Roxana

Thiago gets out of the car just in time for me to catch a last glimpse of him.

I didn't see the men. I was too disturbed and distracted to pay attention to my surroundings, but as soon as I hear Italian, even without seeing them, I run. It doesn't matter that I am wearing very high heels; I run for the door of the apartment block as if my life depends on it because it does.

And it is not only my life, Dani's too.
I toss the heels and run up the stairs. One of them hits a guy in the face and he stops—idiot's luck.

Is it even a good idea to run to the apartment where Dani is? Fucking Shit!

No! Another guy is suddenly in front of me on the narrow staircase, coming from the floor above. Fuck.

"Please, sir. What do you want from me?"

I know what you want, I just need a diversion.

"Signorina, don't make it more difficult than it has to be." When he speaks, I vaguely recognize the guy. He used to be one of the people Tomaso and Marco gave orders to. It means it's Stefano's men, not Lorenzo's. What the actual fuck?!

Gunshots sound outside. Are they going to kill Thiago? I don't want any more people to die because of me. I don't want another guy that helped me to die.

The mafioso takes advantage of the moment, grabs me tight, and presses a cloth over my mouth.

"Please don't kill Thiago," I mutter.

"Sure..."

"Dani..." Then everything turns black. 

My body feels lead-heavy. I don't know how much time has passed. Is it morning? Afternoon? What day is it? Where am I and what am I doing here? 

A heavy hand is shaking my body but I don't manage to open my eyes. I think I am tied to a chair.

"Wake up, clumsy Swiss girl. We need to talk."

Who is this again? Where am I?

Wet and cold is dripping all of a sudden all over me. I breathe in shock and open my eyes forcefully. 

I am in what looks like an old warehouse.

Stefano is hovering over me. Three other men are in the room. None of them is Tomaso. The guy that brought me here, I recall now that his name is Fabrizio or so, frowns and looks at me in disgust. 

Dani. Dani is not here but where is he? Did they kill him?

"Dani," I mutter. He signals the bodyguards to exit and they do right away.

It's only me and him but I am dizzy and tied to a chair.

"So. Now that you are awake, we need to talk. Some unforeseen things happened and we need to adjust our plan. If it were for me alone, I would have left you to live your little sorry life in Brazil. But now it's more complicated, and more profitable in a different way."

"Where is Dani? We had a deal. I kept my end of the bargain."

"Yeah, well. So, Dani is still in Rio. And he will stay there with your lover, both safe and sound if you behave. Don Lorenzo only wants you. And that only because I was so gracious to not tell him that your brother is alive. If you care about his life you will keep it this way. See, I also kept my end of the bargain as well as I could. He could have found and killed you both."

"Is Thiago alive?"

"Yes, he is. We didn't hurt him... badly. Though the boys were tempted. He was quite brave; for an unprepared, unarmed guy he did a hell lot of damage. Good job, you got yourself a little bodyguard."

"Please don't hurt him."

"We won't. Mainly because I don't care about him or about your brother and Lorenzo doesn't know or care where and how I found you."

"He wants to kill me."

"Well, yeah. Most probably. And torture. But you, not your precious brother that you sacrificed everything for. Thanks to me."

"What do you want?"

"For you to not talk, under any circumstances, about what happened. You acted on your own account or someone different employed you. I don't care. Well actually, you get extra points if you say it was Alexei Orlov who made you shoot Marco. But under no circumstances you can tell it was me. If you do, you know I will kill your brother; I will rape and torture him beforehand. He will not go easily. Him living a safe, happy, long life, depends again on you."

Not again. But if I die, Lorenzo will be satisfied. It will be justice for Marco and he will not search further. Dani can live in Brazil safely. Thiago will take care of him. He will be safe and happy. 

"Okay. I will not say anything. When?"

"When do I hand you over? I will let him know today. Depending on how murderous he feels, he will be here in days or hours."

"Why not kill me yourself? Dead girls tell no tales."

"Oh, are you not a smart one? And you are still very pretty. I could also fuck you. It would be fun. But I am sort of not in the mood. Why do you think, silly? Because he obviously wants you alive. That was the condition for the bargain. However..." 

Stefano's fist sinks in my stomach, then in my ribs, then in my chest. 

"This was for trying to screw me over and for fucking my brother. I don't like it when women do me dirty. Granted I got my revenge but there was still some bottled-up aggression. Greet Lorenzo from me."

"Stefano, wait? What guarantee do I have that you won't give Dani away?"

"As always, none. But I won't this time. There is just nothing to gain from it. That's all but a lot for you to lose."

He exits and closes the door casually. One of the men comes back. I don't know him and as much as I beg him to untie me, he only says that he doesn't speak English. 

I fall asleep and wake, and fall asleep again. There is no food, only some water the guy drips into my mouth once in a while. 

I dream a lot. Mostly about Dani but I also see Thiago's face often in my delirium. Blood is trickling from his mouth, his eyes are closed and his body lays motionless on the sand in front of his mother's bar.  

We should have never met. Now that lady almost lost her son only because he wanted to help some lost souls.

Thiago was candid and humane in our relationship. He cared for me, took me in with all my issues, and did everything humanity possible to help. We owe him the only livable time this past year. And I, I was a cunt to him more often than not, constantly finding excuses to not get involved, to not feel anything for him.

In one of the dreams I close his lifeless eyes and he grabs my wrist and opens them again. But now they are dark not hazel and I  cry up because they are hateful and that is the one hateful gaze that makes my heart shattered unlike any before.

I am horrible and I deserve what happens to me. I took a life and despite what everyone might say, I know I took the life of someone good.

And now another good person could have died because of me. If my organs are shed all over the southern hemisphere it wouldn't be punishment enough. But Roxi, Thiago is not dead, get a grip.

Lorenzo takes his sweet time or is it that time is relative; it only feels like forever. All my muscles ache and I keep fainting and swirling back to consciousness. 

Maybe I die before he comes. Would be bad luck, grampa Medici. But there is a part of me that doesn't want that easy death, maybe an atom but still something. A part of me wants to look him in the eyes and tell him I am sorry. As crazy as it may sound, I think I understand best how he feels. Ironic, isn't it?

"E lei?/ It's her?"

"SÌ.  Sono sorpreso che abbia mantenuto la parola data./Yes. I am surprised that he kept his word."

"Dopotutto è suo fratello.  Sono cresciuti insieme./It is his brother after all. They grew up together," says another male voice.

"Avevo i miei dubbi che significassero qualcosa per qualcuno della famiglia Messina.  Eppure eccoci qui./I had my doubts that means anything to a Messina. Yet here we are."

I wake up at the whisper. Oh God, he is finally here.

"I ..., I am sorry. I am so very sorry." My throat is dry and the voice is only a pitiful crooning.

"Of course you are, now when you are about to die." Lorenzo's voice is slow and steady. He is wearing a dark blue suit and no tie. The last months made him look older and younger at the same time; sharper yet more apathetic.

Death has his face and there is no trace of mercy on it.

"Who do you work for?"

Here we go.

"Who do you think I work for?" I gather the energy to say. He will not appreciate the sass.

"Only the devil knows, but you fooled us all. Even me to some extent. That is an accomplishment. I thought you were trouble but not fucking death and betrayal of the lowest. Who do you work for?"

"What do I get if I tell you? You will kill me anyway."

"A clean death. So, who is it?"

"I am self-employed." If this is not going to earn me at least a slap I don't know what will.

"You insolent and foolish girl." He is fuming by his expression but seems in excellent health because this is heart attack material. Despite the anger, he doesn't touch me. "Whoever did your disguise, is a master because there is no crack in it. From your sorry home in Moldova to the work in Switzerland, everything seems perfectly real. Who do you work for?!"

"Nobody. I do everything myself."

"I don't believe you."

"Who cares if you do."

"I think the saddest thing about looking at you now is that you have nothing of value in your life. Your family is dead, if it was your real one. Even the only friend you seemed to have in that life, vanished. And the saddest part of all is that you had a truly extraordinary man to love you. Whatever witchcraft you employed, it worked, and he really loved you. But you shoot the best thing that ever happened to you."

His eyes are very expressive but I don't know what to read. Maybe anger, frustration, and pain, maybe pity, maybe all of them, or only disgust.

"What deal do you have with Stefano?" I want to know if he lied to me.

"Your life for a very lucrative business deal for him. And my trust. Or so he thinks, but I didn't feel the need to tell him I will never trust him."

So money in one form or another. How pathetic.

"Shoot me now."

"No. I will not kill you, I am a man of my word. But I never said I will not let you die."

His lips stretch into a sad smile.

"I give you three days. Maximum. I hope they will be agonizing."

The only thing he does is to tape my mouth and then he walks out the door.

I am alone in this room for a long time, again plagued by delirious dreams.

Then. Later. I don't know how much later; there are some voices outside and the door opens again with a creek.

A man is walking towards me. My vision is blurry. He is wearing military attire but tighter, reminds me a bit of a ninja and a face cover. 

Then the door opens again and two others run inside after him. They are dressed more "Italian" in dark suits.  

"Sir, you cannot be in here." One of the guys says something I barely understand.

The first guy that entered, signals them to stop and looks at me for a few seconds. He has dark eyes, so dark you can barely distinguish the pupil. And I can't breathe. He moves his hand up to remove the face cover. 

"Untie her." My eyes are glued to his face.

"Ma.../ But..." The other man cannot hold his gaze.

I barely notice how the ties are cut on my legs. 

It's done. I am dead.

I try to stand. My legs barely support me but I step forward, trembling.

"Marco," I try to say but the gag stops me.

He looks different, a bit slimmer, his hair is longer, and he wears a beard now but it's him. And this might be delirium.

And I, I have never felt so many things at once.

"Sir..." says one of the other guys again.

And then his palm collides with the left side of my face so fast and hard I fall to the ground.

Blood from my nose wets the sand.

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I have feelings about this chapter. Life is never that straightforward, is it?

What do you think?