[Light Yagami x Reader][Edited may 20th 2019]

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Light's POV.

     "Well you only need the light when it's burning low

     Only miss the sun when it starts to snow

     Only know you love her when you let her go

     Only know you've been high when you're feeling low

     Only hate the road when you're missing home

    Only know you love her when you let her to

     And you let her go,"

    It's been a week since (Y/N) broke it off with me. A week since I've been back at HQ. I miss her. It was some argument, I don't remember what over, but I was so blinded by rage and my desperate want to win, that when she threatened to leave, I urged her to. I lied through my teeth. I told her I hated her, I told her I didn't need her, I told her I didn't want her. Every single bad thing I said was a lie and it eats me inside. I was blank of emotion other than rage, but no more than five minutes after she walked out with her stuff, and I realised I may have lost her did I realise that I love her, I really, really truly loved her. She told me all the time, but I took it for granted. I never even said it back.

    "Staring at the bottom of your glass

     Hoping one day you'll make a dream last

    But dreams come slow and they go so fast,"

     I sit silently at the desk, (Y/N) isn't here yet, but I can feel all eyes of the team staring at me. I down my coffee in almost one gulp and stare blankly at the bottom of the mug. I imagine myself moving on, holding someone new, loving someone new, protecting someone new. But every time I try to imagine my dream girl being with me, I see (Y/N), I smell her perfume and feel she softness of her delicate skin. She was my dream girl. It took my entire life to find her and a single word to throw her away. Leave. Perhaps someday, if another dream comes true, maybe this time I can make it last. Just maybe. Although, I don't want another dream if I could just make this one last.

    "You see her when you close your eyes

    maybe one day you'll understand why

    Everything you touch only dies,"

     I love her. I worked it out right after the fight. I understand why she's the only girl I can think of, she is in every fibre of my being. After the fight I went on a rampage. I trashed everything in the apartment. I destroyed everything and I slowly watched the home and shell of everything I loved die at my hands.

    -skip chorus again-

     "Staring at the ceiling in the dark

    The same old empty feeling in your heart

    Cause love comes slow and it goes so fast,"

     I remember laying in bed that night. I was in the spare room, because I couldn't stand to be where (Y/N) was supposed to be, but where I knew she wouldn't be. I couldn't sleep, my eyes were fixed on the ceiling as if watching a movie. I was watching the movie in my head of the fight, mentally kicking myself for letting go of the only love I've ever known. The only thing I felt was emptiness.

    "Well you see her when you fall asleep but never to touch and never to keep

    Cause you loved her too much and you dived too deep."

     My breath catches in my throat as I hear the door open and I turn to see (Y/N) walking in. She's a detective on the case so I suppose I should expect it, but, its like I'm falling in love with her all over again. I want to grab her, hug her, hold her, love her - but that would spook her. I don't know if I can even speak to her anymore.

     "Well you only need the light if your burning low

     Only miss the sun when it starts to snow

    Only know you love her when you let her go

    Only know you've been high when you're feeling low

    Only hate the road when you're missing home

    Only know you love her when you let her go,"

    I watch as she shuffles past me to Ryuzaki and she stops just behind where he's sat crouched on the chair, facing the desk.

     "Ryuzaki?" Her voice is timid and tired. I watch her intensely.

    "Yes, (Y/N)?" He spins to her and she holds out a was of paper I scarcely noticed her holding. He takes it from her asking: "What is this?"

     "My resignation." What the hell?! Ryuzaki looks at her shocked.

    "You're quitting?" She nods sadly.

    "I'm leaving for England tonight." Her voice is frail and its killing me, knowing I am probably the reason. She wouldn't leave for England because of me, would she..?

    "I understand." Ryuzaki nods "I wish you the best for your future."

    "Thank you." She nods and heads for the door, and I watch her every movement, but I don't dare speak. I don't know what I even have left to say that would change her mind.

    "Only know you love her when you let her go

    And you let her go,"

     I watch her step out of the door, and it dawns on me, this will be the last time I will ever see (Y/N) again. The door closes behind her, its like a barrier that I can't pass, and she's taking my life, my heart and my soul with her. I lay my head down on the desk in despair.

    And for the first time in as long as I can remember...

    I cry.

..................