101 Spots Lane

Pupperville

Dogland

PU99 1PG

Dear Miss Cruella-de-vill,

I am writing to inform you that your Disney Villain Club membership application has been revoked on the grounds that your recent attempt to steal ninety-nine Dalmatian puppies has failed and that you are simply not evil enough (unlike me). I would like to point out why your plan turned as horrible as your face!

Your first mistake was hiring those incompetent henchmen of yours, Horace and Jasper. For your information who would hire a fat pig and a drunk? Despite Jasper being border-line intellectual his mind is being corrupted by the mass amount of alcohol he drinks which means he is less inclined to obey you and get the task done to a good standard. Also you should know that they argue with each other a lot, especially over who skins and who kills which means the task takes longer to get done and that whilst they are arguing the puppies are escaping.

Your second mistake was stealing puppies, you should have stolen adult dogs so you would gain more fur. Also I don't know anyone who would be able to withstand the amount of noise ninety nine puppies make. You forgot that if you are going to keep them for a while you need to look after them so you can get better quality fur out of them. Why didn't you order for them to be skinned once they had been stolen? Its common sense, at this rate it would be easier for you to buy fake fur.

Finally when you could see things not going according to plan, why didn't you take over you lazy oaf? Haven't you heard the saying "if you want it done right, do it yourself"?

Your application was a waste of time, please don't send one again unless you prove yourself to be truly despicable.

Well done for being outsmarted by Dalmatians!

Maleficent

Head of DVC