Dear Six Year Old Me,

I know it seems hard. I know that you want to cry most days. I know that they don't understand what you are going through, you don't even know what you're going through.

Things will look up. Don't be bitter.

One day you won't have to go to the principal's office because you peed your pants. You may have to wear diapers still at night, but one day that will get under control. Unfortunately, it won't be until you're in high school.

Don't worry about school. After the first grade school year you won't have to go back to second grade, you will be able to go through school at home.

Those classmates of yours that you think aren't your friends? Yeah, you're right, they aren't. They think they can help you, but you're the weird kid who cries and pees her pants more times than anyone can remember. It becomes a routine of going to the front offices where they know you by your face and know why you're there; you had another accident.

While your classmates learn how to ride their bikes with no training wheels, you're inside reading chapter book years above your grade level.

Don't let that get you down.

One day, you won't have to worry about harsh teachers who yell at you. One day, you won't have to constantly worry about wetting your pants. One day, you don't have to worry about crying over 'nothing'.

You're strong.

You defeated those ants in the classroom bathroom, and a classmate thought it was a normal thing. It made you want to cry and be a cry baby, because that's what everyone saw you as.

When Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus came to your school, you cried that day. It wasn't because you were afraid, it was because you have this HUGE heart. Before the two came to your class, you had been writing a letter to a military soldier who was overseas. You had cried because your dad was prior military, you understand that a kid somewhere was missing their parent as they fight in something that can't always be seen.

You have guts.

While your teacher had brushed it off as fear, you couldn't speak up because that got you into trouble before. You will never see that teacher again.

That mean old lady who traumatized you and gave you this psychological need to always be the teacher's pet. You can't stand the fact that people trash their teachers because you had been one too many times.

You learn.

You learned maybe you didn't understand your teacher and you want to make up for what you thought about that mean, old teacher.

She really wasn't the best for you.

You had thoughts of hurting her because she hurt you.

Don't let this year get to you.

You have great art and music teachers. You love your computer class where you can play educational games.

Even that special needs class helped you.

Keep going strong.

And keep writing and singing, they WILL get you far...

5/10/18