for her next adventure. She'll be fine."

"Sage was my first. I had a deep connection with her. Just not the kind she needed," Rain confesses, his eyes reflecting the pain he feels. "She's not angel. Angel is my home, being with her is as easy as breathing," Rain confesses, his eyes lightening up thinking of her.

"I understand," Storm insists, placing a comforting hand on Rain's shoulder. "Even Sage understands deep down."

"You two just weren't destined to be," Storm reassures him, his voice filled with warmth and understanding.

"How is she holding up?" Andrea appears, stepping onto the patio and closing the door behind her. Concern etched on her face.

"Not good, mum," Rain sniffs, his voice cracking with emotion. He looks up at his mother with pleading eyes, silently asking for help.

Andrea sighs heavily, her heart breaking at the sight of her son's distress. "I brought the iv."

TW: DEPRESSION

empty - olivia o'brian

As soon as anyone steps through the threshold
of this enchanting space, they're immediately greeted by the warm glow of sunlight streaming through the large bay windows, casting a soft and inviting ambience over every corner of the room. The walls are painted in a serene shade of pale blue, reminiscent of a clear autumn sky, and adorned with delicate floral artwork that seems to dance and sway with the gentle breeze that wafts through the open windows. The crisp white linens on the king-sized bed are pristine and inviting, beckoning them to sink into their soft embrace and drift off into dreams as fluffy clouds float across the ceiling in a whimsical display of creativity.

A whimsical chandelier hangs from the ceiling, casting a soft, golden glow over the room and illuminating the ornate vintage furniture that adorns the space. As they explore every corner of this ethereal guest bedroom, they can't help but feel a sense of peace and tranquillity wash over them. The careful attention to detail and the inspired creativity that went into the design of this space are evident in every element, from the hand-painted murals on the walls to the delicate lace curtains that flutter in the breeze.

No matter what beauty surrounds Sailor, all she can feel is emptiness. With Eden gone, the chaos is gone, the chaos that once filled her life is gone. Her days are quiet now, the loss of her father hits her like a ton of bricks, leaving her feeling lost and alone in a world that suddenly seems so cold and unforgiving. She lays in bed, not moving for a week now, as if the weight of the world is pressing down on her chest, making it hard to even breathe.

The depression grips hold of her, suffocating her in its dark and suffocating embrace. Both her parents are gone, leaving her feeling adrift in a sea of grief and confusion. The once bright and vibrant colours of the world now seem muted and dull, as if someone has cast a shadow over everything she sees. She used to be the life of the party, the one who could make everyone laugh and smile with her infectious personality. But now, she feels like a stranger in her own skin, disconnected from the person she once was.

She has fought with evil, leaving blood on her hands that she will never be able to wash off. The memories of those battles haunt her every waking moment, a constant reminder of the darkness that lurks in the world. She has seen things that no one should ever have to witness, and she has done things that will haunt her for the rest of her days. But she is not a hero, nor is she a villain. She is simply a woman born into this life. Her heart is heavy with the knowledge that more blood will be spilt. Her friends may die.

Isabella enters the room, the heavy weight of concern evident in her eyes as she sees her sister, lying motionless in the bed, staring blankly ahead. Her usually vibrant spirit seems to have been replaced by a dark cloud of sadness that looms over her like a heavy blanket.

Isabella softly strokes her hair, perching herself on the bed next to her. "Say say, I'm worried about you."

There is no response from Sailor, only the sound of her steady breathing filling the room. Isabella takes a deep breath, trying to push back the tears that threaten to spill over.

"The last time you were like this, we thought we were going to lose you," Isabella continues, her voice trembling slightly. "You need to eat something or at least drink something. You can't give up now."

"They're gone," Sailor finally speaks, her voice barely above a whisper. It is a simple statement, but it holds a world of pain and loss within it.

Isabella's heart aches at the raw emotion in her sister's voice. Their parents had been everything to them, their pillars of strength and support. But now they are gone, leaving Sailor and Isabella alone in the world.

"I know, sis. I know it hurts," Isabella consoles, reaching out to squeeze Sailor's hand gently. "But it's just me and you against the world now. I need you to get up and eat something for me. Please."

Rain enters the room, his heart sinks at the sight of Isabella looking up at him with helplessness in her eyes. He walks over to the bed, his footsteps barely making a sound on the plush carpeting of the bedroom. The dim light from the bedside lamp casts a soft glow over the room, illuminating the figure of Sailor lying motionless on the bed. Rain's heart aches at the sight of his love in such a state. Without a word, Rain sits down on the edge of the bed, his steady presence a comfort to Sailor even in her darkest moments.

when the party's over - billie eillish

With a gentle touch, Rain reaches out and brushes a stray lock of hair from Sailor's forehead. Without a word, Rain lies down next to her, pulling her into his arms. He wraps his arms securely around her, holding her close as if to shield her from the pain and darkness that consumes her. He presses a soft kiss to her temple, the gesture filled with love and reassurance.

"I'm here, angel," he whispers, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'm here for you, always."

"I've got her," Rain promises, looking up at Isabella with a reassuring smile. "You need to eat too. Sky has made your favourite meal in the kitchen."

Isabella nods gratefully, knowing that Rain is right. She needs to take care of herself in order to be able to take care of her sister. As Rain holds Sailor close, Isabella makes her way to the kitchen.

He gently takes her hand in his and whispers, "Oh, my angel, how far you've fallen but we're all here to make you fly again."

Sailor's body feels so small and fragile in his arms, her once firey spirit now extinguished by the weight of her thoughts. Rain can feel the pain radiating from her, her heart heavy with sorrow and despair. She has faced so much in her life, fighting against the shadows that follow her every step.

But despite her strength and resilience, the darkness seems to win, leaving her broken and lost. As he holds her now, Rain feels a wave of determination in his heart. He knows that he can't take away Sailor's pain, can't erase the scars that mar her soul.

But he can be there for her, can offer her his strength and his love in her darkest moments. He vows to be her beacon of light in the dark abyss. He vows to be her guiding star, leading her through the galaxy of her pain and sorrow until she finds her own way back to the brightness of her true self.

"Hey, Amor." Damien smiles, entering the room with Andrea by his side. "Andrea here is going to set you up with an IV okay."

Damien sits down in a chair beside her, taking her hand and caressing it gently. "This may sting a little, Amor, but we need to get some fluids in you, okay?"

Rain watches as his mother inserts the IV line into Sailor's arm, careful not to cause her any more pain than necessary. He can see the compassion in her eyes, and the will to help Sailor in any way she can. Andrea has known Sailor since the day she was born.

Andrea has always felt a special bond with her. She has always been like a daughter to her, and she will do anything to see her happy and thriving. Andrea can see the sadness in her eyes that seems to weigh her down, a pain that she can't quite shake. Andrea can see it clearly every time she looks into her eyes, and it pains her soul to see her beloved girl in such a state.

"My dear," Andrea begins gently, "I know that life has been cruel, but you are strong and resilient. You have so much potential and light within you. Please, don't let this darkness consume you." Andrea leaves tears welling in her eyes.

The steady drip-drip-drip of the IV becomes a soothing lullaby, gradually lulling Sailor into a state of peaceful surrender.

"You can leave now," Rain huffs, his voice cold and harsh.

"We need to call a truce between us, Ran. She needs peace at least for now because come the first, she might never find peace again," Damien implores, his tone calm and apologetic.

Rain looks down at Sailor, her face peaceful in sleep. He knows that Damien is right. For her sake, he needs to put aside his feelings of anger and resentment and make peace with Damien. "For her, anything. I can't forgive you, but I can accept you as part of my life for her," Rain concedes, his voice softening.

Damien nods, a look of gratitude in his eyes. He knows how hard it is for Rain to let go of his anger, but he also knows how much Sailor means to both of them.

poison tree - grouper

Rebel slouches against the wall, a concerned frown marring her usually stoic features. She watches as Sailor lies in the bed, staring blankly into the distance with a haunted look in her eyes. Her usually spirited friend seems to be lost in a fog of sadness, her once sparkling eyes now dull and lifeless.

Rebel can't help but feel a surge of sadness herself as she watches Sailor retreat into herself. Her brother and Sailor have been friends for as long as she can remember. They have grown up together, sharing laughter, tears, and a bond that goes beyond just friendship.

Sailor is not just her brother's friend, she is family to him and to Rebel. Rebel doesn't like many people, but Sailor is different. Sailor is Rebel's people.

Sailor is always full of energy and laughter, bringing joy wherever she goes. Her infectious smile lights up a room and her laughter is like music to Rebel's ears. But now, seeing her friend so despondent, Rebel feels a pang of despair in her heart. She longs to reach out and bring Sailor back to herself, but she doesn't know how.

"Hey, gumdrop," Rebel hums softly, trying to break the silence. "I'd tell you I'd kill you if you told anyone I said that, but you're not doing too great right now, so I guess I'll let you off."

Rebel sits beside her on the bed. "I think I'd be depressed too if my hair looked like this," she says with a teasing smile. "Let me plait it for you."

As Rebel sits behind Sailor, gently running her fingers through her friend's long, tangled hair, she feels a deep sense of responsibility. She knows that Sailor has been going through a tough time, shutting herself off from the world and withdrawing into herself. Rebel hopes that by creating this simple plait, she can help Sailor relax and feel a moment of peace.

The silence between them is heavy, broken only by the soft sound of hair being twisted and woven together. Rebel concentrates on each strand, feeling the weight of Sailor's emotions in every movement. She knows that words can't fix everything, but maybe this small gesture can show Sailor that she is not alone.

Sky enters the room. His expression is grave, and Rebel can tell that he needs a moment alone with his best friend. Understanding the unspoken request, Rebel gently bops Sailor on the nose and quietly slips out of the room, leaving the two friends alone. With a heavy heart, Sky places a pack of cigarettes on the bedside table next to Sailor, hoping that it will bring a small smile to her face.

"I know how much you like stealing my cigarettes, so I brought them for you," he simpers softly, the words met by silence.

"If you don't get up, I'll tell you all the hot and heavy details of me and Issy." Sky teases, desperate to get a reaction.

For a moment, Sky thinks that Sailor will finally look up and acknowledge his presence, but Sailor remains still, her eyes fixed on the wall. Sky feels a stab of misery as he realises just how deep Sailor's depression has taken hold of her. For a week now, Sailor has been withdrawn and distant. She hasn't spoken, hasn't eaten, hasn't even looked Sky in the eye. It is as if she has lost all interest in the world around her as if she has given up on everything that once brought her joy.

Sky gets into bed with Sailor, pulling her close to him, and wrapping his arms around her fragile frame. "Oh, little flame," he whispers, his voice barely above a whisper. "We need you. I need you."

Sailor doesn't respond, doesn't even flinch at his touch. But Sky doesn't let that deter him. He holds her tighter, burying his face in her hair, breathing in the familiar scent of vanilla that always surrounds her.

"I know it's hard," Sky continues, his voice trembling with emotion. "But you're not alone, little flame. I'm here for you. We all are. Please, don't shut us out."

There is a long moment of silence, broken only by the sound of Sailor's soft breathing. Sky can feel her body relax against his, her tense muscles slowly unwinding under his touch. It is a small victory, a tiny glimmer of hope in the darkness that surrounds them.

six feet under - billie eilish

"Rebs did this plait didn't she? I can tell, it's terrible," Aquarius remarks, her voice tinged with a hint of amusement.

Sailor remains silent, her gaze fixed on a point in the distance as Aquarius carefully begins to unravel the tangled mess. The plait seems to hold a memory, a moment frozen in time when Sailor's spirits were brighter and her laughter more carefree. As Aquarius works, she can't help but feel a prick of sadness at the stark contrast between Sailor now and the lively, bold girl she once knew.

Aquarius sets to work brushing out Sailor's hair, the brush gliding smoothly through the silky strands. She works in silence, the only sound in the room is the gentle swish of the brush. Sailor lies in bed, her eyes unfocused and distant, lost in the darkness of her own thoughts.

"I haven't known you long," Aquarius begins softly, "but I've fought by your side and I'm going to continue fighting. So you need to fight too. Fight for yourself, fight for your happiness."

Aquarius continues to brush her hair, the repetitive motion almost hypnotic in its rhythm. She whispers words of encouragement, hoping to break through the walls Sailor has built around herself. She thinks back to the day she had first met Sailor, their paths crossing at Rain's club with their mutual friends.

The music blaring, the laughter filling the air, and Sailor, the queen of the party. It seemed like just yesterday that she had met the playful and lively Sailor, full of energy and joy. Sailor had stood out from the crowd with her infectious smile and outgoing personality. She is the kind of person who could light up a room with her presence, drawing people in with her magnetic charm.

And she had certainly drawn her in that night, leaving a lasting impression on her from the moment they had met. But now, she looks at the fragile figure lying before her. It is hard to believe that the same person now before her, a skeleton of her former self. The spark in Sailor's eyes that had once been so bright and full of life has dimmed, replaced by a hollow emptiness that seems to stretch on forever.

Zane bursts into the room with his usual excitement, diving onto the bed beside Aquarius and Sailor. Aquarius shoots him a warning glance, but Zane seems unfazed as he tries to get Sailor to join in on his playful antics.
Storm enters the room quietly and takes a seat in the chair beside the bed. His steady gaze meets Aquarius's troubled eyes, and she can sense the unspoken understanding between them. Storm has always been the one to provide a sense of calm and stability in times of chaos, and Aquarius finds comfort in his presence.

"I'm going to get coffee," Aquarius announces, needing a moment of respite from the emotional turmoil in the room. She knows that she needs to gather her thoughts and come up with a plan to help Sailor through her tough time.

As Aquarius leaves, Zane turns his attention back to Sailor. "You know, when me and Angel were young, we used to play pretend kitchens. That's actually what got me interested in cooking," he says, trying to elicit a response from Sailor.

"Come home to find out her first meal with you guys was prepared by you, I was horrified. You can't cook for shit." Zane exclaims.

"I'm not that bad," Storm protests, but a hint of amusement sparkles in his eyes.

"We once had to get the whole kitchen renovated because you burnt it down." Zane jokes, poking fun at his friend's culinary shortcomings.

"Fair point," Storm admits, laughing along with Zane.

Sailor remains unresponsive, lost in her own thoughts. Zane looks at her with a mixture of concern and confusion. "Come on, Angel, snap out of it. We need your starlight back in our lives," he pleads, but Sailor remains silent.

Natalie and Noah appear at the door, their faces filled with worry. "We'll give you your space," Storm says softly, as he gently guides Zane out of the room.

Storm lingers for a moment. "Don't let it win," he expresses, his voice filled with both compassion and determination. "Keep fighting. You have an army of supporters behind you."

astronomy - conan grey

As Noah and Natalie take their places on either side of Sailor, they can't help but feel the weight of the situation. Sailor is battling depression once again, and this time, it seems more daunting than ever before. When they first met Sailor at sixteen, she had been fighting depression for months.

A fight she seemed to win. She had become a bright and lively soul, full of energy for life. But over the years, the darkness has slowly crept back in, casting a shadow over her once shining spirit. Now, nearly ten years later, Sailor lies unresponsive in bed, her eyes vacant and her movements slow and lethargic.

Everyone has tried to help her, but nothing seems to bring her back from the depths of despair she finds herself in. It pains them to see their friend in such a state, to witness the spark that once lit up her eyes slowly fading away. The three friends lie in silence, each lost in their own thoughts as they stare up at the ceiling.

"Remember when we first met, princess? I had the biggest crush on you, yet somehow you chose my douchebag brother," Natalie teases, nudging Noah playfully.

Noah pretends to look offended. "Hey, I'm sexy as hell. Can you blame her?" he retorts, winking at Natalie.

Sailor remains silent, her eyes fixed on the ceiling. She is trapped in a dark and lonely place, unable to find her way back to the light. Noah and Natalie exchange worried glances, unsure of how to reach her. Their hands intertwined with hers, hoping to provide some comfort. Their hearts break at the sight of her so lost.

Natalie reaches out and gently wraps her arm over Sailor, offering a comforting squeeze. "You're not alone in this. We're in this together, remember?" she whispers, her voice filled with love and determination.

Noah nods in agreement, his eyes filled with empathy and concern. "We've got you, princess, we'll always have you," he reassures her, wrapping his arms around her in a warm embrace.

But Sailor remains unresponsive, lost in her own thoughts and fears. The weight of the world feels too heavy to bear, the darkness too overwhelming to escape. She feels as though she is suffocating in the vast universe, unable to find her way back home.

Natalie leans in closer, her voice soft but firm. "Princess, please come back to us. We miss you. We need you," she pleads, her words laced with tears.

runaway - aurora 

The sun has set, leaving Sailor alone on the cold floor of the patio. The night sky is dark, a thick blanket of darkness that mirrors the overwhelming sense of despair that has settled in her chest. She sits hunched over, taking a long drag from her cigarette, the nicotine providing a temporary escape from the heavy weight of sadness that seems to suffocate her.

Rain begins to patter around her, the sound blending seamlessly with the tears that stream down her face. Each drop that falls from the sky feels like a stab to her already shattered heart. The rain is a cruel reminder of the storm that rages within her, the storm that has been brewing for far too long.

Sailor has been battling depression since her mother's death. It is a constant companion, a shadow that follows her everywhere she goes. Some days are better than others, but lately, it feels like the darkness has consumed her whole. As she takes another drag of her cigarette, the smoke curls around her like a protective shield.

She exhales slowly, letting the comforting sensation wash over her. She knows it is a bad habit, but it is the only thing that seems to offer her any sort of relief from the overwhelming pain she feels. The nicotine buzz is a welcome distraction from the endless loop of negative thoughts that play on repeat in her mind.

The sound of the rain hitting the pavement is soothing in a way, a gentle lullaby that offers a brief respite from the chaos of her thoughts. The rain begins to pour. She closes her eyes and tilts her face upwards, letting the cold drops wash away the pain she has been holding onto for so long. But even the rain can't wash away the pain that has taken root in Sailor's soul.

It is a deep, gnawing ache that seems to have no end. The weight of it drags her down into a dark, suffocating abyss. With a trembling breath, she stands letting out a primal scream, a raw and guttural sound that echoes through the empty garden. It is a release, a purge of all the pent-up sorrow and anguish that has been festering inside her.

The sound of her own voice seems to reverberate through her body, shaking her to the core. And for a brief moment, she feels a glimmer of relief, a fleeting sense of liberation from the suffocating grip of her depression. But as the echoes fade away, the pain returns, still as sharp and unyielding as before.

Sailor sinks to her knees, feeling the wet ground beneath her as she lets the rain wash over her. She feels so small, so insignificant in the vast expanse of the world. Tears mix with raindrops as she cries, her sobs muffled by the pounding of the rain.

Rain kneels down beside her, his hand reaching out to touch her face. "Angel," he whispers, his voice quiet under the pounding of the rain. "It's going to be okay. I'm here for you."

She turns to look at him, her eyes filled with sorrow and pain. "I just feel so lost, Rain," she chokes out, her words coming out in gasps between her sobs. "I don't know how to escape this darkness that's consuming me."

Rain's heart aches for her, knowing that he can't fix her problems with a simple touch or a few comforting words. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her close and holding her tightly as the rain continues to fall around them. He can feel her trembling in his embrace, her body wracks with sobs. They stand there in silence, the rain continues to fall around them, a relentless downpour that seems to wash away the tears that stain Sailor's cheeks.

Rain can feel the weight of her sadness, the overwhelming sense of despair that seems to surround her like a cloud. He wants to say something, to offer her words of encouragement or hope, but he knows that sometimes, words are not enough. Sometimes, all you can do is stand by someone's side and let them know that they are not alone in their pain.

Sailor's lips crash onto Rain's, desperate for a feeling, any feeling, to break through the numbness that has enveloped her for so long. She wants to feel alive again, to feel something, anything, to remind her that she is still human. But as the kiss deepens, Rain pulls away, his eyes filled with concern and love.

"Take it away. Make me feel something," Sailor pleads, her hands gripping Rain's top, desperation etched across her face.

But Rain shakes his head, his voice filled with sorrow. "Not like this, Angel. I want nothing more than to be with you, but not like this."

Sailor's eyes are wide, almost pleading, as she looks up at him. "But I need this, Rain," she whispers, her voice cracking with emotion. "I need to feel something, anything, to remind me that I'm still alive. Please, don't take this away from me."

Rain lifts Sailor off the ground, their bodies pressed together in a passionate embrace.
She feels a wave of emotions flood over her as Rain cups her face in his hands, deepening the kiss with each passing second. She has never felt more safe than she does at this moment, wrapped in his arms with her legs now securely locked around his waist.

TW: SMUT

painkiller - ruel

Rain scatters delicate kisses over Sailor's body, starting from her forehead and moving downwards. His lips trail along her jawline, down her neck, over her collarbone. Each kiss is light and feathery, a touch that is both soothing and tantalizing. She closes her eyes and lets out a soft sigh, feeling the warmth of his lips against her skin.

This wasn't about his pleasure, Rain knows. It is about taking away the pain in Sailor's heart, about showing her that she is loved and cherished. And so he continues to kiss her, to shower her with affection and tenderness. Each kiss feels like a promise of better days to come, a reminder that even in the darkest of times, there is always a glimmer of hope.

His hands are trembling as he slowly traces the curves of her body, starting at her waist and moving up to her breasts. She lets out a soft gasp as his hands find their way to her chest, his touch gentle yet firm. Massaging them gently, he watches as her eyes flutter shut, lost in the pleasure of his touch. As his hands move lower, tracing the contours of her hips and thighs, he marvels at the wonder of her body.

She is a work of art, a masterpiece to be savoured and admired. Every curve, every line is perfect in its own way, a testament to the beauty of the human form. Rain's fingers slowly trail their way down her still-damp body, tracing patterns of desire and longing. Inching closer and closer to the source of her desire.

His touch is like a symphony of pleasure, each stroke of his hand sending waves of euphoria crashing over her. As he reaches his destination, her body trembles with anticipation. His fingers move inside her with a gentle touch, eliciting a gasp from her lips. He slowly stretches her out, claiming her as his own in a way that makes her heart race and her breath catch in her throat.

She feels like she is floating on a cloud of bliss, lost in the sensation of his touch and the intensity of their connection. Moving up her neck and jaw, he leaves a trail of kisses that makes her quiver with need. He lifts his head and meets her gaze, his eyes intense with desire. Without a word, he leans in and captures her lips in a deep, soul-stirring kiss.

The sensation is overwhelming as if every nerve in her body is on fire. She can taste the sweetness of his lips, feel the warmth of his mouth, and she surrenders herself completely to the moment. Her body aches with need. He knows exactly how to touch her, how to make her moan and writhe beneath him. His touch is both gentle and commanding, a perfect balance that drives her wild with desire.

She moans into his mouth as he continues to move his fingers, each stroke sending her spiralling towards a place of ecstasy. Her hands clutch at his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin as she surrenders herself to the pleasure he offers. And then, just when she thinks she can take no more, he whispers her name in a voice filled with longing. The sound of her name on his lips sends a jolt of desire through her, igniting a fire within her that burns bright and fierce.

He kisses a path down her body. As he reaches the apex of her thighs, she can feel her pulse quicken in anticipation. Feel the tension building within her, a deep ache that only he can soothe. With a feather-light touch, he teases her, tracing circles around her clit, causing her to whimper in need. His touch is maddeningly gentle, yet the intensity of it sends sparks flying through her body.

She arches towards him, silently begging for more. She bites her lip to stifle a moan, her body shaking with the need for release. He can feel her body responding to his touch, her breath coming in short gasps. His tongue flicks against her clit with expert precision.

The pleasure is overwhelming, a tidal wave crashing over her, engulfing her in a sea of sensation. She arches her back, unable to contain the cries of pleasure that escape her lips. And then, with a final, ethereal touch, he brings her to the brink of release. Her body convulses with pleasure, her mind clouds with ecstasy. She cries out his name as she gives in to the pulsing waves of pleasure that wash over her, leaving her spent and satisfied.