A/N: 2k reads and 36 in fanfiction this story is going somewhere istg thank you my shiteus :> 💕

September 7, 11:08 pm

nam seolhee.

One of the things I hate the most is when people lie to me.

Well, I know everyone hates liars and that's a well-known fact. But it's just one of the things I detest the most. Everything related to lies— infidelity, disloyalty, untrustworthy, all these adjectives are what I believe the most contemptible in a person. I don't want to spend the rest of my life living with someone full of lies, and this is on of the reasons why I couldn't accept what Jungkook. had told me,

I'm still flustered about what the Jungkook guy told me a few hours ago. I'm obviously not beautiful inside out. I'm mean, ugly, miserable and tormented. My life is already crushed ever since I was born. It's all simple and understood, I'm most imperfect being there is. The thought of the words that came out of his mouth were all sick lies, I disagree with what he said so much.

But what bugged me the most is that he wasn't the first one to tell me that.

Sigh. Get over it Seolhee, he probably says that to everybody.

Geez. That guy is probably too nice. Probably too nice to trust.

My hand landed on my scarred cheek, feelings its soft stinging pain that exists still now. It happened about half an hour ago when my mom had a sharp chef's knife on her hand. She aimed to cut my wrist open but after many tries of trying to stop her, she accidentally wounds my cheek instead. She was satisfied, anyway, and now she's locked in her room.

I still remember what he told me.

He used to always tell me to trust him, and I always did with no doubt. He made me feel things I never felt before and took me to places I've never been. He was everything to me and I thought that all the things we had together were a product of love. But after all I knew none of it was true. He was all that I hated. He was once of the worst things that turned me into this, a messed up teenager. Teenagers shouldn't be like this, they say, teenagers shouldn't spend their puny years thinking about being suicidal and depressed as fuck.

Teenagers are all about wrong ideas of love, thousands of casual flings, even one night stands, hanging out with the wrong crowd, and belonging to a stereotypical group. I was part of those shitty things that a person experiences in being a teenager, and I knew I learned from them. That's all because of him.

He told me he will never try to hurt me.
He told me to believe in him.
To trust him.
I did.

That's what was wrong about me.

I was too naïve and helpless that all the people I've learned to trust aren't always there for me. They're all just playing with you. One minute, they'll get your affection and the next second, they'll play with your feelings and throw you away. I was desperate for love and never learned the meaning of it. Why not? It was probably because I have never felt it, I never learned about it, and I was never interested, until this stupid guy came.

Dear No One,

Donggyu is back again to kill me.

I saw him back in school today, and my classmates told me he's threatening to kill me. I didn't know what to do, I just cried, lost my mind until this guy helped me.

- SH

It was Donggyu who I saw earlier that had that menacing glare directed at me. I was appalled, speechless and completely horrified. It didn't take me a while to fully examine his expression. I couldn't even explain what I saw. He just looked so mad, as if he had a raging grudge against me. Why? Is it because of what I did? What I thought was right?

Why the hell was he back?

I didn't know they were the same person, my first love— in fact the one I also thought will my only be and the guy who's threatening to kill me after running away because of the warnings.

My ex best friend Heerin told me.

She told me all about what Donggyu was trying to tell me.

It was all him. I was head over heels over him. It was him who took me as a whole. The one who stole my heart, my soul and my virginity at sixteen and the one who promised to stay with me forever.

But I knew they were lies. Heerin and my mom told me he was playing with me and just wanted to make me pregnant at a young age and leave me alone. Everything he had promised weren't true. All his memories with me were thrown into waste when I found out about the truth. Those so-called-memories weren't supposed to be treasured at all.

I ran away from him and never showed up anymore. He left my school in search for me since he thought I was gone forever so he looked for me. And now that he found out I was alive, Eunhye told me that he's planning to kill me for escaping his wrath.

I was so scared that I broke down. Fear got the best of me. Until that guy came along.

Why would he ever want to help me?

Before throwing the rock I just wrote on to the sea, I first took notice of another rock I have on hand. I ran both my trembling thumbs down its rough surface, and winced at the pain of my wound hitting its coarse surface. I saw the rock down the slope of the till, my recognizable handwriting was on it and when I picked it up earlier I saw another writing at the back. It wasn't mine at all.

"My name is No One, your senpai. And I'm finally noticing you."

I'm still confused. Who could've written it on this? Is he/she trying to communicate with me? Am I ever going to catch this person?

Most of all, is that person still around?

There can be any possibility.

I wrote 'Are you reading this? -SH' on another rock and placed it near the roots of another tree, along with my letter for this mysterious person called 'no one' which is someone after all. I hope something comes out of it.

~

September 8, 7:43 pm

jeon jungkook.

I knew SH was a girl.

Probably the girl I saw throwing rocks at the sea the other day.

The possibility of the person being a girl is too big to think it was actually a guy.

I want to figure out her name.

Sunhee? Seonhye? Solhee? Sohee? Seonha?

(A/N: r.i.p i indirectly promoted u frostyclouds )

I read the two rocks sent to me carefully, reading between the lines as I examined each word. There was a question on a rock asking if I was reading it followed by a worth that I didn't want to see. She mentioned the word kill and a guy named Donggyu. I know a Donggyu from this school but I have no idea if this girl even goes to my school.

But I'm worried as hell.

Is someone going to kill her?

I took a deep breath and got my permanent marker from my bedroom table. I looked at the few rocks I gathered with me and wrote short encouraging sentences on each rock, including: You'll get through it, Fighting SH!, Everything's better if you smile, If you day turns out good then mine is too.

One thing I know for sure is that I don't regret any of these sentences I've written.

But what made me pause for a moment is what I wrote next. I know that she doesn't have a clue of who I was. I don't know almost a thing about her and no matter how much I look at what I wrote, I'm still hesitant. Who knows if this is just a fool writing stupid sob stories about himself?

But then I realized, it doesn't really matter.

My eyes dropped on the four-word sentence I've written.

'I'm here for you.'

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