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Poet's Note: "Dear Joyous" bounces back and forth between light and happy and dark and depressing more than any other poem in this book, and that is 100% intentional. This world we live in defines 'joy' as the same thing as 'happiness', but the truth is... they are truly not the same thing at ALL. And I know, you grammar police are looking at me right now like, "Um, Rea, those words are SYNONYMS, that means they mean the SAME THING." But as this poem will tell you (for point making purposes) they don't. In life, we have good days, 'happy' days, filled with momentary pleasures and small successes, and those are good, don't get me wrong. I love those days. But as we can all attest to, not so happy days always follow. And that's how I've discovered true joy, not dependent on circumstance or flighty weather, rather the mindset of the heart, something no disappointment can ever take away.

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Dear Joyous,

Mornings of sparks dimmed in heartbreaking nights,
Look for rainbow after the storm, a now mere fanciful flight;
Life of dreams and nightmares, sunny and rain torn days,
But peace's presence only lasts a slim moment, till it's off on its way.

And when the clouds loom, you cry, until they slowly drift on by,
But sunshine's a flighty thing, gone right before your eyes;
Summer a snap of the hand, leaves shrivel up and fall,
And now you're right back again, to where it started it all.

So your tears hit the floor, if only time could rewind,
But then you'd have to face this again, yet another pained time;
Crying out yet once more, you don't know why you even try,
You should expect happiness to end, when night falls in blue skies.

And you know it's not a done deal, sun will rise tomorrow,
But night's hours always seem to stretch on, longer into forever;
Cutting daylight short, forcing you restless into the dark,
Sweet dreams yet in your hopes, but not a probable thought.

Counting blessings like sheep, cycle on repeat,
Till the phase passes for awhile, at bay long as you can keep;
Life's years chipping away, less energy everyday,
You try to make it okay, by smiling despite the pain.

But it's useless to hold, when inevitably it will go,
Why set yourself up for more loss, another kind of hurt?
Look back, and you break, now that it's all said and done,
Where is the purpose in this dance? 'Cause there's no pleasure at all.

And at night's turn, your mind's set, till morning's wake up song,
When the beauty shifts your whole view, it's not so bad after all;
Leaping on fluffy clouds, gentle breeze in your hair,
Never have felt so free, as if you're twirling on air.

But even though you try to ignore, you know pain's knock at your door,
That what lies ahead ominously, is not far off anymore;
So when gravity yanks you down, you know you shouldn't be surprised,
But here you're crumbling shattered again, merely another time.

Missing hope, longing for love, searching for comfort or peace,
Happy days now a memory, with the security that you need;
Trapped though you're in the wide open, staring up at the sky,
Squeezing eyes shut over the tears, that you wish you could hide.

Maybe it gets more bearable with time, or you grow immune to the pain,
Grieving despair numbing your heart, no matter what route you take;
If those golden gates could swing open, maybe it'd be easier to believe,
Cause paradise seems a ruse, when fogginess's all you see.

Even with the outline of time, you'd have to suffer in this way,
Cause knowing the destination doesn't give, the trip less toll to take;
You can't fly over the trees, you have to trek through the forest,
Face the dark, danger, fear, till the long night's finally over.

No choice other than to keep watching, waiting for that rainbow,
Cause there must be one deep in hidden, no matter longevity's trial;
The only lifeline you have, your only small spark of hope,
To cling to as time passes, with more arising sorrow.

Photos of all the smiles, happiness you remember,
But you failed to maintain your grasp on, letting it slip through your fingers;
Look at the light in your eyes, before dark shadows consumed beneath,
When this present was the future, a horror not yet seen.

Those were the days of purity, innocence and free spirit,
When you could reach any star, from earth's safety filled atmosphere;
You had all you could need, all you could ever want,
Each day a happy song, a brand new fresh start.

But you shove the flashbacks away, avoiding the depressing reminder,
Emphasizing the contrast, to your current predicament;
How could you face more days of torture, with reminisce on your mind?
Fantasy's imaginaries impossible, when this is reality's fight.

Yes, this is grief, hurt and pain, sadness, pure despair,
Depression, hopelessness, cold shivering endless terror;
This is the desert, constant thirsting, melting under the rays,
Nothing satisfies you, an unquenchable strain.

You get up only to fall again, beat down harder each round,
And every time slower to rise, lift yourself back off the ground;
Fearing that this blow, is the last one you can take,
This downfall, the one, in final closure of defeat.

When all happiness fades in sobs, world flips on top of itself,
Can't find aspiration anymore, when you're too deep beyond help,
And the boat's rocking and shifting, a happy cruise no longer,
Now it's a struggle just for survival, to stay afloat on the waters.

Cause your rainbow's still absent, abandoned in the darkest hour,
And your flowers in death like sleeping, petals closed and withered;
Why is life always so jagged? Like carving out cliffs,
No peaceful rest lasts for forever, a war that never ends.

Yes, happiness dwells in spurts, impossible to grasp,
You cling to it maybe not hard enough, 'cause it always escapes your hands;
And you chase it, ceaseless, constantly, but it's like chasing wind,
It taunts you as it whisks by, 'cause it whipped you again.

But Joyous, why are you still searching for such a wary like thing?
Dependent on earthly treasures it carries, such flimsy blessings;
Why do you cry when it goes? You should still be rejoicing,
Cause fulfillment is fuller than is noticed, even when you're not smiling.

Ever burning blaze, that can't be snuffed out,
Joyous, joy is what you should carry, in a fountain from your heart;
Joy comes in the morning, but burns brighter at night,
It's not like happiness ever fleeting, it never leaves your side.

You shouldn't have to hold on, if you let it hold on to you,
And with it's touch the whole world seems lighter, the air oh so pure;
Your pulse racing faster, more than you thought could be true,
And your spirit flying father, than happiness's ever flew.

See Joyous, happy is only temporary, before its power's revoked,
But joy is everlasting, it will never let go;
Happy fails, joy does not, it always fulfills,
So Joyous, why are tears still falling? Find that joy in your will.

Cause joyfulness means a choice, to not let life go to waste,
Not to get up, but to never fall, into that dark, scary place;
But that's not denying sadness, it's overpowering despair,
Knowing tears don't fix anything, Joyous, that's why joy's there.

To strengthen, remold you, to piece back your heart,
To rejuvenate your flowers, that happiness ripped apart;
And happy's great when it's shining, but it always lets you down,
Too weak to thrive through the trenches, but that's where joy is found.

Joy is forever, eternity, joy never fails at all,
If you build it into your baseline, it won't let you stumble or fall;
You only get one life to live, and joy won't let it sink down the drain,
Making it brighter, you a fledged fighter, vibrantly dancing under the rain.

No one enjoys suffering or its emotions, so why suffer by choice?
If you can beat it, defeat it, and in the struggle, rejoice;
That's joyousness' beauty, it's the diamond in the rough,
And with it, impossible to sink under, Joyous, joy is enough.

Cause it makes you see life as worth living, nobility's cause,
There's so much to see, be, and believe, Joyous, joy makes life a song!
Choosing to party when your ship's barely sailing, 'cause fear only makes the hurt worse,
In freedom so much more is accomplished, and with joy and freedom life is only endorsed!

Now, you're carefree, living to be, not letting tomorrow define your today,
Not curling up but stretching out, and your weary limbs growing stronger through the pain;
When you laugh, as you smile, showing joy in every message you send,
Letting them see, inspired as you believe, that youthful glee never truly has to end.

Living's brand new, enjoy every moment and truth,
You're not pain immune, but your joy's bulletproof;
Joyous, your rainbow's spanning wide, beyond the skies,
Don't see life as a reason to die.

Cause there's still light in every dark, and that glow's more than enough,
Joyous, joy fuels from more than just happy fluff;
If takes the paralyzing fear, the despair and the tears,
And shows you why that cleansing made you takeoff clear.

So don't look for good, look for great,
Nothing can break what refuses to break;
And when it seems like happiness you can't find,
Just focus on that sparkle in your eyes.

Heartbreak can't steal your heart's beat, joy's guarding that entrance,
Joyous, it won't ever be moved, all you have to do is accept it;
So when you're happy, you fly, but when you're joyous, you soar!
And joy flows on eagle wings, a flight of which you'll never let go.

What that little voice whispers doesn't matter, you don't have to listen,
Cause your life is yours for the taking, and joy comes true when you take it;
Now you see why I'm so free, I don't let hurt drag me down,
And if you're hurt's not healing, look at me, joy's still in your heart as well.

Joy doesn't rely on circumstance, not in the moments of life,
Joy, unlike happiness, is pure paradise inside;
Cause when it rains, when it pours, that place will never change,
Happiness's washed away, but joy is here forever to stay.

In the fog, in the dark, spark it as your light,
Cause in the storm, in the grief, Joyous, joy doesn't have to die;
You'll reap it when you keep it, splitting open the hurt,
A feeling never to be overshadowed, an insuppressible spark.

The vastest emotion that builds you, joy's stronger than all the others,
In its own way it possesses more power, than the world's strongest weapon;
And with it comes love, comes peace, comes determination and fight,
An equal balance of inner glory, that's what gives it its might.

Joy's more contagious than disease, a sickness to end all fleeting pleasures,
Joyous, joy's not like momentary triumph, it's a consistent forever;
So if night's hours stretch on, there's always a beautiful rainbow,
In the depths of your soul, the one place that truly radiates like gold.

Cause sunny skies aren't above, so don't look forlorn in that way,
Open up the bottom of your heart, that's all it will take;
And joy's so much easier to hold, Joyous, it's attracted to you,
Once it activates at the start, it only grows stronger in you.

It's how you fight, persevere, Joyous, it's behind every asset,
It's the energy of heart and mind, something no one can resist,
It spreads uncontrolled, so easy to recognize,
Brighter, reaching higher, than wildfire in the night.

Happiness tends to lead into weakness, but joy is raw strength,
Joyous, joy does not disappoint, new miracles everyday;
Dreams more reasonable to achieve, joy puts it all into perspective,
Cause Joyous-

Your joy can never be taken.

From, Rea

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