Dean pushed himself from the pew and raced over to Cassandra's side, dropping down onto his knees and turning her onto her back as he pulled her into his lap. "Cassy?" Dean choked, brushing a lock of hair from her face.

She showed no response.

"Cassy, wake up. I don't care if you're evil and playing a game, you can't be dead. It's not supposed to end like this." He shook her slightly and his voice cracked as he pleaded, "Princess, wake up!" Dean pressed two fingers to the side of her neck, breathing in relief when he felt a faint pulse. "Sammy, she's alive but she's weak." Dean looked up. "Call an ambulance."

"Dean, she has Grace. What would happen?"

He shook his head as a stray tear slipped down his cheek. "She's been hospitalized before with Grace. What's the difference? Call a friggin' ambulance!"

Not bothering to argue with his brother, Sam obliged and pulled out his phone.

Dean continued to try and wake the blonde up, constantly checking her pulse, but she never showed any sign of consciousness. It felt like an eternity before they heard sirens, and an eternity in Hell by the time the paramedics raced in.

Their words seemed to fall on deaf ears as they questioned Dean, so Sam answered instead.

"What's her name?" one inquired, sliding her onto the backboard after wrapping a brace around her neck.

"Cassandra. Her name is Cassandra Moore. Uh, she's thirty-three and I don't know of any major allergies to medication. She used to have to take a lot so I think she'd be okay," Sam explained. He helped the paramedic load the board holding Cassandra onto the stretcher, and he gently pulled Dean up from the floor to follow them.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. We found her here after she called. No one else was in the building," the younger Winchester lied smoothly.

The paramedics started to load her into the ambulance and Dean followed, snapping out of his shock once they tried to stop him. "Fiancé. I'm her fiancé," he said. "Please, I have to be with her." He glanced over to Sam. "Sammy, take the car and meet us at the hospital." He tossed his little brother his keys without another word right before the doors to the ambulance slammed shut.

Reluctantly, Dean stayed out of the way so that the paramedic could do his job. He watched as they poked her with needles and connected her to a machine that registered her weak heart rate.

Dean reached forward and gently grabbed onto her hand, sniffling. "Baby, you gotta wake up," he whispered.  "You're strong. You've survived everything. You can't give up now. You gotta fight. You hear me? I need you to fight. Fight, Princess, for me. You aren't allowed to join Jess just yet."

The paramedic glanced over to the Hunter with sorrowful eyes once he could do no more but wait until they arrived at the hospital.

Dean rested his forehead on hers and closed his eyes. "Amara couldn't have taken all of your Grace. If you flatline, you better shoot up gasping for breath the minute we enter that hospital. You're the Savior, remember? You're my Savior."

Dean had followed the paramedics and nurses into the hospital as far as they'd allow until he was cut off by a short, stubby nurse in horrid purple scrubs. She pushed Dean back and told him to go wait in the waiting room, but Dean refused to listen. He kept his gaze on the retreating stretcher until Cassandra disappeared from sight and a pair of familiar hands were yanking him back. He shook his head and turned to Sam with tear-filled eyes.

"Dean. Dean, listen to me," Sam demanded. "Cassy's gonna be fine. Amara seemed to like her. Maybe she left her human, okay? Amara wants to keep you content, right? Your connection draws her to you. She knows that you love Cassandra and that you aren't happy without her. Maybe she was giving you what you wanted."

Dean stared back at his brother in disbelief. "What I wanted? Why would I want my girlfriend in the hospital?"

"Not hospitalized; human. Think about it." Sam's gaze drifted over Dean's head towards the doors and he started to lead him back to the waiting room, silently praying that Dean wouldn't snap out of it until they were seated.

~*~

An hour and a half passed before a doctor stepped out into the waiting room, grabbing Dean's attention instantly. He had been tapping his foot on the tile for the past hour without a break and he was pretty sure his lip was bleeding from biting it so hard.

"Cassandra Moore?"

Sam and Dean rose to their feet and the doctor approached the two Hunters. He glanced down at his clipboard and swiped his tongue over his lips and nodded to himself.

"Well? How is she?" Dean pressed eagerly, bouncing on the balls of his feet with a worried frown etched onto his face.

"She's okay."

The Winchesters breathed a sigh of relief.

"She's weak, though. I'm surprised she's stable considering the fact that whatever happened took a major toll on her. Now, we looked into Cassandra's history and it was quite interesting. Cassandra Angel Moore is her full name, yes?" he inquired.

Dean let out a sigh and hung his head. He should've known this would happen. "She showed up as deceased, didn't she?" he muttered. Dean shook his head. "It's a long and complicated story, one you probably wouldn't believe—"

"Cassy was in witness protection," Sam interrupted. "Her biological father was out for her and he had access to federal files, so we had to fake a death report. She had fallen off the grid for six years but only recently came back since he was no longer a threat." Sam dug his fake badge from his pocket and flashed it to the doctor before stuffing it back in his jacket.

The doctor's eyebrows rose in shock. "Well, that's not quite what I was expecting." He chuckled. "But somehow it has happened before."

Sam and Dean exchanged glances and shrugged. They got lucky then.

"Anyways, in her file it had said that she was unable to reproduce due to the fact that they had to remove an ovary after an...unfortunate situation years back. When we were running the tests, we found that she had both ovaries perfectly intact. Maybe you could explain that to me, Agents."

Dean couldn't help the grin that spread across his face despite the situation. They could still have a chance to get out. "Uh, God...maybe his sister?"

"Sure," the doctor dragged out. He cleared his throat, eyeing the two men warily. "She's awake if you want to see her. Maybe you can ask if she saw God's sister and requested an ovary. That'd be a new story for my wife."

"Uh, thank you, Doctor," Sam said with a nod. He acquired the room number before he and Dean raced down the hallways, stopping just outside of the stark white room. They both hated it which meant Cassandra despised it.

Dean stepped into the room first, a small smile playing on his busted lips when he saw her sitting up. She winced as she shifted around and let her head fall back to the pillow, gritting her teeth and clutching her arm. She glanced down at her forearm and lightly ran her finger over the handprint, frowning.

"Princess?"

Cassandra gasped and jumped, turning her head to see Sam and Dean standing in the doorway of the room. Her face paled and guilt burrowed deep in her stomach at the sight. Part of her was hoping that she'd wake up alone. "Dean." She sounded...disappointed.

"How are you feeling?" Dean asked softly as he forced his feet to move in the direction of the bed. He lowered himself into the blue plush chair next to the bed and went to take her hand in his when she pulled it into her lap, turning her head away. Dean frowned.

"I'm fine," she whispered. She fumbled with her fingers and glanced down at them, lightly closing her eyes as a tear slipped down her cheek. "I'm..." Cassandra's hand shook as she raised it, flexing her fingers and twisting her wrist as she focused on a vase on the counter across the room. "Powerless," she finished.

Sam and Dean exchanged glances and she dropped her hand into her lap and ducked her head down, swiping away a tear.

Cassandra shook her head and she choked back a sob. "I'm human and weak and vulnerable and untrained and—"

"Hey," Dean cut her off, taking her hand in his. "Cassy, you're alive. That's all that I care about. I don't care about your powers, I just care about you."

She looked up to him as another tear betrayed her. "But I do." Her voice cracked and she sniffled, gasping for a breath to push back a sob. "I'm nothing without my Grace, and Amara and Lucifer know that. They will come for me, Dean. I've made enemies I can't beat. God, I should have never exposed myself at the Bunker. If I hadn't then I wouldn't have been at that church by Lucifer's side. I would still be a Nephilim." Cassandra's shoulders shook as she sobbed and she clenched her eyes shut, pulling her hand from Dean's. She pulled her legs up to her chest and rested her forehead on her knees and let her hair fall over to cover her face.

Dean sighed and pulled her against him carefully, pressing a kiss to the top of her head before he started to rake his fingers through her blonde locks. "Hey, it's okay," he said softly. "You don't need your Grace, Cassy. You've got Sam and I."

"No, I don't." She pulled away and shook her head, wiping away her tears before more betrayed her. "I told Sam that you wouldn't want me after all of this because I knew you'd never look at me the same."

"So then why help Lucifer?" Sam inquired, shaking his head. "If you knew you'd lose Dean, why didn't you use Lucifer as a ride out then side with us?"

Cassandra looked up through bloodshot eyes. "Because I learned my lesson the last time I played both sides with an archangel and it ended in death." Cassandra let out a choked breath. "Lucifer was right," she said with a nod. "I am nothing without my powers."

"I don't remember him saying that," Dean said. "If I remember correctly, and I do, Lucifer said that you're nothing without your powers and Dean Winchester. Last I checked, I'm Dean Winchester and you still got me, Princess." Despite her trying to pull it away, Dean grabbed her hand and took it in his. "And I'm not leaving you because I understand. I've been where you are. I tortured people in Hell because I couldn't resist the pain anymore. I gave in, just like you. Baby, you held out longer than me and you were being tortured by Lucifer himself. You and Sam are stronger than I ever was."

Cassandra's gaze slowly rose to Sam who nodded.

"Dean's right, Cassy," Sam told her. "A year after the Cage, the wall in my mind broke and I was walking around with hallucinations and memories of Lucifer and the Cage. You know what kept me going, though?"

She shook her head.

"You. Whatever Michael and Lucifer did with my soul, it didn't overpower what you did. You hadn't broken yet. I saw you, Cassandra, and you helped a lot."

"I don't understand. I don't even remember—" Her gaze dropped to the sheets and she stared at the fabric blankly. "I don't remember Hell," she whispered. She shook her head. "No, I remember the time and the frigid air that was so cold it burned, but I can't remember Michael and Lucifer or when I broke. I can't remember." She looked up and her chest heaved as her heart monitor started to beep rapidly. "I can't remember. Dean, I can't—" She gasped for breath.

"Hey, hey. Cassy, Cassy, look at me. Look at me, Baby," Dean told her, standing up and leaning in front of her. He smiled when her gaze involuntarily shifted to him. "Look at me. Focus on my voice, okay? Focus on only me. Listen to my voice and my voice only. I'm right here."

She studied his features and tried to take everything in, but she could only feel the panic of not being able to recall anything from seven-hundred-forty years down in the Cage.

Dean squeezed her hand tightly, making his presence known to her. He smoothed her blonde locks back and brushed a strand behind her ear. "Princess, hey, look at me. Calm down. You need to calm down. You're still weak. You can't be stressing yourself out."

She shook her head and looked away. "I can't remember!"

"Cassy, you don't need to remember. Trust me, it's better if you don't. Please, Baby, just calm down. Okay? Calm down for me. Just breathe. Those memories, they don't matter. What matters is us right here, right now. Okay? We're back on Earth. We're away from Lucifer and Amara and Michael and anyone else who wants to hurt you." He glanced at the heart monitor as her grip on his hand tightened. It was going crazy, and he knew that it definitely wasn't good for someone in her condition. "I'm right here. No one's gonna hurt you again."

"They always do. Someone always hurts—" She buried her head between her knees and began to sob again.

Dean looked up. "Sam, get the doctor."

"Dean—"

"Sam, now."

Nodding, Sam backed out of the room and raced down the halls in search of Cassandra's doctor, leaving his brother and Cassandra alone. Dean continued to attempt to calm her down but no matter what he did, nothing worked.

Minutes later Sam returned, the doctor in tow. "She won't calm down," Sam explained. "Usually Dean can get her to relax and calm down but it's not working this time."

"I can't—" She gasped as the tears continued to fall, oblivious to the doctor's presence. "I can't remember. Dean, I can't. Why can't I remember? That's seven-hundred-forty years worth of memories, so why can't I remember one hallucination or vision or something?" Her grip on his hand tightened. "Seven-hundred-forty years and not a single memory! I can't remember, I can't—"

"I know, baby," he whispered in a soothing voice. "I know, it's okay. You don't need to remember."

"No, I need to. I need to know what he did. I need—"

"Cassandra?" the doctor asked in an attempt to grab her attention. He sighed when she never tore her gaze from Dean. "Cassandra, what's wrong?"

"I can't remember them. I need to remember them." She was addressing the doctor now, but she still stared at Dean.

"Remember who?"

She shook her head and swallowed. "I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"You'll lock me back up and think I'm crazy. I'm not crazy! I swear I'm not crazy!" she screamed.

"No one is saying you are," the doctor assured her. He glanced up at Dean who shrugged and shook his head before the doctor pulled a syringe out of his pocket.

Cassandra's gaze snapped towards the syringe upon sensing movement. "No. No, no sedatives." Her chest heaved rapidly, faster if even possible, almost alarming. She inched away from the needle and buried her head in Dean's chest and fisted his shirt, screaming as the doctor pierced her skin with the needle. "No! No! Stop!"

Dean held her head against his chest and raked his fingers through her hair when she began to thrash around, keeping her steady so that her doctor could inject the sedative without any damage. "Cassy, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay, baby. Everything's fine."

"No." Her voice was soft; tired. She weakly shook her head. "No, I don't...I don't like the drugs. They—" She gulped. "They block it. They block my Grace. Dean, I need my...I need my Grace. I need my Grace. We have to st....we...st—" She gasped for breath to stay awake. "Amara."

Dean nodded. "Sam and I will handle Amara and your uncle, okay? Just sleep." He felt her grip on his shirt weaken and the heart monitor proved that the sedative was working. He slowly and gently eased her back onto the pillows, but she still grabbed onto his wrist in a failed attempt to stop him.

"No," Cassandra muttered, turning her head as if she were trying to shake it. Her eyelids felt heavy and they drooped, betraying her. "No, Dean. Don't....don't go. Please don't....I—I need—"

"I'm right here," the Hunter assured her as he lowered himself back into the chair, letting the doctor back away so that Dean could calm her further. "I'm not gonna leave your side. I promise. Sam and I are right here. We're not going anywhere."

Cassandra gulped and her eyes closed, but she fought against the sedative. "No, we need to find them before...before he finds me." She struggled to open her eyes.

"He's not gonna find you."

"I'm human. I'm....I'm not warded. I haven't be—been warded since....since the crash with Ru—Ruby." She gasped. "Dean, please." Her voice cracked. "No, I'm vulnerable here. He'll kill me. Lucifer will...will kill me. I....I betrayed him."

"You're safe, baby," Dean said, smoothing back her wild blonde locks. "You're safe." He pressed a kiss to her forehead and a few tears slid down his cheeks as she struggled to pick up her hand.

Her hand felt heavy, almost as if she had a dozen bricks strapped to her fingers. Was this what an angel blade felt like? She couldn't remember. Cassandra knew they were heavy, but it felt like it had been an eternity since she had last held one. Her fingers loosely curled around his jacket and Dean grabbed her hand.

"Dean, no." A single tear slipped down her cheek. Her voice was hoarse, and he could tell that she had been trying to sound strong. She was trying to play off how badly Amara had injured her.  "Don't do this. Please. Make it stop. I don't want it." She was too weak to sob, and for that she was grateful. She hated being weak in front of Dean.

"Stop fighting it, Princess. You're just gonna wear yourself out." His heart clenched in his chest at the sight. He hated to see her like this. It was hurting him more than it was hurting her. "It's okay. Just sleep."

"No. I don't wanna," she mumbled. Her voice was soft and breathy and Dean knew that the sedative was winning despite how hard she fought. "Mm. Dean."

"I'm here. Just sleep. I'm gonna be right here the whole time, Princess."

Dean felt her hand fall limp as she gave in, letting the weariness of the drugs take over.

Dean looked up to meet Sam's and the Doctor's gaze with teary green eyes as he rubbed the pad of his thumb on the back of Cassandra's hand. He could tell that the sedative had finally won.

"Would you mind if we step out into the hall real quick?" the doctor requested, his gaze fixed on Dean.

Dean glanced to Sam. "Sam, go with him."

"Dean—"

"Sam. We all live together. I'm sure you can answer his questions." He looked to Cassandra, relief flooding over him at her steady breaths and steady heart rate. "If it's something I need to answer, you can come back in. I'm not leaving her."

Sam sighed but nodded, following the doctor into the hallway.

Dean eyed them but returned his attention to Cassandra and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you," he muttered. "I'm confused and pissed as all hell, but I still love you. I'm here for you through all of this. Human or not, you're still my Savior." He felt her lightly squeeze his hand, a reflex that she had acquired when they started sleeping in the same bed a little over six years earlier. Dean wasn't sure if it was a simple need to have some type of physical contact with him, or if it made her feel safe, but he never minded it. He actually felt himself smile upon the action and he reached out to trace her jawline with his fingers, and he wiped away any stray tears.

Dean took this as his chance to finally get a good look at her. She was pale, paler than usual, and she had a hand-shaped bruise on her forearm where Amara had grabbed her. Anger boiled in Dean's blood. Amara had hurt her and taken away the one thing that made Cassandra want to live. She had ruined her all because Dean wanted a normal life. All because Amara was desperate to please the Hunter.

Sam and the doctor stood outside of the room, Sam's hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans as he hunched forward slightly.

"I'm Doctor Roy, by the way. I realize I never introduced myself. You two are Sam and Dean?" he asked.

Sam licked his lips and nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, we're the ones that took Cassy in about seven years ago." He furrowed his eyebrows. "Do you know exactly what happened to her body? Like how weak she'll be and for how long?"

"Well, she had a concussion so I'd like to keep her for a few days. She also had a cracked rib or two, but she had no cuts or scrapes or bruises anywhere on her body besides that hand-shaped bruise. It's like something beat her from the inside out." The doctor shook it off. "I'd like to focus more on her mentally. I know that her file is pretty full and that she has a history with hospitals."

Sam managed a chuckle and nodded. "Yeah."

"I also noticed that the reasons for her suicide attempts were because she said that Lucifer would rise if the Seals were broken. I'm aware that she was raised in a religious environment, but she's also an Atheist. Her trauma seems to be connected to all things biblical. Angels, demons, Heaven, Hell; is there a reason for that?"

"When we took Cassandra in, her mom and best friend had been found dead. I think that connections to her family have overwhelmed her as an attempt to hold onto some normalcy," Sam lied smoothly. "Look, she's been without her meds for a long time. We didn't have the resources to acquire them, but I noticed that she was okay whenever she was with Dean. He seems to keep her stable."

"So what was she like when Dean wasn't around?"

"To tell you the truth, I really don't know. They were always together. Our family is very tight-knit. We had her staying with our Uncle Bobby back when she was with us for a year and that's where we mostly hung around."

Doctor Roy glanced back in the hospital room before returning his attention to Sam. "So if she's okay with Dean, why didn't he calm her down this time? What was so different?"

Sam sighed. "It's been six years since she went into hiding. There's a little strain on their relationship, and whatever just happened to her is obviously still affecting her. She just needs time, Doc. She's Cassy. She always bounces back."

Doctor Roy nodded in thought, swiping his tongue across his lips. "Sam, she just had a full on mental breakdown, screaming that she couldn't remember seven-hundred-forty years worth of memories and that she needed her Grace. Who is Amara? Why the interest in Lucifer? What—What goes through her mind?"

Sam hung his head and closed his eyes. How could he explain that without both he and Cassandra sounding mental? Sam looked up. "She was a diagnosed schizophrenic, right? She hasn't had her meds. We weren't with her for a long time. Maybe she just needs her meds again. She was fine when we first took her in."

"Sam, I can't just give out pills." Doctor Roy sighed. "I think it's best if we admit her into the psychiatric ward."

Sam's eyes widened.

"Just for a few weeks," Doctor Roy quickly continued, holding up his hand. "I just want to evaluate her and figure out what's going on. Using Dean as a crutch is teaching her to always rely on another person and that's not healthy."

"Cassandra knows her limits," Sam argued. "I've seen it. Doc, she was a psychology major. She got her Doctorate degree in psychology. She knows all about this stuff." Sam sighed. "Please, just don't admit her into the psych ward. Keep her in this room for as long as you want, but not the psych ward."

Doctor Roy glanced back into the room, watching Dean whisper soothing words in her ear as she slept peacefully. "I want to keep her here for a few days at the least and try to figure out what happened. If she really can't remember, then we'll make sure the rest of her is okay and we'll send her home." Doctor Roy held up a finger when Sam grinned and started to speak. "But she needs therapy and you can't argue with me on that. If she doesn't go to her appointments, then we're back to the psychiatric ward option. Those are the terms."

"I'll talk it over with Dean and Cassy when she wakes up."

Doctor Roy nodded. "Okay. I'll be back when she wakes up to run some more tests." With that, the doctor turned on his heel and retreated down the hall.

Sam quickly rushed back into the room and took the seat next to Dean. "Okay, so, we have two choices."

Dean looked up and sniffled, his eyes red and puffy. "What are they?"

Sam tried not to let himself get distracted by the state his brother was in and instead focused on Doctor Roy's options. "So he can either admit her into the psychiatric ward and we can attempt to get her transferred to the hospital near the Bunker, or he can keep her here for a few days and evaluate her and make sure she heals okay. He'll send her home with her old meds and she'll be required to go to therapy. If she doesn't, then they'll admit her and there's no telling how long they'll keep her."

Dean sighed and glanced back to Cassandra, shaking his head. "You really think she needs her meds?" Dean asked softly.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, I do. The only reason she hadn't been taking them was because they blocked her Grace. Now that it's gone..."

"She has nothing left to hold onto," Dean finished, earning a nod of agreement. "I guess we can do the therapy thing. I mean, it's better than leaving her alone with a bunch of unskilled and untrained doctors in the chance of a demon or an angel coming after her. We just have to figure out how to get her there if we're out on a hunt." He ran a hand down his face and sighed, shaking his head. "Maybe we shouldn't have pulled her out."

Sam's eyes widened. "Dean!"

"No, Sam, I mean, look what happened. With you, we just had to get your soul back and fix a year's worth of torture when your walls broke. With Cassy we've got seven centuries of torture and hallucinations along with twenty-six years of trauma."

"On the bright side, there's one less pill she'll have to take," Sam said in an attempt to lighten the situation. "She's not actually schizophrenic, I don't think. We just let the doctors believe she is. We don't have to worry about Angel Radio anymore or teaching her about her powers."

"No, but she's gonna be on like six other drugs. Depression, anxiety, insomnia, pain killers, and maybe more if that stupid doctor prescribes more." Dean sucked in a sharp breath. "Did he tell you the physical damage?"

"Oh, yeah. Uh, she has a concussion and a cracked rib or two. He didn't mention anything else, but he did say that it's like whatever hit her beat her from the inside out, so I'm gonna guess that she's weaker overall."

"Of course she is. She's fully human now. She's not hopped up on Michael and Lucifer juice." Dean stared back at Cassandra in thought. "Why couldn't I calm her down? She didn't remember anything from the Cage, so if she doesn't remember hallucinations then she doesn't remember anything Lucifer filled her mind with." Dean turned to Sam. "Why wouldn't she listen?"

Sam sighed. "She was begging for you to help her, Dean. I mean, she was in hysterics and clinging to you. She's probably been sedated so many times in her life that it brings back old memories. If she's human then all of her emotions are heightened. She's always been a Nephilim. She's never felt any of this before. Imagine how Cas felt when Metatron had taken his Grace, okay? Now put Cassandra in those shoes and throw in all of her problems. I think we would have reacted the same."

"I'm scared, Sam," Dean admitted, his voice cracking as he spoke. He shook his head. "That episode was nothing compared to what she's done before. She doesn't have Grace to save her this time. What if she snaps? God's gone. He's not gonna bring her back and neither will Lucifer. We saw their faces when Amara had her. Cassandra was scared. She knew Lucifer would come for her."

"Dean, we'll get through this. We just have to wait for her to wake up and figure out what she remembers." Sam slapped his knees and rose to his feet. "I'm gonna go get coffee. Want some?"

Dean only shook his head. Once Sam had left the room, Dean wedged his way into the hospital bed with the blonde and laid on his side next to her, running his fingers through his hair.  Eventually exhaustion had taken over and he fell asleep next to her, curled into her side with their fingers intertwined.

~*~

Cassandra groaned and clenched her eyes shut when she came to, instantly regretting her attempt to open them after a white light blinded her. She could hear the faint hum of machines and the familiar beeping of a heart monitor around her. A heart monitor. Why was there a heart monitor?

Turning her head, the blonde forced her green eyes open to see her heart rate displayed across a screen next to her for anyone to read. Her vitals spiked abruptly when she felt someone shift next to her. She turned to see Dean's eyes flutter open, a smile crossing his lips when he found that she was awake. Her vitals slowly returned to normal and she breathed a quiet sigh of relief.

"Hey," he whispered, his voice groggy and thick almost as if he had been crying. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I got hit by a truck." She winced and brought a hand up to clutch her head. "What the hell is going on?"

"You don't seem all that worried to be waking up in a hospital," Dean noted.

Cassandra scoffed. "It's kind of become a normal thing for me. It happened quite often when I was in college." She cracked a smile and chuckled softly. "Seriously, though."

Dean furrowed his eyebrows. "You don't remember? Cassy, baby, you had a full on episode and they had to sedate you."

Cassandra's face fell and everything started to come back to her. She could see herself in the church with Lucifer and Amara and she could hear Amara speak, watching the Nephilim in awe. The intrigue and fascination had quickly died out when Amara sucked the Grace out of her, consuming it as if it were a soul and she had been starving for eternities.

A tear slipped down her cheek when she realized that everything that happened hadn't been a dream, but reality. She was human; Graceless. Cassandra's eyes fluttered closed as Dean reached out and wiped the tears with the pad of his thumb, cupping her cheek in his hand.

"Cassy, it's okay," Dean whispered. "You're okay. You're safe."

She rested her head against his chest and her shoulders shook as she sobbed, her fingers curling around his shirt. She said nothing. She only let Dean rest his chin on her head and hold her close against him, stroking his fingers through her blonde locks.

"Shh. It's alright," Dean soothed. "We're alright." His gaze rose to the doorway to see Sam standing there with food in his grasp. He took notice in how Sam's face fell and the younger Winchester only turned away, retreating and giving Dean and Cassandra their space. Dean looked back down to his girlfriend. "Baby, it's all okay."

"Why'd she have to target me?" Cassandra choked out. "Lucifer was right there and held more power. She had Rowena and Crowley. Why me?"

"I don't know," Dean lied, shaking his head. "I don't know, Princess." He leaned back as she sniffled and pulled away, staring up at him with bloodshot eyes. Dean frowned. "What?"

"Why are you still here?"

"What?"

"I tried killing you and Sam. Why haven't you put a bullet in me or left me for Lucifer and Amara to kill? I betrayed you."

"You were under Lucifer's control. You didn't have a choice," Dean reasoned.

Cassandra furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head slowly. "Dean, Lucifer wasn't controlling me. Nothing can control me, not at that time."

Dean's face fell and he felt his heart drop. "What?"

She nodded. "I gave in willingly. Everything I said, that was all me." She cocked her head to the side. "I thought you knew that."

"But his eyes—"

"He was in my mind, but he was bringing up old memories as motivation every time I started to doubt him. That wasn't control, that was...."

"Deception."

"Persuasion," Cassandra corrected. Her hand flew to her mouth and she choked back a sob. "Oh my god. I killed Jofiel. He tried to warn the others and I killed him without a second thought. I'm a monster."

"No, Cassy. Stop. You're not a monster. You were confused. You were gone for so long and you had nothing to hold onto or stop you from allying yourself with Lucifer. It's okay." Dean sighed. "We will figure this all out, okay? You just need to focus on getting better. You're weak right now."

"Please, Dean."

"What?"

She gripped his shirt. "Please, don't. Don't make me stay here. Don't let them heal me."

"Cassy, if you exhaust yourself too much you can die. You have a concussion and cracked ribs and your entire body is weak. You gotta stay here for a few days."

"I know."

Dean's eyes widened. She knew. She knew what would happen if she left. She knew she'd die and she was okay with that. Cassandra wanted to die. He clenched his jaw and shook his head. "No. No, I lost you once. I'm not losing you again. You're just overwhelmed right now. Just sleep."

"Dean, I don't have my Grace, I don't have any skills, I'm weak, I've killed people and angels, I tried killing you, I sided with Lucifer; I don't deserve to live. Michael was right. I am an abomination."

Deep down, Dean knew that she wasn't overwhelmed. He knew that she had lost any will to live after losing her Grace, and he knew that this was who she was before he had first met her. Dean knew that the girl in the bed with him wasn't the Nephilim he had fallen in love with, but the girl that held no meaning to her life and was just trying to survive without her sister. Cassandra was truly broken.